TWADDLE everyday rubbish

Tiz Been A While..

2011-12-31T20:38:00.002Z

Well, tiz I.... so much has happened this pass year which meant I could not be here, or on your blobs - it does not mean I have not thought about each and every one of you - and Ive missed you all so much - and the more I left it the harder it was to log on - but, I need to come home, and home is here.... whether there is anyone here or not, I still need to be back here.... So hopefully in the coming days I will try to explain whats what..... I hope you are all well, I have so much catching up to do on every blobs its gonna take me a life time.....

so... HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL, OR ANYONE LEFT ALIVE..... if you could tidy the place up for when I come back in the coming days I would be grateful...jebus Ive missed Twaddling and you all....so very much..

love laughter and happieness to you all in the coming year....always

x

Last Crimbo (2009) Part I..

2010-12-09T13:29:00.047Z

Ok, I know its been yonks since last I was here and a longtime since I had the time to blob around all everyones blobs.... Im sorry, but life caught me by the short and curlies and I thought it best to step back from most things in life for a while.. but it doesnt mean each and everyone of me blob maties havent been in my thoughts daily..

There are reasons as to why I could not be here and if I wrote a proper list it would be as long as me arm, but Im sure over the coming months these reasons will be put down on Twaddle for the record lol... these are reasons not excuses... and of course the longer I left it the harder its been to tiptoe back in, and without dearest Buff my blogger friend who upped and bloody died on me, to nag me constantly in emails to 'get me arse back' its been hard, but I had to remind meself as to the reasons why I started this blob, and that was as a record of things in my life that my lads might oneday enjoy when I am no longer around, and jebus knows I have so much more to get down on record...

These are a few of the 'reasons' that spring to mind ....Life - My Best Blobber Friends Death (which had such a profound affect on me) - Allotment - Birthdays - Lack Of Work - Almost Financial Ruin - Woodelf - Sadness - Snippets Of Hope - Laughter - Tears - Struggles Beyond Measure - Loss Of The Most Precious Friendship With What Was A Dear Blobber/Sista Friend Which Im Still Finding It Hard To Get Over - Baby - New Chickens - Twat Neighbours - Summer - Twice A Week Physio - My Best Friend Here Wendy Whom Is The Reason Im Still Sane Even Though That Is Debateable...She Is The Only One That Truely Knows Whats Been Going On..

Anyways... Enough of all that.... I need to get down the things that happened last christmas before this christmas is upon us..... havent done one single thing as yet towards this years crimbo..... one has to be very creative when one is as skint as me lol....

So..... This one is in honour of my 4 sons, I wonder if they will ever truely know just how much I love them.... last Crimbo was the bestest Christmas we have EVER had.... filled with laughter, love, tears, togetherness in the face of adversity......

Im never prepared for just how quick christmas decends upon us, I always think its ages away, and I like to celebrate my Sams Birthday in the middle of November before I even think about whats got to be done in preparation for christmas......and then before I know it, its just a few weeks before actual christmas and Im all in a fluster and cos Im on my own there is so much I have to do....

Our Crimbo always starts with us going to cut down a tree at Southwick Estate something my Sam and Jacob always love to do with me... (dont know what will happen this year as the Estate is not opening the tree meadows this crimbo)..

Just look at that straggly specimen, and I dont mean me lads lol - we laff so much picking a tree and cutting it down and dragging it to the car... the old man that usually sits in the little shed and dishes out the saws for the cuttings was not there last year, which was upsetting, I presumed he had died, cos he was rather ancient... I said my condolences to the other bloke in the shed and waffled on and on about how sad it is that the old chap was no longer with us.... to which this bloke replied, after letting me prattle on and on..... oh, you think he is not here cos he has died *much laughter and shaking of his head* well, he says, he aint here cos he has gone for his teabreak, he unfortunatley is still alive and kicking LOL.... it was then my turn to shake me head lmfao

This photo of my Sam makes me smile, note he has a 'dew drop' on the end of his nose, cos it was so cold that day lol

We decorated our little house with things we get out year after year, we like the tradition of our old decorations, wooden decs and glass baubles and all the childhood decs me lads made as children and even a little glass tree dec from my childhood - our special bits and bobs of christmas's past, with the always new little added decoration of the present crimbo, usually a wooden one upon which we write the year and our names and ages, its become a family tradition, and its nice to pick out the decorations from when we first started it, the year we found ourselves on our own.. it was like a new beginning.. to see just how far we have come despite all the things that have been thrown at us especially over the past few years..

I cant imagine living in a house without a working fireplace, somewhere to burn huge logs and a bucket of coal over the winter months, especially at christmas for roasting chestnuts and marshmallows upon.... logs are so expensive over here but this year we managed to nick some hahaha (but thats another fasinating story) so will have at least enough to burn over the crimbo week...

I have this father christmas that I hang from my bedroom window...

The minded nippers love him, when they arrive in the morning and see him hanging from my window I tell them he is listening and watching to see who is being good lol....

But, from inside my bedroom I get a fright every morning when I pull me curtains back, and no matter how many times I do it, I ALWAYS get a fright and think its someone trying to get in me window lol....

See what I mean, every day it makes me jump when I open me curtains lmfao....

We decorate the windowsill.... see that white star hanging, well its a Norgewian star that my sister sent me about 25 years ago one crimbo when she lived in Norway, and do you know it still has the same lightbulb in it from all those years.. I love my star... and all me little old wooden bits and bobs we have on the windsill..

We decorate the fireplace with fir garlands and lights and cinnamon sticks and dried orange and fruits and special little wooden and tin bits and bobs... and of course my shabby chic santa takes pride of place :) we just have to move him when we light the logs.. the gold wicker stars with lights entwinned with I found about 15 years ago and just fell in love with them and they still work :) - we have beautiful tin wired stars hanging from me lights..... just natural wooden and tin things.... aint to kean on plastic rubbish lol

Then there is our tree, its never a perfect shape, cos we usually feel sorry for the little lone tree that everyone walks past and we always end up cutting that one down and bringing it home lol.... but at least it is loved for a few days.... and we wrap garlands up the stair bannisters and hanging all our beautiful wooden geese and moons and stars and bits from that to... the tree is always in our middle room cos there is no room in our little lounge...

So I know our decs aint to everyones tastes but Ive always loved the old wooden and tin and glass things just love the more natural feel of things.. I still have decs on our tree that me lads all made at pre-school lol....

From last year onwards our crimbo table will always have a beautiful crafted table runner that a once dear blobber friend sent us.... I love it almost as much as I love her... JBelle has started a new tradition in our house, and I will treasure it always and each and every year until I die, it will run down the middle of our crimbo table..

And of course no self respecting bottle of red would adorn the crimbo table without its little knitted father christmas :)

Do you know what I like about crimbo day in my home...... cos its just me and me lads for the morning, and sometimes one or more of their girlfrieds will come in the afternoon but mostly its just us, we dont have to dress up, we can lounge around in comfy gear or just JimJams.... we dont have to go all posh we can just be US...

Once dinner is in the oven we open our pressies, we only get pressies from each other, dont have grandparents or auntie and uncles to buy anything for me lads, so its just pressies from each other.... even though my lads have numerous uncles and aunties and still have a set of grandparents around, they never hear from them or get any recognition that they exist.... so you can see its been hard for me over the years to try and give them all a special crimbo with just US.... sometimes I look and read about other family crimbos and it makes me cry knowing what me lads miss out on, I mean they only have me, just me and each other, its not much... I have to just hope its been enough..

Anyways, we exchange our little gifts with much laughter and love in our little lounge filled with christmas decorations from years pass..... there are always smiles in our home a crimbo... often throughout the year there are many tears shed, mainly by me in the quiet of my own room... sometimes I dont even know why Im crying.. but on crimbo its all genuine smiles and laughter and love...

See what I mean about bumming around in jimjams and no tops lol oh and the smiles...Thats my Ben infront of the fireplace and my Sam on the right...

This is our Tom, he was really laffing, you see if you read this blob you will know about the 'turkey neck' from the other year, when I told our Sam that it was the turkey's willy and he believed me and I chased him around the house with it, well Tom is laffing in this photo cos our Sam wrapped up the turkey neck and put it in a parcel with Toms name upon it, and when he carefully opened what he thought was a nice pressie from his brother the turkey neck wobbled and moved as he opened the box and he jumped back with shock cos he thought it was some creature moving inside, it was just the funniest dam thing ever and we laffed for the rest of the day about it....

Ben laffing at Tom about the turkey willy lmfao

And here is the culprit LOL..... I think you just had to be there to see the funny side..

My lads have never written crimbo lists, not even when they were smaller.... father christmas would leave a little stocking filled with things from him on the end of each of their beds, he never left a big pressie like a bike or nuffin, cos I always felt if I had to struggle to buy a dam bike for each of them then at least it should be me that gets the fanks for it LMFAO... so, no lists, Ive always considered crimbo was about what people 'wanted' to buy another person, and I felt that I knew me lads well enough to know what I think they would like without no dam lists of greed and wants... and I dont think they have ever been disappointed....

T J and B looking at something Jacob got..

Maybe I should of bought Jacob a belt lmfao..

Monging out whilst dinner is cooking..

My bestest new slipper boots lol see how low maintenance I really am :)

Tom and Jacob trying to suss out their new Iphone applications and Ben and Sam sorting out guitar hero...

They must of been getting hungry cos me lads moved from the little lounge to the middle room lol....

love these shots of me lads all together trying to suss something out....

ok the turkey was cooked and time to EAT it was about 2ish by then and tummys were rumbling....

If anyone remembers me christmas past posts about the turkey willy and the birdseed cake which me lads thought was stuffing lmfao or the post and the photo about the EYES inside the turkey... well there always seems to be a funny thing about the turkey and last year was no exception.... I lifted the turkey out and placed it upon pride of place on the huge turkey platter... when Sam exclaimed WTF is that, pointing to the cooked turkey.... here let me show you..

See the flap of skin that covered the neck opening of the turkey, well I told Sam that it was the Turkeys Balls LMFAO hahahahaha.... yeah right he said and pretended he didnt believe me..... so, if he didnt believe me, how come I caught him doing this........

He was only taking a sneaky double peek at the turkey nuts lmfao hahahaha oh my goodness I sooooooooo laffed.....

We take it in turns to carve the turkey and this year it was Toms turn....

Its strange sometimes just being the 5 of us, when it use to be not only my sons father at the table but my mother and father and my brother and his wife... that seems so far away now, my parents are both dead and my brother parted ways, so its only been the 5 of us for years and years.... but, my goodness, do we laff at our christmas dinner table or what lmfao

My Sam was explaining about something he had done which sent us all into fits of laughter, its unrepeatable here but the 5 of us laffed so much (Sam looks like a redneck in this photo lol)

Yep, by now the giggles had got out of control lmfao

Please excuse the fishtank that had yet to be cleaned out and set up for a bearded dragon LOL

My Sam and Jacob are both as thin as sticks cos they both do extreme sports and burn more calories then I can possibly put inside of them.... and somehow the table talk got around to who had the biggest skinny muscles lmfao.... my Jacob on the left is 3 1/2 years younger then Sam on the right... Sam does extreme skateboarding and Jacob is a free-runner and a trampolinest, oh and is doing tree surgery and forest management at college so is up and down trees like a monkey and uses a chainsaw daily so has good upper body structure lol...

Skinny rats the pair of them :)

we usually spent a good couple of hours at the table eating dinner and numerous puddings and drinking and just talking about different things..

then its all back into the lounge to mong out, and Toms Girlfriend with whom he lives turned up (she had been at her mums for dinner lol)

So more laughter, I love this girl with all my heart, she is beautiful both inside and our and is about a foot shorter then my 6'4" Tom lol.... who would of thought that within 18 months of Tom splitting up with his long term (3 years) girlfriend just 18 months previous that he would of met such a beautiful girl as Sammy and got engagement and moved in with each other.... Sammy just slipped into our family unit like a soft hand in a glove, it was meant to be.....

Anyways I need to close this terribly long post lol.... but before I do I must just add this......... last crimbo I decided not to fill up each of me lads stockings with new socks and boxers, you know like us parents do to bulk out their stockings (and yes I still do them each a stocking) but upon seeing the next photo...

maybe I should of at least got Tom some new socks lmfao

So there was crimbo 2009 in my house.... if nuffin else it was filled with love and laughter and surely thats what its all suppose to be about....

I doubt if anyone is still here or anyone has read my long winded post, but I needed to get it down before this coming crimbo is truely upon us....

It was THE BEST christmas day we had ever had, and usually they are good, but this one, well it just had an ease about it, it didnt matter that we didnt eat til 2ish or that the sprouts were a tad soggy or the parsnips fell on the floor lol.... it was just the best......

and tomorrow would be boxing day, usually the day I love best in the whole year.... and within this next week I WILL get down about that day.... it was to turn out to be the most surprising special day in a very long time.... a day that bought more laughter and tears running down my face with joy.....

so, know you are loved Twaddlers if any of you still exists.... and I will do Crimbo Part II in the coming days......

OXO

Heather... We Loved You ... RIP

2010-05-25T08:54:00.011Z

Ok....... I still need to do me crimbo post but I need to get down something that happened the weekend before last.... probably no one here to read, but this is a diary of my life events for me lads to read one day....

Sorry I aint been around, life has just been in the way..... my dear friends hubby had his brain tumour op, its not gone to well, they couldnt get it all out, so its harrowing times for this dear family... and Ive tried to be there for me matie.... me other divorcing matie is getting on me tits though.... dont even get me started on that one lol - and Im still trying to rob Peter to pay Paul, I have picked up a couple of part time nippers though so maybe things are gonna pick up soon, cos I sure know this is no way to live....existance is not living...

Anyways.....

Last month I joined a Pet site via facebook..... it was a semi rescue/selling site for pets and accessories....

Someone on there had a cocketiel and cage that they no longer wanted.... and I know my Jacob would LOVE one of these birds so I rang the number and spoke to a well nice lady in town, she said the bird was called Major and he was very tame, they just didnt have the room for him no more what with a new baby on the way..... so I arranged to go into town with my lad to have a butchers at the bird to see if it was what he wanted.....

Well, blimey, he fell in love with the dam thing.... so Major and its cage came home to live with us..... and he was/is tame... we gets him out everyday and he spends most evenings perched on someones head or on someones shoulder, he says loads of things and when no one is around during the day, Im trying to teach him 'bollocks' LOL but he aint having non of it........ he does say HELLO MAJOR and HELLO BABY and NITE NITE MAJOR..... and cos he says these things it means my Jacob had to keep his name the same....

This is Major sitting on our Sams head..

Me cats dont seem to bothered with him, oh they had a little paw at the cage the night we bought it home, but thats about all.....

I love this photo, if you look carefully to the right you can make out our fat Cat Buff staring through the bars of majors cage, thinking, just one wrong move dam bird and you're my lunch lol

So... we had only had Major for a week and eveyone loves him..... my Tom that lives with his girlfriend was besotted by him, and the following Sunday our Tom and Sammie his girlfriend turn up one Sunday morning, everyone else is in bed and he says...... Ive got an idea mum.... how funny would it be if Jacob woke up and found another bird in the cage with Major.... you know, a GIRL bird..... so I says.... what? he says, we have just been to the pet shop to get crickets for the Chamelions and they have some well cute cocketiels there..... thats it he says, before Jacob gets up Im going to go buy him another bird..... and he disappears.....

This is Major, aint he sweet.. and if he sits on ya shoulder he fiddles with ya chain round ya neck or ya earring or even fiddles with ya hair.... and he aint once did a poo whilst out of his cage :)

Jacob and Major....

Well LMFAO..... he comes back about 15 mintues later with the funniest of funny birds..... it was the fattest cocketiel I have ever seen.... its face was so fat that its beak sorta looked more like a little nose... it was so pretty though be it a little hunched back looking...... Tom picked it cos it was on its own in the aviary and was just on the floor pecking around, he said.... it looked like no one would love it so I knew it had to come here LMFAO....

I think it was to heavy to actually fly.... anyways we put it in the cage with Major and he went mental...... he was shouting.... hello baby hello baby over and over.... Jacob woke up and came down and he to was besotted with the new bird and Major by then was in LOVE..... it was so sweet, he would lay his head on the fat birds chest...

So....... the new bird was to be called HEATHER...... doodles will not understand this, but it is named after Fat Heather off of Eastenders which is a telly programme here, cos this bird looks just like Fat Heather....

It to was fairly tame, but I think its more cos it couldnt actually fly off cos it was to heavy..... but we loved fat Heather.... and Major certainly was in love with his new cage matie....

All was well for 5 days.... then Jacob got up at 6 on the Friday morning for college and he came down the stairs well quiet.... Fat Heather died mum in the night, I uncovered them this morning and she is laying on the floor of the cage... dead.....

oh no, I says...... he said, last evening she was making well funny noises and me and Tom filmed her cos it was funny, but now I come to think about it, it was probably her dying cos the noises wheren't normal.... but we just thought she was showing off to Major.....

Oh my Jacob, Im so sorry, but at least you gave her 5 days of fun and love and she did like us and she seemed happy..... what have you done with her now.... oh, I put her in a plastic carrier bag in me room, will have to bury her when I get back from college..... Tom will be sad and to think he had wasted 30 quid on a bird that only lasted 5 days.....

Well...... whilst Jacob was at college I had some things to do in town so whilst there I popped into the pet shop, cos my reckoning was that a bloody bird should last longer then 5 days, when we had looked after it proper, it shouldnt just up and die on us.... this is what happened at the pet shop......

I wander in the door and go up to the counter where a nice looking lady is standing behind the till..... I swear on my life this is the conversation that followed..

hello she says..... hello I say back... Heather is dead.. the woman looks at the other woman at the other till and turns back to me and says...... oh Im very sorry about your loss... Im really upset I say and I dont know where I stand, its all been very upsetting..... again the woman says Im so very sorry, maybe see a bereavement councillor, was Heather your mother? (she must of thought I was some nutcase that had just wandered in off the street she obviously didnt realise I was talking about Fat Heather our bird)..

Im to upset for councilling I said, I just want to swap her for something else...... blank stares from the woman..... pardon the woman says... I want to swap Fat Heather for another bird I says......... OH she says smiling... Fat Heather was a bird you bought from here, its NOT your mother?... nah its not me mother, I wouldnt swap my dead mother for the time of day, she hated me, she was more a cow then a bird I says...... with that the woman lost the plot and just burst out laffing as did her staff mate on the other till......... sorry I said but I dont think its funny, we loved Heather and you must of sold us a dodgy bird... so I would like to swap her for one that is breathing, cos our bird is dead and is not breathing.......

hahahaha the woman laffed you want to swap it for one that is breathing, now that is funny she said....... me, still with a dead straight face said...... so what do I do...

Have you got the bird, opps sorry, Fat Heather with you.........what do you think I am? mad? do you really think I would take a dead bird out with me shopping, no she is at home in a plastic recycleable carrier bag in the bottom of the fridge.....I think it is a biodegradable one and not just any old bag...I just didnt wanna put her in one that might suffocate her......... the tears were rolling down the womans face, but you said she was dead, I doubt it would make any difference what bag she was in..... out of respect I say, to Heather, she still has a soul... hence the biodegrable bag....so, I says...... what do you want me to do with Fat Heather that now resides in a carrier bag in the bottom of me fridge...... please please dont tell me you really have dead fat heather in the bottom of your fridge....... its ok I say, she is under the bag of chopped lettuce, I didnt wanna leave her on the side in the kitchen incase the cats decided to have a nibble on her.... god rest her soul......

By now the woman was in uncontrollable fits of laughter........ Im sorry you find this so funny I say, to laff at someones obvious distress about the loss of their dead fat Heather I dont find amusing....

Im sorry the woman is trying to say through muffled gulps of laffing....

Ok, the woman says....... if you could bring dead Fat Heather back to the shop you can have your money back....... we just want to swap her for one that is breathing I say.... ok she says, tears still rolling down her face....... I'll bring the dead bird back when I come to pick my boy up around 6ish... you will see she really is dead and Im not just making it up to get a different bird....

Fine the woman says......I hope Im still on shift when you come back...... and she walks away down the shop shoulders heaving with laughter...... some people can be so insensitive to others loss......

So with dead Fat Heather uncovered from underneath the mixed salad in the fridge I pick me lad up and we go back to the pet shop...... I explained to the bloke that the lady during the day said we were to bring Fat Heather back to swap her for a breathing bird...... the bloke says, Val told me to expect you... we dont usually swap animals unless they die within 48 hours of purchase...... I give him the evil eye and say.... at 30 quid Heather should of lasted more then 5 days.... you either swap my boys dead bird for another healthy breathing bird or Im gonna shove it where the sun dont shine which will be easy cos by now Fat Heather is rather stiff....he just burst out laffing and said, under the circumstances I will let you pick another one........ like you even had a choice I mumble...

So the upshot of it is that Jacob got to pick out another bird..... and I told the bloke that if this one also dies within a week it to will be bought back and swapped.....I dont think he dared argue lol

At least Heather had a lovely few loved filled days with us....... the bloke said it was to late in the day to do anything with the dead bird and he would sort it out in the morning (they send them away to find out why they died incase they have dodgy breeders that supply them) and with that he shoved Dead Fat Heather under the counter....... I just hoped that whoever came on first shift the following day didnt think someone had left them a donna kebab for their breakfast lmfao

This is our new bird, as yet unnamed...... I will get the photos of Fat Dead Heather off of our Jacobs camera and show you what a pretty funny girl she was before she died.... just aint downloaded them onto the computer yet :)

I expect thats a day in the life of a pet shop worker that wont be forgotten in a hurry :)

Sorry, but I can only be me....... I know I aint normal..... but still, I wouldnt want me any other way lol

I promise to do better in the blobbing stakes.... here and around other blobs.... please forgive me..... life aint been easy...

ok, to much Twaddle for one rather hot May morning ...

x

Spring Reflections..

2010-04-04T08:23:00.003Z

ok...... I dont know where the last few weeks have gone.... a dear friends hubby has just found out his 'strange turn' the week before last, is due to an egg sized brain tumour nestled behind his eye socket, so worrying times for my friend, and their 2 girls and young son whom I have childminded for the past 5 years...

I saw me friend yesterday outside our village shop and asked how things were going... she said easter would be strange this year.... to which I replied...... well, you wont have to buy Richard an easter egg, not if his tumour is egg shaped, least that saves a bit of money.... to which she replied....... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahaha fank you Mel for being you, everyone has pussyfooted around, but you, are just you.... I'll tell Richard your words they will make him laff LOL..... sometimes I think I need to keep me mouth shut LOL...

And another friend is just starting on the road called 'divorce street' and she thinks life aint gonna change for her and her 16 and 13 year old.... oh my.... except, I think she already has someone lined up on the side lines...... *rolling me eyes* but as usual, I will be there for her....

Anyways.... this is just a quickie...... being Easter Sunday and all...... as you know I dont 'do god' even though many says he does me lol....

Ive had a couple of very 'trying' days this week.... many also uncontrollable tears.... desperately trying to figure things out on me own on many aspects of life..... and Ive been bashing meself up bigtime.....

BUT.......

When I got up this morning an tiptoed down the stairs as to not wake anyone up, you know, to bung the kettle on and let me chickens out and move me car off the Baptists Chappels forcourt (the only place to park last night when I got in from a reflective tearful drive) or that vicar will be knocking me up when church starts.....

This is what I saw as I was half awake waiting for the kettle to boil......

I have this little wire beaded heart hanging from the handle of one of me kitchen cupboards.... and there reflecting on me tiles was this heart shape..... the strange thing is the sun was not shining through me kitchen window cos its to early in the day.... I couldnt work out how there was a shaddow...... then I followed the line of the light and it was coming through my kitchen roof skylight window which was being reflected off me twat neighbours open window......

bloody hell..... DO YOU THINK ITS A SIGN FROM GOD........... and dont say a sign of madness LOL

Those that 'do god' have the most special of days........ and those that dont do him, well, still have a special day lol

Be safe and be kind to one another...

love you..

x

Marriage and Banana Bread...

2010-03-15T20:43:00.008Z

Ok....... I know its been yonks since Ive been here or anywhere else, except the odd comment on faceache, oops I mean facebook.... just been trying to keep afloat here, still without any between school hours paid work.... just trying desperately not to go under.... but as yet, I keep bobbing to the surface, I refuse to drown until there is no hope left......I get just to the point of no return and something little comes along with lines me pockets with a bit of dosh to see us through the week, but do I hide every penny, do I hell, I sent a couple of little friendship gifts to a few and when I only had a fiver left last week I gave it to someone I know that was, I thought, more skint then me, found out later they spent it going out with friends and not on that bread and milk for their kids..... I live and learn lmfao

Im also sorting me house out with an option to sell it, which would be hard after this being our home like forever..... still at physio.. who would of thought that they could cock up both knees aye and by doing so, I'd lose me daytime babies, and cos of the knock on I'll probably loose me house....... life aye..... all cos I had to have surgery... wish I hadnt had either surgeries now........ oh well.... aint much I can do about it now but keep plodding along with my stubborn pigheaded strong YOU WONT BEAT ME attitude LOL - I dont share my problems with anyone, well, me matie Wendy who is my bestest matie here, knows everything, she is the one that came to court with me back before crimbo.....I'd trust her with my life.. other then her knowing stuff, I keep meself to me self, cos Ive learnt if you share to much or take people into ones confidence (people around here I mean - here meaning in this village) they eventually turn it around and use it against you for their own gain..... so I do what Ive always done all me life.... and try and suss and sort everything out meself ...

Anyways..... I doubt if anyone is still around, but Im posting this for me lads to one day read when Im long gone....

I WILL do me crimbo post lmfao...... it will be the latest crimbo post in the history of blobber :) - except I know its gonna be a tad long and I thought if I could post this, what happened last week, then it would ease me back into Twaddling :)

But first, before the crimbo post,I wanna get down in words what happened to me last Thursday.....

I had 25 quid in me pocket to go get some groceries for us all...... Im trying to keep the 4 of us on the little Im earning at the moment, only 4 cos our Tom now lives with his girlfriend, but with Jacob still in education and both my Ben and Sam being made redundant and of course me without me daytime nippers, just me before and after schoolers, you can imagine...... Im robbing Peter to pay Paul and Paul has already been mugged twice this week LMFAO...

So...... there I was in a the little grocery shop up in town with me 25 quid in me pocket, as I put a quid in to get a trolley I spied something that I have always always wanted... on a shelf near the shopping trolleys were rows and rows of Orchids..... oh my, I have always always wanted an orchid, but they are well expensive in the florists... and knowing me, them being posh plants, it would probably only live a week LOL.....

BUT... these beautiful orchids of all different colours and shapes were only a fiver ($8) I asked the bloke why they was so cheap, whats the matter with them I says...... nuffin he says..... they are advertised at that price to bring people in, and then those people will buy other stuff not just the Orchids...... but a fiver was a fifth of the money I had for groceries LOL and already me list was on its bare bones of its arse.....

I picked up this most beautiful orchid and then put it back and picked it up and put it back LOL...... well, I must of been mumbling to meself cos I heard next to me someone say.... arent they beautiful... to which I say, yes they are, Ive always wanted one, but I dont need one, not really, I have other things more important to buy, like FOOD lol..... well when I actually turned and looked who has spoken to me, there stood this tiny little VERY old lady... she to had picked up one of the orchids... snap (snap means jinx over here) she said, she had picked up the same shape and colour as the one I to was holding.... I again said, I dont really need one, anyways I would probably kill it within a week and again I put it back........she sorta giggled in an old lady sorta way and said, oh they are easy to keep, Ive had one 15 years, and I to dont need this one, and she put hers back to LOL..... we looked at each other and at the same time both picked one up and burst out laffing....... oh sod it I says to her..... lets both go crazy and get something we dont need in life but something for once we just WANT..... lets she says and burst out laffing again.... and I smiled at her and went on my way.....

Here it is, they had yellow ones and white ones, cream ones, plain purple sorta ones and then this one..... I just thought it was a bit different, like me LOL

I know this one is a little blurry but you can see just how ugly/pretty the flower is.....

Just inside the double doors to the actual shop there are buckets and buckets of flowers, you know, bunches.... they caught my eye.... dam and bugger...... I aint had flowers in the house since the ones that Iggy sent me after crimbo curled up eventually and died on me.... and there was a bucket full of purple and white flowers just crying at me to pick them up and put the Orchid back LOL..... so I did... I did what I did with the orchid, I picked them up and put the back, picked them up and put them back and actually said out loud.... dam Mel you DONT need them you greedy cow you have an orchid you dont need, now forward and onward.... and believe me I really truely DID say that to meself.... I didnt give a dam who was listening lol..... I had to be firm with meself, I had already over stepped the mark with having the 5 pound orchid in me shopping trolley....

So I quickly move away from the flowers, with a sorta sadness in my soul.. but there would be other times, better times.... and once again my house would be filled with jugs of flowers...

So I get to the fresh fruit and veggie part of the shop.... one thing I have emerced (is that spelt right? lol) in is my baking..... Ive always cooked and baked from scratch everyday, but now I could make a meal fit for a king from an onion LOL people cant believe how well we eat somedays out of nuffin :)..

Where was I, oh yes, the fruit and veg part of the shop....... so, my mind is whirling with what I would be cooking in the coming days and what I would need..... sweet potatoes... normal spuds..... brocolli, onions, leeks, swede, salad stuff, melon, apples, oranges, and the biggest bunch of bananas you could imagine (the fruit and veg in this particular shop is always the freshest and the cheapest anywhere - hence why I shop there)... as I turn round to put the bananas in me shopping trolley the same little old lady was next to me, I smile and she smiled back, then I looked at what she had in her shopping trolley......... bloody hell.... she had the same orchid as I had in mine, she had just put sweet potatoes and spuds and swede and all the other things the same as me in her trolley, hers was exactly the same as mine, except she HAD picked up the bunch of purple and white flowers.......

Oh my I say...... just look at our trolleys, they have the exact same things in, except for the flowers and they are in my trolley in my mind I says LOL...... how strange she answers......... Oh My Goodness I say out loud whilst looking her in the eyes...... YOU ARE ME WHEN IM OLD Im looking at me in the future, you are who I will be...... to which she burst out laffing, I mean right proper laffing...... and then she said...... oh my dear it will be a few years before you are my age, but it is strange how we have the same items in our trolleys....... yep I says... you are me, except I doubt I will shrink as small as you...... again she laffed so hard I thought her false teeth were gonna shoot out..... she was quite a posh little old lady, with a nicely spoken voice (unlike me lol)... oh cripes I say...... your stalking me...... and she laffed even more hahahaha

Go on she says, how old do you think I am..... ok, me being the diplomat, I says ohhhh well your me in the future and I reckon your about 65ish....... oh my, she let out the most funny sound... and sorta did a funny little jig lmfao...... you have made my day, you have made my week she said.... Im 83 she said with such pride..... now, I knew this beautiful cute little old lady wasnt anywhere near the 65 years I had guessed at..... but, hey..... I had made her day, her week..... you wait until I tell my daughter she said, you just wait until I tell her about you and the flowers and the sweet potatoes and you thinking Im you in the future and only 65.... and she reached out with her wrinkled old hands and wrapped them tight around me and hugged me until I thought I was gonna have to throw a tomatoe at her to let me go then she reach up and took my face in those old wrinkly hands and she kissed my face and said thank you..... and she then just continued on her way....

Well. lordy...... what am I like LOL...... I aint normal right...... who says things like that to little old strangers in grocery shops....

So........ I have to rethink me list in me head cos I had the orchid in me trolley which was a fifth of the money I had to spend.... so I whizzed around the rest of the shop.... bread flour, yeast, eggs, butter, chorizo sausage...... I aint bought bread for over 5 weeks, I make bread twice a day and pizza dough..... so I bought a huge bag of flour...... adding everything up in me head as I went along.... I would hate to get to the checkout and not have enough money on me..... I know I would make a joke out of it, if that happened, but inside I would die of embarrassment lol....

Anyways...... there are a couple of people in front of me in the queue so I stand in line to wait me turn, I had nowhere near a full trolley but too much to put in a wire basket... when I see out of the corner of me eye that someone had joined the queue behind me..... as I turn round (cos Im nosey like that) there stands this bloke, about 50ish holding just 3 items in his hands, he smiles the most amazing huge smile at me..... I bet inside he was thinking....... sod it, that bloody woman in front has a trolley and I only had 3 items, I'll be here ages...... of course, Im only guessing that those there his thoughts lol

I look at his 3 items then look at my half trolley and turn around to face him and say........ would you like to go in front of me seeing as you only have a few things, cos I bet you are swearing at me inside your head cos I have half a trolley full....... he continues to beam this huge smile....I dont think he had false teeth LMFAO.... are you sure he says..... well, I says..... I only do ONE good deed a day, and it looks like your the lucky one..... BUT my one good deed comes with a consequence...... ok, he says, still beaming, and that consequence would be what? he says... actually I say, it comes with 2 LOL..... oh now ya pushing it he says, still beaming.... ok spill them, what are they........ ok.. first you have to promise to keep smiling at people today cos it might be the only smile they get during the day...... done, he says........ and, I say..... you have to pay it forward..... blank look on his face...... yes I repeat, you have to pay it forward, you have to pay forward a good deed to a total stranger today with no gain for yourself....... he was still smiling as he said...... DONE, and he slipped past me to stand in front with his 3 items..... as his turn comes up he leaves the queue and walks over to the stand where the bunches of flowers were and quickly picks up a bunch, only the dam bloody same bunch that I had put back about 4 times lol....... inside I thought..... dam git, someone is lucky, they are getting flowers from Mr Smiley man.... he puts them on the checkout with his other items.... the woman rings them up, he pays with cash, then turns around and hands the flowers to me....... now there was blank stares from me....... there you go he said....... Im paying it forward.....what I say?...... he said.... I was watching you interact with that little old lady, I was behind you outside where the orchids were, and I listened to what you were saying and I watched as you umm'd and arr'd over the flowers, then again I listened and watched you with the same little lady at the veggies, and I saw how you made a complete strangers day, someone you didnt even know, and now you have made mine with your kindess........ and he holds out the flowers and says, these are for you.... WILL YOU MARRY ME ....... hahahahahaha I take the flowers and he is beaming and I say.......

Dam, I cant this afternoon I have to make banana bread...... to which he creases up laffing and winks at me and walks out the door laffing......

There....... I lost me chance LMFAO...... probably my only ever chance at someone asking me to marry them hahahahaha ok I know he wasnt serious, but still...... why oh why did I say I had to make banana bread... what am I like lmfao

These are the flowers and I know they look pink but they aint they are mauve....

Dam, I wonder where he might of taken me on honeymoon, I never did have a proper one first time round LOL..

Ok enough boring Twaddling for one evening...... its good to be back..

OXO

Im A Useless Blobber Right? LOL

2010-01-15T09:34:00.004Z

Ok... first of all Im sorry I aint been Twaddling or blobbing... life has been a whirlwind of different things and the longer I left logging in here the more I felt maybe my time was done here, then I logged on and saw all your comments.... blimey, your suckers for punishment lol

Second of I hope you all had a great crimbo and new year....I did raise me glass to you all, and I even got rat-arsed a few times...... apparently Im funny when Ive had a drink lmfao

One thing I did put mind and soul into was finishing the qualification I started back in the year, me CCLD NVQ3... its usually a 2 year course at college, but I decided to do it on the job and gave me self 6 months..... but of course me second surgery with complications was in the middle so its taken a little longer, but still a 2 year course done and dusted and PASSED in just 8 months aint something to snot at :) - YEP I PASSED this week..... and there was me thinking I was well to old for pages and pages of indepth work LOL.... but once I get me teeth into something there is no stopping me..... It felt good to get the results and realise I still have it in me to absorb stuff and to write great papers full of my knowledge and experience in the field of work I find myself in...... so cheers to me LOL.... I was told my papers were 'a tad different' and filled with not only the indepth content needed but also with funny quips, stories and sayings, apparently some of my papers had the assessor laffing in her office LOL.... well you know me, I can only be me, be it writing serious papers or writing Twaddle....

Over the past few weeks Ive tried to stack on the shelves of me mind all the negative and shit things that have been in my life this past few years, all the things that was eating away at the person I was, I let certain people sorta take away my ability to wear me 'well ard' head and be the strong tough person Ive been all me life, I opened way to much and Ive paid the consequences.... and if I hadnt of done that then I would of maybe coped with all these surgeries and negative people that seem to cling to me like 'clingons on a hairy bum' LOL.... I can do that, stack things away, the shelves of me mind are full of things, sometimes I take them down like an old favourite book and smile at the wonderful memories, and sometimes I take the wrong things off the shelves and I let them affect me.... well, usually Im a tough biscuit to crunch and Id like to think that most of the past 2 years and some of the people thrown in that mix are stacked on the top shelf, left to gather dust and forgotten for good....

Sooooooooo crimbo...... I/we had the most loverly of times.... it was very relaxed and just the funniest.... cos of the tension thats been hanging around our home for a few months now, I have NOT been the best person to live with lol...I will be the first to admit that.... I'll put it down to hormones LMFAO...but in fact I realise its where Ive just been so very very scared, probably the first time truely in my life.....scared of so many things, things that usually I just think 'what will be will be' and I let that fear flow into my core and affect the balance of HERE.... I was also a little concerned that crimbo would not be the same, or that it would be our last 'together' but you know what, this crimbo was the BEST one we have had for years, and our crimbos are usually great, but this one seemed special........ its as if we had all come back together as one....the love just oozed out of the doors of my house, it has pulled us back together, moulded us back into our unit that has held us all together all these years on our own.... we kept ourselves to ourselves and just enjoyed being with each other, I went to bed in tears, but they were tears of joy and not the tears that Ive shedd for months.... I thought we had lost US but we hadnt, it was there all the time...just buried a little under the burdens of life... we seemed to come to a pact, a silent pact.... without even saying anything... we realise WE are all we have.... just us.... we have no one else here, no one that truely cares about us.... no family on either side that gives a shit....just US.. we have US..

And even though Im fighting desperately to keep a roof over our heads and Im scared and dont know which way to turn, dont know how to sort this one out....I know that whatever happens... we will always have US.... the unconditional love that we only seem to have around these parts.... we are unmaterialistic and our needs are very small compared with most people I know around here..... I need to find 'my people' so Ive stepped away from most people that have been in my life, cos, we dont wear the same gloves..... shit, mine dont even match let alone be designer ones LMFAO....

I'll explain a little more another time........ I just wanted to put something up in here to let you know Im alive....to exist is not living...... but at the moment it will do for me, it has to....

We have been snowed in for almost a week..... I'll post about that soon..

I will do a proper post over the weekend and tell you all about our crimbo with photos..... I think this is the first post without photos.... but, I doubt anyone is even here to read it anyways LMFAO...

If anyone is here....... Know you are loved..... Iggy fanks dear sweet you for the beautiful flowers that came in the week, and JBelle for the amazing parcel filled with beautiful things I will treasure always, and my dear dear friend Jolie for the beautiful handmade things again they will be treasured for ever, they came this week once the post vans could get through, ok so they had to stop at the end of the road and trek through the snow, but trek they did......Love you all, but you so shouldnt be spending your hard earned dosh on the likes of me :) - we had had no post for a week.... so what a loverly surprise to have 3 things arrive as soon as the post was back up and running.... my heart sings for you all..

ok ok I'll leave you with just a couple of photos .......

Our Jacob is nuts lol the trampoline was so soft and fluffy with snow lmfao

DONT EAT YELLOW SNOW :)

Enough Twaddle for today, see you over the weekend....

OXO

HAPPY CRIMBO MATIES...

2009-12-24T23:35:00.003Z

Ok.... things have been right proper hectic around here, the wrapping job has taken up every minute of the day when I aint been minding and every minute of the evenings.... some nights up till gone midnight, but its all done and dusted.... Father Christmas was pleased that over the past 4 weeks I had managed to wrap 10,000 yes 10,000 pressies for the grotto.... Im all bloody wrapped out, you should see my sad state of wrapping me lads and minded nippers pressies today and this evening lmfao...... and of course the more Strawberry wine Ive drunk the worse this wrapping is lmfao...... it does not pay to be rat-arsed whilst wrapping :)

And I had nippers full time this week cos the schools broke up.... so Im sorry I have neglected you... I WILL catch up with emails and posts and blobs over the coming week....

Anyways, I wanna fank you all for sticking by me through thick and thin this past year, its not been an easy ride for me what with 2 major surgeries with such shit complications....... but soon it will be a new year..... and things will be different, right? LOL

SOooo........... HAPPY CHRISTMAS MY DEAR FRIENDS....... health, love, laughter, happieness and good friendships I wish upon you all for the coming year ahead....

know you are loved...... and even though I am tad rat-arsed, I mean it from the depths of me heart :) hic hic

x

Mission Complete...

2009-12-16T12:59:00.028Z

Ok, I know its been a while..... things have been difficult so I just tend to keep meself to meself.... and besides having me before and after schoolers, Ive been doing that dam wrapping for that company every spare minute of the day and night up until I go to bed at night and a few nights that meant wrapping til gone 1 in the morning.... and Ive still had to try and suss and sort everything home here out and fit in physio twice a week, YES Im still at physio, I have a few problems, but Im plodding on..... dont say a word or I will be in tears..... and whilst I was at physio this week I had my Sam in Accident and Emergency with a suspected broken ankle.... just glad he hadnt actually broken it though.... Im totally exhausted, and I mean totally, mind body and soul..... and I aint even done nuffin as yet towards crimbo..... thinking I might just give it a miss this year..... except we did go and cut our tree down last Sunday BUT it still stands naked and bare in out kitchen just propped up against the table, we aint even had time or the thought to do anything with it... and I dont even know if we will bother LOL

Anyways enough about my shit lol - I so wanted to get this post sorted, I know its just a little over a week until crimbo and there is me gonna do a halloween post LOL better late then never right?

I found this photo this week from when me lads were little and we won the village pumpkin competetion....

oh my, how I wish I could get this time back.. and NO my Jacob aint wearing a girlie pink coat, YES it is pink but it was a french jacket and it was actually a boys coat, note the blue and mustard insets and the lined hood LOL...

I dont know if anyone remembers my Halloween post from last year, and how one child actually piddled his pants :) well the stakes were raised this year and we was on a mission to make kids wet and soil there trousers LOL...... ya see, when I was over the school the days leading up to halloween, so many parents asked me if I was gonna be 'doing' halloween this year, you see, our house has started to become 'the place' to visit LOL......

But you see, I dont give kindness and sweet talk on halloween to anyone, not even children, I firmly believe that if you take your kids out trick or treating no matter what age, then you have to expect to be scared and I mean scared...(ya see, I have to be kind and sweet and nice to my minded kids, so halloween is at least a time when I aint regulated by rules and policies hahaha)... and apparently Im the only house in the village that does that LOL most just open the door sweetly and give out bags of sweets.... well NOT IN THIS HOUSE WE DONT......my little house is getting a bit of a reputation...

I set Sam the task of carving the pumpkins.... one is never to old for that and he got right proper stuck in :)

Me and Jacob baked most of the day on halloween.....I didnt wanna be spending to much money on sweets so we made plates and plates of little fairy cakes...

oh my I think me oven door needs cleaning lol.... we then iced the mini fairy cakes with orange icing and put eyeball chocolates on the top...

And these mummy head pizzas we made trays and trays of (oh shut it, they looked good in the recipe lol)..

We also make hotdog mummys but I cant find the photos.... they were hotdogs wrapped in a mummy like fashion in flakey pastry and baked in the oven then little faces added, they looked well proper good and Im bummed that I cant find where I put the photos.....but here is the picture from the recipe page..

Mine of course looked better then these :)

We did also have a skull plate full of sweeties.... and we even made a real surgical heart jelly where the kids had to dip their fingers in the heart to retrieve eyeball chocolates.....

Ya see, most dont get trick or treaters calling, but I KNEW we were in for a barrage of trickers this year cos word had spread about how much fun our house was to come a knocking at..so we had to be prepared...

I did think during the week that the parents miss out, the children get all the treats and they as adults dont get nuffin, so we thought we would make home made truffles with a bit of a surprise for all the adults that would come calling with their children.....

Dont they look great..... and oh my the parents were so very happy and delighted to be thought of :)

Here is the recipe for the truffles..

First melt a big pot of chocolate..... dont go using the best, just cake cooking chocolate will do cos they dont stay in their mouths for long LMFAO....

Next take some button sized brussel sprouts and cook until soft but not to squishy..and tip into the melted chocolate.... whirl around until the sprout is completely covered in the chocolate.. *Evil Grin*

See, dont they look just like normal truffles........

I had a bit of help from me lads at the beginning of the evening, you know, in the scaring department, we sorted out them out as they was all going to a party, so they got a few scares in to start me off LOL.... then the rest of the evening it was down to me to do the scaring....

Our Tom got the first point for making a child wet his trousers LOL.....the child was terrified after I opened the door and once he had calmed down and the father had explained that it was JUST MELODY WITH A MASK ON..... our Tom came around the side of the house and the kid went nuts LMFAO.... it was just the funniest....

Tom and Sammie done up as gouls.... all their make up was from stuff in the kitchen cupboards, unlike last year when I painted out Tom with Emulsion green paint from the shed LOL..

sorry the photo is sidewards I cant make it turn round lol...... Ben was off to a old goul slags party.... he to scared the hell out of kids before he left for the party lmfao

And our Sam, well, he went to a NERDS party lmfao

And this is the best we could do lmfao... he dont look nuffin like this usually, he had his shirt tucked in and his waistband was almost up to his armpits lmfao..... and no, he was NOT allowed to wear those glasses he had on, they are my new ones and had just cost me $500, but we found an old pair of mine and popped the lenses out and he wore them..

Our Jacob was out and so we didnt get no photo of him cos he got sorted at his mates house....

Ok, me lads all buggered off to their different parties which left little old me to hold the fort.....

I wear a horrendous mask and when someone knocks on me door I shout in the most witchy voice I can muster WHATDAYA WANT.... CLEAR OFF.... and when they knock again I stoop right low and open the door just a crack and peer out..... when you open the door at child level they are not expecting it, neither are they expecting the door then to fling open and me to be standing their stooped over holding a half life size skeleton LMFAO.... hence the first casualties of the evening lmfao...kids scream and adults laff.... sometimes I didnt hold the skeleton but a severed hand which has batteries in it and the fingers move and I make the kids shake the hand lmfao.... jebus I am sooooooo mean :)

This is my mask, its actually better looking then I am for real......

When they settle down, before I offered them a treat I said to the adults...... 'Ive made treats for the adults, cos you lot always miss out'.... oh my, the smiles and the words of fanks for thinking of them, as they reach out their hands to take a handmade truffle....... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Then the gagging and the gobbing out of the truffles and the laffs and the snorts as they realise they have been tricked by chocolate covered sprouts lmfao.... the funniest thing was the pure smiles of happieness with them thinking that someone had gone to time and effort to make homemade truffles just for the adults.....

Do you know it was just the funniest surreal thing ever to see them smiles turn to looks of horror and surprise and then laughter lmfao....

It was hard to get shots of them cos I was holding a plate of truffles and a skeleton and was wearing me mask LMFAO so the following photos aint to great but you will get the idea....

See the look of delight..

See the look of WTF.... these two were nibblers and nibbled instead of popping the whole thing in their mouths.... LOL

Someone taking a truffle for her and her friend (in the white on the left) she was so grateful and pleased that I had made truffles lmfao

The same friend gagging as she had popped the whole truffle in her mouth and had greedily started to munch LMFAO..... I so though she was going to throw up lol

they laffed and laffed and laffed and I think she might of been one of the adults that wet themselves LOL

You can clearly see the gagging reflex in this woman lmfao

This couple were me most favourite of the night, they laffed and laffed so much, I aint never seen them before around the village, but they said they were TOLD to come to my house if they wanted the best scare LOL

The chap laffed so hard that a bit of sprout came out of his nose and then he laffed some more LOL note in the womans hand the gagged up sprout, she was well to posh to just gob it out in the road like everyone else had LOL....they fanked me for the bestest trick EVER lmfao

See the little skeleton lad, thats 'just jack' he actually soiled his trousers LOL....mission complete *ha

All in all I think the adults had as much fun and laughter as the children did.... well the kids did after they got over the initial scare LOL.... I only took me mask off for one little nipper cos I though she was gonna have some sorta fit, and she screamed and screamed no matter how much the father told her it was only 'Mel' so I relented just the once LOL for health and safety grounds lmfao....

We got through over 100 truffle sprouts most of which were gobbed up into the road and which the birds the following morning had a great breakfast.......over 80 mini halloween fairycakes.... 16 mini mummy pizzas and about 20 mummy hotdogs plus about $20 worth of sweets.... and plates and plates of homemade chocolate bones which we made in moulds incase we ran out of sweets.....

Afterwards I felt a bit of a saddo that I did this mostly on me own, cos me lads all went to parties, what on earth must people think of me LOL

I do know that the following week we was up the pub at a fireworks and giant bonfire display (actually we got there an hour late so missed it) which we missed due to having the wrong time LOL, but was having a pint outside with the crowds of people afterwards, when 3 different people came up to us and said.... oh you must be the people in the funniest halloween house in the village, everyone is talking about it, you was the talk non stop in the pub before the display of fireworks.... LOL.....

Now, how on earth am I to top that for next year......

ok more then enough Twaddle for a cold damp wet Wednesday evening......I doubt anyone has read it anyways LOL

x

Jacob Da Jew...

2009-11-27T09:13:00.011Z

Ok.......... sorry I have not been around..... Ive been working every spare minute of the day...... cos Ive only got before and after schoolers at the moment, which aint enough to actually live on, Ive picked up a little at home job doing some crimbo wrapping for a company that supplies wrapped crimbo pressies to all the top notch grottos across the country, you know, the posh ones cos some of these pressies Ive wrapped at sorta like £20 pressies ($40), they all supply corporate companys with pressies for their workers childrens crimbo parties....... Ive wrapped over 3000 pressies over the past week or so, and its often meant not only wrapping all day but well into the early hours of the morning, making sure the orders are fullfilled...... BUT, tiz dosh.... and its something I can do at home, he said I could go into the company premises and do it, but to be honest, even though its a little slower doing it at home, cos you have to unload all the boxes etc and repack, I'd rather be on me own doing it at home, then at the company with strangers LOL...Ive never watched so much day time telly in me life LOL... Yesterday my little lounge was piled to the ceiling high with boxes LOL....... I dropped them off this morning at 5.45am when I dropped my Ben off to work...and I have to go and pick up another 1000 at 2 o'clock to do over the weekend.....looks like bleedin Santas grotto here lmfao....

I was so sick of wrapping books during the week.... they were beautiful childrens books though, that, in the 400 books I wrapped I thought it would be a nice thing to write a little note and slip into the front cover of a handfull of books...... the note read.... 'SANTA IS NOT REAL AND RUDOLPH THE REINDEER IS DEAD' .... think how much the parents of the children receiving those books will one day thank me, if has saved them the agony of telling their children the truth, I consider I did them a favour :)

I also wrapped over 200 Hannah Montana dolls..... 2 of which are now travelling up north to a corporate company sporting a tash and a beard.... think how happy 2 little girls will be with their 'butch Hannah' dolls :)

Anyways, enough of my rubbish..... I have so many stories stored in me head that I need to get down.... but this is just a short one (that will surprise Buff lol)....

During the weeks before Halloween (I will do me halloween story next week) there was lots of spookie sweets and things in the shops to buy for trick or treaters.... well, when I was in Sainsburys I happened across a little box of 'body parts' and even though my lads are grown I still cant get out of the habit of treating them to sweets every so often.....

Well, I gave our Sam and Jacob a box of these body part jellies.....they was right proper good LOL........ Sam (he is 19 lol) thought they was well funny.... and whilst sitting on the computer he made a little face out of them.....and then decided it looked like a 'jewish person' and as he is always doodling whilst on the computer, he also doodled a picture to go with the jelly body parts......

This is our Sam's scribblings lol..... (sorry I cant seem to turn the picture around) bloody blogger....

As you can see the jelly body parts are quite life like HAHAHAHAHA

So, let me explain about 'Jacob Da Jew' part...... you see, our Jacobs initials equate to the word JEW.... JACOB ETHAN WILL--S... so for since as long as I can remember sometimes he is referred to as Jacob Da Jew :).... hence when Sam drew a jewish person he named it Jacob LOL

Sam showed me the picture and we all had a giggle about it, then I forgot all about it..... until a couple of days later when our Sam said 'mum, wheres that envelope that was on the side that I had to post'....... oh, Ive posted it, I say....... OH SHIT says Sam and then bursts out laffing so hard that I nearly had to man bitch slap him to bring him back to earth LMFAO.....oh my god he kept saying over and over again.... I was gonna put it in a different envelope he says....... no need I said, it a had a frankmark on it so it meant you didnt have to buy a stamp......... BUT YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HE SAID........

As you can see, the envelope was going to a fairly important place HAHAHAHAHA

What? I said... What?..... oh mum our Sam says the 'Jacob Da Jew' drawing was on the back of THAT envelope, and you've posted it off....

With that we all burst out laffing, so much so that I think a little bit of wee came out....

A few days later Sam got a phone call from the Job Centre.....hahahaha the woman says, your drawing on the back of your application made our office staff's day.... we have passed it around all the departments, but Im afraid to say we do not have an opening on the job front for a RABBI...... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Sometimes my Sam so creases me up..... I do not know where he gets his sense of humour from..... it certainly aint from his father LMFAO....

Ok, enough Twaddle for today, just breaking myself back in slowly....

Hope you are all well, Im sorry for still being such a slagbag emailer, I promise to catch up soon..

know you are loved......

x

This Is How...

2009-11-05T16:51:00.002Z

This is how Ive felt of late, since the court case....... totally overwhelmed with things...... the injustice of justice aye... I cant explain as yet,

A little no one in a huge sea of life.... someone that dont count in the big plan.....

This past month has been a whirlwind of solicitors and hospital and physio and talks with me consultant (surgeon), and trying to keep our heads above water cos only working part time so finacially in the shit LOL ..... and ups and downs......

So much to get down on paper, yet Im a very private person.....

Anways, I typed a long long post like I am known to do, but Ive just deleted it... I find it hard to share somethings, things that hurt me deep inside.... so for now, I will leave it at that......

Hey Buff aint that just the shortest post Ive even done LOL..

Fanks for all your loverly comments of love and concern in my previous post.... every time I read them I almost brings me to me knees with overwhelming love....

I just wanted/needed to put this out there, I know Ive been a slagbag with me emails and comments and have not really even been blobbing around... just the odd little comment on facebook, thats been me lot of late.... and Im sorry....

I have so many stories in my head that I need to get down on paper for me lads to read one day.... and Ive missed you all..... but, Im back on track now.... Ive hit the floor and bounced back higher.....

Its Guy Fawkes/Bonfire Night tonight and Im just now off to our Scout Hut to help with the arrangements and things for our fireworks display, which attracts thousands of village people..... hence this short post now....

Maybe I'll explain more another time, but you just have to remember Im quite a private person....

know you are loved....

x

Be Back Real Soon.... Proper Back An All LOL

2009-09-30T10:45:00.017Z

Ok.... I know I have let this place go to rack and ruin.... its not that I wanted to.. and there is way to much to explain as to why I aint been around everyones blobs much.... Im fighting for survival here in more ways then one.... need to get next Monday and court out of the way and maybe things will level out, if it all goes tits up then I could well be imprison for how I will deal with the offending party LOL....

So, you might have to start baking cakes and putting files in the middle of them.... GoFigure you might have to get over here I aint good in court lmfao....

Im hobbling much better now, still aint right by any stretch of the imagination, and still having physio twice a week which leaves me totally knackered, but it must be done if I stand a chance of getting any of the life back that I so crave...

I did have a nasty fall a few weeks back that scared the shit not only out of me but out of me physios, and it did put me back a bit, I was lucky to get away with it, but get away I bloody did, it could of mean two broken legs instead of the bruises arse and skinned hip that I ended up with, but it sure as hell shook me up big time..

Seriously though.... as one thing has been piled on my shoulders to deal with, more has been placed wobbly on the top.... so instead of coming in here and moaning and whining, I thought it best just to keep meself to meself and try as best I can to suss and sort the spoils of life out on me own like Ive always had to...

That dont mean to say I aint missed you all like crazy.... but Im living in a crazy timespan and if I cant suss it out then I will go under....

I have so many stories in my head that need to be written....

Anyways.... I'll leave you until next week with a few photos of the colours in me little garden....

I LOVE daisy plants with a passion..

This little Hibiscus bush I love, its more blue then it looks in the photo.....blue plants and purple plants I love more then any other colour... they make my heart sing.. and blue delphiniums are my utmost love..

A new little Mallow Shrub I bought back in the spring, it has the most delicate pale pink flowers, and even though I dont do pink, I love pink flowers in me garden lol..oh and me pink shoes, and scales and and and.... bugger, maybe Im a suppressed pink lover afterall lmfao

Sunflower in me garden, sunflowers are the only yellow plants I allow in my garden in the summer... to me yellow is for the spring.... I know I know crazy as shit right lol

I do not know what this long dangly plant is and its neither pink nor orange and I dont really like the colour, but it insists in flowering for months in my little garden so I think its unfair just cos I dont like it to dig the bugger up lol

This is a new delphinium which I got back in the spring and so didnt think it would flower this year, but it did, be it only one spike tall and thin, I think it flowered to make me smile...

If I had a big open garden I would have wide open flower beds just filled with every colour delphinium one could think of..... sigh.... but alas I dont lol - when I use to own a plant nursery with my tosser X we would grown thousands of pots of delphiniums each year to sell at the country shows.... I miss those days, NOT HIM but those days of growing and all the great shows, I loved interacting with the people whereas he hated that lol.... he was an amazing grower, I will give him that much, but that was all he was LMFAO...

I love this little bright pink alpine that I planted in the little hole in our stone front wall.... we use to grow over a 100 varieties of alpines.. thats what we specialised in... Alpines and Perennials.... we found such a gap in the market for top quality A and Ps....

Hey, maybe I could move to the States and get a job in a garden centre LOL.... I would be an asset lmfao...

See, blue again lol

This Victoria comes up without fail year after year... the only red plant in my garden this year, all me wicker hanging baskets were pinks, mauves, purples and white....

Oh my I have such a funny story about me twat neighbour and his red plant peeping over the fence, but I'll save that for another day lol

Ok, before I bore you to tears, one last photo, I picked the little sunflowers for me jug on me kitchen table, they was the little side flowers on me tall sunflowers, and they looked so pretty on our table...

Without my little garden, my lads, me cats, me chickens, me blob maties and a tiny few special maties here.... I would not of got through the summer...well, I would of, but I might not of come out sane LOL - but Autumn will a new beginning in so many ways for me..... Im making huge decisions in the coming months and its scarey on me own to be doing them.... but do them I must...

Anyone wanna adopt me LOL so I dont have to do this alone lmfao...

More then enough Twaddle for a Wednesday afternoon....

Know you are loved..... give me a few days to get back on track and I'll be back with you... then ya will be moaning when Im back proper LOL..

x

Happy Bloody Birthday To Me....

2009-09-19T22:48:00.005Z

Ok........19 September and its my birthday.....

What a shit fucking year its been....... I wouldnt wish my life as it is at the moment on my worse enermy..... but even with all that, along the way Ive met some amazing people...and the most amazing blob friends..... thank you for being so dam amazing.... yes, I mean you....

Ive leant so much from so many angles.... about people, people I trusted and people I have never met...... both have surprised me beyond measure..

Lets see what this coming year has install for me, whatever it is, except for death, it cant be any bloody worse......

On saying all that, Ive had the most loverly of days with my lads, a day filled with love and laughter and good food and cake and wine and more laughter and pressies, from near and far........

Gumbies, know I love you with all my heart......

Iggy, you continue to amaze me with your kindness and gentle words.....with your little band of merry blobbers....

know you are all loved...

x

First Proper Trip Out - Trouble On A Bike

2009-09-03T09:09:00.020Z

Ok....... I know, I know its been a while....... but if you was where I was right now you might understand.... on top of all the shit I already am carrying with trying to recover from all these surgeries in the past year, life threw me such a curveball this past month....

People have shit on me big time.... so much so that my house is on the line and Im trying as best I can to keep our heads above water whilst doing the doggie paddle...

Anyways, enough of my shit....... Im not gonna do the last installment of me hospital visit LOL well not yet.... Ive had enough of hospitals and all that nonsense, maybe I will do that last part in a few weeks.... need to get it down for me lads, but not now.....

Im doing okay, sorta.... still having physio twice a week which is knackering at the best of times.... Im sorta walking if you can call it that with no crutches now.... though very vulvernable and a bit wobbly especially on uneven ground....... Ive been driving for a couple of weeks now, which has given me a bit of freedom.....

Got kids this week, just as holiday and sickness cover.... dont have much work when schools go back next week, just me before and after schoolers, which wont keep the wolfs from the door...... basically Im stuffed for being a good person, Im stuffed for having surgery, Im stuffed for believing that people besides myself had morals and kept to promises, Im stuffed in being a genuine caring loving person..... maybe I should turn into a shitbag, a nasty piece of work, someone that dont give a dam, someone that dont put others first, someone that dont give a stuff....... cos, its taken me all this time to realise, that most people are just out for themselves and they even stuff ya when ya most vulnerable, they stuff ya cos someone having major surgery just dont fit in with their fucking holiday plans......

So, Ive not been Twaddling, Ive sat often with the page open and just couldnt bring myself to Twaddle.... and whilst sitting here Ive thought of all the wonderful friends and people I have meet through this blob and through other blobs, people I have never meet that have sent well wishes and cards and gifts, most of which I so dont deserve.... people that know me probably better then most people here.... people that I have grown so fond of over my time on Twaddle... people I have come to love..... so I fank you all for your well wishes and your beautiful cards and the little gifts, all of which lifted my spirits when I was at such a loss at to human nature and shithead people.... you restored my faith in people..... there are good out there besides those that only take for themselves...... so I fank you all from the bottom of my heart.... I would say soul, but that still aint come back to me yet LOL

But today Im gonna Twaddle, I need to...... but, not about hospitals and shithead people and being stuffed by unmoral nasty pieces of shit LOL

Ok, so we aint had a summer, not really, just odd sunny days, no long hot summer days here..... I take it as a sign, thats 2 years on the trot after major surgery that the summer has left us.... 2 years on the trot that people I loved and trusted have shit on me...... so its a sign.... a sign that maybe Im at fault....maybe by being the person I am, it somehow gives people permission to use and abuse 'me'....... I need to learn from what has happened and not change the person I am, but be strong in the belief that who I am is okay, its who Im suppose to be....anyways once again Im off track LOL soooooooo.....

A couple of weeks ago, after not being out of the house except for hospital and doctors appointments (and no, maties aint offered to come and take me out or anything..... fuck em aye) being stuck in the house for over 3 months aint been fun.... also with no money cos Im self employed, its been difficult.... Ive barely kept me sanity LOL... but a few weeks ago, I told me physio...... sod it, Im driving, he gave me a few lessons in the carpark at the hospital and I was ready to go, with, Mel only really drive when you have to LOL..... oh shut it nick....

We had a sunny Sunday a few weeks back so I said to me lads.... ok, lets go to the pub, our little favourite pub, right on the waters edge of the harbour.... lets go get something to eat.... lets go bleeding mental and treat ourselves LOL (you see both my Ben and Sam are out of work, due to redundancies and in England unlike in America dole money is pennies)..... I rarely treat myself, and I have maties that eat out 2-3 times a week, not just once in a blue moon like I do LOL....

Our Tom was poorly so that just left me, Ben, Sam and Jacob.... sod it, I said, I have the last 30 quid in me purse me might as well go down with a smile and a nice memory LOL

So off to Hayling we went, it was strange driving...... Sam couldnt drive my car you see, he aint insured, and his car has been off the road for months..... Ben couldnt drive my car cos he is banned for 2 years LOL (long story)... and of course at 16 Jacob is to young..... anyways, it was fine, sorta LOL it was just nice to get out..... I was like an inmate that had been on day release LOL..... oh there was a world outside the 4 walls of my house.... I actually saw real people out and about lmfao.... how bloody pathetic aye lol

The Ferryboat is a pub on the Western tip of Hayling Island, Ive talked about it here before.... there is one little road down to the pub, not to wide so if there are people on bikes you have to go way slow until there is a break in the traffic coming the other way before one can over take the bikes......

And bikes there was on that sunday a few weeks back..... the road only leads to the pub and the beach..... anyways...... we was stuck behind 2 bikes that were riding side by side (how rude) instead of them riding single file cos the road was narrow.... and cars coming the other way made it difficult for us to try and pass without knocking the tossers into the hedge, and believe me, it was in my head lol.....

My Sam said, beep the horn mum..... no Sam its ok, we will wait.... after 4-5 minutes of crawling behind these ignorant gits lol... there was a break in the cars and bikes coming the other way so I had room to overtake these bikes in front of us..... oh my goodness to dam funny...... as we pulled level with them my Sam reached over and beeped me horn LMFAO..... the bloke on the bike began waving his fist and mouthing something at us.... to dam funny...... and as we pulled level his face was a picture of anger LOL.... we was in fits of giggles by now, and boys being boys my Sam made the 'wanker sign' at him out the side window at the bloke for being such a tosser LOL..... we drove off with visions of him in the mirror waving his fist and shouting things we couldnt hear....... blimey, talk about 'bike rage' LOL all we did was beep the horn, and he shouldnt of been so rude as to ride side by side on a narrow road....

So we get to the pub, there is no way I was gonna walk across the carpark and across the eating area with me crutches.... so for the first time I tried to walk without them LOL..... bit of a mistake lmfao..... but, oh well..... I kept saying I WILL NOT BE A CRIMPLE I WILL NOT BE A CRIMPLE....

We ordered some drinks and our meals..... and hobbled outside to sit in the sunshine on one of the benches on the back terrace overlooking the sea..... as we was talking we mentioned the tosser bike rider and then we began to giggle cos I said...... he was riding the same way as us, that means one thing...... OMG... that means he HAS to be coming to this pub LMFAO...... to dam funny, and with that as we looked across the crowds of people sitting eating their supper, there with a face as red as a beetroot and a face like a smacked arse...... came TOSSER BIKE MAN and he was heading straight for us hahahahahaha...

He was pushing his bike through all the tables (how rude) his face was like thunder..... we were so childish, we started to giggle..... he stood at the end of our table..... hello I said....... HELLO he bellowed........ which started me off laffing again....... I COULD OF HAD A HEART ATTACK he said....... I beg your pardon I said........ he repeated himself.... my Ben who just wont take no nonsense off anyone, just said...... go away little man....tiz ok Ben I said, let the little man explain...... continue I said.... my face was making all funny shapes trying no to laff.... you beeped your horn and I could of had a heart attack he repeated...... oh, I said, not being funny or nuffin I says, but if you are that weak of heart maybe you just shouldnt be riding a bike along a road with traffic that might beep you if you are not riding correctly, cos after all, YOU could of caused an accident if you had fallen off cos of a heart attack and I might of run ya little head over, now please, we are trying to enjoy a nice drink, I suggest you just take you bike and go calm down somewhere....

Steam, I swear I saw steam coming out of his ears...he just wouldnt let sleeping dogs lie, he actually banged his fist on our table and said........HOW DARE YOU BEEP YOUR HORN AT ME........ I looked at all 3 of me lads who were now wide eyed in total disbelief at this bloke........ I could see now that my Ben was a little, how shall we say.... peeved LOL...... please dont talk to my mum like that matie, not if you dont wanna end up in that there water with ya bike on top of ya for good measure....... which now started me giggling again......... you have to rememeber this is my FIRST trip out into the human world after months stuck in the house LOL...... the bloke just wouldnt drop it...... DONT LAFF he said..... and looking straight at Ben he said, and I would like to see you try and throw me in the water you little boy.....now, my Ben is far from little, and he is a bit of a scrapper when push comes to shove.... and unlike his mother he has a bit of a short fuse when people are pissing him off for no justifable reason.... my Ben is well bloody hard LOL and aint scared of no man, let along a jumped up tosser on a bike.....

Now the standard joke amongst me and me lads is that when we are confronted by a situation that needs delicate handling but looks like it might get nasty is this......... I always say..... SHOW HIM/THEM YA TATTOOs lmfao....... to dam funny.... ya see once, my tosser X was having a bit of a todo with someone and he said..... 'I aint scared of you, I have tattoos' LMFAO hahahah I have no idea if that was suppose to scare someone, but its something thats stuck with me now forever, so in situations that arise such as now, I always try and break the ice with.....'show him ya tattoos'.... you so probably wont get that but to us it sends us into fits of uncontrolable giggles.... the bloke stopped speaking mid yell.... blank look..... yeah I said, you had better not mess with us Wil...'s we have tattoos, and with that I stick out me leg and pull me jeans up and show me little leaping frog tattoo..... there, now ya scared aint ya I said...... Sam began rolling up his sleeve to get to his tattoo.....

Well, this bloke just went balistic....the table next to us had heard the whole conversation and were in fits of giggles.... the whole pub terrace was in silence listening LOL....... he just wouldnt let it go......... so in the end my Ben just stood up and said (he was actually now getting right annoyed)...... ok matie, I suggest you just go NOW or I will not be held responsible for my actions and I just hope and pray that you can swim.... I just say in a gentle quiet voice, sorry matie but I think you picked on the wrong table, a table full of 'Wil...'s' aint to be messed with, I suppose you should consider yourself lucky that our Tom is not here, cos this conversation wouldnt even be happening now, you would be floating in that there sea.... now, before I really loose me rag with ya, I suggest ya bugger off over there and get yourself a drink and think about anger management classes..... my Ben then takes one step towards him and he actually runs with his bike across the terrace and props his bike up against the pub wall and storms into the pub with his wifey in tow.....

This is our Ben :) now he aint scarey is he LOL

I know I know, we shouldnt of wound him up...... but if you had been there is was just the funniest ever....... we giggled like silly kids and even discussed about our Jacob sneaking across the terrace to the blokes bike and letting his tyres down LOL

Our Sam, I think that hat is glued to his head lol....

I suppose you just had to be there, but I laffed and laffed so much, it did me the power of good....

Anyways, I love this old pub, even with its extensions over the years, ya see, just across the harbour mouth of the Portsmouth side is where I was born, Milton Locks was where me parents lived and as a young married couple my father and mother would sail their boat across the harbour to the Ferryboat Inn and spend time there and then sail back...... when we kids were older our parents would often (they had moved by then and sold the boat) drive down to Hayling and this pub on the beach and spend time on the beach and in the pub...... just a few good memories from my childhood, and maybe thats why I have always taken my lads there...... who knows, maybe just trying to capture a few odd good childhood memories.....

So, anyways....... there is a sea wall that runs along the back terrace of the pub, the channel of water is to dangerous for swimming cos of the very strong tidal current, it would drag ya out to sea before anyone had a change to throw a life line, but there are always jetskiers there and little speed boats and of course the little ferry that goes across to Eastney end of Portsmouth and to which the pub gets its name.....

Wondering if its possible to love another human as much as I love this child..it looks like he is standing on the edge of the beach but there is a 6 foot drop behind him LOL

Now my Jacob, you know the one that is into 'free running' and doing flips off things, well, the seawall was just to much of a temptation for him.... and I have to so bite my tongue and not tell him to stop it when he does these things.......

Whatcha reckon mum, he says, ya reckon I could flip off there onto the beach below..... yes love I say, so there is no need to do it right LOL...... WRONG...

I know the seawall is only about 5-6 foot high, but still, Im his mother for gawds sake..

And then to make his mother (me) fret even more, he does it with his hands in his pockets LOL

Aint my baby just gorgeous lol....... and yes, one of those pints is his.... and I know he is only just 16..... but it was hot and the lager was cold and it was better that he has a pint with his mother then sneaks up the woods with a bottle of cider like so many of his maties do lol..... oh shut it....

Even though my Sam is an extreme skateboarder he stands in awe at our Jacob and his flipping ability to just flip off anything and everything....... Sam decided to lay on the beach below the seawall and try and take a photo of his brother as he flipped over him LOL..

This is the view one would of got if ya was sunbathing on the beach and Jacob flipped over ya head lmfao.....

Oh this photo so made me laff....... as Jacob peered over the wall at me after doing a flip, the angle of the photo just looked so funny, it looked like he was just a head on the beer glass.... you know, like 'the head' on a beer lmfao

aint that just the strangest photo......

As you can see by the time we had finished eating the sun was setting... this is a wonderful place..... and in the winter when the wind is whipping up a storm its a great place to sit inside the pub over looking the sea with the wind and rain battering the windows, whilst its all snug inside..... one day I will get to share it and my memories with someone.... maybe aye....

I took one last photo before the light got to bad for my crap camera..... and this I think is the bestest shot...... even with me crap camera...

This lad shows no fear....... I suspect soon there will be more trips to the hospital......

As we made ready to leave we realised the 'bike man' was nowhere to been seen and his bike which was against the pub wall had disappeared..... I hobbled back across the terrace towards the car, yes, hobbling like a crimple..... and I felt happy to of been out of the house and to spend time with me lads and to laff until my sides ached...... and to realise, that maybe after meeting the 'crazy bike man' just maybe, my family aint as crazy as I often think lol

We headed back down the narrow road, happy and contented....... OMG..... could it be, there in the distance...... please say it aint so....... it only bloody well was, in the gloom, we could just make out a couple of bikes riding side by side down the narrow road.... in the gloomy light it was hard to make them out until we came right up behind them...... omg IT WAS THEM lol the crazy bike man, had he learnt nuffin this afternoon LMFAO..... it was just to tempting to let go....... so I drove up next to him and me lad wound the window down LOL...... hello again I say.... you really should have lights on your bike at this time of night, I could of knocked you off I could hardly see you..... F*CK OFF he said......... how very rude.......... we giggled and laffed all the way home...... :)

ok, I know, long winded and boring and all that stuff for a Saturday afternoon....... but, I aint bovvered..... its just nice to be back on Twaddle, no matter what me problems are, Ive missed twaddling and most of all.... Ive missed you all.....

Im doing ok, really, very frustrated about me re-couping though, but thats maybe for another twaddle day......

know you are loved..

x

Blood Bones Guts And Funny Surgeons.... Part III (Oh Hush GoFigure)

2009-07-26T18:10:00.027Z

Ok........ tiz been a while, I know, but have sorta kept meself to meself of late, just trying to do things right, now thats a first for me lol

Before I show ya the blood and guts post, I'll quickly say whats been going on this past couple of weeks....

I had me consultant a week and a half ago, I had to go to the other hospital in town, what a cock up that was with hospital transport again lol, they had to fork out the cost of a taxi there and back for me cos they cocked up.... suited me just fine fanks very much lol

Anyways, I had 4-5 Xrays, only to discover that the 4 inch break in me femur as yet even after 6 weeks has not knitted together as it should of.... I have been non weighbearing as much as possible over the past 6 weeks, but just sometimes its been impossible..... anyways, me consultant was a little concerned, the break though had not got any bigger it had just not knitted, and the hole where they took the acl/pcl reconstruction screws out was also gapping like a toothless old hag.....

So, MrD me consultant gave me options.....

1. Further surgery to have a plate and little screws placed over the break and gapping hole in me femur.....

2. No weightbearing for a further 6 weeks, but be admitted to hospital to immobilise me leg so the break cant move but have the physios come in to keep the robot knee joint moving so it dont scar over like last years one and stop bending....

3. Start partial weighbearing and work up to full weightbearing under strict physio at the hospital 3-4 times a week, and hope that the way the new knee joint is in place, the weight of the joint is dispersed right across the femur spreading out the force of weight and hope that cos of that, the break in the femur wont continue to split up me femur, and see what happens.....SEE WHAT BLOODY HAPPENS lol......

The first 2 options are not an option for me, as the 14 inch wound scar is now fairly clean and healing nicely and the infection is very minor still, to open me up again and fiddle around, well, nope..... I aint doing that....

The second option aint happening either, I cant not be here for 6 weeks as much as I actually could do with the rest LOL....

So...... after much discussion I/we have plumped for option 3.... I do not know who is more scared and worried, me or nick me physio lol.......if we get this wrong or I fall then Im buggered cos the femur will crack right up to me bum...... so you can imagine how careful I am being, and 4 trips to the hospital physio gym this week have been like a trip to hell LOL.... a week and a bit on and things seem to be going ok.... very painful, but no falls, Im still on crutches but trying to use them mainly for balance.......but Im wicked on them now.... I did nearly come a cropper yesterday though, but the least said about that the better LOL suffice to say I have a graze about 5 inches down the side of me face and the wall in the kitchen is sporting bits of my skin LOL

Im great in meself though, and very positive...... just dam bloody bored LOL.... its ok having time off work when one is normal and with dosh in ones pocket, but Im neither so its a tad frustrating.... hence why Ive been a little quiet, mainly cos after the hospital trips and what with trying to deal with me solicitor, its left me knackered.....

Anyways enough of all that bollocks.... I need to get this last part down on paper as a record of events, so one day me lads might realise some of the horrendous things Ive been through lol......... they refuse to look at the photos, said they dont wanna see, cos it makes them feel sick LOL

So, after a night tossing and turning and getting hardly any sleep, I awoke with the sound of the tea trolley doing its early morning rounds....... no tea for me, today was the day..... please lordie dont let me be like last years operation, please give me a break and let things be good.....

Me consultant did his rounds about 8ish... this is MrC the one that took pity on me and added me to his list lol..... he introduced himself, and shook my hand with the words...'you are quite a celebrity, fanks to nurse Lisa and MrN, after hearing from them both, Im very pleased to have you on my list for today, it will be about teatime, but Im told you havent eaten or drunk properly for days, so Im making an exception, you are allowed to drink water throughout the day, we cant have to dehyradated before we even start, but just water, nuffin else - Ive studied your notes from MrD and realise we face a few problems cos of the acl/pcl reconstruction a few years ago, but you my dear are going to have to put your trust in me and let me do the best I can for you in whatever circumstances that might arise.... any questions Mel'?....

ok, I says, just a couple....I know I will be having the spinal block right? and last year I also had a bit of sedation which was like a nice drunk feeling, so I was awake but not really truely with it right? well this year, I do NOT want any sedation whatsoever, just the spinal, I want to be fully awake cos last year I think it might of been a reaction to the sedation what made me really poorly the first few days after surgery, and thats when things started to go to pot - well he says, its not very pleasant not to have some sedation, you will be fully aware of every word spoken and even though you will not feel any pain you will feel the hammering and drilling and your body moving as we bang and drill etc.... but I NEED to hear whats going on, and I so dont wanna be poorly like last time..... ok, he said, its your shot, but if you feel its all to much then let us know and we will sedate you.... you will be the first that will of only had the spinal, you are crazy LOL......

Anything else, he asks...... yes, can I take me camera into theatre and could one of the theatre staff take photos for me, please........ well he says that also is a first, well, I says, last year MrD let me take the camera and he captured great photos, now you cant let him outdo you can ya? - with that he let out a huge laff LOL...... oh my he says, I can see why MrN and Lisa shout your corner for you, you certainly are not the run of the mill patient LOL....they sure were correct about you - ok he says, its a deal, if MrD can have photos of your op then we to must out do him with better photos lmfao.....

Oh, and one more thing, no Auntie Morris I says, he blanked stared at me and so I had to explain all about Auntie Morris and me Auntie Freda's wee bag LOL.... I dont think many patients talk to these top surgeons like I do LOL.... he just smiled and said, no Auntie Morris then - see you around teatime he said.... and with that he walked away chuckling.....

So I had the rest of the day to worry and read to Violet and get things from the shop for others....I had to keep telling meself that this would not go like last years, that was just unlucky, this is different, things will be ok... they had to be....

A little before teatime the call came up that I was to be got ready and someone would be up to collect me to take me to theatre, all systems were go, and the call said, tell Mel not to forget her camera LMFAO hahahahaha

This is one of the theatre nurses, I cant remember what I said to her but she is finding something wellabit funny LOL...I will admit all through the op, problems and all, we laffed and laffed...... note the time on the clock on the back wall.. 4.20pm just past teatime..... I didnt get back to the ward until a little before 9pm.... cripes, things did get complicated LOL

They wheeled me bed down to theatre where I had to hop over onto the operating table and sit on the edge with me feet on a chair and curl me backbone so that they could insert the spinal.... so there I sat.... with one of the theatre nurses infront of me holding me hands incase I fell off the table LOL.... cold spray they said and then you will feel a little prick.... its been a while I said, since Ive had a little prick...... I NEED to learn to keep me mouth shut LOL.....well I could feel the anthestist running his fingers down my spine, and then a sharp prick and with that me left leg shot out and kicked the nurse who was holding me hands right in the shins LOL........ oh my says the anthestist, thats not quite the right gap LOL..... I asked if he had done this before or if he had just wandered in off the street.... with that he was standing in front of me and said, its not me doing it LOL Im teaching today.... blimey, they had only let a student loose on me spinal column lol..... 3 attempts later and 2 kicks at the nurse and they finally got the spinal in.... I had no control over the leg movement, it was the strangest thing ever, its where the needle had hit part of the spinal cord nerves and it must of been the ones that go to me left leg....

we did laff but my back was like a dot-to-dot of holes lol - I did think to meself..... oh shit, here we go again....

I was asked if I was sure I wanted to be fully awake, I said yep, but if things went wrong I didnt wanna hear them say 'we are losing her' or 'my what a fat arse' LOL.... MrC just stared at me and shook his head smiling lol

Ok, he says from behind the screen, lets start, are you ready Mel..... can you take the screen down so I can see, I says..... nope he says we so aint doing that LOL....ok I says but you have to talk to me and tell me whats going on, I dont wanna hear like on the hospital telly programme in surgery where ya discuss who is shagging who and which doctor is cheating on his wife LOL..... he pops his head over the screen and says, dam, which telly hospital programme do you watch LOL...

Ok Mel just tell me if you feel anything, you shouldnt but let me know ok.. first cut.... I asked him to give me a running commentary lol again he said that would be a first, Im glad I had MrC he was not so straight laced as MrD, and the other top surgeon that was MrC's sidekick was wellabit funny.... There was 8 people in theatre plus 2 students and me..... I didnt realise there would be so many, just thought it would be 4 or 5 people....

This was the first cut, little was I to know they then cut much longer and higher, 14 inches in all.... I think my days of modeling are over lol

Throughout both the surgeons so made me laff, it was not until after I put the photos on me computer that I realised how they were both playing to the camera lol.... see the thumbs up in the above photo LOL to dam funny

ok.... be warned gross photos to follow.....

Now this is just the funniest photo ever, it must be the angle or something cos my knee looks like the size of a bloody head LOL...... you can see how much bigger the opening is in the above photo... its right proper wide cos they are pulling it apart with clamps....

No wonder one is very sore after LOL

Just some of the many instruments used during the operation, and yes thats a drill just like I have in me tool bag in me shed LOL....

See the bits of me femur in the little pot, its a strange thought that they cut the end of ones femur off and chistle it out like a dovetail joint to get the metal knee to sit straight...... and then part of it is shoved up the bonemarrow part of the bone....the thing in the photo is the bit that measures where the dovetail will go lol

This has just gotta be the bestest photo ever, these are two top orthopedic surgeons doing a complicated operation on 'me' LMFAO and they have time to take a bow, you can certainly tell they aint never had a camera in theatre before.... I just so love this photo.... and all the time Im chatting away behind the sheet LOL see, it just goes to prove these top surgeon are really just the same as everyone else lol - see the bowl of me bones lol

I did ask if I could have some of the bones and the screws but I was not allowed cos they were not sterile.... I so wanted to make a necklace out of the bones lol

Yep, they really stand on a little stool and put all their force behind hammering..... this is the part where I heard me consultant say 'oh shit' and whats that suppose to mean I say.... well he says, remember how I told you that cos of the weakness where the screws would be out from the acl reconstruction, and how the bone might sheer off..... well, he said, it didnt...... phew I said.... it didnt sheer off he said but I broke it instead...... oh my I says..... well, lets just call it a lucky break then aye?.... with that he comes around my side of the sheet and just bursts out laffing, saying 'a lucky break lol'.... see to some it would of been devastating, but to me it was the best of the two evils... whats a 4 inch break when it could of been the whole bone sheered off ....

Even though the cut dont look it, it actually measures 14 inches from top to bottom...... see the new metal robot joint in place..... all me bits of femur and tibia are in a little bowl, probably going down to the kitchens to make a stew from LOL

That just left the closing up with staples... 46 altogether, he said it was the most he has ever used but with 14 inches to close up he had no choice.... I will admit the scar is horrendous, the bottom half aint to bad but the top half I think he must of done bloody blanket stitch on it lol.... but I say, scars are the roadmaps of ones life, and there aint much I can do about them.... and its not like anyone will ever see them but me.... no one would want me now anyways LOL

They had to be so very careful putting me back across onto my ward bed, cos of the broken femur they made sure things were smooth by having so many people to help LOL...... if you could see me face, I was rolling me eyes lol mainly cos I couldnt see what all the fuss was about cos I was painfree still and numb from me bum down.....

This was the portable Xray machine they had to send down to theatre to Xray the break in me femur before they would move me from recovery back to the ward.....

This is Francis on the right and another chap in recovery, Francis was beaming when he saw me, he remembered me from last year LOL.... they are trying to put me leg in a PMM passive movement machine, they dont usually use one until a few days after a knee op, but cos of all the problems with lack of bend last year, they put me on it straight away, not 10 minutes out of surgery LOL....Jebus just look at me huge cankles lol - see all the blood in the tubes, I told ya I was a bit of a bleeder..... they collected my blood in a bag and when I needed a blood transfusion the following day, they just used my own blood.... talk about recycling lol....

Proof I was alive and kicking LOL no flatlining for me....

That just left Francis to put the end of me bed back on before they whisked me off back to me ward....... you can see me little name tag on the bedend LOL.... see his beaming face.... we giggled like 2 school kids for the whole hour I was in recovery LOL...

They took me back to me ward a little before 9pm.... I know it was that time cos just as they got me settled in and me morphine drip thingy inplace, The Apprentice programme came on the little telly high up on the wall.....

Do you know it was the strangest of things..... last year when I came back to the ward I was so very very poorly.... for 3 days, really out of it...... but this year, it was as if I had just popped out somewhere fore a coffee and a cake..... I was not drowsy or sick or light headed or in pain.... it was just so odd...... even the ward sister and the ward doctor couldnt believe how 'normal' I was LOL..... everyone did hush though so I could watch the programme I had kept on about all day LOL you see, I had watched this programme for weeks and those that know The Apprentice will know how it grabs ya by the short and curlies and I was so worried I was gonna miss it LOL and it being the last but on in the series LOL..... so I sat and watched the telly straight from recovery, they had fixed me up with me morphine drip....

One is in control of ones own morphine, its impossible to overdose though lol cos ya can only get a blast every 6 minutes...... it was funny to watch in the coming days as others bashed their machines and clicked the buttons lol hoping they could get more....

As the telly programme finished around 10pm..... me leg had been in the PMM since coming out of surgery, it was to stay on all night... what it does is automatically bends ya leg for you as it sits cradled in the machine.... what with that and the pumps on me feet which keep the circulation going to save blood clots, I was wondering how the hell I would sleep...... but do you know what, within 5 minutes of The Apprentice programme on the telly finishing, I was out for the count.... I think my body had just given up the ghost, it had been a long stressful hard day with many complications..... so when the nurse went down to the kitchens to find me some sarnies to munch on, cos I had not eaten now for 5 days LOL.... well, when she came back with them.... I was away with the fairys.... dead to the world........ and thats how I was until 7am the following morning, I was still dead to the world and they had to wake me up....... bloody hell...... how different from last year....

Lets just see what was to be forthcoming in the days ahead......

ok.... way way to much twaddle for anyone to read.... but, its just me diary for me lads, so I aint bovvered if anyone read it or not.......but if ya did, I hope the photos were not to gross, I actually have another 30 or so and it was hard to choose which one to put on here......

Tiz a little past 10.30pm now, and I have hospital transport picking me up at just gone 8am tomorrow, so I should think about bed I suppose..... just wish I had a morphine drip now LOL.....

x

Smiles Are Contagious......

2009-07-12T09:21:00.005Z

Ok..... Well I spent a loverly couple of days back in hospital LOL.... I didnt feel to well on Wednesday, and even though a 'certain knobhead' referred to it as whining.... I truelly didnt feel to great.... and me knee was well swollen and hot and tender to touch and I was burning up.....

After chatting to me matie on the phone for a bit on Wednesday night not really remembering what we talked about, only remembering words of Stubborn and PigHeaded being thrown around lmfao.... I went to bed to awake the next day not really with it.... knowing I had to post a message to a knobhead on a certain blob sight, I then went back to bed..... lazy cow or what LOL..... well with no one here but me there was no need to get up and faff around..... well I awoke hours later with the phone ringing, but by the time I eventually got down the stairs it had stopped.... I replied to an email to a friend, for that I apoligies cos upon reading its back now it full of spelling mistakes and horrendous grammar, but please remember I had a temp of 103 and was not really in this world LOL....

The phone rang again and it was me physio to say he had sorted out the transport problems for the following day and he would see me then..... ok I said...... he asked if I was ok cos I sounded like poo (his words - charming aye LOL)... I went on to tell him actually I didnt feel to good and then explained about the swelling...... I remember hearing a huge intake of breath and I had visions of him shaking his head lol (people seem to do that alot around me lol)..... right, he said, Mel listen to me, I actually have a cancellation this afternoon so I will arrange transport and you can have that slot...... no Nick its ok, I dont feel up to it today, I'll stick with tomorrows appointment...... tough tittie he said, Im arranging it now.... be ready for 1.45 I MEAN IT....

Well when I get there thinking I was to have me physio and also thinking I dont know how Im gonna cope without passing out on the rower LOL he takes one look at me and said I looked like shit.... charming again right LOL.... Ive known this bloke for 6 years or so and he knows he has to talk to me a certain way lmfao..... well, the bloody trickster, I didnt have a physio appointment with him, he had made an appointment to see a consultant at the clinic cos he KNEW I was not well and wouldnt of gone meself without kicking and screaming lol...

So there and then they admitted me..... I cant I said, Ive got nuffin with me, no phone, no money, no bag, nuffin, me back door is open and me chickens are out and will miss me........ the consultant and young doctor just looked at me like I was deranged LOL.... I will put it down to the fever :).... but I was not given an option.....

So up to a ward with nuffin but what I was standing up in I went...... ya see, on Tuesday I was doing me exercises at home.... the wound on me leg is the biggest me physios have ever seen for a knee replacement, but they had to cut lower to dig the screws out from me acl/pcl reconstruction a few years back and then cut higher to fiddle around with the broken femur.... anyways, besides the 46 or so staples I had on the outside, apparently there was many stitches on the inside, and some of them had been put in a tad tight and had puckered and pulled the skin in making like big dimples.... well when I exercised I felt something tear inside and then part of me scar/wound opened up and began to seep....the tear I felt was some stitches either snapping or being pulled though the skin, it then felt right proper cold...... and that is where the problem started with infection lol...... but besides that apparently so they say I had a very high fever and was totally dehydrated LOL.....

So I spent a couple of days in the new hospital drugged up to the nines... with huge amounts of anti-biotics being pumped into a vein and fluids in another..... but now Im home...... well I had to come home to put me chickens away.... oh shut it, you dont understand.... I dont DO hospitals...

Things are looking good though right? lol..... I think the swelling is subsiding a little, and Im on anti-biotics so thats good right?.... me physio rings to check on me lol..... I do owe him a drink, I think he might of saved me from a fate worse then death....... dam this bloke reads me like a book lol.... he actually saved my life 6 years back, it was a very touch and go situation, so maybe I owe him a whole unopened bottle of drink LOL... and that is how he knows me like a book and knows how to talk to me to see sense, or how to trick me LOL

Ya see, cos Im prone to infection, remember last year... jebus.... sigh...... they will wait and see whats what on Tuesday (there was NO WAY I was staying in hospital until Tuesday).... and if things have not settled down to their satisfaction they will whip me in and open me up and have a good scrape around inside...... but, that aint gonna happen right? lol

I know I know, I should of listened to GoFigure's advice on Wednesday.....but alls well right lol..... and no I aint stubborn or pigheaded....... I just dont like making a fuss......

Im ok though, still smiling..... its just par for the course with me..... smooth aint a word in my life that seems to fit me LOL

Praise the lord for me sense of humour and friends that care.......... and praise the lord for smiling carrots...... hahahahahaha

I fixed me self something to eat..... I will admit I was feeling a little sorry for meself yesterday...... no one in the house but me.... (my Jacob was due home from camp that evening)...

I didnt want nuffin heavy to eat so I just steamed some veggies I found in the freezer.... which I LOVE with vinegar and mint sauce on.... oh shut it, its nice like that lol.....

I sat down at the table and looked at me food, and there smiling back at me was a happy little carrot lmfao....IT WAS A SIGN.... a bloody sign ... how can one not be moved by that happy little face.... everything is gonna be fine..... cos the carrot says so LMFAO....

and yes.... I did talk to him before I ate him.... he took one for the good of mankind LOL.... see, how low maintenance I am LOL..... see a little smiling carrot can make me so happy lmfao.... smiles ARE contagious..

Ok... enough Twaddle for an overcast Sunday morning......

ps - this was gonna be a tiny short post with just the photo and a few words, but you know me by now, right proper gobbie I am lol

WARNING - right proper gross photos in me next post.....

x

War And Peace (Oh Shut It GoFigure LOL) - Part II

2009-07-08T10:40:00.016Z

Ok, Im a little pissed off this morning, they forgot to send hospital transport out for me and I really needed to be there today for Nick to give me his opinion..... ya see, Ive woken up with quite a high temperature and over night me knee/leg has swollen to twice its already very swollen size and its hot and red and stiff as a board....... but I thought, its ok, hospital transport will be be around 10ish, me appointment was 11... I waited and waited, it didnt arrive.... I rang Nick me physio and told him it aint come and I so needed to see him today cos I was a tad stiff.... and NO I didnt tell him the rest lol....he said there are no spaces the rest of the day for me to come in and me next appointment is Friday, well, I will just go along for that, to late to do anything about the missed one today, except Nick did ring the transport office and bollock them.....

So Ive dosed meself up with double the strong meds in the hope that things will settle until me Friday appointment...... so before they kick in I thought I would stop GoFigure nagging me and shove up a quick post... before me head explodes and the sweat pouring off me floods the keyboard LOL

So...... I woke the following morning on the ward of 24 patients, unlike last year though it was not filled to overflowing with little elderly people, yes there was a fair quota of them but there was almost many that was around my age.... some woman next to be had her bunions done and a hammer toe straightened out (remind me NEVER to have me little hammer toe straightened - I would not do that for love nor money after seeing the pain this woman was in) - there was a wrist problem in and the various hips and two partial knees, and down the other end there was some elbows, this is an orthopedic ward after all..... it was strange waking up semi normal, well normal for me, you know, still able to get out of bed etc.....

I hadnt slept much though, not knowing what today was gonna bring........they wouldnt let me have tea or breakfast - just incase, they said....

Well remember the loverly nurse Lisa..... around 10ish she came to see me, my heart was in my mouth as she sat on me bed, I thought she would tell me that I had to go home and go back on MrD's list..... this is the nurse that most of yesterday had laffed and joked with me and eating chocolates and teased me cos I hadnt eaten and was not allowed to eat, she had the most wonderful sense of humour and under all that she was the most caring compassionate beautiful person....

Right she said, Mel, Ive been in since 7 this morning and my shift did not start til 8.... I grabbed todays theatre lists from all the surgeons that are here today to see if there was any cancellations etc..... she said after an hour of trawling through pages and pages of lists she couldnt make head nor tail of it..... so at 8.30 she went to the 'surgeons lounge' which is where all the surgeons on duty that day gather to discuss things and have breakfast and tea/coffee.... she said she had never been in there before but my case had touched her so much LOL..... she said she stood in the middle of the lounge and asked for quiet and then spilled my story... she told everything, about me and my job and life and struggles.... (jebus christ what was I a charity case lol) and explained what had gone down yesterday and if there was any chance that someone anyone would take me on their list today, even though there were a few complications...... she pleaded me case well LOL

When this nurse spoke my name in the lounge one Surgeon Nigel L-Bottom piped up and said, oh my its Mel, I did her acl/plc reconstruction a few years ago and started her off on this knee replacement journey a couple of years back but handed her over to someone more in tune with new technology, and get this, apparently he went on to say (no wonder me ears were burning lol) she is one of the nicest most geniene patients I have ever had on me file or met in over 30 years, even when she is real poorly and in pain she will light up the ward and everyone around her, she can make even the frailest most frightened patient feel special and bring a smile to those that most need it, despite her own problems.... someone needs to take her on today.. I would add her to my list but she is to young for me to do, she needs to be back hiking etc and got endless promises last year with the other knee, she is to young to be just pottering around and hobbling through life, someone NEEDS to get her back to full strength....

She would hate this photo of her lol..... she is not only a nurse but she was the ward sister.... she truely is in the correct job...

Oh my God, I said to Lisa, he so didnt say that.... she said he bloody did, he had me in tears she said, cos I know that you know Nigel and I know that Nigel sees through your hard outside shell, just like I do.....

Lisa then also said in the lounge, Mel so needs a break, she has had the most horrendous couple of year with these ops.... come on.... with that MrC who is actually a higher consultant/surgeon then my MrD said.... Dave knows about this right? this, passing Mel onto someone else, Lisa said yep and he is hoping to ring around today and try and fix one of you up with her..... so apparently MrC says, give me half and hour to go over her notes cos now Im intrigued with the woman LOL....... within half an hour he was back and said OK if Dave is ok with this I'll put her on me list, BUT it will not be today cos its a little complicated, but she will definetely be on me list for tomorrow.... tell Mel I PROMISE...... Lisa said, please MrC dont make empty promises she has had them for years.... he said, my word is my word, unless the building catches fire, Mel will be on my list for tomorrow, I will juggle around my time slots and tomorrow we will see what we can do for her.....

Dam girl she says, your bloody famous LOL - her smile was huge, she said she had NEVER done anything like that before LOL faced all the top surgeons on their own ground.... but she said she remembered me from last year and all the good I had done to those on the ward even though I was so very poorly LOL.... I was smiling and tears flowing at the same time, someone actually really cared about me and me plight, she had tears rolling down her face to, both were tears of joy and she said when Nigel had started saying those things about me to the other surgeons she said she KNEW it was meant to be... she went way beyond the call of duty..... she is an angel....she was my angel....

So, says Lisa, you aint going home today, the bed is still yours, think of today as a little holiday, go wander around the grounds of this 250 year old military hospital, go sit in the sunshine with a book, go hobble down to the waters edge.... but DONT go home (not that I could even get home from there LOL).. so thats what I did..... I was scared cos I really didnt want this operations cos of last year, but I was excited cos I had no choice but to have it done if I wanted any resemblence of a life back..... and guess what, even though they said I had missed breakfast they said I could still have lunch and they would ring down and get me a sarnie bought up, but, I declined, wasnt going down the Auntie Morris/Bedpan trail after I can come so far, they was not happy BUT I had to promise to at least DRINK DRINK DRINK today....

Ya see, this military hospital was due to close in a few weeks time, its been a hospital for the military for 250 years, they use to row the casualties down the creek to the dock and into the hospital, in and around the corridors of the hospital are wonderful old photos of staff and patients etc..... and as I love history I LOVE this place.... so wander I did...... the main building is HUGE and is built with 4 sides around a quad in the middle.... it is a listed building which means it has to be preserved as historical interest..... its not until you truely have the time to wonder the many many acre site that you get to breath in the history of the place.... all around the edge of the sight are beautiful 200 year old houses where the top surgeons would of lived and the naval captains etc.... I do not know what will become of these buildings as many of those are also listed.... that means you can change the insides but NOT the outsides, I expect the main part which is HUGE and on 3 levels plus basement will be made into luxury flats on the inside but the outside will remain as its beautiful self....

Just look at this entrance.... beautiful..

And this plague for those that died in the great war, there were other plagues around the place with those that had died in other wars to....

There were so many interesting (to a history nut) plagues and things scattered around the place....

And of course our union jack in the little rose garden, again with plagues with meanings and thats the old bell off of something or other LOL....

This is the looking through the doors under the first carved main entrance into the building I was in, just see how deep the building is - look at those 250 year old quarry tile floors and if you look real close you can see the old iron tram lines that are embeded in the tiles, well old or what... I was in me element.... maybe my cancelled op was a sign to breath and take in all the history of this place...

I spent much of me day sitting in the sunshine reading me book, I never usually have time for that, just lazing around doing nuffin.... and much of the time I spend running/hobbling up and down in the lift getting things for patients from the little navi shop.... newspapers and extra drinks and sweets and stuff..... throw me arms in the air, what am I a bloody servant I exclaimed once LOL...... I sat with a real old little lady called Violet who was not allowed out of bed and who had asked me if I could go and buy her a paper, when I bought it back for her she said 'I dont know why I wanted it cos my sight is so bad I cant read it' LOL you daft cow I said... so I spent the best part of an hour sitting on the chair next to Violet reading her the daily news...... she kept taking hold of me hand and rambling on about different stuff, what is it with people and me that they seem to spill their life stories out to me lol..... I think the paper was just a ploy and she just wanted someone to hold her scared hand and to chat to......... gawds sake.... she said her family had visited but they had just talked amongst themselves as if she was not even there, she said they was only after her money if she died lol so I said she could leave it to me if she wished LOL..... she said I had chatted to her more in that hour and had made her smile then her family had bothered to talk to her on their visits.... I said, cut the bastards out of ya will Violet and leave anything ya have to the Cats Home..... with which she laffed so hard the top set of her teeth shot out and landed on the covers of her bed....... oh my goodness I almost piddled meself laffing as did she lmfao...... the nurses had to come and see what the fuss was about..... they to started laffing.... when she had stopped laffing she said, just because Im old and cant see to well, it dont mean Im not a person with feelings and she squeezed me hand.... good job she was as blind as a bat and couldnt see me tears.... I just wanted to scoop her up and take her home to live with me LOL.... I wonder if she is good at ironing lmfao....

This was Ally that just couldnt stop laffing LOL she remembers me not only from last year but from 5 years back when Nigel L-Bottom had done me acl/pcl reconstruction.... I had no idea out of the hundreds and hundreds of patients since, why she remembered me LOL

When Violet dozed off for a nap and everyone on the ward had worn me ragged with running back and forth to the Navi shop, I took me book again and went and sat outside in the sunshine to read me book.....

This is looking across to the upper ward where I was and across the inner quad, its very sheltered there cos its enclosed on all 4 sides, cos it can get right proper windy in the grounds cos the hospital is right on the seashore....

It was amazing to think of all the Sailors that would of been treated in this hospital over the last 250 years, when medicine and treatment was still in its infancy.. the pain and suffering and the not really knowing, and without the technology of nowadays.....

This is looking the other way, you can just see the beautiful ancient water tower, aint it just gorgeous.... obviously it aint no water tower now, not sure what they use it for, but its my the military security entrance just as you come onto the sight.... its quite outstanding....

I didnt eat lunch nor dinner that evening, just sips of water... I sat in the telly room whilst everyone else had their supper... thoughts rushing through me head about tomorrow, fears cos of last year..... I had idled about the day, what a lazy cow I was LOL.... I sat and watched telly til 1 in the morning, knowing I wouldnt sleep.....someone keep popping their head around the door just to check I was ok.. of course I was, not a drop of blood in sight LOL..... Lisa came and said she was off and was not in tomorrow and good luck and that she would be thinking of me and would be back in the following day, big hugs and tears all round.... she said 'your okay you are Mel, crazy and mad, but loving and caring and alright, I bet you dont let many people see that' .... oh shut ya mouth I said LOL Im well ard ;)....

I crawled into bed just gone 1am knowing the last night of tucking me knees up and sleeping all curled up like I usually do with me blankie lmfao I tossed and turned.....

Lets just see what happens tomorrow, surely something would crop up to put a stick in the works...... something will go wrong, cos after all..... it always does where Im concerned.....

But lets hope that tomorrow was not empty promises like last year, I could do this alone again, no hand to hold.... tomorrow might be the first day of getting my hiking legs back and getting my life back on track for ME..... I so wish I had had someone to snuggle up to that night.... my pillow was wet with tears.... but I knew there would be no one there to wipe them away......

Tomorrow...... lets see what cock up would happen tomorrow lol

Happy now GoFigure? LMFAO ;) Im burning up now and I think I might go to bed for a little while...

Ok, to much waffling Twaddle.........

Know you are loved.....

x

If There Is A Cock-Up... My Name Will Be In There Somewhere...Part I

2009-07-02T20:05:00.009Z

Ok, Ive been home a little over 3 weeks, 3 hard, difficult weeks on so many levels, that is why Ive tried to keep meself to meself....

This will bore you to tears, its long winded, but I need to get this down on paper for me lads to oneday realise the shit I have to go through LOL...

Now the frustration and boredom and cabin fever have crept in and thats harder to deal with then the fear and the dam pain..... still no weight bearing until Ive seen me consultant in another fortnight then they will take things from there...

Ive been stuck in the house and the little garden for over 3 weeks mostly on me own, and except for my 3 weekly hospital appointments, for which they send out hospital transport for me, I aint seen another living soul besides me matie Wendy LOL - our Ben went off to Thailand and our Sam has been away most of the time with his maties, our Tom and his girlfriend are abroad on holiday, and Jacob finished compulsary school just 2 weeks after his 16th birthday so I let him go off with his maties, and he is off again next week on Bivi Camp in the New Forest.... but tomorrow he has his leavers Dinner and Dance which I think is like a doodle PROM, and the flash car I had arranged for him only yesterday let me down, so have been racking me drug induced brain today trying to sort something else out (I do not know why the other bloody mothers leave it to me to sort out, especially knowing me circumstances - tossers).... other times I would relish a bit of time on me own, if I was well and able to do things, but being totally on ones own under the circumstances I find meself in have weighed heavy on my soul...

So all in all Ive had a very difficult time of it.... ate nuffin but toast for over a week cos I couldnt stand to make anything, and then had no milk for tea for 3 days.... seems like most of me maties have been to bloody busy with life or just cant be arsed or bothered to help out, not that Ive asked, but they KNOW Ive a broken leg as well as me knee surgery.... so Ive struggled as best I could with what I could manage.... not suppose to go up the stairs but I have no choice, there is no way I can sleep downstairs... it takes me at least 15 minutes to get up the stairs each night and Im sure its a funny thing to watch, so maybe its for the best that no one has been here LOL.... except sometimes its been a little scary on me own... oh well, such is life aye... its what we sign up for..

Anyways.... enough of my troubles LOL..... I know they are minor compared to so many others out there, and to be honest I shouldnt have anything to complain about... not really, should I... so I will shut up now...

So.... Monday 1st June, me best matie Wendy picked me and me bag up at 6.30 on a bright and already sunny morning, I had to be at the hospital by 7.30 so she kindly offered to take me and drop me off and try and get back home in time to take her 4 kids to school and college... we would be cutting it fine.... she knew how scared I was over this coming surgery especially after all that happened and is still going on with the other knee from last year, Wendy me matie, is probably the only person on this entire planet that really really knows me... and I love her and her family to bits.... I know that she is one of the only people in this world that I can truely rely upon in any given things....

I was gagging for a cuppa tea or some toast or something, I was starving, ya see, I have this daft thing that I do LOL.... oh shut it, I dont care that you will probably think Im crazy to LOL... it was Monday and I had not eaten anything since lunchtime on the Friday, and had nuffin to drink since Saturday lunchtime, ya see, I have this fear of hospital bedpans or auntie morris's LOL and my pea sized brain tells me that if I dont eat or drink anything for 2-3 days before surgery then I will NOT need a pee or a poo for a few days after surgery and until I cant get out of bed and get to the loo meself.... I KNOW its crazy, but thats me aint it, I aint normal....

So we signed in at the military security gates and got a carpark pass, we found the little ward that was like a holding bay... ya do all the paperwork and see the surgeons and anthesetist in this little ward and after ya had ya surgery you go onto the 24 bed ward, which was to be the same ward as last year....

This weeks intake of patients would be the last cos you see Haslar would be closing in a few short weeks after over 250 years as a military hospital, cos a new super dooper hospital is/has been built at Cosham where the QA hospital is (thats where I go for fracture clinic and for physio etc) so the atmosphere in haslar was a mix of saddness by the staff and excitement.... the other hospital is only about 6 miles from where I live and it would of been so much easier if I was there, except haslar is special, and homely and old and quaint and loverly and I would rather be there then in the new fangled modern hospital....

So Wendy drops me off and with tears from both sides (she knows how scared I was and that I had no one there like all the other patients, no one to hold me hand), but she also knows that Im a strong old cow, and if anyone could do it alone again then it was me.... so much hugs and tears and promises of ringing me and coming in to see me... she walked down the ward and out the double doors...

I had no time to worry though, ya have many forms to fill in, forms that repeat themselves over and over, then ya surgeon comes and sees ya and talks through things with ya, then the anethestist (sp) comes and has a chat with ya and this time he was a gorgeous hunky dutch army bloke..... MMmmm mmmmm LOL

He had a great sense of humour which matched mine, and we so did laff whilst going through things, he said, in the most juice flowing accent, Ive a feeling your gonna be trouble LOL.... I was 5th on the list which meant sometime around teatime I would go for surgery, they put me last on the list cos of the added complications that were involved this time...... dam and bugger, that meant almost a whole day with still no food, this would be day 4 without a nibble of grub, but, it was for a good cause, right? lol

Well noon came and went, and I was glad I was not having to watch others in the other ward eating there lunch, cos my tummy was well rumbling, and I had the beginnings of a sick headache where I had not had a drink for a few days.... 2 o'clock came and went and slowly the ward I was in began to empty where patients went to theatre for surgery and then went onto the other bigger ward..... 4 o'clock came and I was the only one in the ward LOL.... so they suggested that I might as well have me bed in the ward where I would be later after surgery, instead of sitting there on me own.... so as luck has it I had a bed by a huge window which I straight away opened fully to let the air in, cos it had been a hot day outside...

4.30 came and went an by then my head was thumping, why had they not come for me, time was getting on, the ward doctor walked by and said I looked as white as a ghost, and I had gone so very quiet.... I told him I had a sick headache and had a throat like a parrots bum where I had not had a drink for 3 days, and I felt a little light headed and dizzy, and was it possible for me to have just a tiny sip of water, to which he said NO, he did a few checks and said I was a tad dehydrated hence me sick headache and that he would put a line in to give me some fluids before I went down to surgery, and they could use the same line down in theatre...

Twas a little hard to fine a vein cos I was a little fluidless LOL... do you know that on my notes is says 'a bit of a bleeder' LMFAO... it truely does, I read them hahahaha... as you can see by the above photo as soon as they dig a hole in me, I bleed, and thats before they attached a fluid line....

Anyways, they hung a fluid drip up and they said it shouldnt be long and I should be going down to theatre..... and that the fluid would help with me headache.....

Well 5 o'clock came and went and the nurse in charge came and sat on me bed and said that I would not be going to theatre cos they had run out of 'theatre time' WTF and cos mine was gonna be a long one there would not be enough 'recovery' staff still available SO THEY FUCKING CANCELLED... when she told me this, I lost it, I just broke down and sobbed, they didnt get it, I had waited all day on the edge of me nerves, no food for 4 days and 3 days without a drink, they couldnt cancell, not now, everything was in place, my Jacob in the middle of his exams and lifts to school arranged, I had sorted out me 13 nippers with other childminders, it was so hard to organise everything for everyone, they didnt understand how much energy and courage it had taken me to be there today, after what happened last year.... they couldnt cancel, they couldnt, I sobbed and sobbed like some demented lunatic, I dont know if it was the lack of food and drinks or just that EVERYTHING GETS COCKED UP where Im concerned.... the nurse said me consultant/surgeon would be down to see me in a little while to explain... and she pulled the curtains around me to give me a bit of private time to compose meself... LOL

Now what was about to happen I find funny now, but at the time I didnt... I was distraught.... I never felt so alone in me life.... how pathetic was I, what a total loser was I.... how come everything never goes to plan in life where Im concerned, no matter what I do, or what I dont do, Im constantly tested....

I was still connected to the IV drip in the back of me hand, but I didnt wanna sit behind this curtain on me own, I needed to get the hell out of there and find someplace where I could have a right proper cry and to think what to do.... and I certainly didnt need fluids anymore, so I yanked the IV tube thingie out of the connecter thing in the back of me hand... and got off the bed to try and find the loos where I could sit in peace and have a right proper breakdown LMFAO...luckily I was only 3 beds from the end of the ward, as I got off the bed I went so light headed and had to stagger down the corridor, I found a washroom and loo and went in and locked the door.....

now the funny bit...well I think it is lmfao

I had on a new white fluffy dressing down, and a hospital flapper gown and me pink crocs as slippers... but as I looked down, the front of me white dressing gown had streaks of red all down he front, wtf, when I look at where my hand should of been there was blood actually gushing out of the end of me sleeve of me gown.... now, remember I had not eaten for days or drunk and that I was so overwhelmed and light headed and not thinking straight due to crying like a pathetic child... well LMFAO.... my brain registered all the blood coming out of me sleeve and it said OH SHIT, someone had cut off me hand cos there was no hand there, and the blood must of been coming from the STUMP ..... fear... panic.... my brain screamed WHO CUT OFF MY BLOODY HAND HOW DARE THEY.... I raised my arm in horror to look at the bloody stump, and as I did so the blood gushing out hit the mirror on the wall and splattered in the sink and as I turned round it splattered up the shower curtain..... by now I was actually bleeding quite profusely, and my brain was working overtime.... I lowered me arm and what I thought was a bloody stump, only to realise no one had cut me hand off LMFAO it was where the sleeve of me dressing gown was a tad long and had fallen over me hand, making it look like I had no hand there at all, cos I must have short arms LOL Jesub when I looked I could see me fingers but no stump, just blood pumping out everywhere..... they was not wrong in having in me notes that I was a 'bit of a bleeder'....

oh my, how ones brain works when faced with just so much lmfao I think it was the lack of food and water and the shock.... the blood was actually gushing out real fast and the front of me dressing gown was just totally red..... when I took stock of the situation and looked around the little room looked like there had been a mass murder going on, blood was on the mirror and on the wall as I had turned around and over the shower curtain and dripping all over the floor, I hung over the little sink and watched in a daze as the blood was pumping out of the canula that was in the vein in the back of me hand, how was I to know that the blood would just pump out when I took the line out... KNOCK KNOCK on the door, Mel are you alright, a little voice asked, only there is a trail of blood up the corridor leading to this door, is your canula bleeding.... oh shit oh shit, my mind was racing, they will think Im right proper stupid..... 'no no I say, its okay, its fine' how could I let anyone in, the state of the washroom looked like a slaughter house LOL - I grabbed a handful of paper towels and wrapped them around my hand which soon became soaked with blood and again began dripping on the floor, I pulled loads of paper towels out of the machine and tried to wipe the mirror and walls and sink lmfao but all it did was smear it to make it look worse, by now I was so very very light headed and I really thought I was gonna pass out.... BANG BANG BANG on the door, okay Mel open the door there is blood and water seeping under the door, you need to open the door' the sink was over flowing where it was blocked with the paper towel and that mixed with all the blood on the floor it had no where to go but under the door and out into the corridor...

No matter where I looked there was blood everywhere, but I had no choice but to open the door to a look of horror on the army doctors face, I stood there in a panic with the blood still really gushing out of the thing in me hand and swaying almost at the point of passing out, he gently takes my hand and puts his finger over the open valve stopping the blood instantly, he is standing in the washroom with me blood staining his brown brogues and dripping on his clean blue shirt (WHERE WAS YA CHUMPA WHEN I NEEDED YA LOL) he says ' quite a bloody bleeder aren't you Mel' then he says my goodness it looks like a slaughter house in here.... I started to cry again and kept saying Im so sorry I was trying to clear it up...

Its funny now, but it was not at the time, I truely honestly thought in my stressed out state that some bastard had cut my hand off....

He took me back to me bed and after a cuppa tea and a few tests put up a new drip with some blood in it for a top up LOL apparently I had lost almost a pint and a half...

An hour later I was cleaned up and dressed in me own clothes.... having a fresh supply of blood in me... I still needed to get out of there.... I needed to gather me thoughts... I needed space....so I went down in the lift to sit out on the back steps in the fresh air, I sat there trying to get me head around how I could re-organise everything.... the tears began to bubble up again... and those that know me know I dont do 'tears' unless at the end of me tether...my head was pounding, my mind whirling... why does shit and bad luck always sit on my already overcrowded shoulders.... the nice little nurse came rushing out the door all a fluster LOL... she well made me jump..... 'christ Mel, we have been looking all over for you, come on, come inside and lets see what we can do about this mess... you really shouldnt be sitting out here on your own after everything' .... I kept saying Im so sorry about the mess, how was I to know the blood would just keeping gushing out the thing in me hand'.... not that mess she said, you loon Mel, I mean the mess about the cancellation of your operation' to which we both burst out laffing...

I went back to the ward and again sat on me bed.. and whilst sitting there someone come up behind me and put there arms around me and just hugged me real tight, it was me bestest matie Wendy, she had rung the ward to see how the operation went only to be told about the cancellation, and the blood loss and how sad I was.... she knew I would be distraught, she knew how hard it was for me to be there in the first place... not just organising everything but also being self employed I would be losing hundreds in wages and putting me home on the line with no money coming in for the mortgage and bills... she knows me like a favourite book... so as soon as they told her, she asked her John to sort their kids out and she jumped in the car and 50 minutes later she was with me, she and I are so close and she just let the tears flow, she knows me like no other...

Come on she says, lets get a crimple chair and I'll take you for a coffee, the cafe might still be open.... we found the little hospital cafe and we was the only ones there, she bought chocolate cake and a mug of tea... jebus it hit the spot after not eating for 4 days LOL and we talked and talked, and laffed and laffed at how its 'always me' that shit happens to.... these complications these hiccups these things only happen to you Mel... you sure are being tested...

When we got back to the ward me consultant was there, he stood in front of my red puffy tearstained face..... Dave you cant cancell, not now, YOU know how hard its been for me to organise everything and to have the courage to get here today, you cant cancel... he said he would put me back on the waiting list and it would probably only be a couple of weeks or even maybe next week.... I told him, why not tomorrow, just bump someone else off the list and let me be first tomorrow, he said it dont work like that and that he was not in theatre tomorrow... I told him it was NOW or never, I couldnt do this again in a few weeks and I would have to just hobble around for the rest of me life a crimple and have no life like I hadnt for the past few years, I said everything was arranged at home with everything.... please Dave DONT DO THIS TO ME.... you aint wearing my shoes Daveieboy, just bump some little old lady off the list and do me next..... he said that would not be fair, so I said 'fair on who Dave... what, and your being fair now'.... the nurse just looked at me in horror LOL no one talks to top surgeons/consultants like that....

A loverly nurse called Lisa came and sat on the bed to talk to me and to Dave (me consultant) she knew me from last year and during the day we had had such a laff together, she knew me story and how hard everything was to sort out and how badly I needed me life back and after all the shit promises from last years left knee balls up, she was in my court..... I said, look Dave, if your not in theatre tomorrow, get someone else to do it, someone else must have a space, a slot, I dont care now who does it, be it the bloody teaboy, its now or never.... he said, surgeons dont like to take on at the last minute someone elses patients.... I said, then make me the first, make me the expection to the rule.... Dave YOU OWE ME THIS AFTER LAST YEAR...

The nurse said to him, but it is possible that someone else would do it if they had a gap, a space or a cancellation... he said they might but the chances were it was slim, he said he would ring around tomorrow and see if there was anything that could be done, oh yeah Dave, so, I says, that means you go home and forget about me, your just saying that to cover your arse..... Mel, he said, I promise you I will ask, if not, then I will have you back in within a fortnight..... he said go home and wait to hear.... the nurse then said..... look MrD, the bed is Mels, she might as well stay the night and see whats what in the morning.... ok he said, but no promises, and Im not here and someone would have to spend much time going over me notes cos of all thats gone on before.. no promises he said.... and he walked away.....

Wendy hugged me with promises of ringing me in the morning...

So that night I went to bed on a ward scared and confused and almost praying that just once JUST BLOODY ONCE... my life wouldnt be messed with... why me, why does this shit always happen to me....

Lets see what tomorrow brings.....lets just see what else will kick me into kingdom come... lets just see....

Okay enough boring Twaddle, its a little after midnight and its now I suppose Friday morning just...... knackered beyond knackered....

If you have read down this far you need to admit yourself to a loonie bin LOL

know you are loved....

x

Just A Quickie...

2009-06-12T06:55:00.010Z

Ok.... well, I survived, but not without a few complications....now, it wouldnt be normal if things in life concerning me actually went according to plan LOL

First off, I wanna fank everyone for all the lovely comments in the previous post, I was gobsmackingly overwhelmed by everyones kindness, I truely do not deserve it...but it warmed the cockles of me heart....and when Im up to it, I will reply to each and every one...

I will keep this short with just a quick explanation.....cos Im not up for much and this will knacker me just doing this short post....

As you know I went into hospital on Monday 1 June, but cos this is me LOL I didnt get the op until Wednesday 3 June around T-time.... (long story, will explain if I blob)...

This time I decided no sedation at all, fully awake... and yes I took me camera again so I have many great photos (and the theatre staff was arguing who was going to take the photos and the surgeons even posed in some like broadway stars lol.... as I explained before I already had a couple of large screws in me knee from a previous acl/pcl reconstruction when I snapped me ligiments playing football a few years back, and these screws had to come out before they could do the total knee replacement....... well, me surgeon (who was NOT MY surgeon - long story will explain if I blob lol) talked to me about the possibility that when they dig out the screws the bone to the left of the femur will obviously be very weak, and there is a possibility that it could sheer off when they cut out the knee joint and hammer and chisel in the new knee joint and if that was to be the case then, things would not be good, but he said I needed to know the risks.....

Well during the op I being fully awake and directing camera action and joking and laffing with everyone, I heard MrClark (yes top orthopedic surgeons are called Mr and NOT Dr here when they reach a certain rank) say... 'oh shit'...... so I say whats that suppose to mean, to which he says, you know I explained about the sheering off of that 3rd of the bone in ya femur....... well, he says, it didnt happen..... phew I said, BUT he said.... Ive broken it in stead.......dam, I say, but it could of been worse right?.... yep says he.... well, lets say Ive had a 'lucky break' then...... to which he stops what he is doing and walks around my side of the sheet screen, looks at me and just laffs and laffs........ ya see, even though its a bit dire, it could of been oh so much worse.....

This is my Xray before the op.... you can see the leg on the right (which is actually me left leg) and last years knee replacement...... and the leg on the left (which is actually me right leg) with the screws that needed to come out before they could rip out all the guts and saw the bones and chisel and put in a new knee...... well, see the screws and the big squarish bit of bone to the left of the screws in the thigh bone, thats the bit he thought might sheer off, where in fact it didnt but it broke right across..........

So you see, I know in America you would SUE HIS ARSE..... but I was explained the risks, and to be honest, as shit as this is, as painful as this is, and believe me being home and not being in a hospital bed is bloody painful and scrary, and as hard as physio once again will be...... it didnt sheer off, it only broke LOL so Im wellabit happy...... and this years op went nuffin like last years, no laying poorly in bed for 4 days post-op, I actually watched 'The Apprentice' on the telly right after coming back from theatre and had a cheese and pickle sandwich (ok, so I did throw that up but still :) ) it was as if I had just popped out for a coffee and a chat and not major surgery, of course the very high dozes of morphine for 3 days helped LMFAO....

Anyways, this has so gotta just be a quickie.......

So I had it done just over a week ago and then back to theatre on Saturday night for a bit of tweaking and cos me stats had gone haywire..... BUT..... only 4 days after me main op (on Sunday evening) I had to discharge meself cos of a few problems here at home......

So Ive been home a few days, with a total knee replacement and a broken femur which they cant put in traction or plaster cast cos I HAVE to keep the bend in the new knee working.....

So its a tad difficult here, Im suppose to be in bed much of the time and IF when on crutches for the few moments, no weight bearing..... its a little scary though being home, without any backup as such...... but I had no choice..... its hard to try and do the exercises cos I dont know if the pain is muscle, bone or the broken femur that sends me head spinning.... Im not suppose to be even out for at least another 7-10 days.

As regards staying in bed and only getting out for the odd 5 minutes.... yeah, like thats even gonna happen..... tiz only me and my Jacob here and I have to get up to see him off to school for the rest of his exams.... and then there is things that need doing around here....

I might have to go back in and have a couple of screws put in the break, but we will see, they would rather me be in there now for another week at least, but that aint happening not now, I had to come out due to circumstances beyond my control..... see, this is me, we are talking about, life never goes according to plan, I cant have major surgery and recoup like everyone else, cos life wouldnt be my life without major cockups in it.....

I'll explain more later..... but now, Im totally knackered, I got up to let the chickens out, how I hobbled down the garden to do it is even beyond me.... and now Im totally drained........

But, Im chipper and sorta happy in a painful, frustrated, bored, scared, lonely way... its hard to be poorly when ya have no one to really care....or help.... but, the British stiff upper lip and all that bollocks........ it is what it is and there aint nowt I can do about it......

But I will say, in hospital I laffed and laffed dont know if it was the drugs or the fact that I couldnt believe this op (so far) has been so completely different to how poorly I was last year...... I know, I know, early days, its only just over a week since I had it done, and Im home alone and not quite knowing what Im suppose to be doing......... (where are ya Chupa when I need ya lol)

So, Im not to good but then I aint to bad....but what do I know LOL

I do have some very funny stories.... so all was not bad right?.....

But I do so wish I was back in hospital, being looked after and fed and cared for and being able to recoup a little before life hits me smack in the face LOL.... well, that would just dam right being spoilt right lmfao

Know you are loved....

x

Gutted and Scared Shitless.....

2009-05-31T08:59:00.016Z

Ok, some people might of realised Ive been a bit aloof of late, thats aloof and not a loufa lol..... except my brain has been like a loufa all spongey....

Its just Ive had much on me mind and the load on my shoulders sometimes gets heavy.... I cant be everyones net, no matter how hard I try...and jebus knows I try to be there for everyone of me maties....

Anyways, those that know me or have been reading this boring Twaddle will know that last year I had major knee surgery, buggered up the cartlidge completely through playing football and had to have a complete knee replacement....

If ya bored on this Sunday you can read about it... part 1 here and a bit more very graffic photos here and if that aint made ya puke ya guts up, you can read a little more funny stuff here and the last bit conclusion here

I documented everything so one day me lads might get a view into what I went through...and how hard I struggle to keep the house ticking over and maybe just how strong a person I was, so that in their future when times are tough they might remember this and think, they can do anything..

So..... things didnt go according to plan right, infections after infections, talk of loosing me leg, which thankfully that so didnt happen, but right painful physio 3 times a week for about 8 months... well we all know it threw this usually sane strong ME into a tail spin and for a bit I went into this dark hole.... and that was scarey, also through all my problems I lost a couple of what I thought were good friends.... that hurt more then the pain and shit I went through....oh well.....

Aint this just the bestest photo... the photos in the link are from my own camera, I took me camera into theatre with me and cos I was semi awake during the op, I asked for one of the team of 7 to take photos lol.... dont know if I will take me camera into hopital this time, I just wanna get in and out withint a few days...keep me head down and not talk to anyone....

Me consultant promised me me life back, back to hiking on the Southdowns and camping with our amazing village scout group and I know he couldnt promise me me football and tchoukball sports back, or sking or marathons (not that I do either of the last 2 lol) I just wanted to be able to do the hiking and stumbling around in the woods and rivers with the school survival camps etc....

Well it did go tits up, and me left knee will never be the same.... its not as good as I would like but compared to how it was then it will do me just fine, it just dont bend back as far as I like so kneeling will always be a bit of a problem, but Im still working on it and slowly Im getting there....and even though the swelling is still there a little, they say it can take 2 years.... but I didnt let it beat me....

Until..... back in November I was hobbling on me dodgy rebuilt knee down the garden early one morning to let the chickens out, when I stumbled on the uneven ground, I still wasnt to good on wobbly ground, as I stumbled I put me good right leg out to steady meself and to stop meself falling on me arse in the mud.... as I did that I had such a sharp pain shoot up me good leg, bugger I though, Ive pulled a muscle or heaven forbid Ive torn me acl or another ligiment.....

I thought it would pass and that whatever it was would sort itself out, but as the weeks went by I realised the pain was not going anywhere and that I had maybe done something a little more then pulled a muscle...but I have a very high pain threshold so I just got on with it as best I could, knowing I had me consultant in April....

So me replaced knee was getting better and NO LIMP (that was my fear) but I was hobbling on what was me good right leg lmfao.....

I saw me consultant a few weeks ago, he was fairly happy in a not so happy way about the left knee he had done the replacement on (remembing I had been back into hospital 2 more times with it having it reopened and fiddled with lol)... so I mentioned me good leg and the pain in me knee and said I thought I might of pulled something.....

Ya see 5 yearas ago I snapped both me acl and me pcl playing football, I use to play proper when younger in a team that travelled Europe and this country, it was the best years of me life and I wouldnt swap them for anything.... so I was badgered into playing in a charity football match 5 years ago.... well in scoring a 20 yrd goal I turned in my victory salute and me foot stayed planted in the mud and me knee twisted and just snapped both me acl and me pcl.... so eventually I had reconstructed surgery on them lol they took me hamstring and drilled holes in me bones and used the hamstring like an elastic band and screwed and plated it into place.... it took yonks to heal and for me to be able to get back into sports.... but heal it did.....

These are the screws in me good knee, this is not my Xray but one from a different acl reconstruction, mine has a tiny plate in it with the screws... but it gives you the idea who what he has to dig out lol before he can do the main surgery...

So, me consultant does all these acl tests by pulling and shoving me knee much to me almost screams LOL.... but he said the acl was still intact, so he sent me round the corner for an Xray....

I went back to his room to face not smiling faces, sit Mel he said..... you my dear must be one of the most unluckiest patients Ive had for a long time... ya aint resnapped ya acl what ya did when ya put ya good leg out to steady yaself is this.... it must of been at a strange angle cos the cartlidge has shot out and is lodged in about 8 bits behind you kneecap and your main bones are sitting on each other, technically you shouldnt be able to even bend you knee, you really do have a high pain threashold.... but cos of that the bones have worn and I have no choice but to repeat a complete knee replacement on what was ya good leg..... NOW this week if possible.....

Well the shock of it put me in floods of tears and I DONT do tears often.... how could this be happening to me, after the shit year I had with the other one....

He said, Mel, listen, we will rebuild you, ya just unlucky this time..... I told him to keep his empty promises cos I had heard empty promises all me life....well I also told him I couldnt go in NOW cos I have much to organise and my Jacob will be in the middle of his major school exams until the end of June.... so he said with much unhappiness that he will put me down for surgery then.... he said this one will be a little more difficult cos he has to dig the screws and the little plate out from me acl reconstruction and then take a bit of hip bone for a graft to plug the holes before he can get the cutting gear on me knee...... oh fucking joy....

Only, the week before last I got a letter from him saying that I really cant put it off any more and that he really needed me in asap, and he gave me the date of 1 June.... thats next Monday.... thats tomorrow.....

My boy will be in the middle of his exams and could really do with me here, but on the other hand me consultant is quite addiment that he wants me in NOW....

So...... mixed emotions...... the fear has kicked in big time, cos of all the shit from the last one, not just physically but emotionally and mentally..... not having anyone here that really cares except me lads is hard.... no hand to hold, not even a hug to go into hospital with.... so the lonieless thoughts are well and truely with me today.... and I dont know if I actually have the strength to go through again all that I went through last year... Im so use to hobbling around I dont know what walking or hiking proper is.... I always make the best of a bad thing and except for the excrusiating pain and the total knackeredness, I sort of am use to living this way....

Of course it dont help to read this on me consent form... DEATH... I asked me consultant who will is me surgeon not to let me die, Im all me lads have... he said, it aint guaranteed but he will try his dammest not to let that happen said he aint lost one yet... oh joy..

Again the question of being self employed, I wont get any help financially whilst Im off work so as much as me consultant has said NO WORK FOR at least 8-10 weeks this time and has written me a sick certificate for 6 weeks and a pre-dated one for another 6 weeks, they aint really worth the paper they are written on.......

I rang the benefits office to see if there was any help I could expect whilst I was out of work and recuping.... $80 a week she said lol so I asked if it would help if I was a 'black jewish lesbian with 5 kids and no thought of working in the future' she said she didnt find that comment funny.... I told her I was not joking and if it would help my cause then I become one....

Anyways suffice to say I told them to shove it up their arse and I will sort it meself....... so, unlike me maties when they are sick or unable to work, not that any of them have had major surgery, I will HAVE to drag myself back to work after 3 weeks no matter how much pain or how shit I feel, its different for me maties they have big families around to help and working hubbies to take the strain financially for a few months...... me well, I'll have my Sam and Jacob here LOL so it will be up to me to get back to work no matter what me consultant says...he aint gonna pay me mortgage or bills is he... he aint wearing my shoes, but it means I wont be able to recover proper or rest or recup..... fuck it aye, the story of me life..... aint had anyone before that gave a dam, so dont know why I thought I would have it now lol....

So, Im the most frightened I have even been in me life, cos I know what was what from last time, and as much as I try to stay positive thinking it wont go tits up again, this is me we are talking about and life always smacks me in the face with all its got...... I must of been one hell of a bad kid to have this life I have....

And cos of a comment left on Twaddle a few months back by a commenter that I thought was a friend, Ive found it very difficult to share my fears with anyone but a couple of people.... sometimes harsh misdirected words to another person, such as towards me, can have a devastating affect, it meant I kept this news and problems to meself.... cos I didnt wanna seem needy......

Also with me matie fighting her illness, mine in comparison is nuffin.... so Ive carried that guilt also.....

Anyways I could go on and on about this, but its hard to type through the tears.... just feel so alone with this again.......

Im driving meself to the hospital tomorrow for 7am.... I'll leave me car there and figure out how to get me and the car home when they release me....I didnt wanna make a fuss with me maties as to how to get there, they are already having me minded nippers for me....... and cos again of those harsh words from a commenter I feel I should just do this all on me own...... me consultant said cos of what happened before and how I dont do to well with surgery, he wants to keep me in for 10 days....... I told him to shove that and I need to be out by the weekend, cos its also my Jacobs birthday on the 10th.... so we will see, as soon as Im on crutches Im out of there.... need to be here for my Jacob.... got others and responsibilities to put first before meself....

I also have me NVW3 assessment on the 9th and an appointment with a solicitor on the 11th about me tosser X, Ive had the last broken rib off of him....... thats all great aye after major surgery a week before LOL....so you see I need to be out by the weekend...dont know how Im gonna get home or get me car home yet lol Ive been practising driving me car using me left leg this week instead of me what will be me operationed leg...... nearly went into the back of 2 cars and mounted the pavement LOL so I will have to play driving me car home straight after surgery by ear LOL...

So, I wont be around for a while...if at all....maybe this is a good closing point for Twaddle.... Ive put to much of my inner self on these pages over the last 2 years and Im usually a very private person....we'll see........ its all a load of bollocks anyways...........

I have much to do and still to organise.... need to fill the fridge and freezer for Sam and Jacob and sort the house and washing out and the garden....

But on a lighter note, it would of been me mums 83rd birthday today.... Im said all I came about me mum before here and there aint really anything to say about me mum, except I wish it had been different, maybe I wouldnt feel so lonely and unloved now LOL

So a few photos to finish with, as a treat, if you have read down this far with this boring post....

me strawberry plants, we decided to put them in a hanging basket this year lol

My boys at our Toms engagement Party last December.... thats my Jacob on the left, then Sam, Tom and Ben.... Jacob and Toms hair is shorter now..

My Janet that I love beyond measure LMFAO daft cow that I am..

Yesterday whilst in me garden cutting the grass and watering all me hanging baskets and tubs and seedings.... I took this photo thinking...... I really shouldnt of electrical cables for the mower and me hose so close together lol

Ok, Im just rambling here now....... so I will go with my fears and tears and loneliness and try and get all that I need to do done today....

And if anyone wants to come over to hold me hand and stay for a week so I can sleep LOl then you only have til 6.30am tomorrow morning to get here lol....

So Im gutted and scared shitless...

Be safe maties..... know you are loved...

x

Bake Away The Stress...

2009-05-26T22:09:00.028Z

Ok......... Ive had a lot on me mind of late.... got much 'stuff' going on in my life at the moment....and have got two maties that are facing a challenging struggle in life - one here in real life that will not make it to the end of that struggle - Im trying to make my shoulders as wide as I can to carry the extra load without it all tumbling down around me ears......

I have a very special cyber friend in my life who is starting on a hard journey in her life.... her strength and dignity has left me humbled and very ashamed of the whining person I sometimes can be..... she is the most beautiful person, with a soul that floats around and enriches everyone it touches.... I love her very dearly and a battle with her illness is just beginning.... she has enriched my life 10 fold since knowing her, she is an inspiration to all......

Anyways.....sigh..... there seems to be many folders piled on me shoulders this past month or so..... but I will suss and sort them, I will file things and work through each page and the times that I think will be hard, I will deal with as best I can, like I have had to all me life....... because compared to what my matie is facing, my worries is chicken shit...

So......... what does Mel do when she holds the world and all its worries on her shoulders......

She bakes LOL

First ya lightly brown minced beef and veggetables with an oxo cube and bits and bobs of whatever you have at hand...

Then ya scoop it all into ya most favourite oven dish, the green french one ya bought back from france all those years ago..

And whilst the meat and veggies are browning ya peel and boiled sweet potatoes and normal spuds...

Ya then mash the spuds together with loads of creamy butter and full milk with salt and pepper and mix in one of Janets fresh morning eggs (which when then baked in the oven will fluff the spuds up and make them light and scrummie)...

Ya spoon the mashed creamie spud mixture on top of the meat and veggies...

Sprinkled with grated mature cheddar and top with sliced tomatoes...

Ya then shove the lot in the oven and cook on gas 200 for 30 minutes until golden and crisp.... serve with steamed green veggies..... and bobs ya uncle... ya can feed an army of hungry lads...

This is our version of the shepherdless pie..... no shepherds were killed in the making of this pie..

Whilst thats in the oven, and ya still on stress level HIGH....

Ya make a huge crock pot full of spicy sausage, sweet potatoe and lentil thingie, which makes the whole house smell scrumous...

Then ya look around to see what else takes ya fancy.... and ya think how to use the rest of the sausages, which wasnt cheap to say the least, but then our sausages are to scrummie for words.... but of course I cant eat the pork ones, but somethings I make with lamb sausages..

So ya lightly brown the sausages and leeks and make up a grainy mustard sauce, which is just mustard, butter, milk, flour and parsley... ya mix it all up and bung in ya little favourite Portmerrion china pie dish...

Ya top with a quick and easy to make pastry lid.... find ya larry the lobster biscuit cutter and cut out a lobster with the spare pastry.... crimp the edges NOT using granmas false teeth LOL - make a few slits to let the steam out...

close up of larry the lobster biscuit cutter stoke pastry shape cutter lol

DaDaaaaaaaaaa one perfect leek and grainy mustard pie......

I love my larry the lobster biscuit cutter....

Then ya think, ya gotta have a pudding lmfao...... so whilst the kitchen is in a mess ya think I know what everyone will like.....

Banananana lol and pumpkin seed cake..... to use up the bananas of course...

and..

A lemon and a lime cake... to use up the lemons and limes right :)....

Then ya feel quilty that the kitchen is a mess and ya really need to be getting some more veggies in them lads and their maties......

So whilst the kitchen cant get any messier, you think what the hell, might as well make up a couple of beetroot and chocolate cakes..... ya know, to get them veggies in them lads....

of course one has to cut a slice to try, ya know, to make sure them there lads cant taste the beetroot in the cake......

then by the time ya have cooked ya stress away, the kitchens a mess and ya scream up the stairs..... SOMEONE HAD BETTER GET DOWN HERE AND CLEAN THIS MESS UP AND DO THE DISHWASHER....... which falls on deaf ears...... so ya make a huge mug of tea and go sit in the garden and watch ya chickens....... and ya think..... thats me..... all baked out, but stress free...... cos tomorrow is another day and another challenge...

So who wants to come to stay.......... I might not have much to offer, but ya sure wouldnt go hungry :)

More then enough boring twaddle for a very very late stressed out day.....cripes its 12.50am Wednesday morning......... yep, sure was a stressful day....

Love, thats all it takes.... not money, or wants, just love..... love those around ya..... please, near and far..

(((((((((Starr))))))))))) fanks, you know for why.. x

x

Things Mothers Dont Need To See...

2009-05-22T08:16:00.018Z

Ok.....My oldest lad is off to Thailand on Monday, just a few days time, he was made redundant about 6 weeks ago and hasnt been able to find anything else, so before his money runs out he thought to hell with it, and he just booked a ticket to Thailand for a month and said he will travel around and just see what happens.... you have to understand that this lad is quite a home bod and aint NEVER done nowt like this before without a gaggle of maties with him, so this is a first, and to say Im worried, is an understatement..... I know he is a man but he is still one of my babies lol.... His going has come at an awkward time cos of what is happening in the next few weeks, BUT I just aint told him that, so that he can go without any worries about home here......... and he goes with my love and heart and I will worry until he comes home full of life and an experience of a lifetime..... hope he dont get got by no batty boys lol..... 3 of his maties will join him for the last 9 days of his adventure, thats if they can ever get to meet up, and he will of been on his own for 3 weeks by then, or in some Thailand prison or in a 'man brothel' cos he might of run out of money by then lol..... oh hush it, Ive read about these things lol....

So, back to this post....this is probably boring but if so just scroll to the bottom and watch the video lol

My 15 year old is in the middle of his GCSEs which are the major exams as he prepares to leave compulsary education.... except all schools have next week off for half term and study leave, then he has 8 GCSEs that first week back, so its hectic here besides some other things that I might share in a few days time.... but ya know me, as private as a ginger testicle...

Well, this lad of which I speak is the most amazing agile bendable flexible lad..... his passions in life are trampolining and BMXing and free running.... We have had a trampoline in our garden for about 20 years.... way way before they became a 'must have garden accessory'.... obviously its not the same trampoline, its been replaced 3 times now, and its not one of those round 'play' ones, its a proper one, the one down from the fold up ones that you find in sports halls..... its an oblong proper one, not a round toy one lol..

Last year the old trampoline needed replacing so I rang the company where I had bought from in the past and explained that I had bought from them before and told them we needed the super-king deluxe or whatever it was called BUT there is no way I was gonna pay £750 ($1500) for it, what was the best they could do LOL....... the bloke on the end of the photo called me a cheeky bitch LOL.... HOW RUDE :) Anyways he said leave it with him and he'd get back to me...... see, ya dont ask ya dont always get... and he did ring back about an hour later... he said they had the trampoline I wanted in stock and cos of my cheek he said he had found one with a scuff mark on the padded surround mats and cos of that.... and he was so laffing.... he said it couldnt be sold at full price, so he could do me a deal with it....... so I says...... how much of a scuff.... and he says..... well I just scuffed it with me shoe for ya LMFAO........ Bloody hell, I think 'I pulled' lmfao..... I asked him if he was serious and he said, ya made me laff this morning so what the hell....... so we got our new trampoline for just £350 ($700) and not $750 ($1500)....400 bloody hundred quid cheaper for being cheeky lmfao - DONE AND BLOODY DUSTED.....

So...... my lad uses it to practise some of the moves he learns at trampoline club.....except he is now teaching the trampoline coach new moves LOL.... he makes my heart stop watching him in the garden..... but I smile through it when he says.... mum watch this......

As you can see, its very near the shed...... you know, the shed that he often leaps off on onto the trampoline LOL

Standing on the shed.... He can do easy back and front flips but he aint satisfied with those so its usually double back half twists to full double front 360 full twist and all that nonsense lol

He does things like side rotations in the air and when he first started trying them, he would often bounce sidewards right over me twat neighbours 6 foot fence lmfao.... praise the lord no broken bones on this lad YET...

Got this photo just as he landed a double front half twist to flat front LOL.... Im sure thats NOT the technical term for it..

How perfect is this photo ..... his trampoline coach says he is the highest bouncer he has ever come across.... he needs to get high to do his twists etc, which is fine in a supervised sports hall, but in the back of me tiny garden with concrete fence posts and twat neighbours and sheds and chicken coops surrounding the trampoline it aint always safe LOL

During the week, my Jacob was doing a few moves on the trampoline when our twat neighbour shouts something over the fence..... he was talking to me, I think lol.... so I ignored him to begin with...... but he kept on and bloody on.... WHAT? I said rather loudly..... he then went on to say that he was having a BBQ with many important friends and work collegues that evening and would like us NOT to use the trampoline during the hours of 6.30 and 10.30..... hahahahahahaha.....how dare me DEMAND instead of ask.... I asked as to the reason why he didnt want the trampoline to be used.... and he said...... because he didnt wanna see someone jumping up and down up and down over the fence all evening when they had friends around and it would be annoying.... all I can say is RED FLAG and BULL :)........

So I says........ dam, and I was gonna ask you if it was possible for you NOT to have a BBQ this evening as Jacob has to practise and the smoke from the BBQ and the noise of chatter and laughing that comes with a BBQ is very annoying and off putting.......

I know I sound mean, but you just need to know what this pratt is like..... he is nasty and foul mouthed and rude and self centred and selfish and ignorant and arragant and an all round twat LOL...... Im the only one around here that stands up to him, and he is only nice, sorta, when HE wants something....

So, he says (you must understand that he is the other side of a 6 foot fence and can not see me doing a chicken dance and making childish faces LOL.... so, Ive made myself clear then have I, he says........... yes I reply, perfectly clear..... Jacob comes in for his dinner and we hear the BBQ friends arrive next door and we hear the twat neighbout put on his posh voice, his, I am better then everyone voice, his fake voice to these important friends LOL...... smoke everywhere..... chatter, noise, laughter LOL......

So you ask did we do as HE asked............. HELL NO, ya see, there are ways of asking favours and there 'are ways' of asking..... and he picked the wrong one :)..... its amazing what fun my Jacob and his 3 mates had that evening bouncing and jumping off the shed with me twat neighbours party just 3 foot away behind a 6 foot fence, which aint no height when ya bouncing 15-20 foot in the air LOL...... my lad said, hey mum, they aint even got matching plates LMFAO ...... Oh shut it, you have to understand the dynamics of living next to this bloke.....

Anyways THAT was not the things mothers didnt need to see........... the following is...... My lad was on the computer a few days ago and said, hey mum come look at this that me matie just sent me..... Jebus mary muvver of whoever.....

This is my Jacob doing a twisted somersault off the junior school roof a few months ago...... son, I says, there are things mothers dont need to see.... Oh mum, Jacob says, that aint nuffin...... watch this.....

I think I need to move closer to the hospital LOL - hope he doesnt start doing this off the tall trees he will be climbing when he goes to college in September lol....

Enough boring Twaddle for a bright sunny Friday morning.......

x

I Tried Honestly I Did - Lord Knows I Did

2009-05-16T16:09:00.008Z

Ok.... someone tell me that busy is good right? that busy takes ya mind off of those things ya dont wanna thing about right? busy as hell knackers ya out so that ya dont have the time or energy to think about 'those things' ya dont wanna think about right?

As you can tell, its been a busy old week.... one day I will get to slow down... yeah right....

First off Ive been busy before and after school.... me matie that rang me from doodleland one morning in the week will testify how busy I was, she said she could hear the nippers.....

See..... I lieth not lol..... shame I aint this busy with nippers all day..... I know these nippers parents ought to be cleaning their school shoes sometimes though, just look at the state of em lol and cos I cant stand kids going to school with dirty shoes, I bloody cleaned 9 pairs of black shoes and boots cos Sprites little pink trainers was just fine..... like I aint got enough to do in the mornings..gawds sake..

I lost Sprite and Jon again on Monday, as the job their father did have went down the drain on Monday, so that means my job with them also went down the drain so thats $1200 a month down..... so time to pull in the belt that is already pulled in...

Soooo... those that know me KNOW that I rarely spend any money on me.... only the bare lifes essentials plus the odd CD... well get this..... back in the week I splashed out on something for me..... I did it.... I picked something off the shelf and hobbled to the checkout and handed over the goods and then handed over me money..... and let me tell you, it was very difficult..... I was fighting with the voice of sense in me head telling meself that I was being like normal people, and normal people sometimes bought themselves things, even though they could of done without the item lol but I did it...

Ya see, as much as inside I would like to be a girlie girl and wear heels and all the girlie things that girlie girls wear... I DONT DO HEELS....and as everyone knows I dont do pink unless its plants and the odd thing like me Etnies trainers oh and me kitchen scales oh and me crocs lol....

Just before I had me total knee replacement last year, I sat with me matie Ann in her car outside one of the big shops in town, she needed some bits of bobs for a dinner and dance she was going to.... I was already stressed out about the up and coming operation.... so we get out the car and she walks and I hobble into the shop, where she buys what she needs whilst I go off looking at stuff elsewhere.... when we get back in the car she says.... look at what I just bought and she pulls out a pair of beautiful shoes...heels.... quite high... Ive never seen me matie in heels before lol....

She says, what do you think, to which I just burst out crying.... to which she says, what on earths the matter.... so I says..... after this operation I wont be able to ever wear heels....and the tears were rolling down me face...... but Mel, you dont do heels so it dont matter you daft cow..... then I say..... and I wont ever be able to go sking or snowboarding..... to which she says..... but you've always said you hate sking....... your just being a daft cow......but even if I did, I said, I wont be able to...... now ya just being stupid she said, so shut up before I bitchslap ya..... ya see, I use to be so sporty, football and tchoukball and hiking and helping on the all real tough survival camps in the New forest..... and I knew possibly that that part of my life was gonna be over....

Anyways.... so during the week I found meself outside the shops in town..... I wanted to go there to find something special for a friend... but before I looked for that, I wandered into TXMs and walked up and down the shoe aisle... looking for girlie shoes.... yes girlie shoes for me LOL.... not heels cos I knew I would kill meself in them.... well, unless I just used them for the bedroom lmfao

I tried, honestly I did..... I picked up shoes after shoes.... and I just didnt feel it.... didnt get the WOW..... until I came across these....

Oh shut up, they are sorta girlie :).... aint they just the bestest Vans ever....

I tried them on and they were my size.... I put them back and picked them up about 7 times lol.... then thought, I'll just carry them around while I look at other things cos I can always put them back again....

Then I found these....

They are as light as a feather.... and I LOVE 'Rocket Dog' boots..... I know I know they aint heels or right proper girlie....but they certainly aint boys boots.... but listen..... where the hell would I go to wear girlie shoes, so I have to be practical and buy what I KNOW I will get most use out of.... and even FMPs wouldnt get any use out of them LOL....

So I tried with all my might to buy girlie girl shoes, and this is the best I could do.... but, I did get them in the sale.... well cheap.... instead of £65 ($130) and £70 ($140) for them, I only paid a fiver ($10) for the Vans and £10 ($20) for the Rocket dogs.... now that is a bargain....and I love em, so I aint bovvered what anyone else thinks :)

Before I went to pay for them, my mind was mulling it all over..... as much as I LOVE em, did I really NEED em..... this is how my mind works when Im responsible for the mortgage and all the bills on me own and the raising of me lads...its not that I cant afford them, cos I can, its, do I NEED them, but I decided that I couldnt live without these in me life and I would wear them constantly... as I do with me other boots lol...

As my mind was arguing with itself I found I was wandering down the aisle with the pots and pans and all the kitchen bits and bobs WHICH I LOVE with a passion.... I have some wonderful kitchen pots.... I love to bake and cook.... and have a passion for kitchen rubbish lol..... I was actually looking for something for our Tom and his girlfriend Sammie who are now living together, I know they wanted a wok, so I was wok hunting right?.. until, something caught my eye.... something that pulled me nearer..... something I didnt NEED but I so WANTED lmfao..... AND it was girlie beyond measure...... and I dont do pink now do I..... but I so wanted this......

Can you see, its now hung on me pot rack...... ITS A PINK POT.... shiny stainless steel inside and a shiny handle..... its big and deep and beautifully heavy...... and I told meself its right proper girlie LOL....... so I put one pair of boots in the pot, cos I couldnt carry 2 pairs of boots and a pot and watch 2 nippers from disappearing now could I - I gets half way to the checkout when me matie Julia spies me..... hey Mel, what ya buying..... oh I say just a few bits....... oh my she says...... your Sammie (Toms girlfriend) will LOVE that pot..... Sammie I says.... sod Sammie the pots of me...... BUT YOU DONT DO PINK she say.......... oh shut up I said.....its not pink its light red :)

So, now I have two new pairs of boots which I love to death and a new pink pot that I didnt really truely need, but it satisified the girlie part deep inside me LOL

Enough Twaddle for a windy overcast late afternoon.....

ps..... got the rest of me hanging baskets finished today and got our runner beans planted up their wigwam poles.... more later....

x

Fires - Ducks and People Should Mind Their Own Business...

2009-05-06T19:22:00.034Z

Ok..... Blimey, whats up with me, Im posting before a fortnights up lol...

I was bummed this evening to find out the computer shop had well and truely buggered up our other computer and although they gave me promises of not loosing the 5 years worth of photos on it, they accidently (TOSSERS) deleted, for ever, the bloody lot.... if ya wanna hear what a fishwife sounds like then ring me and I will repeat what I said to the tosser bloke in PC World LOL..... I know, I know I should of backed it up..... oh well, no use now crying anymore over spilt milk....or lost memories or tosser computer non-experts..

So I was going through the picture file on this computer and found some photos from back in October.... it was a surprisingly warm day for October half term.... I had Sprite as usual and just J and A, It made a change just having the 3 of them... Sprite was then 2 1/2 and J is 6 and A is just 5.... so I said to them lets down to Langstone Harbour for a walk/hobble and a picnic... but lets go with just us, not the other mob and me maties.... so my Jacob said he wouldnt mind tagging along if he could have a KFC on the way lmfao.....

Langstone Harbour is only about 8-9 minutes at the most from my house, so I suppose its fairly local, or its just that I drive fast lol

Ive did a short post on Langstone before...... ya see, if you follow the map with ya finger along the south coast, its all little inlets and harbours and islands and beaches and all completely different and all within 10-20 minutes from me.....

Langstone is just before the only bridge onto Hayling Island and in the olden days there use to be a toll gate on the bridge and when I was a kid there use to be a little steam train called The Puffing Billy that ran from Havant station to Hayling Island..... I remember being very scared as the train went along the single line track across the harbour and thinking we was flying cos all you could see either side was water.....

Langstone is tiny and old and has 2 most beautiful pubs.... and mill.... they all are the subject of many many painters... anyways, see how I go off on one lol

So I grabbed the nippers lunch boxes that their parents had bought and with promises of a KFC for my Jacob off we went.....

As you can see when we got there it was a little overcast so we thought we would sit and have lunch first..... we are sitting outside one of the pubs, you can see the other one the Royal Oak in the background and the old mill... the tide had just turned and we needed to wait til it had gone out further before we could start walking around the foreshore to the other pub... ya see... ya can only get to that one from this one when the tide is lower and behind the other pub and mill is a bird reserve and as you can see in the photo the foreshore (where the trees are) makes for a lovely walk, and if ya walk for miles ya come to Walblington ruins and then Emsworth, which will mean nuffin to anyone but me lmfao.....

One is never to old to feed the swans lol

As a child we would come to Langstone where me parents would meet up with their maties in the pub and talk sailing and all that nonsense lol and us kids would be left outside with a bottle of coke and a packet of crisps... well the water where Jacob is feeding the Swans is right out front of the pub and there use to be a floating wooden raft anchered by a long chain to the seabed, so when me parents and their maties was having a whale of a time in the pub, me and me older brother would strip off and swim to the raft.... and spend a couple of hours in the water and hopefully get out in time to get dressed so me dad didnt know what we had done, ya see, in those days, no one would of thought to of come out of the pub and away from their maties to check on the children... and Im talking deep water here LOL..... I would of been about 8 I suppose cos me younger brother was in a pushchair.... jebus my father or mother would of almost skinned me alive if they had known we had left our youngest brother in his pushchair whilst we was swimming lol.... sod em, they are both dead now so they will never know :)

As you can see, by the time we had finished lunch the tide was well and truely on its way out.... so time to walk round the foreshore in the seaweed to the other side.... Sprite LOVES my Jacob with a passion and he in turn loves her..... the times he does come out with me and the minded nippers he is gentle and caring and funny and rough and tumble with them..... I suppose cos other peoples nippers have always been a part of his life then its just old hat to him lol

This is the row of little old houses that are next to The Royal Oak Pub... when I was a kid the house on the right would sell fresh cockles from the front door... and it was such a treat to find a tanner in the mud outside the pub and go and buy a little pot of cockles to munch.

This is outside The Royal Oak, now should I leave the kids outside and go in for a quick arf a lager lol..... the pub is set up high from the sea wall which you can see, but the row of neat side stones is the edge and then its about a 5 foot drop onto the shingle...but kids learn not to get to near the edge lol... the inside of this pub has hardly been touched as such in over 100 years, and they do the most amazing grub....... someone please one day come and visit so I can show you my world :)....

This is the corner of the pub with the old mill behind, its been a private residence eversince I can remember.... and I think at one time someone right proper famous lived there, when the tide is in the mill is cut off and they cant get the cars in or out :).....talk about living right on the waters edge lol

The path leads directly behind the old mill and its strange cos out the front of the mill is the harbour views and right behind is the nature reserve with fresh water....

Thats the wall and back fence to the mill..... I love coming here with the nippers, especially in the Autumn cos ya virtually have the place to yaself.... why do so many people just say in doors in the Autumn and Winter..... Im at me best then.... maybe its cos I dont like crowds....

I dont know what A is doing in the above photo..... maybe he thinks he is Shakespeare LOL.. sometimes if we are lucky we can spot a heron..... big deal right LOL

Never to old to feed the ducks aye Jacob lol...... dont fall in kids....

Ya see, sometimes its nice to take me nippers out on me own, without me maties, cos, a place like this me other maties would be keep saying..... dont get to near the edge, come here, dont do that, no you cant get wet... and all that rubbish, but me, well I LOVE to let kids be kids..... so what if they fall in, they are hardly gonna drown are they, and dont think I haven't had them fall in before lol but ya just reach over and oike them out lol so what if they get muddy...... you wait until you see the other photos and what we got up to....... tiz a good job me maties were not there cos the nippers would of been stifled and held back from being kids....

When ya get just past the old mill with the nature reserve on ya left and the sea on ya right, this is what ya see..

This is just before the proper pathway gives way to foreshore and pebbles...... see that line of trees thats were we was gonna walk/hobble and if you look closely at the end of the taller treeline you can just make out the ruins of Walblington Castle... but thats a little further round then we was gonna walk..

The nature reserve gives way to fields with horses in them.... when I was about 12 I use to ride me old bike from where I lived to Langstone where there was a riding stables.... I never had the money for riding, but I would spend all day Saturday mucking out the stables and helping saddle up the horses for others to ride... all day, on the understanding that come the end of the day I would get to ride one of the horses bareback back to the fields where they were put for the night, which was only about 2 miles away.... but it meant riding along the foreshore and then down some tracks..... I was in heaven.... I never had lessons, no one ever told me how to ride.... I could just do it.... maybe I watched to many cowboy and indian films as a kid lol..... so I would work all day for a 20 minute ride at the end of the day, and then I would have to walk the 2 miles back to the stables to pick up me bike and then ride the 7 miles home LOL......

Just look at Sprites face, this is what makes my job so worthwhile..

At the back of the foreshore is this row of old railway sleepers used as a backdrop to the shore, so that when the tide comes up the water wont wash away anymore of the land.... these are actually the old railway sleepers from the old Puffing Billy Line that I mentioned earlier.... the nippers loved being allowed to walk along them.... with my words of 'just be careful' just said the once..... no nagging like we would of had if I had gone with others that day....

Ya can see they aint very high.... and note there is no one else around :)...

They aint high until ya son does this......

A forward 'double' front somersault off them LOL...... landed it perfect he did lol

We walked all the way along, only seeing one other person on our walk... when we got to the end of where we had set our sights on there is a bench, so being the old codger that I am I said lets sit and have a drink and a rest before heading back.... so the kids and Jacob all explored the shore area and Jacob notices the remains of an fire, ya know the ashes where someone had had a fire on the beach.... well upon investigation lmfao..... me lad kicked around in the ashes and said 'blimey mum its still warm'....... and after a bit of blowing and the nippers rushing around looking for firewood lol....... this is what happened....

Give my boy an ember and he will build you a fire fit for a king lol....

Just love this photo, look at the look on the nippers faces especially J blowing the fire LOL..... see them wooden bits sticking out of the mud.... thats whats left of the old wooden quays that was there about 100 years ago, when the harbour was a working harbour....

Yep Jacobs face says it all........ I love it that my 15 year old still loves coming out with me :)...

Warming me feet lol

We spotted a woman walking along the beach with her dog...... by then the fire was well and truely alight and Jacob asked if we had any duck bread left that we had been feeding the ducks with..... well I had saved a few slices so we had something to feed the ducks with on the way back....... so I rummaged in me bag and he got a stick cos he wanted to show A and J and Sprite (not that she would understand lol) how you can cook on a little fire......

So he toasted some bread, and as he was toasting, the woman that we had seen with the dog was almost upon us...... the kids were muddy.. and windswept.... and I suppose to an on looker we looked like a motely bunch LOL...

And it was getting nippy by now..... so as Jacob was handing out the toasted bread to the nippers this woman say....... oh my, what are you doing, you're not allowed a fire on the beach.... pardon, I says...... you heard me she said......yes I did, I replied, but I didnt quite understand.... you cant have a fire on the beach she repeated....... but mam I said... putting on me right proper hampshire farmers accent...... we need the fire to cook our dinner........ dinner she says? yes, its just toast but it will do the children until I can find us all somewhere to sleep for the night........ BLANK BLOODY LOOK........ ya see, we are vagabonds and we only wanted to get warm and get the children fed.......oh my she said.... YOU'RE GYPSIES DONT COME NEAR ME lmfao........ to which my Jacob says.... spare us a few quid love would ya.... putting on the same accent as I had LOL..... with that she called her dog and scarpered up the beach as fast as her little legs could carry her LMFAO..... we laffed and laffed and laffed..... well me and Jacob did.... J, A and Sprite started laffing cos we was laffing.....

Why dont some people just mind their own bloody business...... we was doing no harm...

J then says Mel I need the loo, and A followed suit lol....... go on then I says, you couple of pikies..... pretend ya firemen putting out the fire lol

So they did lol....... oh hush, there was no one around for miles......

A muddy kid is a happy kid right? lol....... I dont care..... I really dont :)

Time to head back, as it was getting really overcast by now.....

Bye horse..

Bye little bridge with the sloosh gate to let the overflow water from the nature reserve flow into the sea.. oh my there is the dog in the distance of the 'scared of pikies' woman lol... if we run/hobble we just might be able to catch her up LOL....

Bye little hungry ducks...

I will just show two more photos....... see what ya think....... spookie or what..

This first one is of the lane that I use to bareback ride the horses from the stables when I was a kid.... the lane is right behind the bench we was sitting on with the fire......

Pretty aye?

Now look at this one, the nippers came out of the hedgerow as I took this second photo......... WTF is that shining light..... and even more spookie...... Sprite is looking at it....... Jacob didnt see it, nor did J or A.... just me and Sprite..... is it the ghost of my past....it is my memory spirit........strange aye?

Ok way way more then enough Twaddle to bore the pants off ya for a Wednesday evening... if ya got this far ya need a meddle lol and I need to go to bed :)... DONT have nightmares now will ya..

[click on photos to enlarge - if ya can be arsed lol]

x

Jebus Wants Me For A SunBeam..

2009-04-27T08:41:00.059Z

Ok... tiz been another fortnight since Ive posted...... you would just not believe my life at the moment, so I wont even begin to explain, sometimes things are best unspoken...

So here is a long and probably boring post filled with beautiful photos of historical interest, if ya into that sorta thing..... and if ya aint, then I aint bovvered... (Toadie and JBelle this one is for you lol)

Last month my Jacob had an interview day for Sparsholt College in Winchester, this is were he dreams of going come September for 3 years to learn Forest Management and everything from ground level up... he passed the interview with flying colours.... my boy shone.... I was very proud..... they offered him a place subject to his GCSE exam results, which are just starting now (another reason I aint been around.. Ive been helping him with his revision)... well 2 weeks after his interview day he was invited back to the college for a 'hands on day'... so I took the day off work from me nippers and drove to Winchester and dropped him off at the college for his day...

It was not worth driving all the way home only to have to return around 4 to pick him back up..... so, I thought I would make a day of it meself in Winchester..... this is the first day in probably 26 something years that I got to spend a day on me own wandering around with no nippers in tow, with no responsibility for anyone but meself..... I so aint use to doing anything on me own lol....

So I drove back to Winchester City Centre which is about 4 miles or so from the college and eventually found the carpark.... I say eventually cos Winchester is built around a oneway system and I always get lost and end up going round and round and round. On the interview day, me and Jacob spend 20 minutes on the one-way system on the same roads, I wanted to cry but we both ended up laffing so much that I just stopped in the middle of the road with frustration...having passed the same policeman on the same corner for the 4th time lol...... all the traffic was building up behind us, and the jolly nice copper took pity on our plight and GOT IN MY CAR to show us the way off the one way system LMFAO....... he ended up laffing to.... but what a nice man :)

For those that dont know it, my little village actually comes under the blanket of Winchester, its to whom I pay my taxes etc.... its well posh lol..... it was also many many moons ago the Capital of Great Britain before London was.... its the most beautiful historical place ever..... overflowing with beautiful buildings and the Cathedral is to die for....

I wanted to go to the Cathedral which is just a snippet away from the shops.... ya see, I dont really like shopping lol.... except Winchester does have a few very unusual shops and not just all the big shops, and all the shops are in buildings of which some are 2-3 hundred years old.... so for someone like me that LOVES history and social history I was a little in me element.... me maties would of taken the piss out of me for walking around with me head up above the shop fronts just gazing at the old buildings.....

Let me show you an example..

I mean, where else do ya know where Starbucks is in a building dated 1720 :)

And look at this building for a pizza house lol....Its called 'God Bagot House'.... these are really old buildings not fake for show but the actual ancient buildings in Winchester.

The main part of the shopping area is to narrow for cars so its pedestrians only.. you can see why from the below photo looking up the high street..

This is just a tiny view of some of the old buildings, note the busker on the left of the photo.... I love street buskers and always give a few bob if they are good...

Now how about that for a clock :)note the date 1713...

I took so very many more photos of the shops but I dont wanna bore ya :)

I wandered in and out of some of the more unusual shops, but I soon became bored with shops lol.... told ya I aint into shopping (see how low maintenance I am lol) unless its buying pressies for people.... inbetween the shops is a tiny alleyway that leads behind the shops and hopefully towards the Cathedral....

Past this pub, I so would of liked to of gone in for a drink lol but cant really do that on ones own... they might of thought of was a lady of the night LOL

This is the first view of the Cathedral as you get past the pub.... its godsmacking, and sucks the breath right of ones body... or maybe its just me lol

And this is just the boring end of the Cathedral, it is so big that it wouldnt fit into the shot yet I was right across the green away..... it is after all the longest Cathedral in the whole of Europe..

This is the main end.......

ya see....... I dont do god, but love with a passion churches and Cathedrals and all the architecture and grace and power and overwhelming sense of belonging when Im in a church.... aint that strange lol.... I was on a mission on that day..... I told me maties that I was gonna sit in the Cathedral and 'God' if there was one would know where to find me..... and part of me was hoping that something would happen and he would single me out LOL oh shut it, I know, I know crazy right LOL

Anyways the Cathedral is set in beautiful grounds surrounded on all sides by houses that overlook the green....... you have to be mighty rich to live in Winchester... rich and dam posh of which Im neither.....

So I sat on a bench with me book.... I love to people watch.. it was a little overcast but it was just so lovely to have this time to meself with me book in beautiful surroundings.....

These are the houses that surround the Cathedral..... just fancy living in such splender..... with such history surrounding you....

This is one side of the green....

I love my passion for the history of my country...... my maties dont have it.... Im an oddball amongst my friends...... but then, Ive never been one to follow the crowds... I like being unique lol..... I dont have much choice, I am who I am.... take me or leave me lol

The morning was very overcast and I was getting a bit nippy sitting on the bench on the green with me book and people watching.... I had finished me cuppa coffee and I was cold, and after all I had come to the Cathedral on a mission, so I hobbled over to the main doors......

Just look at that..... it takes my breath away just looking at it..... see the little door on the left with the board. thats where ya go in...... ya see, you have to pay to actually go into this Catheral.... its a fiver which is about $10.... but on that signboard it does say that no one is refused and if you want to go in for private prayer or other reasons then you just ask at the information desk inside and someone will take you in and help you with your problems....... oh they so didnt wanna know about my problems lmfao......

So, I did know you have to pay to go in to wander around this most amazing of all buildings..... its been years since Ive been in there.... but I know I was in for a treat..... so I wandered in paid me fiver and just sat in stunning silence gazing at this most spectacular building...... its huge, I mean you cant really fathom it in the following photos..... but, if ever I get a doodle come visit, I will take ya there.... and for someone like me that dont do god, well..... at that exact moment I so wanted to be able to...... I was almost begging him inside to come and find me LOL

Anyways I was sitting there before I was gonna wander around when I noticed little groups of people gathering around someone, so being the nosey git that I am, I crept closer to see what the fuss was about......

Hello this bloke said, have you come for the tour..... oh, I say.... sorry I dont do god..... you dont have to he says, the tour is for all, and its free, and I could do with you on my side to make up the numbers lol - so what brings you here he said besides not doing god.... so without going into to much detail I explains I had dropped me lad off at Sparsholt and I had a huge pulling to come to the Cathedral and see if the man himself would find me.... for some reason this made the bloke laff lol I also said I had just not long finished reading The Pillars Of The Earth which was the most beautiful book I have ever read.... and its about the building of a Cathedral and the story was set in medievil times and based around the local area of where I live and Winchester..... he said he had read that book and that he too thought it was beautiful....... there was 7 people in our little party.... and the tour bloke asked me if I would like to tag along.... so I thought what the heck, Im sure it must be more informative being told about the many wonderful things in the Cathedral then just wandering around meself.....

This is Reg the tour guide, he has been a very high up council member in his time and patron to many organisations and believe it or not was even something to do with our village schools...and his passion for his local area just oozed out of him.... AND his name was Reg and that was my fathers name, so maybe it was a sign LOL - Only this man I could tell had a gentle soul lol...... the others in our little group was really into religion so I did feel a little out of place, but, if ya cant beat them I say join them lol...

I have hundreds of photos so bare with me LOL I just wish I had a better camera.... cos me photos have come out crap lol..... but if you google Winchester Cathedral you might get better information and photos....

This is the huge stained glass window that is at the front of the Cathedral..... it was so amazing, so beautiful, so colourfull, so bloody old lol

Did you know that Cathedrals are built in the shape of a cross.... and this huge one had other wings off of it, it was like a rabbit warren........ and ya know what, for someone that dont do god, it sure had a calming affect on me, and for a few hours all me worries and troubles of life just seemed to be packed away and forgotten....

The others on our little tour all asked sensible questions lmfao.... but not me.... I wanted to know if different things.... I think Reg took a shine to me, he kept laffing at me everytime I opened me mouth to ask something....I was just me, no more and no less.

Just look at part of the ceiling, it felt like one had been swallowed by a dinosaur and ya was staring at its ribcage lol..... Reg just smiled at me when I said this lol I think he might of thought I had escaped from some loonie bin.... what is it with people shaking there heads at me and smiling lol

The pictures of mine so dont do this place justice.... but here is a little snippet of the inside of the Cathedral that left me at times speechless.. you cant tell by my crappy photos just how huge a scale everything was.... stunning..

There were many many beautiful stainglass panels all over the outer walls.... I would LOVE to learn how to make them......

There was also many of these.... cant remember the name of this bloke but so many important historical figures buried inside Winchester Cathedral....

Im glad I tagged onto the little tour.... old Reggie was a mind of information.... he was brilliant....

This font is over 600 years old.... or was it made in 600AD I cant remember now lol

I bet ya didnt know that Jane Austen is buried in the Cathedral, she is just plonked there in one of the walk ways, it was strange walking over the graves, I had visions of a hand coming out and grabbing me and dragging me in lol...... I asked Reggie if her body was actually there or was it just a memorial plague thing and he said, no, all the engraved floor stones have the bodies of the people under them.... and believe me there was loads of the buggers.... if ya didnt walk on them ya would be hopping and dancing around so it was easier just to be brave and walk on them, after all, they couldnt feel ya lol they are only an old pile of bones....

There were many of this little side chapels with their own little altars.... I looked in everyone and lingered a little behind the others...... Reggies asked if I was alright and I said sure I was, I was just hoping that this 'god bloke' might show up and find me lol....... oh hush Reg I had to say, stop with the smiles...... oh he will find you in his own time he said..... I think he needs you....... GULP... talk about putting the willies up someone lol

This one is for JBelle.... dont know why but this little figure left me speechless and I stood staring at it for about 10 minutes.... I couldnt take my eyes off it...

These old paintings were discovered 200 years ago I think the bloke said, but dont quote me on that.... they were discovered when they was doing up this little chapel and a bit of the old painting paster fell off only to find that there were much older paintings underneath the already 300 year old paintings..... bloody amazing I tell ya to be looking a paintings that were painted all those years ago....

All handcarved from stone, it was huge.... jebus it was beautiful..

This bloke was a very important figure in British History..... been dead a while though lol

Another little side chapel......... aint it strange, I dont do God as such, but in my kitchen I have a 130 year old church altar table and 10 foot church pew that I LOVE with a passion.... I sometimes run my fingers over it and will HIM to come find me lol ya know, give me a sigh....... but he never does...... I dont think he wants me LOL Im probably more trouble then Im worth LOL

Apparently these are the oldest handmade tiles anywhere in the whole world.... and they aint even roped off, ya can just walk on them..... I touched them with my fingers and imagined all the millions of people that had walked on them....

This was strange this little side chapel had the most brightest painted ceiling which was different from the other plain stone ceilings... the shapes on the stone carvings tell a story, or so Reggie said, but I cant remember what it was not..... oye, I aint a bloody memory bank ya know......

I had to laff at this one.... Reggie asked our little group what was different about this one..... to which I replied....Richard Fox seems to be holding his nuts to protect them LOL...... jebus I thought Reggie was gonna have a heart attack he laffed so hard lol...... the right answer would of been that the statue was carved with him naked, and nuffin to do with nut clutching lol

Just look at this, all carved from stone..... speachless..

I had to laff at this one.... apparently there use to be quiet a few of this little coffins balanced up high dotted around the place, and 100s of years ago they were lifted down to clean or something and the old work men that were asked to do it dropped the buggers and all the old crumbly bones got mixed up, so they couldnt tell who was who so they just swept them up and placed them all in this one lol

This is the list of who is in there lol..... well old or what...... I think Winchester Cahtedral was built in 600 and something..... old or what :)

Even though this is a crap photo, this wall of carvings which was HUGE was the most stunning thing I have ever EVER seen in my life..... EVER.... it is undescribable....

sigh....

This was a more modern sculpture in the little fishman chapel.... I would of liked to of nicked this as a sovenier but I couldnt bring meself to do it LOL

Well 2 hours into the tour and there was still so much to see, but dear old Reggie had other commitments and said he would leave us to wander the rest on our own.....

I shook his hand and said fanks for the most enjoyable afternoon... and he said...... NO, thank you for your company and making the afternoon a mixture of unusal questions and laughter and if I ever wanted a job he would dearly love me to be his sidekick... WTF is that suppose to mean lmfao.....

I was sad to leave the little party.... at first these religious nuts done me head in with their boring questions and their knowledge of all things godly, but I had come to appreciate their knowledge and love for what they believed in.... I would be sad to see them depart.... well, all except the tosser with the big nose that just kept telling me to be quiet LOL... tosser....

So I wandered around a little on me own and I discovered down a side aisle some old stone stairs.... so I hobbled very carefully up them one at a time, cos by now me dodgy knee had just about had it lol..... but oh my Im so glad I did..... upstairs is the old library.... this wonderous place of the most ancient books in the whole land, and some even in the whole world......... it was like going back in time....

I had only just taken this photo when I was almost jumped upon by 2 guards lol well guards of the books which must of been about 84 years old, like they would guard anything lol........ please no photos, it could damage the books..... dam, and I hadnt even taken photos of the oldest.... but at least I got one shot..... in the adjoining room way up in the heavens of the Cathedral was a musuem room with some of the oldest hand written and hand decorated bibles in the Britain, going back to 600ad.... all behind glass they were so very rare and so very beautiful..... HUGE.... with that beautiful old writings...... not for the first time that day I lost the ability to speak LOL

As I started towards the stairs I heard the most beautiful music and heavenly voices coming from downstairs and when I look, well hung over the parapit I could see this..

Upon investigation I found out it was the musicians and chorus practising for the up and coming easter service......

If there is a heaven then this is what the music must sound like, it was the most beautiful music and voices I had ever heard, even better then James Blunt lol

All to soon it was time to leave, but I wanted to nip over to the gift shop and have a butchers, usually gift shops at places are cheap and tackie and a waste of money.. but I followed the sign to a little 300 year old building and oh my I was so not disappointed....... it was filled with beautiful if not a little expensive things.... I never spend money on me except for the odd CD, but I did treat meself to this.....

Its a little sealing wax and stamper, so those that ever get a proper hand written letter from me, will in future get my seal of approval LOL I just LOVE it...

When I came out of the shop to make my way back to the carpark, the sun came out, it was overcast and cold when I first went into the Cathedral and now it was brilliant sunshine and warm..

Tis a sign I tell ya......

I made me way back to the carpark to find that my parking fees were 15 quid lol thats like $30, usually I would of sworn at that price, but on that day, I didnt care, cos it was the most wonderful day I had had for such a long time....

I picked me lad up to be told that the college were so impressed with him, with his ability on the day, his passion, and his compassion and empathy for some of those less able on the day that they said, its not often that someone like Jacob comes along and fits like a glove into a college course, and they want to offer him a place irrespective of his exam results, and if he dont make the grades he can resit them at college with their help......... so, my boy has got his future next few years on a plate...... tis a long way to go everyday.... but I think he has found a passion that will stand him in good stead for the future......

Ok, I doubt anyone has read this far lol........ like Im bovvered......

To much Twaddle on a very wet overcast Monday afternoon....

x

That Will Learn Him..

2009-04-13T10:21:00.004Z

Ok..... I cant believe its been a fortnight since me last post...... all I can say is life has been non stop.... plus the schools are off for Easter break and Ive been out most days with nippers in tow and hospital appointments and college appointments in Winchester and Birthdays......and of course the aweful bloody course work....argghhhh

Anyways the weather has been fairly good of late, just a few overcast days for a few days, but last week our Sam asked if I could lend him £30 ($60) cos him and his mates wanted to bugger off to the new forest and camp for the weekend and he was skint, as per usual..... so me thinking it would be nice to have a weekend without him hanging around the house with all his band mates eating me out of house and home it might be easier to give him the dosh and get rid of him and the group for a few days.....

And I didnt really mind cos he has had a bit of a ride at the hospital back and forth with his burns..... I dont know if I told anyone but months ago his car (which is now off the road until he gets a job - I bought it and tax and insured it for a whole year but now its down to him - hence it sits at the bottom of me garden lol aint I mean) was overheating and the inexperienced young driver that he is, he thought it would be a good idea to take the radiator cap off (WTF) and the boiling radiator water shot up out of the radiator and all over his arm and caught his chin and ear...... the burns on his arm were touch and go whether he would need skin grafts, but HE decided no way, and its only been lately that they are beginning to look fairly normal.......

See, I dont share everything in life.... but you can see why sometimes I go on overload lol

So I says, ok, but you make sure you sort out the tent and whatever it is you need, but most importantly make sure you bring it back...... cos last time one of mine buggered off with their mates, not only did they leave behind one of me tents but also a wetsuit and a sleeping bag.....Arrggggghhhhhhhhh

Anyways, we have loads of tents in this house, all different, some real old ones that me lads take to music festivals cos it dont matter so much if they get ruined, and we have some real nice tents that I use to use as a helper on the school camps and when we use to just up and bugger off to cornwall for a few days....... and of course I have me special tent that I bought a few years ago that I blobbed about last year lol

So, Sam didnt mention again about the camping so I presumed it was all off, ya know how fickle teenagers can be...... except, come Friday after I had had an exhausting day in Winchester with Jacobs College stuff and Cathedral wandering......

Sam burst in the back door with 2 mates in tow and said, quick mum find me a tent... as we do not have attic space cos we have 2 bedrooms where the loft once was, all the tents and gear are kept in the bottom of the huge wardrobe in my bedroom....

Sam, get it yourself I says.... but mum, you know which is which and I dont wanna take the wrong one..... Sam GET IT YOURSELF your just being a lazy git...... but, I have to sort me other stuff out he says......... aint my problem Sam youve had days to sort everything out...... and Im knackered so sod off and get it yourself and dont forget to sort out a sleeping bag and roll mat or camp bed and something to cook on.......

He disappeared upstairs with his 2 mates in tow, after about 20 minutes he comes back down and says.......... did you sort me out a tent mum?....... by now I almost told him he wasnt gonna bloody go, but I kept me calm cos I was just thinking of a weekend without him and his band here LOL.... semi piece and quiet, no band practise no 6 foot extra lads invading me house..... so I says very calmly...... ok, ok ObloodyK I'll sort one......

Thanks mum he said, I love you and then burst out laffing...... he can wrap me around his little finger that boy....

Anyways they lobbed all the stuff in the back of his maties car and with a wave and a HUGE smile from me they headed off......... it was £30 ($60) well spent LOL....

Oh little did he know lmfao..

Three hours later I get a text from our Sam, it read....... I DONT THINK YOUR FUNNY BUT I EXPECT YOU THINK ITS HILARIOUS - love Sam x

Oh yes, I was laffing alright....... my well hard, extreme skateboarder, son wasnt so hard that weekend........

Not when you consider he was camping in this.......

HAHAHAHAHAHA That will learn him......... I only packed me pink flowery tent with matching sleeping bag LOL....

Not so macho now then sonny lol......... and yes it was warm enough for T-shirts but NOT for bare chested...... if you look at the photo its cold enough for him to be sucking in all his muscles cos of the cold and you can see all his ribs LOL.....

Maybe next time he will sort his own stuff out LOL - LOVE still being able to 'get one over' on me lads... they do it to me all the time, I do have to have some pay back :)

ok, enough boring Twaddle for a sunday Bank Holiday Monday..... NO NIPPERS woooo hooooo :) - hope its sunny where ever you are today..

x

You Use To Be A Beautiful Baby - And - By The Skin Of His Teeth

2009-03-30T08:19:00.012Z

Ok...... well everyone that knows me knows how much I love me chickens.... it drives me maties here crazy, cos, to be honest, they DONT DO animals of any description.... and me matie Ann, well, she has this fear of birds, daft cow lol....

My chickens are wellabit spoilt, I buy them lavendar or lemon scented sawdust for the bottom of their bedroom in the coop and then I fill it up with warm snuggly herby scented hay LOL..... my chickens come out of their coop in the morning smelling like they have spent a night in a brothel.....

They all bring me such joy, I could sit in me garden and just watch them for hours, when Im stressed out, which has been a lot of late, I take me cuppa tea and go sit on the bench in the garden and me chickens bring me back down to earth....... no 'shop ya stress away' for me.... just sitting amongst the chicken poo and sharing me marmite toast with them, see how low maintenance I really am LOL

Do you remember the hatching of Marble back in October, when it was bitter cold and still I let mother nature run its course and let Mabel the mum warm and protect the chick instead of bringing them both into the warm kitchen in a box......

Well, little Marble is no longer a cute little fluffy chick...... he/she, but we are thinking more a he as the weeks go on... is now a big as its mum...its a tad crazy and skitsie and gets a right proper peck from its Auntie Janet when it gets to greedy....

It use to be a beautiful baby, but it sure is one ugly teenager LOL

And and even ugly looking young adult..

But ya see, no matter if Marble does turn out to be a cockeral, which I think it might be, cos it has shiney feathers like Cedric and has the beginnings of those purplely/green tail feathers, I will still keep him and Marble and Cedric will just have to learn to get on with each other, cos I loves my little Marble, its like me first born LOL

My chickens hang around together all day, they are never more then a few feet apart, sometimes they can be a pain in the arse, like NOW for instances, they have dug up all me perennials which I will have to replace, so I thought I would have to pen them down in the bottom half of me garden, still a large area for free chickens, so I went to B&Q and bought the most lovely picket gate and the hinges and thought I would put a gate up near the shed to stop them coming this end of the garden and destroying the rest of me plants....... So, last week I let them out of their coop and shut the new gate which is about 4 foot high and went out for the morning, happy in the knowledge that I could buy some new plants and they would not be dug up and scratched out by me chickens........

This is us buying the picket gate, thats Sprite, D and J... who says shopping with 3 under 3s is hard :)

WRONG..... when I came back home I opened me side gate and there was Cedric and Janet sitting on me back door step THIS SIDE OF THE GATE..... boy, did I tell them off, they must of missed me so much that they made a mad escape and must of fluttered up onto the gate (which must of been hard cos they are fatties) and where sitting there waiting for my return with a smug look on their faces...... after checking and opening the new gate I walked back up the garden talking to the pair of them in a cross voice....LOL and was explaining to them that they are NOT allowed this end of the garden and to bloody well get their arse back down the garden and through the gate, as they started to waddle off I quickened me step and made shooing noises, much to Cedrics annoyance lol he started with the back chat and noise at me as he picked up pace.... again I was giving him a piece of me mind when he decided to hop onto the gate and then onto the bloody 6 foot fence.... LMFAO..... little sod, he was determined to state his case and not go back without a fight LMFAO....

So I shooed Janet in through the gate and shut it and then went to pick Cedric off the fence.....

He was having none of it..... he fluttered down into me twat neighbours garden LOL.....dam and bugger, time for reinforcements..... I ran, well hobbled back to the house and shouted for Sam and Jacob to come quick.... Sam easily climbed over the fence and then from his side said, dammit, mum, Cedric's hopped over into the next garden........... and with that, we heard the most scariest noise that I have ever heard a chicken make and the growling of the little terrier dog that lives there..... Cedric was being attacked..... but he was putting up a good fight, boy could that cockeral run.... I screamed real loud from my side of the fence and both Sam and Jacob leapt over the other fence into the garden where Max the terrier lives and who by now had Cedric in his mouth...... the lady that lives there came rushing out, she to was screaming cos she could hear me screaming, I felt helpless this side of the fence..... Sam apparently without fear grab Max the dog by his neck and bashed him on the nose with the palm of his hand and the dog dropped Cedric, who at first lay there where he was dropped..... I by then had run/hobbled down me garden and in through the bottom of me neighbours garden (2 gardens along) thinking that my Cedric had been ripped to pieces, already the tears were rolling down me face...... the dog had been shut in the house and I could see feathers everywhere..... Jacob said, its ok mum, he is still alive, go get a towel, so I hobbled back through the gardens in floods of tears.... wishing I had clipped the chickens wings which would of stopped their ability of fluttering up over the fence in the first place..... as I hobbled back down the garden with towel in hand I heard my Sam in the twat neighbours garden saying, mum I'll pass Cedric over the fence and then climb over....

I dont know why this photo has come out so dark (ok photo swapped fanks LadyStyx for making me photo lighter) that thats our Sam climbing back over the fence and Jacob who had come the sensible way and through the back gate LOL

I heard me twat neighbour shuffling down his garden, just as Sam jumped back over the fence into our garden.......whats going on he said from his side of the fence....... nuffin we said in unison lol.... was you in my garden, he said.... nope we all said in unison..... with that we quietly tiptoed back up our garden and left the loon talking to himself LOL

I checked Cedric all over.... he was missing all his tail feathers and his bum was bare with a couple of bite marks on his arse.... so not knowing what to do I just put antiseptic cream on the bites and hugged him and give him a kiss and a right proper telling off and put him to bed.... hoping against all hope that he would not die of shock during the night.....

This is Cedric before, with his beautiful tail feathers.....

and, yes Cedric did survive the night..... by the skin of his teeth he survived....

This is Cedric now with what is left of his tail feathers...LMFAO.. I know they will grow back, I know he had a lucky escape... I know now I need to think about clipping his and the others wings..... and now I know just how much I love him.... aint I bloody pathetic lmfao....

As a treat the following day.... I gave them all a slice of chocolate cake.... one of their favourites lol..... note Cedrics tail-less bum lmfao.....

Oh, and cheese, did I mention they love cheese for their breakfast some mornings....

I could go on and on and show hundreds of photos and tell stories about me chickens, but I will save them for another day.....

Its bright and sunny here today with a nippy start.... looks like its gonna be a lovely spring day..... I need to make the most of it......

Enough boring Twaddle for one morning...

x

ps...... Fanks (((((Starr))))) you know what for.... feet - earth - ground.. oxo

Addition - a couple of other photos that I couldnt find this morning....

An Unexpected Visitor...Again...

2009-03-20T19:57:00.015Z

Ok....... long boring post.... but like Im bovvered if you read it or not lol - oh and the boxes o'crap will be posted off in the morning.... sorry about the delay... but tough tittie, Ive been busy LOL

Bugger me what a week..... up to me eyes in this below...

I cant believe I decided to do a 2 year college course in 9 months at home whilst trying to work and sort the house and garden and everything home here lol...

See that huge folder with the few notes, well it will be full to bursting by the time I will of finished this qualification... 2 out of 11 papers done and dusted with high credits :).... maybe Im cleverer then I think I am lol

Its taking over me life.... hours and hours of bloody work, and assessments and the assessor sitting in on my day taking observations.... I WISH I HAD NEVER STARTED lol

Sooooo thats just one tiny excuse as to my disappearance....

Its been beautiful spring weather here this past week and hopefully it will continue into the weekend..... Ive been trying to put all me bank accounts and saving accounts in order for when the time comes to rob peter to pay paul when I loose Sprite and J in a fortnight... Im brill at juggling little income and Im usually at me most creative when Im skint LOL.... fank gawds I DONT have one penny of debt except me little mortgage, and I do have a little bit of savings hidden in me hiking boots lol.....

I might have to sell me body down the Guildhall behind the lion statues, but when I thought about it, I doubt I would even earn enough for me busfare home LOL

Anyways..... does anyone remember last year and this post dear little chewy that we saved from me cat...... go look at the lovely photos in this old post..

Well, about 3 weeks ago we had another MOUSE incident.... this time it was Ambrose that came galloping in through the catflap carrying a squeeling wriggling little dormouse..... I shouted at me cat at the top of me voice, and it scared her so much she opened her mouth and the mouse fell to the floor and ran under the washing machine.... there was nuffin I could do to get the little mouse out..... I thought the cats would eventually catch it and there will be nuffin I can do...... but, catch the mouse they didnt..... it must of crept out at night and stole and nibbled their food and drank their water.... and as the days went by I forgot about the little dormouse that was living under me washing machine...... UNTIL.... I was in me kitchen late one night bunging the kettle on for a cuppa tea..... as I stood there waiting for it to boil, I watched as a little tiny dormouse crept along me kitchen window sill and behind me toaster where it sat nibbling on toast crumbs.......

Bloody hell..... argghhhhhhhhhh no matter how much I like cute little mices there is NO WAY a dam mouse was gonna have the free run of me kitchen........ and when I found a little mouse poo on the window sill THAT WAS IT.... its fate was sealed....it had to go.... I called all 3 of me cats (yes we now have 3, thats another story lol) to which they all came running into the kitchen thinking they was getting a treat...... I picked fatcat up and placed him on the kitchen sink where the mouse was staring back at me from the window sill....it was a big mistake... all hell then broke loose lmfao......the cats went crazy knocking dishes into the sink and stuff onto the floor, the poor mouse ran for its life and I screamed and hobble jumped onto the kitchen pew LOL..... Jacob and Sam came running only to both climb on the pew with me lmfao..... to dam funny....

we watched as the 3 cats sat infront of the washing machine pawing under to try and get the mouse, but as we watched, it crept along the base of the kitchen units behind the daft cats LMFAO..... and through the babygate across the kitchen door and behind some of the toy boxes in this middle room.....

This was now all out war....

This is Sam after pulling out a few of the toy boxes, everytime I said 'there it is' he screamed like a girlie lmfao.....

We didnt catch the mouse that night.... but it continued to leave mice poo on the window sill so I knew it was still alive and I was constantly anti-bacterial washing all the units down in the kitchen....

It had to go, it was doing me head in, it was getting to clever... it had found its way into me popping corn.... I didnt want it to die though, I aint that cruel, but it had to be caught..... so, I went down to our village hardware shop and saw the bloke that works in there, he thinks Im mad most of the time as it is, but this day he must of thought I was mental LOL

This is our little hardware shop.....

He says, hey Mel what ya after... Im always in and out of this little shop for the odd nail or screw or to get a key cut (that is another story), or to just give him hassle LOL.... so I says..... I have a mouse, its been in me kitchen now for over a week, and its getting crafty and its clever and I WONT LET IT WIN.... I want a mouse trap.... ok he says and he brings me out a traditional mouse trap that ya put cheese on a spring trap and when the mouse grabs it, it flips and crushes the poor little mouse to death... thats 2 quid he says...... BLOODY HELL I reply, I aint no murderer, I want one of those humane traps Ive seen on the telly, I'll catch the mouse and take it up the woods and let it go..... oh he says one of those.... well, those are 4 pounds 50 ($9).... jebus I say, the cost of being humane and kind and caring to little creatures is ridiculas.... thats more then double the price of snapping the little mousie git in half and squashing its guts out.... yep it says, being kind is expensive and he laffs knowing full well I would buy it whatever the price....

So I take it home stuff the end with cheese and ham and a love heart sweet so that the mouse would have a variety of things to choose from lol and I placed the little trap where I thought it would walk on its way to the toaster.... 2 days and nuffin...well I say nuffin, the treats in the trap had gone but no trap had been sprung and no mouse caught..... I told the bloke in the shop that I wanted me money back cos the trap aint worked, he just laffed at me and said they dont do refunds and just to give it time, so I replaced all the treats and waited and waited.... and both me and Sam stood one night in the kitchen and watched the dam mouse run over the top of the trap LOL..... we chased that dam mouse all over the kitchen side that night and eventually we cornered the little bastard behind me KenwoodChef LOL and shoved the open trap in the only little gap where the mouse could escape......

DONE AND DUSTED..... we caught the little bleeder.....now to tease the cats and to teach the mouse a lesson...

Take that you peskie little mouse.....

And if I could be bovvered to scare you I would LOL....

Now what to do with the mouse..... Sam suggested putting it in something bigger, so what did he do, he only went and got our FRIBBLE glass that me and Jacob stole oops, I mean borrowed from a burger joint whilst we was in Maine....

See aint he cute....

Anyone would of thought Sam had slain a lion instead of just catching a little dormouse lol

Now we can never use the stolen oops borrowed Fribbles Glass, cos its had a mouse in it...

It was late and we didnt want to let the mouse go in the back garden cos we knew one of the cats would stalk it and catch it, so Jacob suggested he put it in one of his empty lizard glass thingies.... and keep it for a few days to make sure it was ok and then we could let it go..... thought that was a great idea, and that way the minded nippers could watch the little mouse in the glass cage for a few days and they could learn about wild animals lmfao.... sounds like Im talking bout a bear or moose LOL..... so the little mouse was put in this....

The poor dormouse spent 2 days being hounded by nippers and me cats, eventually Jacob took it upstairs to the quiet of his bedroom.....

I forgot all about the mouse for a few days and when I remembered I said to Jacob.... do you still have the mouse..... no he said....... did you let it go, I said...... no he said..... dont say the cats got it...... no he said...... well where the bloody hell is the mouse, I said...... its dead he said....... dead? I say...... after all we went through its dead? WTF..... how?...... he said he didnt want it to get cold so he turned the heat pad on which he use to use for one of the scorpions when it was in the glass thing....... oh that was nice I said......... only the stupid mouse chewed through the wire and electricuted itself he said....... a fortnight of hassle and mouse poo and chasing the dam thing around the house, a now useless stolen, oops borrowed Fribble glass and 4 pound 50 pence ($9) wasted..... I asked him what he had done with the mouse, he said..... I fed it to me lizard LMFAO......

RIP little dormouse, I tried to save you, but you were your own worse enemy....

I told the bloke in the hardware shop yesterday... well actually I was just walking past and he came rushing out and asked me about the mouse.... he laffed and laffed.... yep he said, sounds about right for your mad house......

HOW RUDE lol

Enough boring Twaddle for a dark Friday Spring Evening.....

x

Tiz Been A Fortnight And The Winner Is.....

2009-03-10T09:54:00.010Z

Ok, so its been just over a fortnight, what with tonsilillitis and a chest infection of which I am still coughing and snotting up buckets of lime green slime :).... and with me NV Q3 course hard work and loads of stuff and nonsense going on here and the near death of Cedric, its seems an age since I promised a box of scrummies.....

Anyways, fanks to everyone for all your kind words, I always find kind words hard to swallow, so, DONT BE SO NICE IN FUTURE...... :)

I cant believe so many of you commented in the hope of winning a box of crapo bits and bobs from Jolly old lol.....

I will say that I had been gathering in the goodies and scrummies, and as fast as I gathered me lads munched and ate the gathered goods LMFAO....

So last night I thought I had better get this done and dusted... so instead of one box of scrummies I will send 4 smaller boxes.......

So I printed off everyones name cos I couldnt be arsed to hand write them all lol and just look, I even stamped out a shape next to everyones name :) - like I aint got enough to do, but thats me, always the creative one LOL....

I put all the little folded names (with stamped out shape) into one of me favourite little bowls.........

Drum rolls...........and the winners of the little box of crappo are.......

Cindy - SomeBlokeThatBlobs - LadyStyx - JeanC

So if you wanna drop me your proper address to marmitetoasty@yahoo.com and give me a week to regather in some bits and then a week for the postman to swim across the water with your goodies, you will be very disappointed LMFAO.... oh no, it couldnt be some bloody brit that won, it had to be a doodle..... just make it more expensive why dont ya :)

Ive won 2 give-aways before on blobs...... one was on FamilyPhils Blob yonks ago, I named his gnome and won a CD...... and then just a few weeks ago, I was blobbing around and came across a quilting blob place that took me eye.... and I left a comment and bloody hell, low and behold I actually won the giveaway...... and oh my what the most amazing giveaway....

Just look at all that lovely fabric and a book, yep the blobber is famous Elizabeth has had a book published and she even sent me a copy of her book AND she enclosed two moose horn buttons cos she had read me blob and knew me passion for mooses..... the enclosed letter made me smile and made me tear up.......

So, it just goes to show, ya can connect with like minded funny people on the net, and ya can win moose buttons :) - FANKS again Elizabeth for the wonderful give-away..... makes my box of crap look pathetic LOL I aint decided what to include yet either lol like in life I will just go with the flow :)....

Much has happened this past week..... I was very poorly of course and I think THIS is the cause......

Pod was wellabit poorly a couple of weeks ago.......

Yep gallons of puke lmfao EVERYWHERE...... I had to call his dad to come get him and then I went down with sickness so I BLAME pod lol

Also Sprites father was made redundant yesterday which of course has a knock on affect to me, cos after doing 4 weeks notice I wont be having Sprite and her brother unless the father can find another job, which in this recession is unlikely.... so that means that my income will drop by 2 thirds, they were my bread and butter earnings...... dont know what Im gonna do, but Im sure I will muddle through as I always have..... priority MORTGAGE we dont need to eat LOL.... least I dont owe one penny in debt...

But to cap it all, my Ben who only came back from a weekend away in Amsterdam yesterday and who also works for the same Engineering company as Sprites father, was also made redundant...... OH BLOODY JOY...... and over here dole money is only $90 so we are all in the shit LOL..... I will have to somehow try and carry everyone again, just dont ask me how, cos I have NO idea.....

Maybe sell up and move to the states and buy something outright and start up some business there?........

And get this, a dear matie has already offered to marry me so that I could get in the country :)...... I might just take him up on the offer....ya know, a marriage of convenience..... he would soon get fed up with me though LOL....to dam funny.... actually it was a lovely thought :)..... so fanks Chuck...

Ok...... I have me consultant this afternoon....... I aint mentioned much about it all of late in that department, mainly cos things are not good... but I sort of pulled me cardigan around me and just kept meself to meself...... to say Im a little scared about me appointment is an understatement..... will just have to see what he suggests, if anything, this afternoon....... sigh...

Ok, enough boring Twaddle for a Tuesday morning.... congrats those that have won the box of crap, dont forget to send me your addresses....

x

It Cant Be....... 2nd Blob Birthday....So Lets Have a Give Away...

2009-02-23T19:46:00.009Z

Ok........ I just aint had time to Twaddle of late...... so much has been going on here, I might explain over the coming weeks, if I decide to continue with Twaddling....

I cant believe its been 2 whole years since I was shoved into the world of blobbing kicking and screaming.... Up until just a few months before Twaddle was born, I didnt even have much of a clue as to what a blob was....

Bobs blob (over there in me side bar) was me first encounter of the blobbing world, and jebus, what a blob to start with LOL..... I will confess it did take me weeks and weeks of reading Tubob for me to even understand it lol....... at times I thought I was trying to read some alien language.... and then it dawned, slowly at first, that I was reading a 'master of words' and almost every few words I had to google the meaning of words LOL.....

But through Bobs Blob I then blob-encountered some people that have remained wonderful true friends ever since.... real people that have carved their way into me heart and soul (well me soul is still lost but they're in there wherever it is).... yes, me fellow 'Gumbies'.... you know who you are..... these Gumbies, I hope know, that I would do anything for them.... in whatever capacity I can at the drop of a hat...... they know I love em..... also through Bobs blob I was led to the Dingleberries Newspaper Site left of the Staples, where after a little bit of a rough start (a few thought I was not for real lol) I have been taken under their wing.... like on Bobs joint I have come across some wonderful people, and learnt to blob around, finding some very special people and blobs on there..... Even after I closed down the newspaper site for a while the crimbo before last with a bomb scare LOL..... to bloody funny... what? I didnt Twaddle about it LOL....... suffice to say, the bomb squad saw the funny side of it.... innocent I tell ya, I plead Im innocent

Anyways, I started Twaddle for two reasons, first of, cos I was bullied into it LOL.... and secondly so that I could maybe keep a diary so that one day when Im dead and gone, me lads might get to have a glimpse at a side of their mum that maybe they dont always get to see, and words that I dont always get to share....... except, they dont know about me blob so someone would have to give them the heads up if I snuff it LOL

Many people over the last 2 years have passed through here, many have stayed (I cant begin to understand why) and some have moved on and left or snuffed it......

Its been a funny 2 years, so much has gone on in this short time......... Ive often spilled to much of 'me' on here LOL..... ya see, believe it or not, Im really quite a private person, I do know that over this past couple of years, my 'well ard head' was allowed to become a bit soft, and it lead to me letting me guard down a bit and that made me a bit gullible ... ya see, Ive always been as tough as old nails, always only had me to rely on... always been the strong one..... cos Ive had to be......

Never underestimate the power of the blob world, when I found meself at the lowest point in me life, strangers that read Twaddle dragged me up by me short and curlies and kept me head above water, until I had the energy to blow up me armbands and stay afloat meself..... so I thank you for that...... you to know who you are.... those that I had no clue about held out a hand of friendship, and those that I thought I knew and needed to care, didnt give a stuff LOL and so the world turns...

I dont know how to be anyone but myself....... and those that I speak to or have spoken to on the phone know Im exactly the same as I am here LOL.....

So..... in honour of me 2nd blob birthday Ive decided to do a give-away...... I aint decided what to give away as yet LOL.... but it will probably be a box of well proper British goodies.......

So....... leave a comment on me 2nd birthday post (yes blurkers come out of the woodwork) and I will pick out a winner and send ya, whether ya near or far, a wonderful box of scrummies......

I wanna fank all those that come through Twaddle, those that make me laff and those that make me cry, those that make me think and those that made me love......Im not very good with words.... but many of you have touched the very core of my being........ and I always swore I would never let that happen....but, I let you become real.... was that a mistake? sometimes I wonder.... and so the world turns, and so peoples lives get entwinned and twist and turn and sometimes snap and get used and hurt in this blob world.....

Jebus, sounds like Im at the Oscars LOL

But through your blobs I have travelled the world via your stories and your amazing photos, I read the most amazing food blobs, and shared the most heart wrenching stories..... I have made wonderful friends in Canada and America and bloody hell, even some northern maties over here, and a jock lmfao.... and South Africa and the bloody Welsh LOL..... I have cried with you and laffed at your antics....... I even dragged two of me oldest internet maties into the blob world.... dont know if they think I did them a favour or not LOL

I hope that in some small way, be it only a tiny way I might of reached out and touched some of you...... cos I know so many of you have touched me...... not in that way you dirty bastards LOL

I am me, just me, cant and will never be anyone else........ those that I call friends know, I will be a friend for life.... I aint everyones cuppa tea but thats their problem not mine.... we cant be everything that others wished us to be, cos I know, I can only be meself...... Im honest and true and make the most amazing friend.... and I never say words or make promises I dont mean....

Ok, Im waffling a load of bollocks now lol........so, leave a comment and ya never know, maybe you might even win a box of crap from me LOL

Oh, before I go, just wanna share this picture of Sprite with you, oh and Pod and Dutchy...... Ive had Sprite since she was 10 weeks old 9 hours a day, 5 days a week...she will be 3 in May..... I love this child more then any other child I have ever minded......

These were taken today in me garden.... it was an almost spring like day, so we spent most of it outside.... a mucky kid is a happy kid, right? :)

This child today came up to me and said 'I lub you Meldee' :) she made my heart swell... at least someone loves me right LOL

Tiz such fun to get mucky :) - This is my darling Sprite and Dutchy (his mum is from Holland hence the nicname)... we had been digging for worms to feed to me chickens.... you can see by their faces how much love and fun I have to share..... I hope that I can build memories for them that they will keep forever...

Only had Pod for about 7 weeks now, I wonder if he will crawl and stay snuggled into my heart as much as Sprite has..... he holds out his arms to me, when his dad drops him off in the mornings.... I think he is happy here.....

So come on blobbers and blurkers........ you know you want the goodies LOL..... over 53,000 have sneaked in here over the past 2 years..... who would of thunk that :)

Slater maties x

I KNOW What I Saw... So Shut It :)

2009-02-14T19:52:00.007Z

Ok...... well, I suppose I should say happy valentines day to ya.... so, happy valentines day...

If you need a heart today, then take mine..... it dont work no more so you might as well make use of it LOL

Anyone that has been reading the weather news of late will know what fickle weather we have here in Jolly Old Blighty..... we are famous for moaning about the weather, well, actually, I dont, cos no amount of moaning is gonna change it LOL.... but to many Brits it is always a topic of conversation..... dont know what to talk about, then talk about the weather... thats how most think over here....

Well, a fortnight ago we was issued an extreme weather warning down here in the South of England.... and bugger me, we woke up Monday morning to SNOW everywhere, pure white crisp wellabit proper SNOW.... usually I would be as happy as larry about having snow, but cos of me dodgy knee, I was a little bit scared, and the thought of venturing out to take nippers to school was making me apprehensive....I rang me matie and said if I went over I would ring her and just lay there cos there is no way I would be able to get up LOL... she was laffing and saying that she wouldnt be able to help cos she would be wetting herself laffing..... now, thats not nice is it lol.... BUT, not to worry, after a few phone calls it was found that the schools in the village were shut......bloody shut cos of a little bit of snow LOL..... actually it was found that most of England has shut down cos of the snow....... it was the worst snowfall here in 18 years..... wooooo hooooooooo our country was in turmoil LOL...... ok, well down in the South the snow only lasted 2 days and then it had all disappeared lol

I did have to smile though thinking about me maties in the States and the snow they were experiencing there lol, Britain gets a few inches and we come to a stand still.....well I didnt mind, cos it means if the village schools are closed then I get extra work and extra work equals loads of extra dosh LOL

Anyway.... I turned the heating up higher so the house was all nice and snug and warm for nippers arriving....... and I hobbled down the garden to let me chickens out.... which in itself was funny cos they just stood in the coop looking out, daring each other to go first, so I walked back up the garden making that stupid clucking noise that chicken lovers make and they all followed me up the path and to me house, they carried on following me in the back door and right up to me fridge and stood there looking up at me..... so, seeing as it was cold and nippy I let them have some left over rice that was in the fridge and a couple of slices of ham for their breakfast then I shooed them back out the door......

I stood on me back step with eyes as huge as saucers......... oh my, oh my.... there was something wonderful in my garden..... something that to me was the most wonderful thing I could of seen......I shouted to my Jacob to come see, I shouted right proper loud...... JACOB COME QUICK COME AND SEE, OH JEBUS QUICK QUICK....

To my surprise me twat neighbour heard me shouting and hollered over the fence 'ARE YOU ALRIGHT OVER THERE'........yes, I shouted back, but, my goodness you should see whats in me garden....WHAT? he shouted..... I said, you wont have them in your garden cos my garden is more special LOL........ by now I was giggling..... I could hear him scurrying around and what sounded like a chair being dragged into his garden..... the nosey git was only gonna climb on a chair and look over the fence......

By now Jacob had come running down the stairs and was standing behind me looking out into the snowy garden......

Oh Jacob, just look, isn't it wonderful, isn't it just the bestest surprise to see them in our garden....... I turned around and saw the look on his face, a look of surprise that was for sure..... then I saw me twat neighbours little ugly puffy face peer over the fence..... What is it, he said........ look I said in the garden just past the garden table........ where? he replied........ I said, first there was one on its own and then more arrived........ what? he said, what you talking about?..... there I pointed, dont make a noise or you will scare them away....... I saw his head get higher over the fence, he must of been standing on tiptoe to get a better look.....

What? he said, I cant see anything.....gawds sake I say, there near the borders...... Jacob by now was giggling behind me.... I replied, first, when I let the chickens out this morning, when I walked back up the garden I could only see the one visitor and then within a few minutes more arrived until what must be the whole herd.....

Now me twat neighbour was staring straight at ME with that frowning look he often uses when talking to me...... then he looked back in me garden and muttered......... I dont know why I bother with you, I really think you are mad, how many times do I have to fall for your nonsense.......WHAT? I cry....... cant you see them.... look closely and you will see one on its own down the garden and 3 or 4 others just there by the deleafed fushia......

This is what was in me garden that snowy morning a fortnight ago....

Mel, those are NOT real he said........ of course they are real I said.... Ive seen a real moose in America when me matie Sharkie took us to this reserve place, so I KNOW what a moose looks like....

Mel, is there something wrong with you?.... those are NOT real mooses... I really think they should lock you up, I could of broken me neck if I had fallen off this chair..... well, I says, you shouldnt be such a nosey git then.... and they ARE real if you believe in them......... with that he clambered down and disappeared out of sight, but I could still hear him muttering....... I CAN HEAR YOU I SHOUT.... crazy he shouts back..... I turn to Jacob, you can see them cant you....... by now he was in fits of laughter and tears were rolling down his face.....

Here is the rest of the herd.....

I know to the untrained eye this herd of moose might look like a collection of little plastic mooses, and the one near the front on the right might look like the nodding moose that was found in the cereal box a few years ago, and the one at the back on the left might look like the moose that Family Phil's nippers sent me months back.... but they aint, that was a real herd of mooses in me garden a fortnight ago.......

I KNOW what I saw, I love mooses more then anything..... and these really were in me garden..... I DONT care what me twat neighbour thinks.....

Jacob whispered, do you think he thinks your mad mum..... I aint bovvered what he thinks Jacob I said..... I know what I saw *wink wink* with that he burst out laffing LOL

But, also look at this, we WILL get me neighbour back for saying Im mad..... we have a secret weapon, and come the summer when he is sitting in the garden having a nice cold beer in the sunshine..... our secret weapon will come into play..... and we will get the last laff......

Yep, dont get mad, get even, we have saved a SNOWBALL in the freezer and we are saving it for me twat neighbour in the summer LMFAO..... he who mocketh me will me smiling out of the other side of his snowball splattered face come the summer......

More then enough Twaddle for a dark Saturday evening....

x

Where Did January Go....

2009-02-04T14:17:00.015Z

Ok, bloody hell, where did January go....... well, I know for me its been full of paperwork and government papers and long days and restless nights........

Tiz not that I aint wanted to Twaddle..... its just I aint had time to scratch me bum let alone Twaddle or email or even do much blobbing around...... I did think that by the time I got to my age that maybe life might of been a bit kinder to me LOL....... I think sometimes I must live in a bloody dream world....

So...... what have I been up to..... first of all, from last September my job as a registered Ofsteded Childminder changed, and us in the know do not think it has changed for the best.... the powers that be seem to think so, but us backbones of our jobs think they are talking out of their arses.....

Ya see, they must have it wrong, because so many childminders are leaving by the 100s every month now in England.... tiz all the bloody paperwork now since we changed in September, this new EYFS shit that we have to comply with....... and to be honest, one could have the bestest paperwork in place and still be a shit minder and not treat the kids right with love and respect.... so its all bollocks if you ask me LOL

Anyways, I.... yes ME was to be the first inspected under the new rules and regulations, out of our gaggle of minders here in this village, so I was to be their guineapig.... their beating stick, their learning curve LOL.....

But guess what I did, I decided to redo all me 47 MUST HAVE policies that we as minders have to have in place for EACH child, plus 14 others that I HAVE to have for my home setting (obviously everyones home is different), but like a loon I decided to get it all up and done and dusted before me inspection, and redo all me 14 contracts that I have for each child......

Each of my minded nippers have a file like Sprites in the above photo, it contains 61 policies read and signed by parents, a law abiding contract (which is mainly for my protection)....

Ya see, in England minding aint like it is in the states, we are so regulated and checked up on and have to comply with all sorts of extra training and courses and we even have to have a dam policy if we sneeze to hard LOL..... OK, well thats just a joke, but thats how it feels sometimes....

I have to have a seperate file for each child with their contracts in.... child protection policies... observations of each child and the the next steps to seeing that child progress and how to achieve its own individual full potential....... we are now classed as educators and have set guidelines we HAVE to adhere to....

Well cos I use to own a preschool I know I have all the equipment in place to meet all these new rules and regulations but still its a nerve racking time, just before inspection, cos it all depends what shithead inspector you get on the day LOL....

We also have to have fire protection policies and the obviously smoke alarms, we also have to do fire drill have have written instructions on escape routes etc.... all of which I already had in place...

This is my main copy of all policies etc..

We have to do a 30 page self evaluation folder..... lol

Have all the pediactric first aid certificates... and have complaints proceedures in place and so the list goes on and on and on...... no smacking policy, pet policy, permission to travel in car policy, permission to administer medication policy, anti bullying policy, equal opportunity policy and on and on and on....and risk assessments of me house and written risk assessments of places I take the nippers.... and a visitors book for every person that enters me home whilst any nippers are here, plus a daily register all signed daily by every parent LOL

yep I have to have a drugs and booze policy..... its should read that we are allowed to get rat-arsed on the job LOL.... and should discuss all kids needs whilst in the pub...

Ive always been of the opinion that most of these policies should just come under the cover of being registered...... the ones we HAVE to have should all be part and parcel of getting registered, which would save hours upon hours of paperwork..... if ya registered then a list of all policies should come under that cover......

One of the new policies that we have to have is a 'Lost Child Policy'..... to dam funny if you ask me....... we had to write our own 'what to do if we lost a child policy' LMFAO....... so I did a proper one but I gave me inspector the below policy.... cos I actually do NO agree with such a policy..... all the paperwork in the world aint gonna stop a bad childminder from loosing one of her charges lol - so when me inspector asked to see my lost child policy this is what I handed over... and I sat back and let her read it and to see her reaction........ she already knew how I feel about all the paperwork and the actual worthlessness of most of it lol....

***Lost Child Policy

In the event that my child somehow or other gets separated from her/his childminder, I give permission for the below named childminder to... run around like a headless chicken, shouting and screaming like a fishwife..... if of course they feel fit to do...... or if they would rather, go and have a nice cuppa tea and think about what they have done and the consequences of their actions.

The phrase 'oh well ya can always have another one' will NOT be said in my company... because it can be very upsetting as I have already sold off a couple of the kids.

It will also be noted that I the parent will sue your arse for every penny you have, even if you deem to think that you in actual fact have done me a favour.

It will NEVER be mentioned that I am still claiming Family Allowance for the said lost child.... maybe it will turn up one day out of the blue, like the prodical son.

If the kid should appear at my door step in the future, all knowledge of it will be erased from all memory banks and all paperwork of the foresaid child will be destroyed..... especailly as the insurance money will of probably already been spent on the new extention to the house...***

Me inspector read and looked up and read some more and looked up and started to giggle and read again and said........ well, at least you have a great sense of humour, I do not know of any minder that would have the guts to actually hand that me to..... LOL..... good job she said.....

She also knows that I take the kids to many places that most others would deem 'not right' cos they are to scared to let kids have that little extra bit of experience, like we go paddling in the streams out down the lanes, most other minders wouldnt dare incase they got into trouble.... oh well, their kids are missing out....

Anyways to cut a long long story short....... I passed with flying colours.... all that worry and stress for nuffin.... I got my 20 page written report back yesterday...... and the comments me inspector wrote made me even blush....... and even though this is not a job that I particularly want, I know that I do it with a passion with the kids in my care loving all we do and how I interact with them.... I know Im different from most minders in how I talk to the kids and with what we do..... but, when have I ever followed the crowd..... Ive always stood alone.... it also says that I have one of the best equiped, both fun wise and educatinal that she has seen in a minders home in many a year, both inside and outside things......

A few years ago me then inspector called me a 'memory maker'.... and this now inspector said that I must give the children in my care wonderful lifetime memories.... if so, then my time here has been worth it..

So..... over the past few weeks cos me paperwork and files are so spot on, Ive been helping other minders to try and bring their practise up to standard, so they will pass, I told them I can help them with paperwork but how they manage and treat the kids in their care is down to them.... so that is a little of what Ive been up to this month....

I can hear you say, is that all, just all the above has kept you busy.... well yeah, plus the 50 hour working week Ive been doing and plus this little wee person....

He is called 'Pod' cos he is a cutie little peapod..... Ive had him now since crimbo, well from Jan 5th actually, and he is 6 months old...... and he is hard work LMFAO..... another little darling to help grow and nurture, cos he will be in my care for almost 9 hours a day.. so I will have such a big influence in his life, I hope I get it right..

Also besides all the inspection crap and the care of Pod and 14 other nippers throughout the week..... Ive been looking with our Jacob for a college that he wants to attend come September, he will be just 16 and does not want to go to Southdowns College which is an excellent college just 5 or so miles from us, where his 3 brothers attended, no, not our Jacob, he wants to go out to Sparsholt College in Winchester which is the best landbased college in the country......

http://www.sparsholt.ac.uk/

If you get a chance have a butchers at this place... ya see, my boy, wants to eventually either work for the forestry commission or own his own tree surgery business.... and Sparsholt is just about the best there is in that department...... so we went up to Winchester for an open day and to talk to the people there...... it will mean an hour and half extra travel in the morning and again in the evening for Jacob to go there..... it will be a big committment...... but watching him talk to the staff there and seeing the lights go on in his eyes and the passion in his voice when he listened to what they had to say and in answer to his questions..... I knew, that my boy had found something that fired his insides..... he will learn all about woodland skills and mechanics of all the machinery and the skills it takes to work in forest management..... its a 3 year course and I know it will fit me boy like a glove..... 80% of the course is spent on the estates and in the forests that surround the college..... and the saw mills etc.... everything to do with trees LOL....... and get this....... every single bit of equipment, even down to the boots and clothing will be supplied by the college...... all I will have to pay is the $1400 a year busfares...... but Im hoping that as Jacob turns 17 I will be able to afford to get him driving lessons and then at 17 1/2 maybe get him a car like I did for our Sam........ cos, it will take a hour and half on the bus to get to college and thats besides the 3-4 mile bike ride to get to the bus LOL..... but, ya see Winchester is sorta only 35 minutes away down the back lanes, so thats hell of a difference in travel time, but we will just have to see how the dosh pans out LOL... now it all depends on his main GCSE exams he will be taking after Feb half term, he needs to get good results on those for his place at college, so we have been doing extra work and Ive been helping him with his revision and course work.......

AND BESIDES ALL THE ABOVE lmfao............. guess what else Ive decided to do...... like a bloody moron........ Last Tuesday week I started me NV Queue LOL - Level 3 (C/C/L/D = Childrens Care, Learning and Development) course..... its usually a 2 year at college course but Im fast tracking it into 6-8 months LOL....... its bloody hard as buggery lmfao.... what the hell have I put myself in for...... apparently its hard enough at college let alone trying to do it at home LOL.... oh well at least Im getting a bursary for it and its costing me nuffin whereas most others have to pay the $1300 for the course..... so I might as well slog it out and get is done and dusted.... and to be honest the 150 or so pages of written work that I must complete which are so deep and indepth, well, its mostly what I practise now.... but on saying that.... its still bloody hard lmfao.... just hope I can complete it and get a good pass......cos I aint to good with word or writting stuff down..

So, I think it would be much easier if one of you doodles found me a job in the states lol..... oh and a house with a view and a porch thing that wraps around the house... and room for me chickens....and maybe room for a Llama, I could become someones 'English Nanny' lol I DONT come cheap though :)

Did I mention this little darling? :)

Ive also been house/flat hunting with our Tom and his girl Sammie.... they now after getting engaged back in November wanna have a go at living together before making the commitment of a mortgage etc..... so my lad will be moving out within the next few weeks on the beginning of his life without mummy LMFAO.... maybe I'll move whilst he is gone, cos one thing most dont know is that they often come back home lol.....

Im sure I mentioned Pod, but just incase here he is again... I will add he does NOT do much of this.... sleeping that is lmfao

So, all in all Ive had a busy month........ trying to fit all that around 50 hour working week and hospital appointments and sorting this mob out home here and cooking and cleaning and and and........ not much left at the end of the day for me......... Jebus, I could so do with a holiday or a little bit of loving...... any offers? lol

Way way way to much boring Twaddle for a cold Wednesday evening.......

x

Now I Know That Special Feeling - And The Uninvited Crimbo Dinner Quest..

2009-01-05T09:32:00.017Z

Ok.......WARNING those of a nervous disposition need not read the second part of this post....

So crimbo is over, we or should I say I took the tree and decs down yesterday..... remember the tree that we went and cut down a few posts earlier.... well, do you know, it was still as fresh as the day we cut it, only a handful of needles fell when we dragged it out the back door... so for 12 quid it was a great buy....

I was up first crimbo day, its different when ya kids are big, no early mornings in this house, and to be honest it was lovely lol..... I got up around 8am and had the house to meself to start sorting out the crimbo dinner...me lads didnt get up until around 11am lol..... but as I tiptoed down the stairs and turned on the tree lights, I could only smile.... the smile on my face was huge, I was right pathetic....

ya see, let me tell ya why...... there were pressies under the tree, just as every year.... pressies from me to me lads and from me lads to me and to each other..... that is how crimbo has always been in this house.... my lads only get pressies from me since the X left, they no longer get gifts from my X or his family, and my parents being dead they obviously dont get pressies from them, and my brothers and sister never bother.........

Ive never had a pressie under the tree from anyone else except me lads, not even when I was married.... even though there were loads for him..... he would sometimes get me a pressie that I use to HAVE to open at his parents house, cos we use to have to go there every crimbo with his whole family, WHICH I HATED MORE THEN LIFE ITSELF....

Anyways...... this crimbo when I tiptoed down the stairs and put the tree lights on I just stood there smiling, cos you see, this year for the first year as far back as I can remember there was 2 other pressies under the tree, 2 pressies that actually had been wrapped and had a label on with MY NAME upon it....

This is how the parcel from the Toadies in America arrived lol my postman Brian loved it....

The Toadies had sent me a crimbo parcel all the way from America..... and ToriZ and Kelly had sent me a crimbo pressie all the way from Wales lol... they arrived the week before christmas and how I stopped myself from opening them when they arrived I will never know.... I gently placed them under the tree and every single day up to crimbo I would pick them up and shake them and smile and smile.... how pathetic am I LOL.... it wouldnt of mattered if it was a bottle of bleach that had been wrapped, it wouldnt of mattered it if was a bloody old smelly pair of socks, or a tub of old age anti wrinkle cream lol, what mattered was that there was a pressie under me tree with a label on with MY NAME on... someone had taken the time to think of me at christmas.... so....... Now I Know That Special Feeling that others must feel at christmas time... now I know, and I liked that feeling, it was a first for me.... what a pathetic saddo of a person I truely am LOL - and of course the loverly flowers that Intense guy had sent.... so I thank you Toadies and ToriZ and Intense for giving me a 'first' and making me realise what Ive been missing all these years LOL

Anyways enough of all that......

Me lads and the compulsary crimbo photo lol

Crimbo dinner and the preparation to many seems like hard work, but to me its just like doing a Sunday Roast but on a bigger scale and extra trimmings.... we are very laid back here, we dont get stressed out, if dinner aint ready on time then it aint ready, and usually me 3 old lads bugger off to the pub for a quick pint just before dinner (as do almost all british blokes) but this year they didnt.... so dinner was in the oven and we had a few pressies to open..... I had bought Jacob a Wii and all the bits that go along with it for his main pressie, then bits and pieces of mainly BMX stuff.... and Sam had an Xbox 360 and all the bits for his main pressie and then others bits and pieces to open...... Ben and Tom for the first year ever had dosh off me for their main pressie so they could buy what they wanted in the sales, but seeing as they didnt need or want for anything they shoved it in their savings..... but I did also buy them half a dozen bits and bobs so they had somethings to open.... they also all still get crimbo stockings LMFAO.... and my Jacob, bless his little cotton socks had done me a crimbo stocking from father christmas full of lovely bits lol

Sam and Ben with a few of their bits..

Ben, Tom and Jacob... as you can see, Sam and Jacob had warm winter hats in their stockings which didnt come off their heads all christmas day LOL

Dinner was ready, the table set..

and it was Toms turn to carve the turkey.....

We were all stuffed and was just sitting around the table chatting..... Tom was taking some photos..... and then THAT IS WHEN we realised we had an UNINVITED dinner guest...... we didnt know at first.... not until Tom had taken a few photos and was checking to see if they had come out....... the guest didnt knock on the door, the guest didnt come dressed for the occasion... the guest was not invited....... but one thing the univited guest did to, and that was FREAK US ALL OUT lol.....

Ya see.... we aint normal in this house, not where photos are concerned.... so, as Tom was sitting at the table after finishing his food he decided to take a photo inside the Turkey LMFAO.... I have no idea why.... or what his thinking was behind it........ maybe the guest was subconsiously calling him, so that it could be included in the celebrations....... but whatever made Tom take the 'inside the Turkey' photo....... one thing is for sure..... that is where we found the uninvited dinner guest......

See if you can see the guest.... the guest that had been hiding in our Turkey all through dinner, the guest that only made itself know after we had eaten..... and you tell me you wouldnt be freaked out by what you see......

Click on the photo to enlarge and you can see the EYES looking out, we think we had more then one guest inside the turkey, we think there were a family of them.... can you see the EYES.... real eyes...... not just a bit of turkey innards, but REAL BLOODY EYES inside our turkey......

Tom took another photo at the same angle and there was nuffin there...... our uninvited dinner guests had gone back from whence they came...... FREAKY OR WHAT.......

So...... crimbo was nice, quiet but nice...... Tom's girlfriend came round for the evening and we roasted chestnuts and drank and for someone that rarely drinks I seemed to have been in a slightly drunken haze most of the holidays lol.... I was hoping that me soul was wrapped up under me tree, but alas, me soul is still lost....

I love this photo lol..... my Tom and Jacob both fell asleep late crimbo afternoon and we played an air-horn to wake them up lol it scared the poo out of them and this is the photo as they awake from their sleep lol

I think my Jacob and Tom look so much alike, they dont think so though.... but I do....especially as they have both grown their hair longish..look at the looks of surprise on their faces lol

This is Bens crimbo stuffed belly LMFAO

Young love....... Sigh......... I would settle for a bit of old love meself LMFAO

Bens thinking 'sod off mum' LOL

When I thought they couldnt possibly eat anything more...... they wanted crackers and cheeses LOL

So.........next crimbo when you are carving your Turkey, have a peek up its bum and have a proper look inside, cos you just dont know who might of invited themselves to dinner and are hiding inside ya turkey :)

I have a feeling this might be our last crimbo all together.... Im glad I savioured every last second of it..... it certainly will be a lovely memory to keep with me in my old age......

Im back at work today....... ARGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH so ya see, me knight in shining armour didnt come and whisk me away from all this lol.......

Hope you had a good one....... oh, thats my Sam as father christmas, like he thought we wouldnt know it was him lol

Now this long boring Twaddle makes up for the short previous post lol...

x

Chestnuts Roasting On Our Open Fire....

2009-01-01T22:26:00.004Z

Ok - we have done much of the above....... roasting chestnuts on our open fire in our antique chestnut pan.... and YES, that is me fire and me chestnuts...and NO I didnt burn me house down, only nearly LOL

And for someone that rarely RARELY drinks, I seem to of been drinking copious amounts of this....

oh, and before I forget...... HAPPY BLOODY NEW YEAR ........ now lets open another bottle of red :)

X

PS...... who says I cant do short posts (Buff) LOL