Tuesday, 22 July 2008

3 Daves....... And A Load Of Twaddling Bollocks...

Ok......... so last week I spent yet another 5 days in hospital..... I had to be at the Naval Hospital for 7.00am..... which in fact I didnt get there until 7.20.... I signed in at the gate and got me car pass into the place and found a parking space almost next to the sign where I needed to be.....

I had me stubborn head on, hence I drove meself.... Ive never left me car overnight there before and I know the pass I had was just a day pass, but what the heck lol.... Im sure they dont tow ya car away and blow it up without at least checking who has signed it in and having a quiet word LOL....... As I locked me car up, I did have funny visions of me car being surrounded by the naval guards and being blown to kingdom come LOL....

Cos I was a tad late, it was a bit manic.... I was quickly shown to me bed, making sure I kept me eyes focused forwards so I didnt have to see all the morning toothless dribbles from the elderly as they awoke.... believe me, it is NOT a pretty sight..... then pangs of guilt, cos I know Im probably not to far off of this state of old age......



This is what I could see out of the window behind me bed...

Within 10 minutes of me getting there I was shoved a gown and told to quickly change cos I would be first on the operating list cos me consultant wanted to make sure I got that extra time to get more benefit from everything that would be happening..... so me consultant rushed in... and had a quick word with me and so did me anestatist and I hurriedly signed all consent forms.... everything was such a rush and a blur that I could of been signing me kidneys away to the kitchens for making Steak and Kidney Puddings for dinner.....

IVs were dug in me hand once again and my bed prepared for the wheeling down to theatre....rush rush rush..... which was good cos I had no time to think about what was going to happen..... no time to gaze around and give encouraging smiles to the little ladies that had just had a knee op the days previous (If only they knew what could happen when things go tits up)....

Much military staff around this week....... MMMmmmmmm mmmmmmm lol looks like the ward was staffed equally by the army and the navy this time.... not one civilian nurse or doctor in sight....much wearing of cammos and army boots LOL...... suits me Sir lmfao....



Ya just gotta love blokes in uniforms lol.....thats Army on the left and Navy on the right lol...... see the chap on the right, he was naval and was on me Ward when I was in 11 weeks ago....... he smiled the biggest smile when he saw me walk in the Ward that morning..... and he just said..... oh my, now we are in for a laff..... little did he know I had my quiet head on lol.....



This is the first Dave...actually his name was not really Dave but that is what he got everyone to call him cos his real name was unprouncable lol..... this little naval nurse was the most sweetest, funny, caring, softly spoken, beautiful soul, I have yet to meet in a hospital.....he had the most amazing 'come to bed' voice lmfao...... he was originally from Mauritius... and he was my saviour in the coming week.... we laffed and giggled late into the nights, when I couldnt sleep cos of the machines I was on, he would come and disentangle me so that I could hobble to the telly room at the end of the ward late into the night and he would sit and talk to me....and he would make me cups of tea and find biscuits and even a blanket LMFAO..... he was just so funny.... and just LOVED being in the medical services of the navy..... he had been at the Naval hospital for only 9 months and was loving everything about it....... ya know when you come across someone in a job that you KNOW is there true vocation.... then little Dave had found his...... even the little old lady that had soiled her bed one night, I listened to how he handled it all...... and I just knew he had a heart and soul of an angel....

I was sat in me bed all ready to be wheeled down into theatre when Mr Action Man the Army bloke in charge came to me and said...... MAM WE DO NOT SEEM TO HAVE YOUR PAPERWORK... when did you come for your pre-op....... to which I replied.... well, I actually didnt, cos I only heard Friday that I was coming in today....... oh, he says...... so no MRSA squab up to date cos it only lasts 6 weeks and it was 11 weeks since you had ya knee replacement......... OK OK all STOP....... me consultant came back and said that I WAS UNCLEAN lmfao.... meaning that I couldnt be first on the operating list JUST INCASE I had MRSA...... and they cant take no risks with everyone else, so instead of cancelling the op.... he said he would put me LAST on the operating list so that there was no risk of me infecting everyone else that had ops that day in Theatre 3..... cos obviously then everything is sterilized after that....

Oh lordy...... how come NUFFIN EVER does just straight with me lol...... there is always a hiccup.... so that meant I had all day to fester and worry and sit with the old and infirm and dribblers of E6.... Luckily I was tucked down the end of the ward, this time I just wanted to keep meself to meself and not have to really chit chat with anyone....and there was no one either side of me and I was sort of opposite the little office and not really opposite anyone....... so I got me book out and just read the hours ways....

At just gone 4 I got the nod that I would be next down..... so after taping all me bangles up and me ring and me top earring that dont come off.... off I went.... I TOOK ME CAMERA just incase lmfao......



This is the clock on the side room to Theatre 3 :).... this is when I got busted for having me camera with me lol



This is the threatre nurse that obviously didnt mind me camera lol

I was suppose to be being knocked OUT for this op, cos for certain reasons it was NOT to pleasent to be awake for lol........ but the anethestis.... was not to kean on that and wanted me to have a spinal block, cos he was reading through me notes and realised that I dont do to well under full knock out.... its on me notes from all the other knee ops Ive had over the years.... so him and me consultant was sort of having almost a domestic arguement in theatre about it lol....... I had to say..... oye you two DONT worry about me being here will ya lol...... now smile for the camera will ya lol....



This is Dave number 2, this is me consultant...... he said....... oh no, not the camera again LOL...... but he posed and smiled anyways lmfao.....

It was decided that I was to have the spinal block and not be put fully out..... to which I said, then you better be playing some LOUD music so I dont hear nuffin.... so with bent back I was cold sprayed and the spinal was threaded into my spinal cavity..... and we waited.... for the numbing sensation to kick in....... and we waited...... and waited.... and Dave Number 3, yes the anethetist was also called DAVE lol.... well Dave number 3 pinched me and looked at me and asked if I felt that...... to which I said, if you pinch me once again I will get up and bitch slap you..... so he laffed and said I take that as a yes.... so we waited and waited, and me toes went tingly but I could feel them and me bum went tingly but still I could fell the pinches and pokes...... he said..... ok.... well, that aint working, I said DONT you dare do anything if I can feel it...... so he said, I will have to put you right out after all....... Dam...... so thats what happened..... I had the spinal AND was knocked out by the gas mask..... I dont do the gas mask to well and so he held me hand LOL.... see EVERYTHING ALWAYS GOES TITS UP WITH ME....



Dave number 3 LOL....... whats with so many Daves....

Before I went out I talked with me consultant and I made him PROMISE that he would not take me leg off if he found things in there that he couldnt deal with.... I made him PROMISE that he would not make that decision....... he promised me.... so I put my trust in him......

When I woke up in the recovery room..... sick as a parrot LOL....... also numb from me bum down cos the spinal had kicked in during the op LMFAO.... I looked and saw this huge pile of blankets...... I thought it was a cage thing over me leg I THOUGHT they had cut it off cos I couldnt feel anything lol due to the spinal tap working... the huge pile was where as soon as the op was done they had put me leg on a PMM - Passive Movement Machine, where it would spend the next 24 hours for the next 5 days, keeping the bend moving and free from everything.....



This was the machine of torture lol...... it was important to keep the bend open so that all shit inside has no chance to adhere again and obstruct the joint..... keep the joint moving also means less chance of infection......

He had bend me leg whilst I was under and had ripped and tore all the built up scar tissue and muscles which had adhered to the bionic joint making it unmoveable.... he had then scrapped all pus about that he could find and cut out all infectioned flesh around the bionic knee and bone graft..... he said I would be in a lot of pain over the coming days and they would do their best to drug me up, but it would not completely take it all way........... and Jebus was they right or what lol.....

The machine automatically moves and bends ones knee to 110 degrees 24 hours a day, I only came off this machine for to go to the loo and for me dinner and a few hours in the late evening when I couldnt sleep and little Dave would untangle me and disconnect me and let me wheel me IV stand to the telly room where he would bring me tea and biscuits lol.... its hard to sleep with the continous movement and noise from the machines........

ALSO........ when I was in theatre a little old lady was admited to the bed next to me..... and SHE COULD SNORE FOR ENGLAND.... holy cow....... if I ever snore like that when Im old, please if Im married, I hope whoever is sleeping next to me would shoot me....... I DIDNT KNOW WOMAN could snore like that...... Jebus, lordy......

On the Wedsnesday night it was so bad and me and little Dave was laffing and he told me to go in and poke her LOL...... oh my we laffed so much....... so I tiptoed in and gently touched the old ladies shoulder and whispered..... hey, hey sweetie, you need to sleep on your side, your snoring and everything is rattling..... Dave was giggling..... cos with that, it must of startled her and she sat bolt up right and flung her arms around catching me on the side of the jaw with such a force it knocked me backwards LOL....... moral of this story..... DO NOT try and wake a snoring old lady cos its like going 2 rounds with Mike Tyson LOL...... she didnt remember in the morning, but little Dave told everyone and they kept giggling at me...... the following night I told him that I was going to stuff a sock into her mouth cos that would stop the snoring...... and just for that tiny second, he looked at me as if I was serious lol

Adding NON SNORER to me list of potential husbands in the future LOL

Everytime I went to the loo COS I DONT DO BEDPANS.... I had to walk past little ladies in beds with Auntie Nora hanging on the ends of their beds and I got fed up with the constant.... oh my how come you out of bed and walking if you only had your knee done yesterday..... I didnt like to upset them and explain that it had all gone wrong and they should be prepared to possibily be back in a few weeks lol.... I so didnt wanna keep explaining or scaring anyone....... so I just told anyone that asked that I was just in with an 'ingrown toenail extraction' LOL.... I did get some funny looks and smiles from the staff, but how could I explain all thats gone on to these frail scared looking gumless elderly ladies.....

So for the most of the week I just kept meself to meself and did all that I was suppose to do...... I did have many staff come sit on me bed and chat with me, the ones that had reckonised me from weeks ago.... they was all smiles and one little chap said that was so far the BEST 8 days of his services at the hospital...... he said those 8 days he will remember with smiles and laughter forever...... WTF..... whats that suppose to mean lol

I did have ONE disagreement with the old posh lady that was in the bed next to me...... I had the window open, they only open about 8 inches at the bottom, but I NEED fresh air and this hospital is so hot and stuffy....... and the window had been open for 3 days when this woman arrived, and without asking she just shut the window.... SHE SHUT THE BLOODY WINDOW and didnt ask anyone if that was ok...... well actually IT WAS NOT OK lol....... so I disentangle meself from me machine and hobble round and open it again....... its COLD she says....... put on a cardigan I says....... its breezy, she says......... aint it lovely, I says......... I will get a chill, she says....... does that mean you will be making those involentary shaking movements with a chill, I says.......... what? she says........ well, lets put it this way....... people have run around for 2 days for you, at your beck and call and you aint even had surgery yet, you are one of the walking all singing and dancing patients.... yet you expect everyone to run around for you and fetch and carry for you.....next you will be asking me to blow ya dinner cos its hot....... WELL........ the only enjoyment I have is the slight breeze and fresh air coming from the slightly open window..... SO...... Im sorry if it upsets you.... BUT open it stays...... and with that she pulls the curtain across between us and that was the last I saw or heard of her LOL I so WISH I had stuffed that bloody sock in her mouth when she snored...... I had all evil thoughts rushing through me head LOL



I didnt have much chance to write to me 'cor blimey doddle' penpals cos the machine I was on didnt allow me to sit up straight to write and cos me leg was up and down up and down on the machine there was no way I could do anything but balance a book or magazine on me leg....... you can just see me foot sticking out the end of me book LOL.....

Anyways, I came home on Friday about teatime..... drove meself home, me car was not blown up, how I drove home I do not even remember...... thinking I shouldnt of been so drugged up for the journey home lol

The weekend was a painful struggle, so it was lovely to talk to the Toadies on the phone and to JBelle and France me blob matie in frogland...... so fanks you lot for helping to keep me chins up......

The bend had declined a lot over the weekend without the machines to keep the movement..... no matter how hard Ive been doing all the physio exercises, I know things are already stiffening up.......

But I had physio down at the hospital yesterday......they put me on this 'torture chair' as they call it...... it has weights on it and it pushes back against ya shins so bending ya leg backwards whether ya want it to or not lol....... the pain was excrutiating... and the tears flowed freely.....but it has to be done...... when the physio put on another weigh he stepped back cos he knew there was a chance that he would be getting a punch where the pain was so intense LOL...... the thing about this 'torture chair' is that your actually strapped in LOL...... I dont know ifs so ya cant leap out and thump someone or if its to keep ya legs still...... so I had a very intensive session with me physios...... very very painful..... and many tears cos the bend is NOT as much as I left hospital with last Friday....... anyways..... Im doing the very best I can...... I can do no more then what I physically can....

I guess what, I get to do it all again on Wednesday and again on Friday and again 3 times next week and for forthcoming weeks.......tomorrow I will take tissues....

But through the tears and the pain Im still smiling and still trying to be me...... Im okay........ really I am...... I think LOL....... I have to beat this...... I do not want to think of the consequences if I dont... I refuse to think about that step....

This time in hospital I asked that me maties didnt come visit me....... I didnt wanna see no one..... and I didnt want no one to ring me....... I needed time to think about so much that has happened of late.....my body, heart and soul have been dragged to such depths of late and its all been very overwhelming..... so I didnt want any one to come........ which was a little hard in the evenings when every other bed had visitors lol...... but it was my choice..... Ive had decisions to make, serious decisions that will affect my future.......

The first thing Im going to do IF/WHEN I get well, is to get me house up to scratch and move away from everything I have known......... to start again somewhere else....... to finish me life in a new place, a new challenge..... uproot and begin the last part of that life somewhere else........ be it in England or in some foreign land, of yet I do not know.... but I know its now or never..... cos I know if I dont carefully dig out me roots, something will come along and pour weed killer over me and I will shrivel up and die a lonely old lady.....

Anyways....... enough of all this bollocks...... its gonna be a hot sunny day here today.... could this really be the start of our summer.......

The Schools break up on Wednesday for our 5-6 weeks summer break.... and I have to try and think what to do about a holiday for me and my Jacob and possibly my Sam.... do we stay here or do we fly somewhere where I could get a real proper break, a chance to recharge..... use me emergency dosh thats hidden in me hiking boots..... the worlds out limit, we could go anywhere..... anyone got any suggestions...... I KNOW where I so really want to be..... Paradise is in my soul...... but alas....... alas......

If you have read this rubbish down this far, then you need to seek medical advise for your insanity LOL

X

59 comments:

Mei Del said...

you drove home?? lordy marmie! i woulda gladly have come and driven you home. and i'm sure you're not short of good friends who woulda helped ya. well the last thing you'd be wanting is a telling off i guess so i'm gonna shut up now. except to say the daves who looked after you had better done a proper job this time. ok ok ok i'm off. please take care of yourself and keep laffing xx

ChrisB said...

I wondered if you would manage to get your photos this time and I was not to be disappointed.
The snorer sounds a pain in the butt I bet you were pleased she kept the curtains drawn!
The physio sounds pretty painful it made me wince reading about it!
It's a special gift to make people laff even when you don't really feel like it. You deserve a nice relaxing holiday after all you've been through :)

Lady in red said...

glad to hear you made it through, anytime you need anything I'm not far away.

I had thought I might see you at Haslar last week but my mum's op was cancelled shes now going in next week.

Lisa said...

Thank God I got all them billboards up warning the general population that Marmy was DRIVING HERSELF HOME, folks! Stay off the roads!! I've heard snickers about yer driving on a good day, sweetie!

I wish I could think of s good suggestion for your vacation. My first thought was somewhere with a beach, but all that sand might bother your leg. The shed is almost cleaned up (nah!), so you could come here and help me move mulch??

Glad you made it out with yer parts intact. Sorry about the snoring... it's not really my fault, bad nose job or something... I'm working on it!

cast in the name of god, ye not guilty said...

Hooray! Glad you're feeling somewhat better, or are out of hospital at least. I've been strapped into some pretty torturous machines in physical therapy, but I think you're definitely takes the cake. I'm surprised that you didn't just tell them to bloody well leave you alone!

<3 ((HUGS)) Melody II

Lora said...

You sure could write a book, and I think ya should do exactly that. Move to a nice area of the world that offers ya peace, and put pen to paper. If ya cross the pond during the 5-6 wks off, let me know. I'll catch a flight to meet ya.

Charles Gramlich said...

I'm glad you made it through OK. I had terrible lack of movement in my left arm after my left shoulder was broken, but some therapy it came back fully. Good luck with everything, of course.

Lehners in France said...

Toastie, a great new post. God my heart bleeds for you with the painful physio. You've got to keep at it, work your hardest. I decided over the weekend I'm going to cycle 20km per day in honour of your knee. I fell off the big horse and Sunday (arse photo posted of course), but I'm doing it Toastie for you and it hurts, but I'm doing it. Hugs and hands from over the channel. France x

JBelle said...

This ain't no dress rehearsal, girl. This is life, the genuine issue. If you have things you want to do, get to it! go for it! Because you won't get another chance. I am so very proud of you for getting tough on this rotten new knee of yours. You'll tame it soon, no doubt. You have so much to look forward to....

jolie-jordan said...

Seems like this visit was better then the last one so I hope that means you will fair better with the recovery also.

Go somewhere where it is breezy and warm and just kick back and relax. Eat good food...read good books...draw and paint...sleep...rent movies...take short walks and people watch. It would be great if you could be by the ocean and listen to the waves.
Watch beautiful sunsets.

FOR SURE YOU SHOULD DO SOMETHING SPECIAL...JUST FOR YOU.

Keep getting well Marmie and keep your spirits high.

I like your plan to begin a whole new chapter for your life. I have been talking about that for a long time too. we don't get all that many chances.

Good thoughts from me to you.
Love...Me
xxxJolie

Blossomcottage said...

As if you have not got enough to do, I have given you another task!

I am here to tell you that I have tagged you!! Little Veg Patch tagged me and now its your turn!
Instructions on my Blog.
Blossom

laughingwolf said...

with your sense of hee-haw, could not have pictured any other post from you, mt ;) lol

get well, soon!

Lee Harris said...

You are an extraordinary women. As always, I enjoyed your tale. I'll be sending you good thoughts as you go through your rehab.
Come to Mexico!
Ajijic is just outside of Guadalajara (fly into Guad) and is in the mountains and next to Mexico's largest lake. It is beautiful here -- the best weather in North America -- great food -- great people. You don't have to know any Spanish. There are thousands of Europeans, Brits, Canucks, and gringos in the area.

Frum Helen Back said...

I will suffer with my insanity because I'm hooked on reading about you're life. Everything is such an adventure. I do believe I would be afraid to go to England and need an emergency operation. I've never seen wards like that on this side of the pond. Guess we're spoiled. I hope you will soon be as good as new Marmie.

Bina said...

Okay, so I read the WHOLE thing! But I don't really consider myself insane. Just different! LOL

Lord woman. You have really been through the ringer with that knee of yours. Wherever you decide to go on vacation, I sure hope you enjoy the heck out of it. Go somewhere warm and sunny, with lots of sand and blue water. That would re-charge anyone's soul!

I love your stories.

JeanneH said...

Yep! I read the WHOLE thing, too! I love the stories you tell ~ I check each day for a new one!! You amaze me, Marmie...as much as you have been through, and as despondent as you COULD be, you still find something to laugh about ~ and to make US laugh about. You are stronger than you think you are, girl. The fact that you were only in for 5 days when the doc said at first it could be, what ~ 10-14 days? I believe you're doing well. I have a friend here in Idaho who has been through the same thing you have, as far as the knee replacement, then the 2nd surgery for the scraping, or whatever, and then more surgery to repair something else that went wrong...you are not alone!! But as ever, you are in my prayers for a full and speedy recovery...keep up the good work...Love Ya, JeanneH xoxo

LadyStyx said...

So glad you're home again. That first David sounds like a real sweetie....definitely found his true calling.

*HUGZ*

susan said...

Mel, I couldn't say it better than JBelle, so I ditto what she says. You are in my thoughts daily.

Tori_z said...

Sorry to hear you're in so much pain. *hugs*

I don't do well with the masks either. I drift off quickly with the anasthetic though so putting me to sleep I don't have issues usually, but if I wake up with an oxygen mask on... Put it this way... Me vs three doctors and I won. I don't like those masks and nothing was going to make me keep it on. Eventually (after I kicked a doctor or two) they got the message though.

Anyway, hope things start to go right for you with your knee. *hugs*

Wherever you decide to go on holiday... I hope you enjoy it. :)

soul pumpkin said...

you are one of the bravest and funniest souls i've ever encountered, Marmy...i know that the physio is pure hell, having been through reconstructive knee surgery, but each day it gets a bit less hellish...
...i would heartily suggest a trip to the desert southwest (here in americay) though at the moment, it's hotter than the hinges on the gates of hell, speaking of Hades-related things...
love&hugs
SP

Intense Guy said...

I read the WHOLE thing twice and some parts three times.

:)

Goodness, I'm glad you got home okay - driving under the influence of who knows what medication.

So, please tell me, who was happier to see ya, Mabel or Cedric?

ciara said...

whew! i finally got thru that. i read part of it earlier today, but i had some errands to run, so i had to come back and finish it. LOL

wow, (((((mel)))))), you sure have been through a lot. hopefully, the physio goes well...i'm sure it will, cuz i know how much you don't want the alternative.

lora's right...you should think about writing a book about your life...insert the blog stories in it...it would be a best seller. then you've had all the dosh to go wherever you wanted! i know that all of your readers would by the book...i would. love ya, matie xoxoxo

Pamela said...

I would think a vacation that had lots of swimming (easy kind) would be best for your recovery.

A warm clean ocean beach -- a handsome physical therapist named Dave --and a guy named Dave that serves you drinks where you're floating in your chair.

Coral said...

Hey, kid, I am going to phone you a bit later - and will explain why I didn't phone Friday!

Great post, you sound pretty well.

How are the boys holding up?

How is Sam's shoulder doing?

buffalodickdy said...

Hope it works this time! Wishing you a speedy recovery!

Dumdad said...

Great post and I did read down to the very end so, obviously, I need mental help!

Yes, go for your dream whatever it is. But remember the grass isn't always greener on the other side of the fence or even The Other Side of Paris.

Generally, I like living over here but there's much I miss about Britain despite everyone knifing each other as a way of greeting and then puking up over each other.

A change is as good as a rest, for sure, but always have an escape route just in case.

Bon courage!

Ol' Lady said...

I'm glad to hear that your still kickin :)

Robin said...

You sound good, Mel. I'm so sorry about all the pain you're going through. Continuing to send good thoughts!

Word Tosser said...

Ok, this is what you do... figure out what time you are having your actual therapy... then take a pain pill 40 minutes before... If you don't take pain pills anymore.. then take a pain aspirin..30 minutes before.. it will help the pain..

Next .. were to go.. well, I would suggest taking a pin and put it on the world map...but with your luck you would land in Iraq... so just head to the beach... white sand, blue water and skies... and not in Iraq...lol

Idaho Escapee said...

Marmee, baby...yer still alive! Great! In the winter of 2005, I was almost an invalid. Bone spurs in my lower back made it almost impossible to move without my spinal cord STABBING me, plus my gout pain had infiltrated EVERY SINGLE JOINT in my body. The coming spring (2006), I spent a whole lot of money on doctors. I secured treatment for my gout (a drug I'll take the rest o'my life), and I had three steroid shots in my lower back, and although I'm still fairly brittle, at least I got most of my health back.

I told you all of that 'cos when I read that maybe you'll pull up stakes if you recover, well, that's what I did. I used to live in North Idaho (I even met Blob-master DFO); I'd lived there all my life. Well, I told myself, 'if I ever can get well, I'm moving to OREGON, and where I sit, the Pacific Ocean is only 2 miles away and I saw the sun set over the horizon tonite. Absolutely beautiful. Dark days indeed, the winter of 2005, and maybe these are your dark days...keep the dream alive...you know I wish you all the best.

FINALLY, I don't think you know my first name. It's 'DAVE'. I kid you not!

ciara said...

p.s. at least these dave's aren't tossers like me ex LOL his name happens to david, but when i first met him everyone called him 'dave'

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((mei del))))~ LOL@lordy.... I was ok driving home, I had on me stubborn head lol....xxxxx

~((((Crispy))))~ well, where I go me camera usually follows lol.... I never mean to make people laff lol.... xxxxxx

~(((LIR)))~ ok, come and do me mountains of ironing if ya not far away LMFAO..... sorry ya mums was cancelled, I did look out for her on the Friday morning, not that I would of known who she was lol.....xxxxxx

~((((lisa)))~ oye, there aint nuffin wrong with my driving, Im one of the best, ask anyone around these here parts LOL.... Im a rally driver inside this old body..... oh how I would of loved to do rallying...

I was sad that Sharkie never let me drive his car whilst over in Maine last summer.... I would of LOVED to of tried to figure out how to drive on the wrong side of the road and have to do everything mirror image lol..... I did take his car for a spin around a carpark whilst he was inside a shop once lol he came out and the car was NOT in the same place he had left it :)....

Beaches are good except I HATE others on beaches lol....

Woman that snore is way bad, I kept asking the nurses if I snored whilst I slept..... all said NO... praise the lord....xxxxx

~((((guilty)))))~ well, even if I had told me physios to bugger off they would not of listened lol they know they can push me and push me so they wouldnt of taken notice of me if I said SOD OFF lol...xxxxx

~((((((((((((((((((lora))))))))))))~ I owe you so many emails, Im sorry, Ive not been emailing anyone of late...I will catch up soon, I promise, could you tell Sir-H I'll email soon.....

I cant write no book lol what the hell would I write about?.... I know there is change in the wind....I can feel it in me waters, unless thats where Ive just wet me knickers...... I so wanna meet up with you oneday, oneday it will happen and then you wont speak to me again either LOL....xxxxxxxxx

~(((((charles))))~ Ive had physio twice a week since April, but they couldnt get the bend anymore then 45 degrees cos of swelling at first and infection and then due to the scar tissues had built up around the new bionic knee..... but now with this physio after this op its different, if we dont keep the knee free, there is more likelyhood that infection will once again come back so this new physio is different from the last 10 weeks...... dam it hurts LOL....sorry to hear about your shoulder....and fanks for sticking around, maybe normal service will resume shortly lol.......xxxxx

~((((((((France))))))))~ cripes hope your bum is ok..... how lovely it was to speak to you on the tellybone.... how comfortable you are to talk to, it was as if I had known you a lifetime.... fanks for that........and as very painful as all this is and has been.... I have good feelings about it all this time.... but then I aint been to hot on good feelings and vibes of late lol......xxxxxxxx

~((((((((JBelle)))))))~ I know its not dress rehearsel and Ive wasted so much time this past year that I can never get back.......that dream went crashing around me ears...... I also have others to consider first before I come into the reckoning.... but soon, things, they are a changing.. dont know about the 'so much to look forward to'.... thats so hard to find focus when one is on their own...love you.....xxxxxxx

~((((((jolie))))~ I just felt part of the furniture on this last visit to hospital lol...

There is SO much, so very much that I didnt get to do last summer whilst in Maine/America.... I wasted much time.... I got to comfortable and settled instead of doing all the dreams I had and wanted to do on that visit..... oh well, cant get that time back..... I have this thing in my soul to fly over to the east coast and hire a car and just drive where me spirit takes me and somehow end up on the west coast....

I owe you also so many emails....... soon..... im sorry....xxxxxxxxx

~((((blossomcottage)))))~ gawds sake lmfao..... ok, I will pop over and ave a butchers.... I DONT do questions to well though lol....xxxxx

~((((((((Wolfie)))))~ 'hew-haw' WTF lol ya make me sound like a donkey lmfao....and whats ' could not have pictured any other post by me' mean :)....xxxxxxxx

~(((((lee harris)))))~ hey you.... mexico.... wow you live in mexico.... dam, I dont wanna go where there are any of those bloody Europeans lol...... maybe I'll come and visit ya one day ;)....xxxxxxx

~(((((helen)))))~ LOL@adventure..... its just a normal boring mundane life ya know..... I look around and see others with such excitement in their lives and I do sometimes wish I had one of those to share with someone speical besides me lads..... and yep, ya insane LOL....xxxxx

~((((bina))))~ pointing at you and chanting INSANE INSANE INSANE..... I will get over to your blob this coming next few days, I have to much to catch up with everyone.... Im a bad blobber.... sorry....

I dont even know if a holiday will happen this year, the money is there, sometimes its so hard to have to think for everyone else instead of just picking up and buggering off on ones own for a while......xxxxxx

~(((((JeanneH)))))))~ I received your lovely letter yesterday, I will write soon.....

Im ok, Im not down.... sometimes a little sad cos I have so much to sort in me head about things and people, and its hard, but Im ok, still me stupid self with me maties etc.... just so knackered thats all lol......

Hugs to your friend, hope all goes well there.... tell her/him Im thinking about them..... and sending them 'The Chair of Torture' for their recovery lol.... I took a photo of 'The Chair' yesterday lol it does look like something out of a lunatic asylum from the 1920s lol......xxxxx

~(((((ladystyx)))))~ that little Dave was just the bees knees....and yep, he had found his vocation....xxxxxx

~((((((((((((((Susan))))))))))))))~ Ive had to think of others and put others first all me life, so it will be hard to think about what I want/need.... especially after this past year.... I have others to put first still in me life before I come into the picture, just hoping its not all to late by the time I get around to sorting me out.....xxxxxxxxx

~(((((soul)))))~ oh shut it with your daft words, dont make me have to come over there and man-bitch-slap ya lol.... I aint brave and I aint funny and I dont know where I lost me soul....... I had all me ligiments reconstructed in me other knee and that went pear shaped to LOL and that was not major compared to this shit now.... but this physio now is like being tortured by aliens in comparison lol....... dam about your knee, what did ya have done?

Oh we rode on the ride HADES at Wistconstance Dells a few years back... that time, I think a little bit of poo came out lol.... I dont do to well in HOT.... it took us 3 days to aclimatize to the heat in Maine last year and thats cold compare to the desert LOL....hugs backatcha....xxxxxxx

~((((intense)))))~ twice? 3 times? YOU OFFICIALLY GET THEN INSANITY chuftie badge lol wear it with pride...... ARE YOU MAD lol....

Mabel was....and Janet of course lol Cedric might have been please judging by the noises he was making lol.....xxxxxx

~(((((ciara anyones for a slow read and a sniff of a Dave's armpits)))))~ there can NOT be an alternative......

Lora is WRONG on this count lol..... love ya to....... xxxxxxx

~(((((pamela)))))~ Im thinking it would be nice to have a culture shock and go somewhere different.... I know I will probably end up this year going nowhere though lol.....I do feel cornwall beckoning, but I have to see how I fair with the pain and walking and me knackeredness....... I just know I WANT to let Jacob have a good summer, cos he also will not get this year back.....xxxxxxx

~(((((((coral)))))))~ fanks for rining yesterday, it was so lovely and sweet of you.... you are to kind...... Sams doing ok, back to skateboarding and drumming, he has an important gig this weekend..... trying to see if I have the energy to go and watch.....xxxxxxxx

~((((((((((Buffalo)))))))))~ well if it dont then that will be it, done and dusted whilst Im in me prime lol.......fanks you......xxxxxxx

~((((dumbdad))))~ passing out insane vouchers to all that read to the end, to be redeemed at your local looney bin for a weekend break lol..... dam, give me the voucher back, I need a break lol....

I know the grass is not always greener and it would be much easier to be doing it with someone special to share the scarieness with, but alas, I am only me.... but its just something I feel I need to do before its all to late....

Sometimes the familiarilarity (sp) and history of a place or of people does not always mean its right to be their or with that person...... sometimes one has to take that leap into the unknown, I know if I was on me own and me lads grown then there would be NO hesitation.... I would be sold up and gone.....xxxxx

~((((((ol lady))))~ I also owe you an email, I need to explain so much to you..... soon, ok? I promise..... kicking gently I am lol..... just, barely holding on by a thread.....xxxxxxx

~((((((((robin)))))))))~ I have such a high pain threashold, so I and me physio's know that when something hurts me then to most it would be well off the scale LOL.....xxxxxxx

~(((((((((tosser))))))))~ Im back on strong painkillers and a concoction of drugs again.... and yep I drug up half an hour before me appointments lol.......

Knowing my luck I would end up in afganistan lol........

I dearly want/need to be at Paradise..... thats where I feel the pull......xxxxxxxxx

~(((((idaho escapee)))))~ Dave :) ya mean ya aint really named idaho? lol...... cripes about your gout and bone spurs.... it all sounds so painful.... sorry......

see you upped sticks and moved....... only difference I have still me younger lads to take into the equation..... I know my Jacob so wants to more then anything move to america.....and he would come with me anywhere, I feel he to has a need in him to start afresh and to build his life elsewhere.....

You watch the Daves come out of the woodwork now lol....

All Daves please sign in here lmfao......xxxxxxxxxxx

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((((ciara anyones for a fiddle of a Dave)))))~ OMG he was a Dave to lol.... the only Dave I can think of thats nice is 'surferdude' he to is a David....now he is a sweetie Dave LOL......xxxxxxxxxxx

Queenie said...

Well its my pre-ops Monday I will get them to check my sanity. Bin through it haven't you gal, you doing good!!!!
I'm not sure if you've reassured me or not, just wondering if Dr Gorgeous will let me take his pics? Your so unlike me, I want everyone to come and see me, anyone don't care who they are (my big sis as timed her holiday perfect, she will be away). The hospital is so far away from home I don't think I will have many though (you could always pop up and see if you would like it here LOL). One thing I will say my dear friend PARADISE is where you make it and I know with your guts and determination "YOU WILL MAKE IT"...

Lady in red said...

lol I will gladly do your ironing, I'll swapp you for my mountain of ironing

Tori_z said...

I read all the way down too... But I already knew I was insane, so that's OK. LOL!

Hope you're doing OK. *hugs*

Tori_z said...

And, btw... I think they only let me go home so soon because I was a trouble maker and wouldn't do everything they wanted me to (they wanted me on an oxygen mask, but I HATE those masks and the smell makes me sick so I refused it). Besides, I was breathing better without it... They were just worried I might not be because I'd gotten so dehydrated before the op that my stats dropped and when they gave me something to bring them up it turned out I was alergic to it and I completely stopped breathing.

It also probably helped me that I've been in hospital enough times to know how to get home quickly. *winks*

little wanderer said...

OMG hope you drive an automatic car, how the hell did you manage to drive home! think the only good thing about being in that hospital has to be the men in uniforms...........
yes get dug into that emergency cash and get away on a proper hol you so deserve it. x

Pecos Blue said...

Wow you drove home....that is amazing. I am sorry you had to go through all that but I hope the worst is over and you will be as good as new.

A poster would be lovely esp from England!

Take care..thank you for stopping by.

In_spired said...

Geeze, Marm! What a story! You're one strong, brave girl!! Hang in, and hold on. Things will work out.

Blessings, Sweet Girl!

(please give in and let Jacob have a dog!! check my blog again for one last picture of Max)

JeanieSpokane said...

Hugs to you, Marmite. Big hugs. I laughed out loud about the snoring roommate - AND the hoity toity window closer. Some people!

I know exactly what you are saying about starting over. I think we hit a certain age and, well, we just need to start from scratch. Come to Idaho or Washington. I am putting my little house up for rent or for sale (and YOU don't want to go there!). I recently had my cell phone stolen right out of my purse while I was paying for a snack for me (a block away from that little house). When I realized it, at first I was so so. I was real dull about it - but the more I thought about it, the crazier I felt. And now I'm to the point that it's the last straw. I live in a really poor neighborhood - lots of renters, lots of drugs, lot of bums, people wandring around, walking down the alley behind my house at three in the morning. It makes me feel creepy. I have been hanging on to this little house with my finger nails - it's MINE, paid for, all MINE. But this last little deal was the straw that broke the camel's back.

Your humor is your blessing! Laughter is the best medicine. You make us laugh - and we hope we come even close to that for you.

All my love! And - really - move here. We love you!

Anonymous said...

hey ((((mel))) you and the boys are always welcome at my home.. so if you need a break.. you can come here.. oh yea.. just remember I have three girlz in wheelchairs!

I would take some days off and we could go visit the man in the skate shop at Madison... :)

slb said...

I dont know why it said I was anonymous.. this is slb... lol

meggie said...

I read to the end. Goodness, you sound just like one of my friends, & maybe you will be! haha.
I do send goodvibes for your knee. You realise you have sent shivers up my spine, & scared the crap out of me, since I have to have a knee replacement one of these days!!

Thankyour for visiting mine, & hope you had a laugh or two. I had some here, even though your plight was dire!

Flowerpot said...

You are incredible Marmite. Keep smiling you are one gutsy lady. Everything will wrk out - I know it will. Yuio'll make it. Take care xxxx

Cedar Street Kid said...

Wow.one great detailed post. You will make it just fine. Glad to see your post.I have been wondering how you fared. Kepp up your spirits, and always laugh.

Inland Empire Girl said...

Now.... I think the Pacific Northwest is a beautiful place to visit this time of year... particularly in the Dingleberry Land of the Inland Empire. DFO would probably just let you be a visiting writer for HBO online! Now I have heard I snore up a storm... so I guess it will only get worse when I get older... lordy!! Keep up the positive thoughts.

Maggie May said...

That was mighty interesting! You have a terrific sense of humour & write in the most compelling way! I am really glad you are back & that things are going fine. You are one plucky lady!
Lets hope that's the last of the ops!
Was lovely to see you on my blog!

Slip said...

Welcome back! Great to see you are in good spirits with all the bull shit you went through.

Any of those Daves the one that kept a dead girl in a cave?

Mei Del said...

i save lordy specially for you :D stubborn head (me shaking my head) one day we ought to go rally racng together - wouldn' that be fun!

LadyStyx said...

Just droppin in to see how you're doing today. *HUGZ*

Anonymous said...

I think anytime we read your stories we all read them to the end. They are entertaining, at your expense of course. I hope things are getting back to normal and life is starting to seem okay again. It's been a long struggle with a little more to come, so good luck and keep up the great attitude and lovely humor. Imagine me using the word 'lovely', unheard of but appropriate here. The Stickman

Tori_z said...

Hope you're doing OK and not in too much pain. *hugs*

MarmiteToasty said...

SORRY I AINT BEEN AROUND MUCH........ IVE TRIED TO GET BACK TO WORK PART-TIME EVEN THOUGH ITS AGAINST ME CONSULTANTS WISHES... and its been difficult cos Im so exhausted.... and schools are off now for the summer which brings all its other stresses of a constant house full of lads and their maties all but moving in lol....and trying to juggle all that with me horrendous 3 times a week physio appointments... Im thinking about not going this morning.... anyways....

~((((Queenie))))~ GOOD LUCK for ya pre-op, I will be thinking of you.... pre-ops are a doddle though :) - Paradise is a little wooden 100 year old cottage in the middle of the woods in NewHampshire.... those that know KNOW :)...xxxxx

~(((LIR)))~ do you know when me matie mad Moira use to live near me with her 4 kids, we would sometimes swap ironing piles, just so we had different things to iron lol....hope you mum is well...xxxxx

~(((((ToriZ))))~ yep, you as mad as a march hare lol...... I only found late late last night a beautiful email from you from days and days ago.... Im so sorry I aint replied, it was in me rubbish bin and I usually just delete all thats in there, but I had a quick look and there you were..... I will email later, Im so sorry I missed it......xxxxxxxxxx

~(((((wanderer)))))~ yep its an automatic, which i hated at first when I got it 2 years ago now, I LOVE driving so an automatic was a cop out, but it came up at the right time at the right price and most importantly of all, at the right colour LOL..... as far as a holiday goes, I do not know what Im capable of as yet....xxxxxxx

~((((pecos)))))~ nice to see you here :) - I will try and think of a lovely poster to send over the seas.....xxxxx

~(((((Inspired))))))~ I certainly dont feel strong at the moment, just completely knackered lol.... still thinking about a dog, I keep checking TheArk at Stubbington in Fareham which is the rescue place, cos it would HAVE to be good with kids (cos of my job) and good with chickens lol..... but dont know as yet, Im thinking about moving and it could be abroad and then all that added hassle about a dog.....but at least I suppose it would take our minds off the fact that we would NOT beable to take our beloved chickens with us :( xxxxxx

~(((((JeanneS))))))~ I have researched amongst me maties the case of snoring woman..... AND 2 of me best maties snore..... bloody hell lmfao.... It came as a shock, I know I make gurgling noises if I have a cold but snoring NO WAY lol.... Im thinking about moving to the left of the staples..... :) goodness your place sounds like its in a wellabit rough neighbourhood lol.... GET OUT OF THERE GIRL.....and STOP with the nice words will ya lol....xxxxxx

~((((((((((Jan)))))))))~ I owe you an email, I owe so many people an email :(.... oh my, didnt we have fun with that bloke in the skate shop lol..... my boys still think fondley of our time with you, and we take the good bits from the rest of the visit...... sad so sad that that friendship died, so very upsetting all round when we think a friendship is for life and then realise it aint...... where as, no matter how far or how long between emails, ours is for a lifetime, sorry girl but your stuck with us...... love to the girls and grandma Jones....xxxxxxxxx

~((((meggie))))))~ welcome to the mad house.... yep, I think we could be friends, you have to take a few pages of tests first though lol.... please scroll way back on me blob and find some not so DOWN posts :).... I use to be quite fun lol......xxxxx

~((((((((flowerpot))))))))~ your blob is such a joy to me, although I do not always comment, I lurk around......Im not incredible unless you mean incredibly knackered lol...xxxxx

~((((cedar)))))~ sometimes laffing is all I have, but its something that I could be locked away in a looneybin for lol.....xxxxx

~(((((InlandEmpireGirl)))))~ from what Ive seen on the blobs to the left of the staples, it looks like the most amazing place....one day I might get over that far... I think DFO would ban me from anywhere near the newspaper company, he might think Im a bomb threat again lol..... say NO to snoring :)....xxxxx

~((((maggie may)))))~ LOL@compelling, yep your compelled to not read it all and just bin it.... I can only type whats in me head and how I would talk for real... fingers crossed on the last of the ops, I have a feeling its not though lol.....xxxxxx

~(((((slip)))))~ a dead girl in a cave? ok now you have me intrigued lol.....xxxxxx

~(((((mei del)))))~ I so would LOVE to have a go at rallying.... me maties say I drive on the roads as if Im driving a rally car lol..... and you should of see me when I drive my Tom's boy racer car LOL.... with the fat exhaust and the paint job that changes colour as you drive past.....xxxxxxx

~(((((ladystyx))))))~ tired, knackered, exhausted, hungry, bored but other then that just fine and dandy LOL.....xxxxxx

~((((((Stickman)))))~ you truely read to the end lol...... I could type for england so the saying goes lol.... and when ya get me on the phone, well ya could be on there for hours with me twaddling rubbish lol..... ask Sharkie how much I can talk for England.....what? you dont use the word 'loverly' over there? LOL... much love...xxxxxxx

~((((((ToriZ))))))~ email forthcoming......xxxxxxxx

Lehners in France said...

Toasti, you HAVE HAVE HAVE to go for your appointment. I did my bloody bike ride yesterday in 36 degrees and full sun! Today it's p*ssing down and I'll do it again for YOU! A few weeks hard work so outways the alternative, don't forget, I know. So juggle them balls (any of the Daves will do) girl and go for your work out. Everyone that's worked so hard for you will be so disappointed if you don't. We all know how it feels to be disappointed in someone don't we. Have a great day and wear a leotard and legs warmers!
Lots of love France (((XXXXX)))

Tori_z said...

My e-mails keep going straight in the rubbish bin with you for some reason. I don't think your e-mail server likes me. LOL!

Cindy said...

I read all the way to the end too- wouldn't have missed a word. Glad to hear that that part is over for you- just hope you are on the mend now and that the therapy is getting easier each time. And hey, if you decide to hop across the pond, you're welcome here anytime! Let's see, we have Niagara Falls not too terribly far from here, Letchworth State Park (even prettier than the Falls)even closer...we might even have a "Dave" or two kicking around somewhere...

Akelamalu said...

Oh honey you've been through the mill haven't you?

I've been away on holiday (went on the 17th)and just got back yesterday, so I have a lot of catching up to do.

I truly hope this latest op is the one to do the trick, you know I'll be keeping my fingers crossed and sending Reiki every day.

Arizona foreclosures said...

I had thought I might see you at Haslar last week but my mum's op was cancelled shes now going in next week. Rubbish Bins