How Strange....Two Peas In A Pod..... Shirley Temple Swivel :)

Ok............. just a quickie today........

Ive been in me photo box again........ there is no organisation there is no filing..... they are just in the packets in which they came back from the chemists (thats where we get them developed).....and many are just loose and mixed up........ but of course now with digital its more instant..... but I LOVE looking through hands on photos....... me lads did buy me one of them photo machine things that connect to me computer so I can print off well proper photos when I want to.....

Anyways I found these 2......... cant see it meself? - what do YOU reckon?.........



This is me......... Im 3, well thats whats written on the back....so it would be about 1960 (yes Im well bloody old)...... this is one of the old photos that I rescued from the rubbish bin....... when me mum and dad got divorced they sorted out the family photos..... they gave me sister Sandra all the photos of her (she is 11 years older then me)... me mum also gave me older brother Paul every photo that had him in so he had sort of roots (he is 2 years older then me), she also sorted through all the photos of me younger brother Des and gave him a pile (he is 7 years younger then me)....... she carefully bundled each pile up and tied them with a ribbon.......

There was no pile for me......... I didnt even know me brothers and sister had been given a pile of memories until one brother asked if I wanted a copy of one that had me in it....... so I went round me parents house to collect my pile of memories....... only to be told they were in the rubbish bin..... LOL.......

That is the gods honest truth........

She, my mother, was a wicked mother on many counts..... she had dumped every photo of me in the rubbish bin...... I went home to my little house and thought about it...... with no photos of me, it was as if I didnt exist..... it was as if all record of me has been rubbed out......... so the next day when I knew the house would be empty, I went back and rummaged through the bin...... and found only a handful of old photos of me...... some had been ruined with plate scrapings all over them, some had been torn up....... but I managed to gather maybe 10 photos of me........... to me they are so very precious....... I DID exist.......

Anyways....... enough of that bollocks.....

I just found these two photos real strange.......... the above photo in black and white was me aged 3....... this following photo is one of me lads at the exact same age............. :)



Now is that uncanny or what?............

so........ enough twaddle for a Sundee...... enjoy yours whatever you may be doing.....

x

Hoovers And A LoveBird Named Bones Dont Mix.......

Ok.................. What you must understand is, that, I dont have much luck with 'hoovers', I think me doodle maties call them 'vacuums', and yes I know that the word 'hoover' is actually a make of vacuum cleaner, but over here the word hoover has taken on the whole of the vacuum names....... its just how it is.....

Anyways....... as I said, I dont have much luck with them, for one reason or another I get through 'hoovers' at a rate of knots........ for why I dont know, its not like I even use them much LOL....... there is much more in life then spending hours upon hours hoovering......... ya kids wont remember a spotlessly shining house, what they will remember is the getting down on the floor with sticking and glueing and time spent in the woods etc...........

Ya see, again yesterday, me hoover kept stopping..... sort of like it was overheating..... it was a good excuse NOT to hoover LOL........ Ive only had it just over a year and it cost over 100 quid...... so I rings me matie and says, thats it I need to buy a new hoover....... whats up she said.... so I explained....... well you and hoovers so dont mix........... I said it was probably to do with me sucking up the water in the cats bowl just to see if the suck was strong enough....... oh god she said, you dinlo...... ok ok, so it was an experiment that went wrong lol

So this morning I went out and bought a new one........ its well bleedin posh...... its a Sansung Jet-Propel Bagless :)....... ha.... and it was on offer in Argos, half price offer of the month, it was only 75 quid ($140) instead of 150 quid ($300) BARGAIN :)........

Well, whilst I was sat there with me matie waiting for me goods :) (ok ok so I bought a PINK FLOWERED 2 person tent as well lol)........ I said to me matie.......Jebus, I had a nightmare with me mums hoover once....and I started to really giggle.... ok, she said, spill the bloody beans..



This is the tent I bought today with the hoover :) ok and a matching sleeping bag LOL

Let me explain.......... me mum had this lovebird........ I always called him/her bones cos it was well skinny.... it was pretty little thing, but it was sad cos it lived on its own cos its mate had died and me mum had never got it another partner.......... well........ this happened about 10 years ago......... I was married at the time and even though me mum hated me I would still do favours for her if she asked, she only ever wanted me when she needed something....it was just before the 'lets not talk to Mel for 3 years' stint....... life aye........ so she was off on holiday with me dad, it was a time before they had got divorced......and she wanted me to go in her house and feed 'Bones' whilst they was away and make sure it had water and the cage was cleaned out....... well me mum had one of them 'modern' new fangled cages...... well wicked if ya ask me....... tall upright thing it was..... and unless ya bloody bird could hover up and down there was no way it could fly in there.... so I nipped round to feed Bones and clean him out...... well me mum had one of those upright hoovers....... and the cage had loose sand on the bottom........ and me being me...... couldnt just scoop the dirty sand out could I....... NO I bloody couldnt....... I decided it would be loads easier if I hoovered it out with the pipe attachment...... ya know then I wouldnt have to even come in contact with lovebird poo :)....



Bones was exactly the same as this bird......

So I drag the hoover out of the cupboard, plug it in, open the cage door and turn the hoover on and stick the pipe noozle in the cage and begin to suck up the dirty sand........... all was going great....... what I didnt realise was that with an upright hoover (in those days) the excess air that was suck up the pipe shot out the front of the hoover..... well the little air vent was just at eye level to the perch that Bones was sitting on....... he was scared stiff of the noise and the pipe and with a WHOOOOOOOOOSH the air from the hoover blew him with such force off the perch and before I had time to think ........... I suck him up the pipe....... LMFAO........ omg omg Bones was sucked up the pipe in a split second........

Jebus........ I quickly turned the hoover off and tried to think want to do...... I called........ like a bloody dinlo down the end of the pipe....... Bones bones come out and even put a handfull of seeds in the end.......

OK Im sooooooo laffing whilst typing this and me matie this morning was laffing so loud in the shop that the man came out to ask her to keep the noise down LOL

Well, I shook the pipe of the hoover thinking that I could shake Bones out the end....... nope, that didnt work........ so I had a great Idea......... I looked down the pipe and couldnt see him, so I thought well he must be probably half way down...... I will have to cut the pipe in half......... so I goes and gets a kitchen knife and start to saw through the pipe............ well I ask you....... have you ever done that? no? well DONT.........cos do ya know the pipe has like a twirly spring coil thing in it LOL....... thats how it can stretch....... Im sawing and pulling this spring thing and its getting bigger and still NO Bones to be seen.....

By now Im really panicing....... me mum LOVED this bird....... yes she actually loved something in life........ and I knew that she would YET AGAIN be disappointed in me........ least I was to old for a leathering :)....... so no Bones up the pipe, that only means one thing.......... he must of been sucked right up into the hoover dustbag........ so I open the back of the hoover and pull out the dustbag and listen for sounds of life.......... nuffin......... not a dusty squeek....... nuffin........ so I get the knife again and split open the bag and spread the contents out all over the floor........... my mums clean spotless floor.......... ya see me mum was a cleaning freak, maybe thats why I aint lol......... and there in the middle of the pile of dust and sand was Bones sort of coughing lol well probably choking was more like it....... I grabbed him and flapped him around in the air to try and get the dust off and blew in his face to try and get some air in him lol......

Now me mums lounge was covered in a thin layer of dust but Bones was alive, so all was good.......

I shoved him back in the cage on the perch........ it took a few attempts cos he kept falling off and landing in the bottom of the cage, which now had no sand cos I had sucked it up the hoover lol..... I eventually managed to sort of prop him up against the cage and began to sort out the mess I had made....... I couldnt use the pipe obviously lol cos it was all stretched and cut up lol........ so I shoved that in the dustbin 3 houses along - ya know, get rid of the evidence - and tried to suck up the mess with the normal bit....... forgetting to replace the dustbag LMFAO....... jebus bloody hell dust was flying all over the place........ 3 hours........ 3 bloody hours of dusting etc before me mums room looked anything to the standard in which she left it..........

I fed and watered Bones with many 'Bones Im so sorry' etcs........ well me mum came home and there is NO WAY ON THIS EARTH that I would of dared tell her what had happened............. she never asked directly where the hoover pipe had disappeared to........ and of course there was no way I was gonna say :).......

Two days past....... me mum had told me that it looked like Bones was moulting and that he was off his food....... oh I said... how strange *giggles* *fear*...... well by day 3 Bones didnt have a single feather on his entire body LMFAO........ it was the funniest thing I had ever seen in me life......... a completely naked lovebird..... oh my goodness......... funny funny funny........ I did offer to knit him a little jumper, but I was told 'THAT AINT FUNNY'........ it was the shock you know that made him moult... all the trama of it....



He sort of looked a little like this...... except this is a featherless chicken, but it gives you an idea how Bones looked.......


Well Bones only lived for just over another week.......... I should of owned up........ but I didnt........ I would now, own up I mean......... but me mum aint around no more......... so looks like I got away with that one.......

Well by the time I had finished this morning telling me matie this tale...... she had tears running down her face........ :) I dont think its funny... not really LMFAO....

RIP BONES............ I didnt mean to kill ya.......

Way to much boring Twaddle for a Thursday...........

x

Chicken - It Aint Just Any Old Chicken - Its JANET

Ok........... After me daft post on Friday, I thought I would update ya on the Chicken front....

Ya see, I have always loved chickens, and when I was married and we owned a little plant nursery, I use to keep a few chickens up our land....... had the most amazing cockeral called Colin he was a Polish chicken, black with like a white wig, he was sooooooooo tame....... but I when I got divorced me X got the business and custody of me chickens and I got the kids and the bills and the mortgage ..... lol - but I have still always loved chickens....... and then along came Janet :)



Most of ya probably know that I found a chicken a couple of months ago now, outside our junior school, so I picked it up and tucked it under me arm and with a brood of nippers in tow I bought the chicken home...... Janet had come to live with us...... and oh my, what a joy she has been.....

Ya see, the thing is with this house, or maybe its just me, no matter what pet or animal or stray we have come into our lives, they aint normal, there is always something weird or strange or unusual about whatever lives with me...... that goes for me X husband to lol........ maybe its me, maybe I have vibes that say....... ok weird things of the world..... its a free house at Mels :)......

Anyways...... back to Janet....... ya see, she aint just no normal chicken, she is special........ let me explain....

Every morning when I get up, me first job is to walk down me little garden and open Janets coop....... she has this little house with a run, but I never keep her in there, I just open the door and she has the run of the garden...... so every morning at around 7 I flip flop in me slippers down the garden and open up.... she scurries out and stand next to me looking up....... gods honest truth...... I have to say..... come on then Janet, lets go eat..... so I walk back up the garden and she follows at me heel :) - when I stop she stops when I walk she walks........ so back to the house I go, followed by Janet, in the back door I go, followed by Janet.... yes she just walks in the back door and stands at me feet while I put the kettle on for a cuppa tea and she stares up at me waiting for her breakfast...



Here she is just this morning....... note me pink fluffy slippers lol

This chicken seems to love me with a passion........ I keep telling her that she AINT a dog and that she is a chicken, and she should be out in the garden doing what chickens do best...... but she just wont have it....... she eats out of the cats dishes and she snuggles up with fat cat if he curls up in the basket in the kitchen.......



This is Janet sharing applie pie and a bit of a pork chop with fatcat... :)

Ya see, she dont realise she is a chicken...... she really dont....... if the back door is locked then she just climbs through the catflap....... as I type this blob she is sitting at the foot of this chair.... I wont be surprised if she dont lay her egg at me feet.....



Me cats just take her in their stride....... the minded kids just love her and love that she wanders in and out the house as she likes..... one of me parents came last week to pick up his kids, he had a dog with him, and I was out so he was sitting in the garden when we eventually came in, he was laffing, all alone in the garden like some lunatic...... he said...... Mel you run a mad house, I walked up the garden with the dog, your tail-less cat shot up the garden and through the catflap followed by your fatcat FOLLOWED by YOUR CHICKEN..... I would not of believed it unless I had witnessed it with me own eyes...... he was laffing so hard, when I just said..... I know aint she great lol - only you he said.... why am I not surprised he said lol....

See, when I came in from being out for the morning or day...... Janet can usually be found nestling in the veggie basket....... well its her basket now and the veggies have been put elsewhere......



Janet LOVES rice...... this is plain ole boiled rice, but she much prefers special fried rice from the chinky...... or even better she prefers egg fried rice, but I try not to give her that to often cos it must be liKe eating ya nephews and nieces.... well the egg bit that is.......

Ya see, I have a safety childs gate thingie across me kitchen door, to stop the babies going out into the kitchen..... its one that opens so ya dont have to climb over.....and evenings and weekends without the nippers here obviously the gate is just open....... BUT OH NO..... not now, cos Janet has decided that she would rather explore the rest of the house........ so now we push the gate around... BUT OH NO Janet has worked out how to push or pull the gate open enough for her to squeeze through....... I tell ya, this aint no NORMAL chicken....



I think I LOVE this chicken....... daft right? but I aint bovvered what people think.....

Me matie Wendy (sleddies mum) said on Friday that cos of Janet she has decided it would be nice to keep a few chickens....... she has a well big garden and a huge house....... so chickens they got over the weekend...... with phone calls of....... Mel, how do you get your chicken to be so tame, Mel why dont our chickens come in the house, Mel our cat hates the chicken what should I do, Mel we wanted our chickens to be like Janet........

Well ya see........ me and Janet are different :) Janet like me, DONT run with the crowd..... neither of us be normal LOL........ as you have probably gathered if ya have been a reader of this blob......

Me and Janet are special :)......

Ya see, Friday, I was sitting on the floor helping Ellis (minded nipper) build the happyland track, he LOVES JANET, Ellis is 3..... so we are sitting there and he says....... Mel Janet is watching us...... so I says, she wants to come play Ellis, and with that, she pushed open the safety gate and just walked right in LOL......





Here is Janet having a butchers at what we were doing lol

I felt bad yesterday when we BBQ'd cos I made chicken kebabs, I try and shield her from the realities of life......dont want her to know that we have eaten great auntie Maud, and uncle Fred...... but thats life.......



Janet seemed really interested in the lid of the BBQ lol..

ok...... things Janet loves and does not love to eat.......

Loves..... special fried rice (we order her her own portion from the chinky when we have chinky take-away), pizza (she prefers stuffed crust Texas BBQ), cheese (red leicester, but she likes a bit of stilton), prawns, chips dipped in mayonaise, ham, boiled eggs, lamb stew, burgers(lamb ones), melon, cat food, she LOVES marmite on toast and Special K Breakfast cereal....

Hates .... Banannas, grapes, beef sausages, strawberry jam, custard and the man next door........ this chicken has class lol she can obviously spot a twat tosser of a neighbour from 10 yards lol

When I wear me orange and red flowered docs, she pecks the laces and trys to sit on me feet......... she loves me boots as much as me.........



She has given us one egg a day from about the 3rd day we got her........

Im hoping Janet lives for a long time.......... cos.......... I LOVES ME CHICKEN..... so, IF ever a blokie comes into me life...... it will have to be....... LOVE ME LOVE ME CHICKEN...... we come as a package :).....

So just a light post after me deep post on Friday....... probably bored ya to tears just as much........... but see me face.... does it look like Im bovvered? I think not.....

ps....... me lads noticed yesterday afternoon, that everytime I coughed (got a bit of broncitis) Janet would come running from wherever she was in the garden and would stand infront of me clucking real LOUD and flapping her wings LMFAO..... Tom coughed and nuffin, Jacob coughed and nuffin... as did Emma and Sam, NUFFIN....... I cough and she comes running again and starts with the loud clucking and flapping LMFAO........ she loves me :)

Enuff of the Twaddle for a Monday, cos Im as busy as hell.......

x

What Does This Picture Say To YOU? ........

OK......... so yesterday saw me drop nine off for school and pre-school, which left me with just the 2 babies..... I didnt wanna go home, so I decided to have a little drive down the back lanes to the next village and explore some of the little lanes I aint been down before...... If you go up Pit Hill the road disappears and its just a track which comes out near Speltham Hill..... no one really uses these back lanes except for the people in the well old beautiful houses set back from the tracks....

I know I needed a good cry yesterday so it was nice to just drive and drive and cry and explore ....... I stopped every so often in the middle of the lanes and snapped a few photos...... Im quite pleased with them.......

The first so sums up how I felt yesterday......... see what that first photo says to YOU..... Im not much of a photographer, BUT I so like this photo.... to me it says it all...



This is the lane I was driving down..... if Lynn is reading this........ this photo is what I was on about before.... with no pavements...... this is the road I want to be on....



The field seems to stretch on forever....... I sat by this field whilst the babies were sleeping...... just sat in the sun for maybe an hour..... the photo does not do it justice........ it was so yellow so brilliantly yellow it almost hurt me eyes to gaze into it.....



This tree, or dead tree, its life strangled out of it by the ivy....... well it says it all......... it was a sign I think........



This little lane/path I will go an explore this weekend on me own, I couldnt leave the babies in the car to go and see what lie at the end of this tunnel.... but over the weekend Im gonna go back and see where it leads..........



This little lone bluebell is ME :) this side of the fence, whilst everyone else is the other side lol



This last photo is of the same bluebell woods, except I reached through the barbed wire...... it is nice BUT it didnt grab me and shake me like the first bluebell photo......



See, I can do boring posts to ya know....... just in a reflective place, thats all.......

Enuff boring Twaddling photos for a Friday.......

x

It Was Only A Bloody Starling - Gawds Sake...Piles My Arse...

Ok.......... So yesterday was Sunday and we are having amazingly HOT weather here for this time of year....... yesterday was like the weather we get in the middle of summer......... so I pottered about me little garden, tidying it up so that me minded nippers can get out there in the coming week......... then I thought Id ring JBelle and have a chat, cos we aint talked for a while........... gawds sake, she could talk the hind legs off a donkey lol........... anyways whilst on the phone, one or tuther of me lads would poke their head round the door and make hand signs meaning they was hungry LMFAO.......... so the next head that popped round the door I just said........ FIND SOMETHING AND YOU COOK IT......

So almost 1 1/2 hours later when JBelle eventually hung up the phone ;) I wandered out the back garden to the lovely surprise of a BBQ in full smoke and the table spread with a cloth and plates and cultery and drinks all ready......... BLIMEY....... so that was nice...... I didnt have to do a thing..... sorted......... so there we was munching away, when my Tom says, mum can we get the guns out........... MY EYES OPENED WIDE AND IT FELT LIKE ME HEAD was gonna explode.......... no No NO I said, not after what happened last time........

Look, let me explain....... last year I think it was, we was having a BBQ in the back garden, I think me doodle maties call it grilling or a cook out, which sounds a tad daft if ya ask me....... you must understand that me little garden it typically turn of the last century LONG THIN garden..... but we dont have houses backing into us, so its quite nice........

We dont have guns as such, not like doodles do, when I say gun it means like a BB hand gun or a BB rifle.....but they could have ya eye out..... and often we will get them out and set up a target down the garden, but after a while that does tend to get boring.......

So there we was, soaking up the sun, munching on kebabs, and things when I spy this Starling bird on our telly aerial way up on the roof....... so as a joke I says, we could always pop the starlings off the roof....... go on then mum, said my Ben...... me, well I cant shoot for toffee, and I aint into killing things thats for sure....unless its slugs.... so I says....... ok give me the rifle....... so I takes aim at this little starling KNOWING that there was a 10 million to one chance that I would hit it, ya see the rifle didnt even have them sight things...... so I aims, and pop...... :( OMG OMG the poor starling topples backwards and is dangling from the aerial........ I do give out a scream where me lads were clapping and jumping around like I had just shot some mass murderer........ jebus, my stomach churned and my head whirled, what had I done...... there was this starling dangling from me telly aerial, probably just minding his own business and having a break from his screaming chicks......... but, I'll tell ya what, there was no one more surprised then me, and though I felt sort of sad there was this great beaming gobsmacking YEAH bloody hell......




Well we couldnt just leave the poor thing dangling from me aerial, so I suggest that my Ben climbs out of the bedroom window (we have bedrooms in the attic) and go and retrieve the creature so as least I could give it a well proper burial..... so a few minutes later we see him emerge from the bedroom window and start climbing onto the roof with shouts of 'becareful you dont fall' ... he crawled up to the aerial and untangled the dead starling and with that instead of climbing back through the window, he decided to lob the bird off the roof instead of carrying it through the house, so he shouts 'CATCH' - with that I run down the garden out of the way.....well the bloody bird only lands right in the middle of our little BBQ....... OMG well funny......... funny but well gross...... thank goodness we had already cooked our meat....... so after the laffing died down, we looked around at what else to have a pop at...

You must remember that ya allowed BB Guns in ya own garden, as long as ya dont fire over ya boundary fence....with our gun laws ya not even allowed to carry the gun outside the house in ya car, if you get caught with one in your car you get well done........ ... so the aerial was on my roof so techically we was ok........ but we had scared the other starlings along the rooftops to the aerial about 6 houses down the road.......... knowing that we was NOT allowed to shoot over the fence and also knowing that there was no way that we could even pop one, we did it anyways LMFAO............. ya see, there was no one around, and its only a BB rifle right?........ so Julie's house was the target....... POP omg the starling flopped off her roof and fell into what we thought was her garden..... we waited about 5 minutes and the birds returned, and POP another fell into her garden...we was getting well good at this...... we then heard shouting over the gardens of 'what the f**king hell and words of that nature, so we was giggling and hiding behind the fence......and I say, ok thats enough, lets stop....... so me lads wandered down the garden a little ways and was shooting what I thought was a target they had set up down the garden, I thought this cos I shouted....... WHATS THAT NOISE....... oh its just a target mum....... so I thought nuffin more about it and started clearing the plates etc.......

Thirty minutes later there is a very loud knock at me door, which I open to face 2 young coppers........ hello are you Mrs Mel (obviously they didnt say that, they said me last name)....... em, I says, it all depends on who is asking and what Im supposed to of done... *sweet smile*....... Emmmmmm do you or does anyone living here or anyone visiting own a gun....... a gun, I says, what a real gun...... yes the copper says.... what a gun with bullets....... Im presuming yes he says.......... see Im thinking, well our gun DONT have real bullets just BB pellet things......no officer, but what seems to be the problem............. someone, he says, has been shooting birds off Number 56s roof and there seems to be PILES OF THEM on their conservatory roof....inside Im laffing so hard at the vision of piles of starlings on their conservatory roof - gawds sake we only hit 2 thats hardly piles.... me, blank staring........ piles? I says, PILES? the only piles I know of is the piles that me mum use to say we would get as kids if we sat on the cold front step.......... this is a serious matter madam he says....... oh, I says........ please explain 'piles' ....... so he says, have you or do you know anyone in these premises that have been using a gun within the last hour........ because not only are their piles of birds on Number 56s conservatory roof but their very expensive Satellite has been shot at and has holes in........ oh my, I say, I didnt even know they had a satellite dish...... it is down the bottom of their garden madam, if I could have a look in your back garden I will be able to see if it can be seen from your garden...........

panic panic panic.......... have you got a warrant I casually ask...... to which the second copper burst out laffing....as did I...... I think you watch to much telly he says.......... oh I says, obviously something that Number 56 wont be doing for a while, if there satelite is knackered......... ok ya better come in........... and with that my Sam walks in the front room to see where I am..... ONLY CARRYING THE BLOODY GUN....... lol...... oh my I says........ where did you find that........ yeah right like they would fall for that.......

So we came clean and spill the beans... and they told us that its illegal to shoot over the gardens, be it up in the air and its highly illegal to shoot at someones satellite dish.......... but ya see, when me lads said they was shooting at a target, they actually were, cos the plonker bloke at number 56 had only painted his dish like a target........ what a wally............ so we was told off and had to promise NOT to do it again....... and go and apologise to the people at number 56......... so we sent Jacob LMFAO........

So yesterday there was NO WAY that I was gonna let them get the BBs out....... no way no how.......ok ok so I folded and we set up targets amongst the giggles..... it was a good 6 months before number 56 spoke to me again.......

Some people just aint got no sense of fun............

Ok, Ok, I know its not nice to kill things, even though starlings over here are classed as skankie pests........ and I would NEVER do it again....... ever...... well, not unless it was edible.... ok, maybe not even then....... Sorry :( if by killing these poor minding their own busines starlings anyone is offended...... then Im sorry........ and if you could see the look of guilt and sadness on me face then you would forgive me....... or not........ I aint bovvered though....... sigh

To much boring Twaddle for a Monday......

New Toy, I Must Be Mental - BIKES PART I - Unleaded Petrol and 2 Stroke Oil

Ok.......... So last weekend was a mix of things for me, shared secrets, AND a new toy....... well I say a toy but in actual fact its not a kids thing...... even though this machine is small and tiny ITS made for adults, they are illegal to use on the road and now if the police catch ya they automatically confiscate them and crush them......... yeah well they have to catch ya first.......... :) - sorry me solicitor maties LOL

Dont be fooled by the smallness of this baby, she is quite a throb between ones legs........ and to see my Tom at 6' 4" on it going hell for leather down our little road is very funny to see .......

Ok here it is, this is our new toy.....and just look at that beautiful boy sitting on it lol



This is what we call over here 'a mini/midi moto'.... look we had NO plans to buy one of these, afterall they are well expensive... and some of me older lads maties have them and race them up their well off parents property, well ya see we only have a weenie garden, use to have a bit of land when I had the plant nursery, but no longer....... so me lads have always sort of drooled over them and inwardly ached for one LOL ya see I KNOW these things......

But it just so happened last friday that we was in the garden juggling, well trying to, when me phone rang and it was a matie and he just said........ Mel, mini moto, do ya want to buy one......... so I says, hello Steve(me maties hubby)...... is it nicked? .... no.....Does it go?...... sort of........ how much?....... 30 quid ($60)....... Steve, I will send someone over to get it.... it better NOT be stolen.... Mel its not, gawds sake......... actually Steve is as straight as a pubic hair thats been through the mangle........

So, that is how moto came to live with us........... :) dont know where or what we was gonna do with it, but I thought, well if push comes to shove I can flog it on ebay and probably get about 150 quid for it LOL.........

Ya know, just sometimes, I wonder what it would of been like with daughters instead of 4 sons lol....... so Friday night saw this.........





Thats Jacobs arm, my Tom sitting and my Sam squatting.... Ben was out... he was as yet to be delighted with our new toy....

This in me kitchen...... amongst the skateboard clobber, the hockey sticks, the cats and even bloody Janet was having a butchers as to what was going on....... Im sure it would of been easier with girls...... ya know shopping and doing our nails and girlie talk..... YEAH BLOODY RIGHT......

This bike did come with a fairing, ya know like the sports bikes, but that was the first thing they took off for extra speed...... it took my Tom about an hour to suss out why it was not working, and all the electrics, its got proper lights and indicaters and a horn and even an alarm.......its well a bloody posh one :)........

So it saw Saturday afternoon before it could be tested out proper..... cos Tom and Ben was both at work and wouldnt be in til 1ish......... ITS FREAKIN BRILL....... it goes way fast........ ok well fast for such a tiny bike... it gets up to about 35-40 on the straight out the front of our house......... ok ok, well where else are they suppose to test it out..... :) - they are HIGHLY illegal out on the roads....... unless obviously they are taxed and insured....... but at 30 quid if push comes to shove and the coppers nick them and crush it, then they would of had a few weeks of fun and death defying rides out the front.........

They take it out for only about 15 minutes a time ;) then quickly put it round the back garden...... just incase someone bugger reports them lol

Well well well, me twat neigbbour came out on Tuesday when me lads was out the front...... its real quiet during the day out the front in our road....... but that tosser just happened to come out to see what was going on.........



This is how me conversation went with this bloke that is SO up his own arse he can polish his own spleen......

Him - oh my, isnt that one of those bikes Ive seen on the telly that the police are confiscating.......

Me - nah, I think you must be mistaken....

Him - no, Im pretty sure they are the same, they are illegal to ride on public roads you know.....especially without a crash helmet

Me - well, if it was illegal, do you really think I would be letting me lads ride it on the public road..... and there is a good reason why no crash helmet...

Him - Yes...

Me - Well I think you might be confused, because we ARE allowed to have this bike, its not what you think it is, its special....

Him - Yeah right....

Me - Can I have a quiet word with you away from me lads....

My Head was working overtime as to what to say to him lol

Him - Are you threatening me....

Me - Moi, nah, this is a serious matter....

Him - OK....

So I walk up the road a wee bit, out of earshot of me lads......

Me - look I didnt wanna say anything infront of me lads, cos it is a very sensitive subject....

Him - So its nicked is it?

Me - Good god no..... but there is something YOU need to know, but you must understand that this is very private and when I tell you, you will be the only person as yet around here that knows.......

Him - (real bloody gagging now for private information) Ok....

Me - Can you keep a secret....

Him - Not if its illegal or serious...

Me - Jebus, you are making this difficult.....please listen, this is hard for me to tell....

Him - Ok...

Me - I have bought this midi moto because we had some bad news about my Jacob.....

Him - oh my..... whats the matter..

Me - He has been diagnosed with being a midget.....

Him - (blank staring embarrassed) a midget? Jacob? (he doesnt know which kid is which lol) ....

Me - Yes, we had to register him officially as a midget, and as all the normal bikes are to big for him to ride, the DVLA (Driving Vehicle License Association) suggested that we buy a midi moto for him, to give him the same chance in life as all the other kids his age.......

Him - Oh my.... (open gobsmacked mouth) a midget? what a real midget?

Me - Yes, I know its a very sensitive subject, and we are just as a family, coming to terms with it..... and trying to treat him the same as all his friends..

Him - Not being insensitive here Mel, but I always thought he had short legs....but you should get him to wear a crash helmet...

Me - thats ok, just dont stare at him if you can possibly help it, he is finding this very difficult.... and cos of his big midget head, we cant find a helmet to fit...

Him - ok.... a midget right? so you have a giant son and a midget.... well I never....

Me - Sorry to have to put this to you, I hope you understand.....

Him - Yes, very sad, Im sorry...

Me - Thanks for your understanding...

Him - ok I have to go now...

Me - ok - but remember, midgets are real people to ya know..

Him - SLAMS HIS FRONT DOOR..

Me - Runs in doors to use the toilet before I piddle me pants.......

This is the gods honest truth of the conversation I had with me neighbour.....

Im giggling as I type this......



This is Jacob today about an hour ago....note the cycle helmet LOL safety ya see, its all about safety........

Just gotta trust their judgement on speed and how far they push........ and sometimes ya just gotta let boys be boys and deal with the circumstances as and if they happen.......

I have so many bike stories...... maybe another I will tell over the weekend......

Ok enuff Twaddle for any Friday...

x

Happy Birthday Tom - To Day I Honour Your Birth

Ok............. 22 years ago yesterday, I picked up my bag and was ready to go have me second child...... technically this was to be me third child but in reality he was to be my second live child..... my first child was born 2 1/2 months early and only weighed 3.2 lb..... she did not survive....... which is strange really, cos me brother was born 50 years ago, one of a twin(one twin died at 6 months in the womb - long story) and he weighed just over 2 1/2 lb all those years ago..... and that was without all the technology of today......... oh well, thats how the cards are dealt.......

Anyways, I was almost 2 weeks overdue with this child......... so I was booked in to get this child moving.......... 10 hours of normal stuff and then after 11.36 hours of 'I dont care if this child has 3 arms, 4 eyes, no ears, is as ugly as a camel - JUST GET IT OUT NOWWWWWWWWWWW' my Thomas was born this Day 11 April 1985 - he was born on my brothers 21 birthday......



Tom is a few hours old here and didnt look to bad by now, unless its just where I was getting use to his looks LOL

After all that labour we didnt even make it around to the delivery room, he shot out and almost shot right off the end of the bed LMFAO..... that is NO word of a lie, ya see, the midwives were just changing shifts (unbelieveable right) and was busy chatting and putting on their sexy latex gloves, they didnt think he would be so quick....LOL at quick, yeah right almost 22 hours and they call that quick, well they wasnt trying to push a rhino out of a buttonhole......I think where he was so big (not my biggest by far lol) maybe the pressure built up inside and he shot out like a bat out of hell...... me hubby at the time *spit* just made it in time, ya see he went home cos he was tired LMFAO...so I did the last 9 hours on me own...... omg just about says it all...... he was FUCKING TIRED....... lol - that really to me should of been the first sign...... oh well hindsight is a strange thing.......

Anyways, my first born son was the most gorgeous beautiful huge eyed baby when he was born.......... my Tom my second born LOL and yes he knows the story.... was 9 lb 3 oz when he was eventually born, he was the most unusual looking baby I had ever seen - he was bald as a coot well except for this gingerish sort of fluff, and had a huge bright red strawberry mark in the middle of his forehead with sort of piggie eyes........ I know every mother thinks their child is the most beautiful creation, BUT there comes a cut off point..... this baby was like some bloody alien lol........ I remember saying to the midwife just a few minutes after he was born........ jebus, is he really mine and she replied....... Im afraid so LMFAO and we both burst out laffing....... I said....... any chance of putting it back and letting it cook a little more......... jebus we laffed......... but I was serious lol............ this child was one ugly duckling.........

So, the following day, I wrap this little alien up and bring him home....... after picking us up and taking us home my now X hubby buggered back off to work....... yep, dropped us home, opened the front door and he put his boots on and was out the back door with, 'I'll pick up fish and chips after work shall I' LOL

This ugly duckling grew and changed.....he most certainly had a mind of his own...... and was growing what seemed like inches daily....... by the time my Tom was 2 he was the same size as his 4 year old brother, one dark haired and one as blonde as an angel.... people use to think they were unidentical twins.....



Being a tall kid had its disadvantages when young, people expected you to act ya size and not ya age........ oh well, their problem not ours......

My Ugly duckling was morphing into the most beautiful child.......



When Tom was 6 he had meningitis, it was the most scariest time of me life...... I thought I was gonna loose this child before he had grown, oh jebus please dont take another from me........ but he came home from hospital weak skinny but all intact........ he got meningitis again when he was 8, and was almost at deaths door yet again, the doctors couldnt believe how unlucky we were, for this child to get this terrible thing twice........ BUT again because I saw the first signs my child came away with no long term affects (my sister had flown home from Bali at this time with menigitis and they think the connection was there??????)...... many children are left blind or have brain damage or have to have limbs removed with this illness...and many die..... someone was shining down on us get again.........

My Tom over the years has broken his elbow so badly that the doctors didnt think he would ever have proper use of his arm..... which turned out to be bollocks....... his only defect from falling 20 out of a tree is that he can bend his elbow about 8 inches the wrong way LOL its a GREAT party trick......... it didnt stop him playing the violin and piano or learning the drums......or playing football and rugby and it certainly didnt stop him becoming one of the best Tchoukball players his school had ever had......



This was our start up drumkit....... seems funny looking back on that old little kit to what we have today.......

He has broken his foot whilst jumping over our back fence, he has broken so many fingers Ive lost count whilst playing Tchoukball...... he ripped his kneecap off his knee in a BMX accident and had emergency surgery......... as he has grown older has broken many a heart :)

Ive raised this child completely alone financially and emotionally since he was 14/15....... we have had many ups and down in those teenage years...... he at times was my cross to bare in life, somedays I didnt think I would ever get through them....... remember the caravan fire....... somedays, I could of walked away, somedays I so NEEDED someone else to care, someone to help me guide not only Tom but all 4 of me lads........ but it was just me....... I had to stick it out....... and my god........ what a beautiful wonderful special child my Tom has turned out to be........ he makes me laff, he makes me cry, he brings me tears of joy and sometimes even tears of heartache........

I gave my Tom the gift of college, his first year he did Art and Design, he is such a gifted artist, but realised that it would be difficult to find work in that field so he changed courses and did motor mechanics...... he didnt want to go to university, he wanted to get a job and earn money....... he works a 56 hour week, and never takes time off unless he is really poorly....... I am proud of my child..... one can only guide and nurture the rest is up to them......

.. he loves his brothers with a passion and I think he loves me..... the little things he does, tells me so....... I hope he knows that I would lay my life on the line for him without a second thought....



This was him last year on holiday in Greece, he turned 21 last year and it was his gift from me to him...... I thought you have to have something to keep for ya 21st...... what better to keep then wonderful memories of a holiday with ya girlfriend...... something to keep long after the engraved beer mug is broken, something to keep for a life time.......



This is the lastest picture of my Tom - late last night - its amazing what one can do with a pringle lid and a few quickly drawn lines lol

So Tom.......... from Ugly Duckling to the most beautiful young man that you have become....my 6' 4" tall man ... I honour this day, and I honour you with my very Soul........ I LOVE YOU SON......... xxxxxx

More then enough Twaddle for today.....

Portchester Castle......Yes, We Have Well Proper Castles.... III

Ok .......... another boring post, but I want to get this one down........

Friday saw us load the nippers up again and head for Portchester Castle, we LOVE Portchester castle, its free unless ya wanna go into the inner inner Bailey and thats often difficult when we have tots...... but the walk around the outside of the castle next to the water is lovely, and I promise to take any doodles there if ya one day visit..... and then ya go inside the gates to the inner Bailey and there's a moat and the most beautiful church and graveyard in one corner...... in the summer they have reinactments and stuff there... one of me maties got married in the church a long time ago, I remember it was well windy and her mums hat blew off and the limo ran it over lol it was just sooooooo funny.......

Its a place me sister and her boyfriend (later to be her first husband, whom I love with a passion today and he lives in the States) use to take me and me brother there when we was kids......... we go there now in the winter months and buy fish and chips from Mother Kellys and eat them out of the paper whilst braving the wind sitting on the old churchyard wall.......

So we took the nippers there on Friday, its only about 15 minutes drive up over Portsdown hill through the back lanes, me matie Ann who aint a local laffs cos I know all the back ways to places where as she would of driven the main road ways and it would of taken yonks....... stick with me girl I will show ya the world lol



First stop the ice-cream van LOL



This is what ya see from the little car park..



This one was from a few weeks ago......

Ya see, around these parts there is just so much heritage, so much to see, SO MUCH HISTORY....... I love old things, I love roots, but that dont mean it would take that much to dig me up and plant me somewhere else......I know the area and surrounding areas where I live like the back of me hand, I gobsmack me maties sometimes, we can just be walking along somewhere I I'll say something like 'did you know that in 1842 so and so this that or the other' or 'see that building there, did yo know that at the turn of the century blah blah blah' or I will walk around Chichester when we are crimbo shopping (amazing cathedral there) with me head to the sky, looking above the shop fronts (Chichester is well old) and I will say 'hey look at that gargoyle up there as a rain shoot' - me maties that I hang with aint into history or old things or chickens or country or views etc....... so they just nod at me and smile and say 'off she goes again' and we end up laffing.......... me and me maties are like chalk and cheese, but god do we laff...... very often at my expense I will add lol........ I let me kids explore and push themselves and climb walls and trees and try to jump moats etc...... they think Im mad, when Tom once when he was younger fell out of a tree and smashed his elbow beyond reconition they said maybe he shouldnt of been 20 foot up a tree on a rainy day LOL......

I broke me collar bone once as a kid, was playing down the dumps with me brother and his friends, we was playing war I was as high as a house up in the old oak, and someone shot me with an air rifle LOL it plum made me jump out of me skin and hence I fell as high as a house out of the tree, it sure knocked the wind out of me, lucky it was just me collarbone I broke, but I was to scared to go home so I didnt tell for 3 days until they picked it up at school lol........ boy was I in the shit at home, not for not telling, but for going down the dumps when I was not suppose to be down there...... so with me arm in a sling I still got a beating of me life, had to take the rest of the week off school and had to say cos me collar was hurting but its cos I was covered in bruises lol...... but it was worth it.... I had flown like a bird that day, even though it was straight down to hit the ground LOL







Anyways, whilst we was in the castle grounds my Jacob ALWAYS climbs the walls always, he HAS to do it, even though all the signs say NO CLIMBING THE WALLS lol, its something that must be in his blood, cos thats what I use to do there, he loves being up high, just like me....... I should of been a bird ya know lol



This is Jacob sitting above the DO NOT CLIMB SIGN lol....... luckily the blokie was not around to shout at him and tell him off, he was gutted that me matie wouldnt let her girl (Jacobs best friend) climb the walls, in case she fell, yeah well if they fall ya deal with that then :) life is about pushing oneself..... anyways the moat was there to catch them lol it would of made a hell of a splash...... lol



ya can see how The Castle sits on the waters edge.......

I dont usually lick and stick but this is what is written about Portchester Castle.....

*Portchester Castle’s commanding location has made it a major factor in the Solent’s defences for hundreds of years.

The most impressive and best preserved of the Roman ‘Saxon Shore’ forts, Portchester was originally built in the late 3rd century. It is the only Roman stronghold in northern Europe whose walls still mainly stand to their full height. Subsequently housing a Saxon settlement, the huge waterside fortress became a Norman castle in the 12th century, when a formidable tower-keep was built in one corner.

Portchester was in the front line throughout the Hundred Years War, serving as a stagingpost for expeditions to France and repelling cross-Channel raids. Richard II transformed part of the castle into a palace in 1396 and Henry V used it as a departure point for the Agincourt campaign in 1415. Thereafter it saw little action, but was used to house troops in the Civil War, and prisoners of war during the Dutch and Napoleonic Wars*

Ya can see why I LOVE IT and so wanna share it with ya all one day.......

Only 2 nippers fell in the moat on Friday and one got stuck out the back in the sea, well the mud cos the tide had gone out lol..... only lost one shoe in the mud, so all was good.....

We taught the kids how to make daisy chains and just enjoy doing simple things without computer games and spending money, we taught them how to try and fly a kite with no wind..... we taught them that being with each other and running around free and getting wet and muddy and stickie with ice-creams is what being a kid is about.......



This is Sprite, I have her and her brother 9 hours a day, Ive had her since she was 6 weeks old and have had her brother since he was 18 months old...... they are a part of my family, her brother has slight special needs and has the most difficult to understand speach impediment, but he has come on leaps and bounds with me, I talk to him NON Stop........ they love me with a passion as does their mum and dad, and I love and would die for them both as I would me own lads.....

She is called Sprite cos she looks like the little sprite gremlin thats on one of our Fizzy drinks adverts on the telly, EVERYONE now calls her Sprite :) even her mum and dad LMFAO........

Sorry Im was Twaddling and Waffling boring old rubbish today, like a loon, dont know what thats about lol

x

Southsea Seafront.... I Was Born in Southsea.....II

Ok........... ya see, during the school breaks, of which we are on a fortnights break for end of term here, I aint the sort of person to stay in........ ya see, during the normal school term we dont really get a chance to go out for the whole day cos there is school drop offs and then pre-school drop offs and then lunchtime pick ups and then 2.45 pick ups from pre-school and 3.30 pick ups from school and then shot over to pick Jacob up and then often as not to then pick Sam up from College.......

Sooooooooooo during the school breaks its nice to GET OUT and do stuff with the nippers........ each day is different nippers, each school break can also be different..... with nippers from babies right up to 12 year olds.....

Anyways you will hardly ever find me home during school holidays, I pack up the car with buggys and lunches and picnic blankets and kites and footballs and everything but the kitchen sink and we just bugger off out..... no matter what the weather...... either down the seafront cos ya can walk for miles along the prom, or to the woods, we are surround by woods here, NOT forests, just woods, well famous 'Forest of Bere' thats where many of the Royals Oaks were cut down and used to build ships like The Mary Rose, thats Henry VIII ship that sank in our harbour entrance all those years ago and was lifted in 1982 - but thats maybe another story......

LOL, I was just gonna ramble on then about my love of our heritage in my neck of the woods and me passion for our local history..... but again, maybe another time....

So, I loads the nippers up drives round to me maties, she loads hers up and we head for Southsea..... the water that afronts Southsea seafront is called The Solent, its a strip of water that has one of the busiest shipping lanes in the world, apparently...... with the Dockyard up one end and the habour mouth is also one of the narrowest :)...... all the naval shipping goes up The Solent, all the huge International Ferries, also the hovercraft that goes across to the Isle of Wight...... ya see this strip of water is what seperates us from The Isle of Wight, its a little Island just off our south coast..... and ya can just jump on the Ferry or the hovercraft to get there........ and in the middle of The Solent are 3 seaforts........ built to defend Portsmouth from invasion, The Round Tower and Hot Walls at Portsmouth are well old and all part of the fortification of the town, anyways I could go on and on and on about my part of the world....... but I do know that when I get me doodle maties over for a visit, we will take the little boat out to the seafort that has a resturant on it and just do soooooooo much to do with my world............ ok sorry rambling....... Im in a strange frame of mind this morning.....

If you look behind the nippers in this picture you will be able to just make out one of the seaforts out in The Solent and in the distance you can see The Isle of Wight, its only about a mile across the water........ and I bought ya all a stick of Southsea Rock (Oh how British) and a postcard...... so if ya want them ya will have to tip me ya address'....... well except those in our Gumbyland.......



This picture was taken out on the old pier, it partly burnt down when they was filming scenes for The Who's Film Tommy back when I was 14ish........did you know I was an extra in that film :).......nah I dont suppose ya did.....

Anyways it was WELL windy down the seafront, so we walked right along until we ended up behind Southsea Castle where is was real sheltered and so very hot lol.......



As you can see maybe it was not hot enough for ice-creams lol.......

Only 2 nippers fell into the sea on Wednesday....... so that was good........ it was strange not having all me other nippers with me, the older ones do make it so much more fun.........

anyways just boring Twaddle today....

OH, BUT OMG WE BOUGHT THE MOST FUN THING YESTERDAY........ ok ok so someone might end up getting killed on it, but its so much fun...... another time for that though......

x

First Week Of Our Easter Fortnight........I

Ok...........so we have just come to the end of our first week of our Easter holidays..... our schools are off for a fortnight, I always have to work the first week but have the second week off :) - this second week I should of been flying to the states, with it being spring, but alas, it didnt turn out as planned, oh well - well I have the week off from minding but obviously NOT off from my from mob....and all their mates and their bands will be here and girlfriends, so not the break I really had in mind, sigh.... I aint felt 100% kosher this week but Ive muddled through.......

Many of me nippers I dont have cos I mainly mind for school teachers :) and of course they get the time off school hence I dont have their kids, but I still get paid...... also one of me maties is in Florida so some days Ive had some of her minded mob :)

Anyways this is gonna be a boring post today, just Twaddle about everyday stuff here....... no funny stories to tell, just life really........ and Im knackered this weekend, so Im glad that next week I do not have to wake by an alarm :)

So......... Monday saw me at Petersfield lake........ being School holidays it was well busy by lunchtime, so Im glad he went early, there is a play area there which if truth be known I dont actually like....... that to me is not what taking ya nippers to the lake is all about, if ya wanted to just go play on play equipment ya might as well just go to the local park......... the nippers were a tad disappointed that we frogmarched them away from the equipment and off for a walk around the lake........

I suppose one funny thing did happen actually....... I was in me car and me matie was in front in her car when we are queuing at the roundabout up in town, on the way to Petersfield, the traffic was real busy and moving slow cos of road works on the roundabout....... you have to realise that me and me matie are a couple of loons when together........ so we are queuing when Jacob opens a packet of chocolate crisps....... they are the same size as pringles but just made of chocolate with bits of orange in....... hehehehe - the windows of the cars were all open cos it was well hot....... so I bibbed ann with me horn and jacob held up the chocolate crisps and he was laffing........ cos I knew Ann didnt have any in her car....... well with that she stops dead in the car while the traffic moves off and opens her car door and walks back to my car and reaches through the window of me car and snatches the box off of Jacob and turns to me and just says BITCH lol - all the traffic was at a stand still and horns were going off everywhere LMFAO.......... it was just soooooo funny, so I get out me car and walk up to hers and snatch them back, I suppose you had to be there.... 2 cars behind us was a cop car, which I didnt see until I was walking back to my car, the 2 coppers were in there just shaking their heads and laffing lol



Sprite - Jacob - Its Jon - Flapper - Just Jack - Smidge - Smudge - Aimie - Pod

As you can see by the rosie cheeks and the unsmiling faces, we had knackered them out around the lake ......

So here we have a few of my crew with my Jacob in the beige hoody and me maties girl Aimie sitting next to him in blue with the scarf - they have been best friends since they was about 4, they are both 13 now.... both Jacob and Aimie are great with the nippers, they know they reap the benefits, and to be honest, since Ive had these nippers since they were all babies they are just like brothers and sisters.... :)

After our long walk around the lake we relented and let the kids have 30 minutes in the play park.....

ok which of these kids do you think ended up in the lake up to their knees in duck sludge?

Which one of these darlings do you think wandered off of the picnic blanket and climbed the 9 foot slide on their own, and when Ann said to me wheres just jack I said casually, oh up the top of the slide, with which we both leapt up and ran. hobbled to save him lmfao...... cos of me dodgy knee I made Ann climb up the actual slide to rescue just jack LMFAO it was just so funny..... I almost wet meself laffing......

Which one of these kids climbed one of the trees and got stuck up the top for 20 minutes cos I refused to climb up and help them down?

Which one of these kids, poo'd their nappy so much that it shot out the top of its nappy and all over its clothes without a change of clothes with me?

Which one of these kids threw its ice-cream at one of the others and hit them on the head with it (great shot) cos they called them a not nice name?

Which one of these kids did I pick up and put on the top of me car and in through the sunroof (which was luckily open) cos I had locked me keys in?

So you see........ our days out NEVER go smoothly lol...... but I wouldnt have them any other way :)

Boring Twaddle today - sorry feeling tired....

I Spy With My Little Eye Something Beginning With PT......

ok........... Fanks to Jade we might of cracked the uploading of photos cock-up

Soooooooo, yesterday, I spent the best part of the day at Portchester Castle, will blob about that maybe sundee or sometime........ but it was a hot day, hot by our british weather standards, and I still had loads of nippers even though I cancelled 3 to lighten the load cos I aint been feeling 100% kosher........ anyways....... I was knackered when I got in...... I must be getting old, but jebus did I laff yesterday with me matie Ann......

Anyways....... so when me minded nippers had all gone home I thought I well fancy some ice-cream........ we usually make our own but always have 'standby' stuff in the freezer from the shops......... well, my lads can eat it by the bucket load, so I buys the cheap stuff plus the well nice proper stuff and they have to mix and match :)........ I meself prefer ice lollies but yesterday I had not made any......... so I goes to the freezer to treat meself to a bowl of ice-cream and I am confronted by THIS ................



I spy with my little eye something beginning with.... PT.......... go on have a right proper look and see if you can guess....


Give up? ya need a clue? look to the left hand side of the picture and see what is sticking out of the white paper bag.......... CAN YOU SEE IT........

PT = Pink Tail......... yes a bloody Pink Tail - ok ok, so I knows that Erics dead frozen white mice are kept frozen in the freezer BUT they are suppose to be wrapped up and out of sight, shoved at the back somewhere or in the bottom draw next to the ice lollies........

Ok it almost put me off me ice-cream, but I gulped the thought of dead mice in me freezer down and thought, well Eric has to eat ya know....... so I finks I'll sort the PT out after the treat and I'll wrap it up in the bag and shove it in the bottom, I thought all the dead mice had run out........so I was a bit baffled....

So - I asks my Jacob if he fancies some of the nice ice-cream before the other greedy gannets get home.... ok he says, so I grabs two bowls and 2 spoons, its just me and jacob in the house, ICE-CREAM TIME after a long hard day WoooooooHooooooo - I was SO ready for this......... I go back to the freezer to get the Tub of Ice-cream out and THIS IS WHAT I FIND........



OMG - Oh My Bloody God................. What TF...... Who TF......... Jebus Mary Muvver of Whoever........... Either that is a very LUMPY tub of ice-cream OR someone SAM has put the dead mice in the ice-cream tub..........

SO THEY THINK THATS FUNNY DO THEY................. they think thats bloody funny............ so I was suppose to open that on 1 April - April Fools Day........ THIS MEANS WAR......... bloody War......... I will await my time and then GOD HELP MY SAM :)

Twaddle over and out for today .......

x