Saturday 25 October 2008

Speculate to Accumulate - Flogging Sand To The Arabs..

Ok.......... I aint much good at most things in life, I dont have any talents.... though, I do remember all the words to that famous British tune 'Land Of Hope And Glory' when Ive had a bottle of red wine, I dont know the words when sober LOL... may I just add here, that it has been many many years since I got rat-arsed, let alone tipsy even.....

So Im not much good at anything, I can still hear the words 'YOU GOOD FOR F'IN NUFFIN' shouted at me by my father as he boxed me ears for some misdemeaner I might have done as a child....and 'YOU'LL NEVER AMOUNT TO MUCH' LOL...

Ive failed at most things in life..... being a daughter, a wife, even a friend sometimes and often Ive failed at being a mother...

But one thing I KNOW Im good at, something I have a canny knack for and that is surviving.... and making money...... not pots of money, but enough....most things in life I look at way different from me maties.... I always wear, just under the skin, me 'business head' me 'there's gold in them there hills head'......it drives me maties mad.... but they are not, and never have been put in positions of survival, they have always had a hand to hold and family around them and a net under them to catch them if and when they fall.......... me, Ive never had that..... not even when I was married to the tosser LOL.... its hard always being everyone elses net, especially when one aint to keen on fishing lol.....

Anyways..... me, I could sell sand to the Arabs.... me maties always roll their eyes when I mention some of the ways I make that little extra bit of dosh.... but then, they wouldnt understand what drives me, no one does really..... I stand alone, not many really know ME, and they most certainly do not know about my life in years gone by or how I tick.... somethings are not for sharing until that someone special stumbles into my life....

So...... Selling sand to the arabs.....ya see, I use to own a pre-school, I sold it about 3 years ago, and I do actually now regret that decision, but tough tittie on me on that one...... but ya see, I still get the pre-school catalogues with equipment and stuff one needs to run a successful pre-school......

Three weeks or so ago a SALES CATALOGUE dropped through me door from one of the many school catalogues that I get throughout the year.... only this sales catalogue was a tad different, this one promised up to 75% off.... and I know all the stuff in the catalogues are top quality cos they are made for schools etc and are very tough and hardwearing.......



This is the now well thumbed catalogue..

In my job, unlike in doodleland land, we have very very high standards and rules and Inspections and policies we HAVE to abide by, and one of those inspection rules is that we HAVE to have multicultral toys and equipment, depicting black people and chinese people and as many different cultures as we can incorporate into the teaching equipment of the kids in our care...we have to have black dolls and puzzles and also items showing different occupations etc .. also toys etc showing people of varying disabilities..... and so the list goes on.. oh did I forget to mention we HAVE to have books and puzzles and items to do with different religons so that the kids in my care know about all walks of life and countries and the people that live in them.... see, I told ya our rules are not like in doodleland lol.... if we dont have these things readily at hand then we dont pass our inspection....

On my last inspection when they asked about what multicultral things I had for the children I replied that I have a black friend called black Michelle that the children often see and I sometimes buy a chinky take-away on a Saturday night and I also had a draggy leg which the kids often commented upon ....... it did NOT go down to well, if fact they told me off bigtime lol, but at least I was being honest lol and certainly being myself ... I was told I needed to get some items that showed these things.... like culture and crimpleness....

So the arrival of this sales catalogue got my 'business head' turning over :)....... I had an idea and what a great idea it was lmfao....... ya see, not many people have access to these catalogues and certainly not the bog standard childminders LOL..... this was my chance....

I flicked though the catalogue with my childminder head on thinking of all the new rules that came into affect at the beginning of September, and what I KNOW many childminders would be lacking......



And this is what was making my brain go kerrr-ching lol

There was stuff that I needed for home here, and I have loads of equipment, so if even I needed it then I know for sure that other childminders would need it, and they dont have the easy route to get it like me, but now they would LOL........

So, this is what I did........ I ordered over 300 quids ($600) of items from the catalogue...remembering I was getting this 75% off so 300 quids worth was actually more like over 1000 quids ($2000) worth of stuff..... knowing I was onto a winner........ yep 300 quids worth of sales stuff lol.... I actually couldnt lose... no way no how.... it was impossible to actually lose LOL....

This is how it works..... I ordered 300 quids worth of items, from puzzles to multicultral dressing up clothes (chinky boy, african child, japenese girl), many many boxes of different play foods, chinky, japenese, italian, french playsets, little black play figures and little figures with disabilities, there was a blind figure, leg brace figure, woman with crutches and top it off an asian figure in a wheelchair which was great for two of the set categories - multicultral AND a crimple.... :) oh and some special cusions for home here.... I ordered what I needed for my own use plus tons to flog on Ebay.... I did let me matie Sharon have a butchers and order what she needed for herself as long as she only order her needs and no more.... this was MY idea and she agreed cos she was mega chufted to be able to stock up on all she needed with 75% discount...



Japenese play food set...



Froggie.. opps.... French play food set...

I knew by buying it with up to 75% off, I would at least make double if not triple what I paid.....

Three days after ordering a HUGE UPS van arrived out the front, I didnt even know we have them over here lol, and delivered the first two of 4 boxes of goodies......



This is Sprite sitting on the first of the boxes lol....

I so couldnt go wrong, ya see, ya have 30 days from receiving ya invoice before ya even have to pay, that means I would have 30 days to sell as much as I could on ebay before my bill would have to be settled....



This is the contents from the first box lol.... my sofa is 3 foot deep so you can see how many little boxes there are :)

I had ordered at least 4 of each thing I thought would sell.... and one by one I started to load them onto me ebay account.... over the past 3 weeks Ive sold 33 items and received 315 quid ($630) in money, which has now paid for all goods I had orginally ordered, so the other 43 or so items I have left is now pure profit...... some of the items sold for 4 times what I paid lol and some for at least double.... ya just type CHILDMINDER in the title and they swarm around like flies on poo :).... but get this..... the first week a couple of the items like the puzzles didnt sell as well as I wanted, dont get me wrong I STILL made money from them...... but not as much as I forsaw...... the best selling was the chinese play food sets etc....and the little crimple figures went for ridiculas amounts of money.... I paid 4 quid for the set of 4, I advertised them seperately and quadrupled me money on those alone lol good job I had/have 4 sets to flog :)........



This is one of the little figures.... that we HAVE to have within our childminding setting...

When I advertise things like this Im not so crazy with the description lol I CAN be professional as and when I so choose lol

But get this lmfao....... after a couple of weeks, I rang the catalogue up and asked if I could return some items that I realised I didnt really need......... sure they said, just box up what ya dont need/want and a bloke will come tomorrow and pick it up and we will reinvoice ya :) BINGO...... so Ive already paid off the whole invoice and still will make at least 400-600 quid ($800-1600) on the things I have still to sell.... I have 37 items still active on there this week alone and still more to put on during the coming week:)........ see I can sell sand to the arabs lol - whilst on the phone I also mentioned that the little chinese and japenese playfood sets where slightly different then in the photo in the catalogue and that even though I liked what I received I thought there would be slightly more bits..... to which she said..... let me check in the catalogue, I could hear her flicking through it and she then said, your right it is slightly different and thats not good ( I WAS MORE THEN HAPPY THOUGH) so she said, I will send you 2 more chinese sets and 2 more japenses sets to make up for the inconvenience LMFAO....... oh cripes so I have 4 more sets coming which will sell at least for 80 quid ($160)...... bring it on lmfao..... shaking me head....



These nuts and bolts look innocent enough but they are so very very educational to the younger kids... 4 different colours, 4 different shapes, 4 different sizes and only the right shape fits the right size which fits the right colour... and eye hand co-ordination to boot :)

Also, the woman opposite me whose 2 kids I just walk to school for her and for that she pays me 40 quid a week ($80) gave me a big bag of clothes and asked if they would be of any use to Sprite, as she is younger then her girl...... I tried all I could on Sprite and gave her mum all those items that fitted her, the rest of the stuff I shoved on ebay lmfao it was/is all proper makes like gap and marks and spencers and next.... they cost me nuffin, and already it looks like I will make loads on them lmfao....



Mama mia... Italian playset lmfao

I love selling on ebay and Im quite an old hand at it now with over 520 buy and sell transactions with 100% top feedback.... ya see, Im very fair with the postage and always only sell top stuff.... I could so easily make a living from ebay alone lol..... me and Colin, who is one of the nippers dads that I childmind for, have often talked at pooling our resources and just making a living from ebay lol.... we both get a buzz from it and he like me can sell ice to the eskimos.....



These threading beads shaped like fruit are just lovely, and wooden, I dont have no crap educational equipment in my house so I wouldnt sell anything crap either....

A few years back I sold a handful of little play figures that were just spare in the toybox.... they went for about 4 or 5 quid I think, and when I send the invoice to the person that bought them, I got quite a shock....... quite a shock indeed, you see, when I sell things from home, be it little toys or items surplus to need from me cupboard I ALWAYS put a witty description, I cant help it, its just me....

So when I was selling these little fairytale castle figures; king queen princess knight dragon wizard, I wrote a little story about the characters lol about how the princess wanted to marry the stableboy but the queen wouldnt allow it so she was running off to get married else where etc etc.... just stupid stuff.... well it must of caught the eye of someone very special cos the buyer not only bought the figures bur emailed me asking if I would write scripts for an animation company that he was executive animator producer on..... it was only the same company that did 'Flushed Away' and 'Wallace and Grommit'...his name is on the DVDs as one of the animators so I know it was really him..... and he sent me some wonderful photos of all the behind the screen going ons (which are all on me old computer and which I will have to get off and show ya) and loads of information, and he asked me to write little stories about different characters that he could incorporate into short animation stories........ IT COULD OF BEEN ME BIG CHANCE lol...... but I never thought I could do it..... ya see.....my father always said I was a 'GOOD FOR F'IN NUFFIN and I'D NEVER AMOUNT TO MUCH'..... so maybe he was right after all :)

When I sold some Denby plates a few months back that I no longer used but were part of a wedding gift back in 1981 lol and a very expensive gift I will add.... I knew there would be others out there with the same set with parts missing.... each plate went for about 15 quid ($30) each..... but I must of got at least 20 or more emails from people just laffing at me description lol...... I put something like 'Denby Gypsy Plater for Sale.... 1981 Wedding gift... no longer needed, seeing as how I have got rid of the husband I thought I would get rid of these plates to... but unlike my X these plates have faired much better, no cracks or chips where as he is old and decrepid and wrinkled with chips and is very much broken'....... LMFAO..... the emails I got from people just laffing at the descriptions were well funny.....

Anyways.... ya see, Im a surviver, and I always seem to be able to make money, its a knack I have..... I wish sometimes I didnt have it..... cos if things aint screwed down I will probably always think about flogging it on ebay lol......

I will shove the money I make in me travel savings account for maybe travelling to the states next year..... and Im weird cos once I put money in certain accounts I DONT take it out for any other reason then for what its in their for....

Waffling on way to much now lmfao.....boring stuff that I know no one but me is interested in lol..... but I aint bovvered.....if you have read down this far you are either mentally challenged or just plain crazy lmfao

x

60 comments:

Slip said...

Don't you feel bad screwing those poor E-Bay adicted fools? I am at my hill farm,bow hunting the elusive whitetail deer! I am typing this on my new Blackberry,complete with www and all!

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((slip)))~ the thing is, I aint actually screwing anyone, they are still getting items for less then they could get them even IF they had access to the schools catalogues lol and Im always fair with postage.... hence me great feedback lol....

Are you wearing green tights whilst hunting with your bow and arrow lol you know, like robin hood :) - do you know my maiden name was Sherwood so I have quite a liking to Merry Men in green tights lmfao..... oh a blackberry, that reminds to make a blackberry and apple pie tomorrow lmfao....xxxxxxxx

Annie Wan said...

toasty sherwood! you're good for a laff even when you're pissed. i wonder what an english play food set would look like ...

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((mei del)))~ jebus its been years since Ive been pissed out me head lmfao.... maybe I'll open a bottle of red next week seeing as how its half term lmfao....

The english food sets are a tad boring lmfao..... so I didnt order any of those lol.... :)... xxxxx

Deanna said...

am sitting here waiting for hubby to come in from bow hunting the elusive white tail deer in our woods. Don't know why he bothers *shakes head* - he hasn't gotten one in years! But I don't mind, it gives me time alone not being pestered.
Great idea about the ebay and awesome that it worked out so well! I can readily believe you could easily sell sand to an Arab. You've sold me! lol

Lisa said...

Thank God you posted something new! Every time I've logged on lately and seen that onion tart, I get hungry, leave the computer and go find something cheesy to eat! Damn you!!

Anyway, I think you and my sister would get along great! She's always working a scheme too. She a flight attendant who also makes fabulous jewelry. She always wears her own creations to work, and carries things she's working on, and sells something every times she works!! Hundreds of dollars each!

And although I can tell you are correct about your standards for childminders, I think us Doodles have been dissed!! Okay, not really, but this is a call for Doodles to rise up and... well, admit our failings and then go buy multicultural toys... from Marmy!

Pamela said...

I've heard of people like you...Rumpelstiltskin or something, right. ha ha ha

JBelle said...

...or just checking to make sure you don't have anything else to sell because I already have a lovely chinky take out set as well a a froggy set. I only got my crimple family, I have a whole family of crimples, this summer. If I'd only known you were going to start showing crimples. I spose YOURS are autographed. sigh.

ChicagoLady said...

I must be plain crazy, because I read all the way through. I think it's great how well you've done selling things on ebay. Your father was wrong when he said you'd never amount to much. You see opportunities to make extra money and you jump on them. You take good care of the nippers you watch, and you have the ability to entertain people from across the globe with your witty and humorous stories about life.

Not bad for a "good for f'in nuffin."

Pam said...

((((mel and anyone's for a get rich quick scheme or two hehehe lol)))) can you please pass some of those money making skills on to me, please? i just started an online shop & sold nary a thing LOL http://ciarastreasuresandcreations.blogspot.com

i did put a couple things on etsy, but i think i'm going to pull them off soon & try ebay.

love the japanese food play set.

LadyStyx said...

Sand to Arabs, Ice cubes to Eskimos, Marmy can sell it all! Congrats on the most excellent sales!

That sperm donor that calls himself your father... *shakes head*... is not right in the head at all. My bestie in South Carolina...her fols were just as bad. Poor gal ~finally~ decided it was time to go to therapy to deal with her issues because of them.

Carol Woolum Roberts said...

I think I need to take a course in the Marmite Toasty School of Business. Hey, there's an idea for another money maker. Have an online course teaching people to make money!! LOL!!!!

sparrow said...

Okay. Now I'm pissed (angry, not drunk).

I didn't see one single fraggin' marmite jar in either of those dinner settings.

Are you HIGH????

What are you teaching these children????

Poor sweet Sprite.

martin said...

Great idea, you will be the only one making money except the bankers of course!. Good luck..x

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((punkn)))~ blimey, are you slips wifey? cos he is off bow hunting them little sweet cute bambis..... well, I could also sell kangaroo to the aussies lol....xxxxx

~((((lisa)))))~ IVE BEEN BUSY gawds sake lol.... dear Iggy (Intense Guy) sent me over 2 Amish ragdolls, I will get top marks for those on me inspection lmfao.... me matie childminders are always (in a fun way) trying to out do each other in the ethnic/multicultral/religious/crimple themes lol.....xxxxxx

~(((Pamela)))~ lmfao@Rumpelstiltskin....to funny....xxxxxx

~(((((JBelle)))))~ Im NOT racist but if you have a black crimple you get top marks with Ofsted LOL.... you so dont have those playsets.... fibber...xxxxxxxxxxx

~(((chicagolady)))~ Well I never took much notice of me father anyways lol..... its a standing joke with me friends, if it aint tied down Mel will flog it lol..

Ive even got things that I KNOW I can shift off of Freecycle.... and last month I sold and made over $300 from selling things on :)....

I do know somewhere in me head there is still a brain.... I use to work for the Ministry of Denfence back in the day so I aint all thick in the head lol..... and I had me own designer knitwear business, and then started from scratch and owned me/our own plant nursery, and of course I had me preschool..... I can usually turn shit situations into viable little businesses........ oh, I also when me lads where younger use to paint farmyard animals onto terricotta pots and sell them at all the craft shops and fayres lol....... and use to type up Naval Officers Manuscripts in the evenings ....

That is why I KNOW if I moved to the states and opened a little Quaint/Funny B&B I could make a go of it :).... ok, sorry, waffling again lmfao.....xxxxxxxx

~((((((ciara anyones for a set of wooden threading beads *wink* lol)))))~ tiz ok ciara, without those words or if I had been mollycoddled I would of been a whimpy sissy woman that couldnt stand on me own two feet, or one as the case is at the moment lmfao....wow on your shop.... I just had a quick look but will look proper later today.... how do you set something like that up? I NEED TO DO THAT with me designer knitting stuff lmfao....

Aint that little japenese set just the loveliest.... my minded nippers LOVE it....xxxxxxxx

~(((ladystyx)))))~ I DONT NEED THERAPY over my father lmfao...... he is dead and buried, oh, ok, not buried but flushed out to see somewhere in Scotland.... things were what they were, there is no hate there for the man.... it was what it was at the time..... he had his reasons Im sure....

Just dont stand still long enough or I will sell ya lmfao....xxxxxx

~(((((SilverValleyGirl)))~ I think Im good at little money making ideas cos Ive had to of been lol.... where me maties brain thinks on a completely different wavelength cos they have never had to survive or make extra in the past to live..... me and Colin ARE seriously thinking about buying and selling, we both KNOW what sells and where to get things and its a right proper buzz, except I childmind his 2 boys and they would have to go elsewhere lmfao.....xxxxxxx

~((((((((pixie)))))))))~ I know, aint it sad NO little jars of marmite....

HIGH???? ..... nope lol

Im teaching them love and respect for others and how to laff and how to grow and how to have wonderful memories....

Ive had Sprite since she was 10 weeks old and she is part of my family, 9 hours a day every day, this is her (as well as the other kids) second home.... so no 'poor sweet Sprite' lucky, beautiful Sprite to be with me :).....xxxxxxxx

~((((martin))))~ welcome to the crazy house of Twaddle lol..... well just stuff ya money in ya hiking boots in the cupboard like I do then the bankers cant make money off ya ;)......xxxx

buffalodick said...

You'da made a heck of a Yankee horse trader from the sound of it!

Akelamalu said...

Hey well done you Marmie! You're not screwing anyone you are providing a service! :)

Intense Guy said...

I went to eBay all excited and was going to bid on some Sand but then I saw the Ice and durn if I couldn't make up my mind what to bid on - but then I saw something that left me breathless... That big brown cardboard box that Sprite was sitting on is listed too!!! ...and I bet if ya would autograph it, I'd be outbid in a jiffy.

Hugs Toasty tight... Your father did you a world of hurt saying what he did to you - and he was WRONG!

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((((Buffalo))))~ I think they also call it 'the gift of the gab' :).... I use to actually LOVE with a passion when me and me X use to attend the HUGE Garden and Country Shows with our plants... loved the interaction with the customers and the witty comments back and forth, I could always get people to buy way way more then they orginally came to buy LMFAO....xxxxxxx

~(((ake))))~ :) Nope Im fair and square and everyone wins.... suckers lmfao....xxxxxxx

~(((((((intense guy)))))~ dam the sand and ice have all gone lmfao I can do you a nice range in Camels if thats of any use LOL...... do you know, it dont look to big in the photo, but the 2 main boxes where HUGE and the delivery bloke had to carry them in cos they only just fitted through the door..... the nippers had so much fun with the empty boxes for a few days and then I even pursuaded two of the parents to go home with the boxes so their kids could have fun at home with them lol the next day one of the parents said to me..... how the bloody hell did you get me to take that dam box home, I said... I have ways of gentle ways so you didnt even think you was being bambozzled so I didnt have to take the boxes to the dump lmfao.....

((((Iggy))) hugs back.... no not a world of hurt - he made me the tough arsed bastard I am today LOL....xxxxx

Charles Gramlich said...

We all fail sometimes at the parenting thing, but we keep at it and keep trying to do better. That's the best we can hope for. I'm sure your children appreciate that.

Toriz said...

Not only did I read all the way down, but I found it interesting too. :)

I could do with getting my paws on that catalogue. I bet that's where I'd find some of the tacktile puzzles and such I've been trying to find for myself...

*Sneaks in and swipes the catalogue when you're not looking*

I used to spend a lot of time on ebay. At the moment I'm spending the time in hospital instead though. LOL! ;)

Idaho Dad said...

Great article. Kind of inspiring for me, as well, because I've been wanting to get back to eBay selling but haven't had the time. I started on eBay ten years ago this fall and had loads of fun (and money) with it, doing things very much like you did with those catalogs. I'm sitting at 3570 feedback, which hasn't changed since last February. I do need to get back to it, as I was good at it, and the extra money was nice. So, you've inspired me!

Idaho Dad said...

Oh, and YES the box arrived. The kids were ecstatic. I think you have a knack for finding just the right items for people. That skeleton and eye were perfect for our school!

buffalodick said...

I told you on one of my posts- you and I will always find the pony in a room filled with horsesh*t! In sales for 35 years.. How do you tell when a salesman is lying? His lips are moving.. I NEVER lie! I embellish...

Robin said...

Call me crazy... I love what you're doing!

The Italian playset looks a little weird to me.....

Glad to see you over at my place and you're welcome for dinner anytime!

Unknown said...

Hey Marmy, i must say that your pere had a poor grasp of reality when it comes to what you "would amount to"...balderdash!...
...you've done much, will do much more, i'm sure...most importantly, you give love and miles of smiles (along with selling plastic crimples, chinkys and froggies)

...and if you're looking for another business opportunity, i know a band that needs a good manager...

Anonymous said...

Just saying hi!!

Funny post - good luck on making lots of money.

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((charles)))~ sigh..... I try with all my might to be a good parent and to give my lads the tools in life, what they then choose to do with those tools is then down to them.... I hope I have shown them respect of themselves and of others, love, kindness, how to work hard, how to stand tall and proud and how to laugh :).... oh and how to scrump and pickpocket lmfao....xxxxx

~(((ToriZ)))~ you read the lot? lol .... what sort of things are you after..... that sales catalogue has now closed for orders (I know cos I tried to order more stuff lol).... but the normal catalogue is around but at normal prices.. but let me know exactly what ya after and if I can help I will, and ya know I wouldnt even make a profit of ya lmfao....

Nick things from the hospital to sell on ebay, ops I mean, collect soveniers lol....xxxxxx

~((((phil))))~ WOW Phil 3570 crikey you are and old hand lol.... you inspire me :) - so glad your nippers little parcel arrived, I was getting a little worried that it had got lost in the post or nicked and flogged on ebay lmfao.... just thought it would be good for your new schoolroom :).... and it fitted in with the halloween timing lmfao...

I will just hide away me ebay money in me travel account where there is already quite a bit cos I never went on holiday in the summer, all I spent was $800 on a laptop for my Jacob cos we didnt go away...oh and $800 on Sam cos he to didnt have a holiday, on saying that my Jacob did have 2 holidays via school lol....xxxxx

~((((((Buffalo))))))~ yep ya did :) I LOVE sellig things but the biggest buzz I ever got was when I use to own the plant nursery with me X and we would sell what we had grown from seed and cuttings.... the best growers in the south of England we was, and felt so proud when people praised not only our plants but our prices....... :)..... I miss that nursery lol note I said nursery and NOT the tosser lol....xxxxxxxxx

~((((robin and Jay)))))~ ok, calling you crazy lmfao.... you better hurry up and move around or I will put a price on you and sell ya lol....xxxxxx

~((((((((((((((soul))))))))))~ FANKS YOU :) - and, DONT tempt me lol..... my lads band can headline at one of your gigs lol....

Managers often marriage someone in the band ya know lol so I wouldnt wish that upon you lmfao..... ;) - xxxxxxx

~((((((((coral))))))))))~ hey you sweetie.... I dont make lots of money, but it is fun.... xxxxx

The Mistress of the Moonlight said...

I wish I could find that catalog or its equivalent over here. M

Dumdad said...

I can foresee that very soon it'll be MarmiteToasty PLC and you'll be chairman of the board and will be flying from business deal to business deal in your Lear jet. Your blog will be outsourced and written by someone in India. You'll eventually buy the New York Stock Exchange where Marmite shares will soar....

Jen said...

I have actually just started thinking about selling some of the things I have collected over the years on ebay. Sounds like it could be a worthwhile venture. Espcially if you write the descriptions for me! :) Thanks for the inspiration once again. (By the way, I made homemade beef stew and biscuits after your last post. Not bad for someone who usually cooks out of boxes and cans.)

Toriz said...

Great idea, I might as well get something out of the trips to hospital. LOL!

Will send you an e-mail to answer the other part.

Catch said...

I do believe you could sell sand to Arabs Marmie....and its a gift..and you should be proud of yourself for knowing how to survive on your own. I could never sell on ebay b/c I would never get the stuff sent out in time...lol. I would just keep putting off going to the post office and before you know it....lots of disgruntled ebay people would be after me!!! lol

Lora said...

Ask Sprite's mum if I can adopt her...she is toooooooooo cute

Lulda Casadaga said...

Way to go marmie...I purchased many items for my 2nd wedding in 2002 off ebay...my wedding gown was from CA brand new and it was for an auction to benefit 9/11. So not only did I get a deal but was able to right off the purchase as a contribution! LOL

If you didn't have the father you had you wouldn't be who you are today. Oh and when you say "Chinky" it reminds me of my father. He had a little "Archie Bunker" in em....:D

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((mistress)))~ Im sure schools do have them, its just getting access to them :) and as I owned a pre-school for 12 years I still get them, they just dont know I no long has me pre-school lol......xxxxx

~(((dumdad)))))~ :) you daft sod lol this is just a bit of fun and an easily EASILY way to make a bit of pin money for me travel account lol.... BUT, it wouldnt hurt for dam marmite company to set me up with free marmite for life cos of my love and spreading of the word of the 'lord marmite' LOL...xxxxxx

~((((((((((jen))))))))))~ DO IT, Im a bit of a meanie.... I dont give much stuff to the charity shops until Ive shoved it on ebay first lol..... OH goodness, you cooked from scratch :) proud of you girl, and how much healthier and cheaper and easier..... our slow cook pot is used about 3-4 times a week lol.... and tins do have their uses, we use lots of tins of tomatoes to make pasta sauces, the organic tins.... but, Ive no idea what cooking out of 'boxes' means LOL....snuggly kisses to your dear Julianna.... oh and the boys lmfao...xxxxxxxx

~((((ToriZ))))~ stick with me girl I will teach you the art of pickpocketing and sovenier gathering lmfao.....xxxxxxxx

~((((((((((((((((((catch))))))))))~ Im pretty good with the old postage malarkie, but then we have a little post office in the village, as long as the punters pay with paypal I ALWAYS post there items off the following day.... its been like a little production line this past 2 weeks, and I have 8 items on the side all labelled and ready to post this morning......hugzzzzz....xxxxxxx

~((((((((((((lora)))))))))~ YOU CAN HAVE HER lmfao she is mine.... Ive had Sprite since she was 10 weeks old for 10 hours a day 5 days a week :)..... but I will share her with ya lol....... love you lora xxxxxxxxx

~((((lulda))))~ A second wedding... oh my, you mean theres hope for me yet for someone to want me LMFAO..... Chinky here is NOT a racist word.. LOL@Archie Bunker' I thought Biggles when I read that LMFAO....... xxxxxxx

MarmiteToasty said...

LORA - that would be CANT have here lol....... oh shut it, its early and I didnt sleep well and Im knackered before I start today lol - good job I only have Sprite and Jon to have fun with today lmfao...xxxxx

laughingwolf said...

too funny :P lol

Unknown said...

Holy Crap!!! See, you ARE good at something, MANY things it seems! I would NEVER think to do that with a catalogue and I am so very impressed. You continue to amaze me with your life and your stories.

And could Sprite be any cuter? What a doll baby! But I don't think selling children on ebay is allowed, so try not to make money doing THAT, okay?

Like I've said before, I would love to just spend at least one day with you. It would be the funniest day of my life, I'm sure.

Flowerpot said...

I agree Marmie I think you should set up a business school!

Cindy said...

See, you have another "knack" besides being able to sell oceanfront property in Arizona- it's your writing. Don't doubt yourself. I don't know quite how to describe it but I do know that when I read your blog, a real person with wit and heart just leaps off the page. And you write just as I figure you would sound, Toni and I were talking about this just the other day- it's like your readers can almost hear you, British accent and all. We think you could syndicate your column and very successfully too.

Toriz said...

LOL! I look forward to learning the tricks of the trade. ;)

Deanna said...

The bestest thing about your blob is the posts are the best entertainment there is and then the bonus is the comments are just as entertaining! Sprite is such a darling - I love the name and it so fits her. I'm impressed with your ebay adventures - but not surprised.

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((Wolfie))))~ :) Im up to over $900 in the last 3 weeks and Ive paid the orginal bill of what, after I returned some stuff, was only $420.... so Im way into me profit now lol and still I have a pile of things sat next to me still to flog lol.....xxxxxxx

~((((bina))))~ :) Im a bit like 'arfer daily' not that you would know who that was or 'Del Boy' LMFAO.... maybe it also comes from the many years selling our plants at shows etc.. except ya dont really have interaction with customers on Ebay......

Ive had Sprite since she was 10 weeks old and Im her guardian if anything should ever happen to her parents.... I love her with all I have...

Well, I think it would be a laff if we got together lol....xxxxxx

~(((flowerpot)))~ yeah the business school of hard knocks lol..... I use to have a proper career ya know when I worked for the Ministry of Defence, I still have a non child looking after, non plant nursery, non pre-school brain in me head somewhere lol......xxxxxx

~(((cindy)))~ goodness, what kind words... but ya see, when I read me posts back they just sound rubbish to me lol... and certainly with no accent lmfao... I do only know how to write from my heart and soul.... well the hole where me soul use to be, there is just an ache there now where my soul once was...

I do this blob purely for me lads to one day maybe see a part of me they dont always see (of course they dont know I have Twaddle but Im, now we have a new super duper printer/scanner/photocopier.. slowly printing off the posts from the beginning) but others comments are such a joy to read.... I love answering blobbers comments here :)... and NO one would wanna buy my rubbish lmfao - anyone else that reads it is just a wonderful bonus for me....xxxxxx

~(((toriz))))~ so, what did ya nick from ya hospital visit last week LOL..... come on, come on, fess up lol....xxxxxxx

OH and its 5p posting day today on Ebay so there will be loads of sussed and sorted out stuff that my Jacob is sorting out today to flog lol..... I'll teach that boy how to survive if its the last thing I do :)..

HAPPY THURSDAY TO YOU ALL.....

x

~(((((((punkn)))))))))~ :) talking about comments, oh my, some twat off of Ebay emailed me last night.... WTF... she apparently is a childminder and possibly thinks written in blood that we should help each other LOL I DONT THINK SO....

This is the email I received, you can imagine my reply lmfao..

** Dear looniemel,

Hi there I have been having a look at your items for sale. im guessing your a childminder? if so could you please point me in the rite direction to where I can buy some multicultural resources. ive worked in child care 4 6years and now currently registring as a c'minder. not really 1 for bidding as I usually loose lolif you have any items that u have on buy now or best offer please get back to me hope you can help me thaks katie .

- noon**

WTF is she doing on Ebay if she dont bid LMFAO.... my email back was very funny :) if I say so meself..... like I would be telling her how to get supplies lol not that she even could cos she aint no registered pre-school lol....

I did tell her that she could 'buy now' any item Ive posted for $40 lmfao - what the hell did she think I am.... this is strickly business darling lmfao..

.... xxxxxxxx

Leon's current assignment said...

Love the description of the Ex (Mr. Tragic Excuse for Air Consumption) in conjunction with the plates. You do excel at sales, of this there is no doubt.

Everytime I walk up the attic stairs and see what you could sell on eBay, I shake my head and kick myself in the ass. I just don't have the time to learn the ins and outs of that deal. Perhaps when you're stateside we can remedy this, uh, situation. (smile)

Casdok said...

Great thinking and good for you!

Jackie said...

"If you are not content with what you have, you'll never be content with what you want."

Mel, this is a "thought for the day" on a site I receive daily. You inspire me because you seem to be content with what you have...and, you'll be content with what you want.

I loved this post. I once had the "want" of starting a pre-school but circumstances didn't agree with me. I would still do it, even at my age, IF I had someone like you to work with me.

And, just so you know...

"it has been many many years since I got rat-arsed, let alone tipsy even....." (LOL) It is amazing what one can remember in this state of tippsiness...haha!!

Oh, I forgot!! You wrote:
"I dont have any talents...."

Well, that's a crock!!

Great post, Sweetie!!

Millennium Housewife said...

all the words to Land Of Hope And Glory? you may belong in the guiness book of records. No one knows them, in fact I have always doubted that any other words except for the title existed... MH

Anonymous said...

Maybe your ROTTEN parents were really a gift to you. I know that any success I've had in my life is in part due to proving my parents wrong on so many levels and in becoming a kind person and a much better parent and mate then either of them ever were. They were both very narcasistic and judgemental. I work very hard on being neither of those things.

I love me a good bargain too. I'm always bartering for a better price and have sold a few things. Nothing close to your standards and success. As a matter of fact some of the money ventures I have tried ended up costing me money...like the time I tried breeding dogs. Hell the carpet replacement from the little squatters was enough to set me in the hole.

There were a couple of money making things I got into and I did make some mega money but I had to get out of that when I found out that the State Attorney General was coming after a bunch of us. Party pooper, he.

Sprite is a doll and makes me think or Tinkerbell or some other Disney Fairy. I'm glad she has you and you have her.

I say you and Colin go for it. Hell girl...reach for your dreams. And when you come to the states I know I am the first one you'll want to see...save me a room in your B&B...you can even call it the Jolie room. I think number 10 since it is my lucky number. Oh and serve Marmite please. I could help you entertain or like my old boy is fond of saying..."you just sit and wait in the truck, ma"...he's worried I might mess with something and fuck it up. But he thinks I am good to look at so he drags me with him. He thinks we look good together sitting in the truck.

Wow...my claim to fame...looking good sitting in the truck. LMAOLove the toys you have for the kids...and it doesn't surprise me in the least that you are a good sales lady...you are good at what ever you do.

Love you my Mel, Jolie

Anonymous said...

Marmie, you are talented beyond compare. I love reading your posts and if you ever make it across the pond, you could write a book on your adventures. You are always a wonderful read.

I am fasinated with the food sets -- never saw anything like them. Totally cool.

Toriz said...

They couldn't have me in last week 'cause there wasn't anywhere to fit me in and since I wasn't about to drop dead on them or anything they figure I can wait until next week. I'm going in on Wednesday for the op on Thursday.

We did swipe the roll of tape they used to put my patch on when we went to an outpatient appointment though. We're getting low and didn't want to go through the hastle of trying to get hold of more (I can't use the ordinary tape... Even the non-alergenic versions give me a rash and burn my skin after a bit, but the ordinary one starts burning the second it's on my skin). So, I suppose the tape counts... Kinda! LOL!

Scots said...

sbs .. don't ya just love 'em ;o)

We use the company a lot at work ... good stuff.

Have ya tried selling the twat neighbout on ebay? I know you won't make a profit .... but at least someone else will have to put up with him and you can have a well earned rest from his ear bashing! lol xx

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((((((((((((PT))))))))))))~ dam bloody good to see you here :).... I think your description of the Tosser is way better then mine lol...

Im inclined to take a week off and fly over and sort ya attic out for ya lmfao... I would be in me element :).... and Id make ya a few quid into the bargain lmfao....(huge smile backatcha)....xxxxxxxxxx

~((((casdok))))~ :) I do do loads of things for people for nuffin, but sometimes ya just have to have these little extra money making ideas for that bit extra.... cos Im sure another rainy day is approaching......xxxxx

~((((inspired)))))~ Im not always content but on those days I have to give meself a good talking to.... and its not that I aint content its hard to carry an ache where me soul once was....

Do you know I can also apparently recite other hymns when Ive been rat-arsed (many years ago) and I dont DO god, so aint that strange, and even stranger all me lads have biblical names lmfao....xxxxxxxx

~(((milly housewife))))~ welcome to the madhouse - yep then I must be in the guiness book of records OR maybe I was drinking guiness at the time :).... xxxxx

~((((((jolie jolie jolie))))~ I thought a narcasistic was a daffodil lol....

Ya should see me haggle in the markets in cyprus and spain or at the carboots here lol....

Sprite Ive had since she was a baby, and her mum and dad do get upset some evenings when she dont wanna go home lol, but I do have here almost 10 hours a day.... I LOVE her with a passion......

LOL@you wait in the truck story lmfao.... to funny lol its funny cos my Tosser X would often say... 'wait in the car' LOL.... love you to girl.... xxxxxxxxx

~((((out of the blue)))))~ I dont class it as talent I class it as always having a survival head on lol...... Id sell ya grannie for a fiver lmfao....

Fanks for your kind words.....

Aint the little food sets just brill, Im sure you must have them over there with all the multicural stuff you got....xxxxxx

~(((((ToriZ))))))~ dam and blast girl at you having to go in again.... want me to poke someone in the eye for ya lol....know I will be thinking of you.... just try and nick something a bit better this time lmfao but you've started good LOL hahahahaha told ya stick with me and I sort ya out lol.....xxxxxxx

~(((((((((((Scottie))))))))))))))~ will you stop keep making me worry about you and ya bits and McTavish... gawds sake....

Yep sbs :)... but I only get off the sales catalogue, do ya wanna buy something off me lmfao....

I aint seen me twat neibghbour for a while, I hope he aint died without telling me lmfao......xxxxxxx

Anonymous said...

Marmie, you are absolutely right. I haven't worked with the little tykes for some years, but I did a little Google search and, sure enough, I pulled up mulitcultural foods sets -- Italian, Chinese, Hispanic, and Japanese. Clever little Bento boxes and all. Live and learn.

You're like my mom -- she can cut deal with anyone for anything. My daughter can, too. It is a talent and I sure don't have it.

Toriz said...

LMAO! I'll do my best. ;)

And, if you want to poke someone in the eye for me then go ahead... Just don't let it be my surgeon, I'm pretty sure he needs both eyes to see what he's doing to do the op. You can do it to his receptionist or any of the nurses on the ward though. LOL!

Anonymous said...

plural nar·cis·si \-ˈsi-ˌsī, -(ˌ)sē\ or nar·cis·sus·es or narcissus [New Latin, genus name, from Latin, narcissus, from Greek narkissos] : daffodil ; especially : one whose flowers have a short corona and are usually borne separately
...

a daffodil and an egocentric person who thinks only of themselves. I much perfer the daffodil in the stead of the parents that were so gauche and vain. public wayof saying greedy sel-centered assholes. I suppose we all are to a degree. That's why I have to work so hard to curb my own behaviour.

you are the clever one my gal...
love you Mel...
J-

Christy Woolum said...

Wow... you do need to do an online class on the Selling of Sand to the Arabs and Other Tips for Making Money. Hey... now remember with that travel money next time you are coming out west!!

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((((out of the blue)))))~ ok now Im gonna have to google and see what else is about and how I get it a cost price lmfao...

You wait till you hear the deal I cut with our new trampoline LMFAO....xxxxxx

~((((ToriZ)))))~ sharpening me poking stick lol.....xxxxxx

~((((((((jolie jolie))))))~ now I will look at all nasty weirdo peolple as daffadils lol and I'll just smile :)..... I aint clever, Im just canny lol....xxxxxxx

~(((((InlandEmpireGirl))))))~ I did do all the paperwork for our plant nursery so I do think I have a little bit between me ears lol.....

Do you know, I would ring up different country show organisers knowing you have to book a pitch 2 or 3 years in advance, and I could ALWAYS ALWAYS get us into a show with our plants :) - the gift of the gab we call it over here lol..... It was imperitive that first year we were really to display to get in the big shows, we could NOT wait 3 years for a place....... I even amazed meself lol....xxxxx

Lora said...

Hey you.....I decided to start a blog as well. Need your input on alot of stuff, so email me and we'll put our heads together and come up with the right format.

anya said...

Ok, this post is a big inspiration. Ebay and Amazon (for my enormous library I want to lovingly let go of) are the route to mini riches (or just a new pair of boots and a better quality of wine) for me while I wait with bated breath to see if the stock market ever comes back. I wish I had your financial head. For those of us out on our own again, I can't think of a better quality to possess! Sounds like your father was just dead wrong, girl!