Saturday, 19 January 2008

Poisoned......

Ok....... Sorry I aint been around....but Im in hospital.....

Let me explain...... yesterday I was wellabit hungry so I thought I would whip up an cheese and onion ommelete..... I rummaged around in the veggie basket to find an onion, there was only 2 left under the spuds and one had started to sprout, but it was ok, I would just cut off the green shoots, ya know I DONT like wastage so I would use that one first LOL.....



This is the sprouting onion..

The ommelete did have a strange taste, but I put it down to the fact that I used a different type of cheese then usual..... It was thick and yummy.....



Heres me scrummie ommelete...

But last evening, I felt well strange..... I mean REALLY strange..... me doctor came out and I was sent to hospital, he thought I had some kind of poisoning...... where upon further investigation it was reveiled that the onion that I had used for me ommelete was not actually an onion, it was in fact A BLOODY OLD DAFFODIL bulb that must of been left over when I planted them earlier in the year..... what a bloody DINLO I truely am......



See how alike to an onion a daff bulb really is...... it was an honest mistake.....

Well....... Im ok...... cos I didnt leave it to long before I realised something was not right........

The Doctors have said...... I should be fine.......

and..

I SHOULD BE OUT IN THE SPRING................ boom boom.....

I should be out in the spring, do ya get it...... ITS A JOKE....... I heard it this morning on the radio..... well not quite the same story but still.......

ITS A BLOODY JOKE........ and I was real a miserable git this morning and it actually made me laugh out loud LOL......

Oh shut up, its well funny...... :)

Enough Boring Twaddle for a Saturday lunch time...... anyone wanna take me to lunch?

x

54 comments:

JBelle said...

omigod. I have never known anyone who has done this. Yes. I'll take you to lunch. Would you rather have me cook?

Get well soon. :(

katy said...

bloody hell, bet you got a spring in your step now!!!
take you out to lunch no prob, eat at yours only if i see the ingredients first!
feel better soon x

~:*:*:Pixie:*:*:~ said...

Could only happen to you... my gawd - I'm glad you're okay!!!!

laughingwolf said...

damn! lucky you got help... would never do to wait til it came out in the spring! :P lol

Jen said...

The funniest thing is that this story was totally believable coming from you. I wasn't the least bit skeptical because it fits right in with the mud bath and the bird seed and the turkey parts! I was wondering, though, why you took pictures of the onion and omelette in the first place. :)

MarmiteToasty said...

BANGING ME HEAD AGAINST THE BLEEDIN KERB.........

~(((JBelle))))~ Welcome Home Maties...... ITS A JOKE, I heard it this morning on the radio, except I put my own stamp on it LOL

I aint poorly or in hospital IT WAS A FUNNY JOKE about onions and daffs LOL...... :)

Oh and lets do lunch, I rarely get to go out for grub :).....glad you home safe....xxxxxxxx

~(((katy)))~ Tiz a bloody joke LOL.... ok thats 2 offers of lunch :)..xxxxx

~(((pixie)))~ :) DONT you doodles get british jokes???? aye aye? lmfao.... think about the words.... someone eats a daff bulb and the doc says, its ok, you will be out in the spring, thats when daffs flower.......xxxxxx

~(((laughingwolf)))~ :) shaking me head LOL.......xxxx

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((jen))))~ opps I missed ya :) - I heard the joke this morning on the radio, it didnt say about ommeletes though and it was just a 4 liner LOL....... but is soooooo made me laff LOL....... :) and your right, it could well of happened here LOL..xxxxx

Cindy said...

You crazy old woman! You really had me going there for a few minutes! Where do you want to go for lunch? Perhaps to Holland?

~:*:*:Pixie:*:*:~ said...

I got it, I got it!!! I thought the story was true and you had heard the "punchline" on the radio - coincidental? yes. Possible? yes!

Okay - now I know you're not poisoned, I'm going to spank you for the scare!!!!

*spanked!*

Go Figure said...

Loon.

Rebecca said...

That's too funny! :)

ciara said...

(((((mel and anyone's for a good daffodil bulbing))))crikey!i really thought you had gone and done it this time. this sounds so 'mel' lol

Ol' Lady said...

I'll take ya to lunch but I ain't commenting on the comments :o

toadman said...

You had me going there for a minute you crazy woman you! I've told the bird seed casserole story a lot lately also...your stories are gems!

Come visit, Angela will cook.. and we won't eat the bulbs, ok?

PinkAcorn said...

Too funny! Ya had me going there...

Pamela said...

well... you bloomin' little prankster.

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((cindy)))))~ :) ok Holland would be great, my Sam was in Amsterdam just before crimbo as part of his crimbo pressie, and I went there years ago, we could visit the DAFF and Tulip fieldns LOL.....xxxxx

~((((((pixie))))))~ spanking can be nice in the right circumstances lol.... except Im a gentle soul and prefer the touch of soft hands lol.......xxxx

~(((((Starr))))~ lol now that aint nice lol you knows I aint no loon, I cant fly and them loons are great fliers lol....oh, you mean that kinda loon ;)....xxxxxx

~((((rebecca)))))~ welcom - Well I heard the content of the joke on the radio this morning and it sooooo made me laff, so I just put me own words to it lol...... dam funny ....xxxx

~(((ciara anyones of a nibble of their bulb sack)))))~ well, shall I let you into a secret, and DONT tell anyone, last year when I grabbed a hand full of onions from the veggie basket, there was a daff and a crocus bulb with them lol..... obviously I could see the crocus bulb was not an onion, but I DID cut up the daff bulb and look and stare at it untill I realised that it was no proper onion lol......xxxxxxx

~(((ol lady)))~ ya know one of these days Im just gonna turn up on ya door step :).... Im like that, spontanious lol....xxxxxx

~((((Toadie)))))~ well Im still laffing and gagging over Ben eating the birdseed stuffing lmfao.... Ive been trying to pluck up the courage to tell him, but I think its more special to keep it to meself lol oh and you lot that is....

I'll come visit and I'll do the cooking :) how about that? :).....xxxxxxx

~((((pinkacorn))))~ welcome again :) - well sometimes ya just avta smile :)....xxx

~(((pamela))))~ lmfao@bloomin hehehehe....xxx

Casdok said...

Yep you had me as well!! :)

Akelamalu said...

I was like OMG when you said you were in hospital, then I read the rest and realised cos I've heard it before. You didn't have give me a scare though you bugger. :)

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Shit! You had me worried for about half a second there.

Scots said...

that has just made me laugh ... a lot :o) xxx

Yer bloody mad missus!!

Slip said...

That's a Dilly of a story, not even sure a daffy bulb would hurt you the damn squirrels will dig them up around here if you don't watch them!

buffalodickdy said...

I'm really glad you're OK! It did remind me of the time my brother-in-law accidentally took the dogs' deworming pill. We called emergency, and said he should be fine... But the sight of him dragging his ass across the carpet until the worms were gone...

Within Without said...

You TOTALLY sucked me in! It seemed so impossible as to be, well, possible.

What a jokester! For that, I think you should take all of US out for lunch! Did you write for Monty Python or Fawlty Towers, perchance?

Seeker said...

ok mmtsty! First I was going ask about being poisened by a flower to be, and then, after reading all the comments, I realized there actually was a poisening!!!

And you fed it to us!

Everyone! Warning! Please don't eat the Marmitetoasty Daffodil bulb omlets!

:-) seeker

Seeker said...

whoops! the affect (effect) of the omelete --- poison (not poisen). Ugghhh. and me an English Lit major - Hamlet with a Bronx accent! seeker

laughingwolf said...

ok... just don't look back! :P lol

Tori_Z said...

I'm glad you're OK. Good job you went to the doctor right away.

Yeah, I got the joke. Good one! :) LOL!

Mistress of the Moonlight said...

Okay. Did you eat the daffodil or is this a joke? I don't know whether to wish you godspeed in getting well or kick you in the butt for worrying us all while making up a good joke! M

Sienna said...

This is very funny, you had me hook, line and sinker!!!!

ROTFLMAO funny!

It's quite feasible that someone would do this, I would do this...

I am still laughing, but I'm also glad you really didn't eat a daffodil bulb, and aren't really ill..

You are a very funny Marmitetoasty. :) :)

Pleased to meet you.

Pam

Book and Hook said...

You had me going too. Glad I read the comments before I commented and said I hoped you were feeling better!
Well I do hope your knee starts feeling better, but that is not the point.
Great way to get me to delurk!
Hahahaha!

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((casdok))))~ I didnt mean to tease, but I thought the joke was wellabit funny when I held it, it was nice to put me own twist to it though LOL.....xxxxx

~(((ake))))~ :) I just like to keep ya on ya toes lol..... xxxxx

~(((Saintly))))~ LMFAO@shit laffing so loud here :) - no need to ever worry about me, Im as tough as old boots .....xxxxxx

~(((Scottie))))~ :) glad it put a smile on ya face, especially after your buggered up time with that matie of yours....xxxxx

~(((slip)))~ dam squirrels do that here to, but Im pretty sure they are poison to us mere humans lol... shall I try it to check? :)....xxxxx

~(((buffalodickdy)))~ LOL@dragging his bum lmfao..... :) my Tom once as a nipper ate a packet of me birth control lol.....xxxx

~(((within without))))~ welcome to the mad house - ok lunch is on me :) - well it was almost like something that could happen to me in real life, as I told ciaraslag up above, I did chop a daff bulb up once with me onions but realised I was being a dinlo lol....

LOL@Monty Python and Fawlty Towers..... I can only write from life experiences, scroll back and read some of me older posts..... doomed I tell ya, trouble and nonsense follows me everywhere :).....xxxx

~((((Seeker))))~ welcome to you to :) where ya all coming from? lol

Oye Im a great cook, dont you go bashing me ommeletes lol :) - I must tell about the tin of dog food I ate once lmfao..... fanks for popping buy :) always lovely to see new faces.... and you a lit major, is that like in the army LOL .....xxxx

~(((laughingwolf)))~ now ya scaring me lol looking over me shoulder :)......xxxxx

~(((toriZ)))~ :) hope it made ya smile....xxxx

~((((mistress))))~ IT WAS A JOKE..... boom boom lol....xxxx

~((sienna))))~ pleased to meet you to :) - I dont mean to be funny, I usually just write about me life experiences except they never seem to ever be normal lol...... fanks for popping by....xxxxx

~((((book and hook))))~ I love it when I can get a bluurker to come out from behind the bushes lol..... now you aint allowed to blurk no more :) fanks for deblurking lol....xxxx

MarmiteToasty said...

ps (((seeker))) is 'Hamlet' your code word for Ham Ommelete lol....xx

myrtle beached whale said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
myrtle beached whale said...

oh damn, you got me. I believed you. Reel me in, I am hooked.

Kati said...

*snort* Ooooh Toasty. Yep, that was a good pun all right, but GIRL!!! Dang. Not that the two bulbs don't resemble each other or anything, but you seem to spend SOOOO much time at the hospital, between yourself & your boys.

Hope you feel better quickly!!!!!

Inland Empire Girl said...

You can always come to lunch at my house and your adopted mom would always have you to her house. I guess you will need one of those little labeling machines to mark your stuff. lol.

homo escapeons said...

Doing 'Daff' is prolly not much different than eating 'magic' mushrooms...
which btw make fantastic omelettes and precipitate hours of scintillating mid morning conversations with your guests...especially the Inlaws.

Tori_Z said...

Yeah, it gave me a real chuckle. Glad you really weren't daft enough to do something like this though.

(told my Mam about it, and she thinks it really happened. LOL!)

Mrs. Mac said...

Rats ... you fooled me ... glad you won't be pushing up daffodils ;)

Cindy said...

Just stopping by to see what you're up to now- goodness knows it has to be something!

JeanC said...

You had me going there, I couldn't see how anyone could mistake a daffodil bulb for an onion. I know British cooks aren't the greatest in the world, but you should know what an onion is supposed to look like :D

Silly MarmiteToasty hehehehehe

Anonymous said...

Such a nice treat to read that you are alright and it was all for fun. I would definitely enjoy taking you to lunch, it would be a fine visit indeed. Keep up the good work, your reputation grows.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, anonymous didn't sign. The Stickman

Silver Valley Girl said...

What a great joke!! But it seemed so real, especially in your house!! Thanks for the great laugh...as always!! And you are welcome at my house for lunch any time!!!

Bay Views said...

Remember, Darlin', another pronunciation of that bulb, is Daffydil, which I think fits this story. As the Aussies say, Good on you.

Idaho Escapee said...

I wrote this on Huck-a-berries, but I thot it would fit here as well. And, unlike your
daffydil situation (which sprung from your 'tulips'), this actually happened.

As a child, on a hot summer's day, I reached inside the fridge (icebox or whatever you Brits call it) for the Pink Lemonade...I poured myself a glass, and took a gulp and immediately began to wretch.

Turns out my little sister had poured PINK DISH SOAP into the pitcher. And no, I wasn't 'forever blowing bubbles'. This actually happened. Forty years on and I still can't believe it meself.

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((myrtle beached whale)))~ :) well I did come clean at the end of me post :)...xxx

~(((kati)))~ I aint poorly lol... and there was a time that one of me lads was in ICU on level 4 of the hospital and one was on level 2 in the eye department after someone stabbed him in the eye with a pencil at school lol I was up and down in the lift all day lol....xxxxx

~(((InlandEmpireGirl)))~ I LOVE them little machines lol.... and I would LOVE to have dinner with you and your mum :)....xxxxx

~(((homo)))~ welcome - me maties that live up the farm, every spring early in the mornings one of his fields has about 8 people in it, heads bowed to the ground, cos he has this one field that grows THEM THERE MAGICs.... and he cant really do much about it.....xxxx

~(((toriZ)))~ Just play along and tell ya mum I died LMFAO....xxxx

~(((mrs mac)))~ better to be pushing of the daffs then pushing up the daisies lol.... :) xxxxx

~(((jeanc)))~ welcom - wash you mouth out with fairy liquid for saying Brits aint good cooks, what about Gordon Ramsey or Jamie Oliver or or or.... dam cheek :)..... xxxx

~(((((((((Stickman)))))))))~ Im stickmans cor blimey penpal lol..... The only reputation I have is a 'well ard' one, cos I aint no softie ;)....xxxxxx

~((((SilverValleyGirl))))~ ya know I would LOVE to be a part of your beautiful family.... and yep, it is something that could of happened in this mad house :)....xxxxxx

~((((bay views))))~ are ya saying Im a daft and a dil? LOL :).... xxxxx

~(((idaho escapee))))~ welcome back :) - lol@your story, your sister and I would make great maties LOL....xxxxx

His Girl Friday said...

OMG, well, that's a first

glad yer ok!! :)

OrdinaryShark said...

Silly Marmite- You are susposed to SAUTE daffodil. Mixing them up in an ommelete, silly you. ;-)

Tori_Z said...

LOL!

I told her you weren't too bad and had pulled through, but it was a close one, and if you hadn't gotten to the hospital as quick as you did you wouldn't have made it. LOL!

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((his girl friday)))~ hehehe Ive actually come close to doing it... but dont tell no one :)....xxxx

~(((((((((((((((((Sharkie)))))))))))))~ next time I visit ya I will make ya a nice ommelete for ya breakfast :) with marmite soldiers and a cuppa tea in bed.... just DONT eat the ommelete LOL ..... hugs oxoxoxox

~(((toriZ))))~ IT WAS JUST A JOKE YA DINLO lmfao.....xxx

AuntieM said...

Okay, you really had me going right up till the end! Thanks for the great laugh, and hope everything in your life is coming up roses!

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((auntiem)))~ :) I think I had everyone going for a minute lol..xxxx