Crimpleness Has Its Advantages.....

Ok........ well, just under a fortnight ago me matie knew these 4 walls was driving me into a mental home, so she suggested that just me and her with NO nippers go to our favourite garden centre, just to get me out, and even though I can only hobble short distances, it would be nice and we could have a cuppa tea and a scone in the cafe bit......

I suggested that I actually take MY car.... cos I NEED to get back to driving and seeing as its an automatic, and as long as I could get in and out and sit comfortably then I didnt see a problem :)

Jebus, it was just so funny trying to get in me car lol..... but, get in I did and I drove round to Sharons to pick her up..... and off we went.....

Keydell Garden Centre is only in Horndean and about 8-10 minutes away with my driving..... the huge car park is built on a real steep slope except for the top part near the entrance, but there are not many parking spaces there........ so Sharon suggests cos it was like only me second trip out and I would be a bit wobbly on a slope, that I park in the space allocated to 'crimples'....... no no no I says, cos Im only a part time crimple and there might be a full time crimple that needs the space....... oh shut it she says, there are 3 other places for full time crimples so stop with the old 'giving a dam about others' crap and just park OVER THERE.... and she pointed to a car park space right next to the entrance.....

So I pulls up and we start to gather our bits when someone taps on me side window and nearly gave me a heart attack...... 'oh ere we go' says me matie..... so I put me window down and says......... yes???..... and this bloke says all smug like.... you aint allowed to park here.... so I says, who are you the car park police??.... this space is for blue badge holders only and you dont have one on your windscreen, says the bloke..... well, I says, I do have an I AM 50 BADGE back home, and a BESTEST MUM badge that I could go back home and get if that would make you smile *smiling at him*...... YOU CANT PARK HERE its for the disabled, he says in quite a rude manner....

Do YOU need this space I ask politely?...... no he says, but someone else might.... I says, its Thursday morning and the carpark only has a few cars parked...... look..... there are plenty of spaces, as you can see there are only a handful of cars actually here so what are the chances that all of a sudden there is going to be a mad gathering of crimples all deciding to gather NOW this minute at this garden centre.... there is NOT an average of 3 crimples to every non crimple..... me matie snorted and she started me giggling...... look Sharon says to the bloke, me matie here IS a crimple, whether she has a blue badge for the windscreen or not, she has crutches and cant walk very far and this is only her second trip out SO WE ARE PARKING HERE so I suggest you go hassle that little old lady over there that is breaking into that car... and she points to this dear little old lady that was innocently trying to open her carboot LOL.......

The bloke by now was a bit red faced.......... so, are you going to move or not, he says....... and at the same time me and Sharon say NOT and start to laff LOL...... well we will see about that he says, I will go and complain to the staff.... cos I dont believe you have the right to park here, you are not disabled and I think you are just to lazy to walk up the slope...... HOW I DIDNT DRAG THE BASTARD through the window and poke his eyes out is beyond me lol....ok listen me matie says...... picking up one of me crutches...... see this, this is a crutch.... a walking crutch that is and NOT a crotch.....*giggles*..... this is a walking aid for CRIMPLES..... see my matie here, this crutch belongs to her, well not technically her cos its the property of the hospital but its for her to use all the time she is a CRIMPLE.... so I suggest you bugger off before I hit you over the head with it......

How rude, the blokie says..... right me maties says to me..... GET OUT THE BLOODY CAR and show him that you are a dribbling spazmo crimple will ya for gawds sake, cos help me god I could be up for murder by 10 o'clock.......

So I drag meself out the car, over exagerating me movements and making strange noises.... and I do me little spazmo walk... SEE me matie says...... this here crimple, as you can see it REAL........ do you know what the blokie says LMFAO.... he says, you might just be using them as a prop LMFAO HAHAHAHAHAHAHA well that started me and Sharon laffing so hard that its all I could do to stand up on me dodgy legs lmfao....... Sharon walks up right close to the bloke, about 5 inches from his face and says..... I suggest you bugger off NOW cos I will not be held responsible if my crimple friend beats your head in with her crutch and then whilst you are screaming on the floor, I will also not be responsible for stomping on your head, and then YOU will need to be using this crimple carparking space next time you come here....... now SOD off, Im bored with you now LOL....... and with that this bloke used the 'F' word on us and scurried off and got in his car and drove like a bat out of hell out of the garden centre LOL..... leaving his basket of plants on the floor lmfao....... fanks matie for the 6 perennials.... they look beautiful in me garden lol.....



These are the plants that the bloke left in the carpark cos he was to busy having a temper tantrum.... Im mega chufted lol over $40 worth of plants..... fanks matie, it must of been 'Do A Good Deed For A Crimple Day' for you LMFAO....

Anyways, we had a little hobble around, and it was lovely to get out, I needed some bits and bobs to do me hanging baskets etc...... and now, seeing as how the nice man in the carpark had donated his other plants for me, I didnt need to buy perennials lmfao.... It was a bit slippy in places where the paths were wet where the staff had been watering the plants, and a couple of times I nearly went arse over tit, which made me matie scream with laughter..... nasty cow LOL....




This is crimple art..... we decided to use me crutches to do a bit of art work, well until the nice man in the green T-shirt that had STAFF written across the back, asked us politely to KEEP THE DAM STICKS off the plants lmao.... some people just dont have an appreciation for fine art :)



This is me matie on the other side of one of the greenhouses ringing me on her mobile to say that I needed to hobble me fat arse over there cos thats were the buzy lizzies were lmfao...... sometimes she just creases me up....



This little robin thats on the handle of our plant trolley followed us around all the time we was there.... I tried to get it to pose on me crutch but it was having non of it lol....

After about 30 minutes I was already knackered lol remember this was only me second trip out of me house, so we headed for the lovely little cafe which is situation in this beautiful little cottage that had been converted.... so me matie plonks me down on a table outside and goes in to get the teas and cakes....... she comes back out empty handed and says, get up, and come and get in the queue cos there is NO WAY IM gonna gueue lmfao..... so I hobble inside and Im about the 7th in the queue (AND I SO DONT QUEUE WELL) so I says to the people in front....... Im so very sorry to bother you.... *said in a sweet voice*.... is it possible for me to go first cos Im finding it very difficult to stand for long..... LMFAO....... and with that it was like moses and the parting of the waves.... they moved out the way with words of.... oh you go in front love, and... of course, let her through lmfao....... so I get to the front and I give me matie the nod and she comes and takes my place and I go outside and find a table lmfao.... with sounds of tut tut tut from the others in the queue lol - some times crimpleness has its advantages lol



This is our goody tray with the biggest clotted cream scone and carrot cake that I have ever seen LOL...Sharon had to go back in and get the mugs of tea... no wonder we are fat cows lmfao....



More crimple art, and NO, one crutch is not shorter then the other, I was trying to make the photo interesting lmfao...... on saying that, once when me father had a broken leg when we was kids, me and me brother shortened one of his crutches whilst he slept and when he work up he stood up and grabbed his crutches little beknown to him that we had made one tiny and he fell over on the floor cos he was off balance lmfao..... omg I couldnt sit down for a week with the leathering I got, but oh my it was so worth it LOL



This is me trolley of goodies :)







These will be pretty once they start to grow and fill out........

I love plants with a passion, maybe it was the many years I was involved with my X's family nursery business and then our own plant nursery before we split..... but I do know that plants give me so much joy.... and I like nuffin better then getting stuck in and getting me hands dirty.....

**************

Knee update - over the past few weeks Ive been at the hospital 3-4 times a week, they are trying desperately to sort me out......

What happens is, I see me consultant and they drain the gunge from me knee, then its straight round to the physio department where Nick and Anita do the business on me for over an hour lol..... they are me physios from when I had the ligaments reconstructed in me other knee, so they know me well and I will say even in my bad days we have laffed and laffed so much......

But last week I had physio last Mon Wed and then Thursday the decision was made to admit me, so I went into QA Hospital this time and had further surgery late Thursday evening.... they scrapped away all the bad tissue around the bone graft and bionic knee, and whilst under they stretched and manipulated the muscles to try and give me better movement.... and took internal photos so as to help with decision making in a few weeks......I persuaded them to let me out on Saturday, as me 2 older lads are away in Spain and I didnt want Jacob left to long in the house on his own, cos his other brother was away for the weekend..... AND I had his birthday treat to arrange LOL.... so, back to worse hobbling this week.... but they are trying and aint giving up on me yet......

So, yesterday I had 1 1/2 hours with Nick and Anita on this special spazmo bike that ya can change the sprockets on the peddles so that ya dodgy leg dont make a full whole rotation in a big arc, just a tiny one on me dodgy side.... its to keep the movement free....and on a few other weirdo machines... it was very painful and Nick had to swear at me a couple of times lol GOOD JOB he was me physio for 2 years and we get on well........ he repeated what he said to me 3 years ago when I ask to many question......... he said 'Mel, as I slide down this big wooden banister of life, you are like the bloody splinter in me arse - now just get on with it and stop with the questions' LOL.....



Thats Anita on the left with two ladies at receptions that always seem pleased to see me lol they said despite everything I always make them laff and they hear laughter coming from the gym when Im there....... Nick wouldnt let me take his photo YET lol.... he has just come back from a year traveling the states, starting in Alaska.... he said he got the urge from me a few years back when I would tell him my dreams of taking a year off and hiring a camper and just travelling all over America.... so thats what he actually did, they kept his job open for him and he only came back last month..... so we had a lot to catch up on..... I think they are secretly glad Im back with them, cos Jebus, some of those getting physio are so dam boring lol and the noise level most certainly goes up when I hobble in lol AND as strange as this is, there is ALWAYS every week someone else in there that I actually know lmfao...... I hobble in and usually have to say hello to someone lol it aint my fault I know a lot of people....

Anyways, thats whats happening so far with me knee, hospital again tomorrow and again this Friday.... Hoping to maybe have the drains out tomorrow *fingers crossed* cos since the Surgery on Thursday there aint been much gunge coming out....... maybe JUST BLOODY MAYBE this is a turning point...... Im holding me breathe so tightly....

I wasnt so scared this time going into surgery..... Ive gotten a bit numb to it all now if truth be told..... and didnt even tell anyone what was going on....

And now me head is clear of that cocktail of drugs, I can think things clearly.... Im still very humbled by most peoples comments and actions...... and disgusted by a few others, but ya know what..... those few others aint worth the drippings from me nose..... they will always look at themselves as victims and turn every situation around to themselves..... well I dont have selfish people in me life..... so thats that done and dusted ..........

Way way to much Twaddling rubbish for this overcast showery Tuesday....... Ive got things to do ya know..... now where is me book ;)

OXO