Tuesday, 26 June 2007

I Sometimes Wonder What..............

Ok.......... This is probably me most favourite photo that I have in my possession......Thats my Jacob on the left when he was 4 and thats me mad matie Moira's girl Bebhinn (pronounced Bevin its irish).......they were born only 2 weeks apart....

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I love this photo so very very much......

I sometimes wonder what it would be like to be looked at with such love......I think, I would hope, that I give out love to special people in me life by the bucket load, and its not given lightly....what I mean by that is when I say those words 'I love you' to whomever, it truely, purely, honestly means that I do..... and with those words comes the undeniable fact that I would just about do anything for the person that I give those words to.......

BUT......... I have NEVER in me whole long life, ever been looked at like Bebhinn is looking at my Jacob...... not with pure love, not with honest deep love...... maybe I never will...... who knows.......

So, what bought this all on...... well, ya see, my brain has so many memories stored about in files..... me brain is like a photo album stuffed full of me life and every single thing that has ever happened..... but like a bookcase full of books sometimes I need a 'jog' to remember things and what shelf they are stored on...... a word over heard can flash up memories from me head and lay them out before me on the table, things that seems as if only yesterday that memory was stored on the 2nd shelf....

So it was strange today, or this past few days, PTs funny posts about Marmitetoasty and love and then someone at school this afternoon called out to someone and I overheard the name Moira.... well its not a common name here, this aint Ireland ya know..... and I had this big whoooosh of memory, good memory, sad tearful memory, a memory as clear and crisp as fresh lettuce...... a memory of me dear matie mad Moira... so I came home and had to hunt for a few photos to go with those memories......

So thanks PT cos I think the things we have talked about and the memory jog today are connected....... ya see, love comes in many forms....... love from and of ones children, love of ones specal maties and hopefully love oneday of someone that will look at me the same way that Bebhinn is looking at my Jacob...... ya see...... one day me prince will come.......LOL

Anyways........ Bebhinn is the daughter of me matie mad Moira, the story of me matie is way to complex and complicated to post about...... suffice to say, we didnt know each other until our second children were born...... she has 4 kids almost the same ages as my boys..... except I have 4 boys and she has 3 boys and 1 girl..... our gardens use to back onto each other, the 4 children were like one, if they was not all at my house then they would all be at mad Moira's...... Ive never had a mad friend before...... I mean a real mad as in mental friend, as in she was diagnosed with some manic mental thing from when she was 12........ but in many ways it didnt affect her life UNTIL...... her hubby walked out and left her with her 4 kids about 6 months before my hubby walked out and left me with 4 kids LOL...... maybe it was a trend...... maybe it was the fashion of the time....... it was weird cos mad moira was married on the same day and the same year and at the same time as me and my X hubby..... except she was in London and I was here in this village....... we were still 4 or 5 years within meeting each other...... maybe it was fate, maybe it was a sign at just how strong and close and wonderful our friendship was to become......

Me matie was an amazing Art Teacher, but when she was left she completely lost the plot of life and all the wonders it still had in its hands for her........ she became lost in a world that I so couldnt understand, all I could do was to be there for her....... as I will be forever......

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This day was so funny, Bebhinn and Jacob had got into Moira's shed and the tins of paint and they came to show me what they had been up to LMFAO...... I remember saying to Moira...... just tell me it aint gloss paint, please tell me its just emulsion lol...... I love this photo...... love it.....

Ya see....... I myself was struggling with the emotions and financial problems of 4 children and being dumped on the shitpile of life called single parenthood...... and when me matie Moira lost the plot of life by becoming a big drug taker to try and take away the pain........ she sold her house, the only stable bit of life her 4 kids had, and they were to be taken into care by the social services...... I asked her what she wanted to do.... what SHE wanted for herself to do........ she said she just needed time on her own....... time to sort out her life...... time to get to grips with everything over the years of madness........ she said she didnt want the children........ she couldnt cope....... she didnt wanna cope....... she said she wasnt me..... she couldnt bounce high enough......

There is no way in hells water that I would let these children, that were in fact just an extention of my family go into care....... so, we packed their clothes and bits and bobs and they all moved in with me and my 4 sons....... after all..... they was all like brothes and sister anyways, there had been inseperatable for years...... they were as one........ and 8 kids is just like having 4 kids, right? LOL

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This was one spring day in me garden..... the feeding of the 5 thousand lol..... the friend on the far left that had come round for lunch didnt know what had hit him as these 8 children acted as one LOL.......

So, within 6 months of me trying to cope with my own rejection, I took on these 4 beautiful wonderful children that had always seemed a part of me life...... there is no way I would of let them go into care, not whilst there was breath in me body.......

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You can see how close the children all were, people use to think I had 8 kids lol...... which bit of '4 of the kids were of a slightly darker colour' didnt they see lol....ya see, their father was anglo-indian......and Moira's kids had the most beautiful olive skin.... which got ligher with each child....we use to joke and say that her hubbys ink must of been running out by the 4th child LOL....... my Ben is missing from this picture cos he was on a school trip......

So....... me matie moved into a little flat overlooking the Itchen Toll Bridge as she struggled with her addiction and her mental illness...... and she would come and stay some weekends and I would go there and stay some weekends......

One night, I think it was the last night that I ever got truely rat-arsed...... remember now, I was raising 8 kids under the age of 16 on me own emotionally and financially...... ok so I deserved a drink lol...... well we got so rat-arsed that we decided that we could easily walk along the parapit of the Itchen Toll Bridge at Southampton, 30 foot above the raging river lol....... how we didnt die that night I will NEVER know, one slip and we would of plunged into the depths of the river lol..... that night we laffed and cried and laffed and remembered so very much fun and laughter we use to have with the kids....... and it was, I thought a turning point for me matie........

She bought a house in Southampton and realised that selling her home here in the village was a mistake, but she was ready to start afresh....... there is NOTHING I wouldnt of done for me matie and her children and there was NOTHING that she wouldnt of done for us.......

She then met a blokie and buggered off to Australia for 18 months taking the children with her....... it was to be the loneliest period of me life.... but I was so happy for her and the kids...... there was so many tears at the airport when I waved goodbye to them all....... and so many hugs and tears when 18 months later they came home......

But within a year, her depression had come back and she again lost the plot of life, she didnt wanna be a mum no more, she said dads just up and leave why cant mums just up and leave........ and that is what she did........ she packed her kids up and turned up at her X's house (whom had remarried and had a tiny little house with this woman and her 2 kids and a child they had between them) and she dropped the kids off at their fathers and said she was off to Australia to start on her own........not with the boyfriend.....she said I was mad for wanting to stick with a life of struggle and kid raising........ oh how wrong she was on that one.......

She said, she was not like me, she couldnt be what her kids needed, she didnt wanna be the one to struggle and cope and explain and couldnt cope with the pain....... and she upped and left...... without a backwards glance......

UNTIL last year, when I got home from the school run, she was sitting in me kitchen with a sarnie and a cuppa tea....... just as if 2 years had faded away....... and it was just as if it was the week before that I had seen her....... that is how close and special our deep true friendship was...... she knew, that I would ALWAYS be there for her, no matter how many years slipped away...... no matter if I hadnt heard from her for over 2 years...... no matter what.......

She stayed just over a week, the kids all came over and it was like old times only the kids were all so much older and bigger etc....... we laffed and cried and laffed and laffed......... and then I got up one morning and she was gone...... just a little note.......

I LOVE you Mel...... fanks for being you.......

I dont know if I will ever see me matie again...... I dont even know if she is alive..... or where she is living....... but I do know, that when she needs a friend, or a hand, or someone that understands..... she will turn up and be sitting in me kitchen with a sarnie and a cuppa tea when I come in from the school run......

That is a lifetime friendship........ I hope she is safe, I hope she is alive, I hope that oneday she finds what she needs from life, and I hope that oneday I can be apart of that madness again LOL.....

I miss me matie mad Moira....... and her kids...... she was not the only one robbed that day when she walked out of everyones lives......

Now, I DONT want you lot to think that Im a softie or whatever....... cos I aint...... and I have a 'well ard' reputation to uphold....... so keep all this under ya belt, ok?

Enough memory Twaddle for a wet Tuesday.......

x

48 comments:

Pixie said...

That is a sad and wonderful story.

And of course it's as well you're 'so hard' so that you were there for all of them as and when!!

Wouldn't believe anything less than you being tough as old boots, except when love is invloved.
px

The Fool said...

You're a golden person to have as a mother, friend, or matie, Mel. Your love shines through your posts, and you stand as a model for others to follow. Keep being you...there's no way that such humanity can go unnoticed by What-the-fuck-ever. "The look" you long for has got to be out there in the wings...stay open and believe. You carry that person in you already, and they you...may your paths cross and allow you both to become complete. Best to you, friend.

And the knot of the day is "monkey-fist." It's a beaut.

Later, M-Toasty.

Jen said...

What a great friend you are to Moira. And what a good example of friendship to your boys.

Dr.John said...

What a wonderful story. You once had eight kids. Wow. I hope someday you do see her again.

JBelle said...

People come in and go out of our lives. It's hard to completely understand, isn't it? I know she thinks of you--her kids think of you often--with great fondness and longing. She does the best she can do, as do we all. I have a feeling she's okay. And you are more than okay, Mellers, you are FAR OUT. Such a balance you have in the cosmic depository. :) Such a balance...

Ol' Lady said...

you are a true friend...I so understand Moira on many levels...I'm sure she is somewhere thinking of you...
bein mad is hard at times...

Bugwit said...

"Well 'ard' woman that takes in all straglers - even half-chewed mice.

I don't know how you ever got that reputation - well, beating up on TV announcers, but that's just common sense. ;-)

'ard 'eart, coz it's made 'o gold.

(((Marms)))

Lynn said...

I hope your friend is okay, too, Mel. Poor thing. If she ever turns up and the two of you can have a chance to have a bare-bones kind of chat again... well, you just never know. Maybe she'll turn up at a time when something could change. I think you are a wonderful friend though, because I'm sure Moira knows that you love her and would not demand that she be different than what she is able to be at any given time.

Catch said...

Marmie...you are the dearest person! Those children needed you so much and you were like a beacon in the night for them. God bless you Marmie...you are a great friend..I hope you and her see each other again...Im sure those children will never forget you, we need more people in this world just like you !!!!

Catch said...

oooops...forgot to tell you.... you got an award at my place on 6/25....come pick it up!

MarmiteToasty said...

Can I just say...... there is so much more that I could of written, so very funny and happy and side aching times with Moira, and some near death sad heartbreaking times with Moira.....I would need to write a book to include the friendship we shared for over 14 years... so many memories came flooding back when I was typing this Twaddle......

~(((pixie)))~ yep, tough as old doc marten boots, thats me lol.... but ya scratch me surface and Im as soft as toffe :)......xxx

~((((((foolie)))))))~ oh hush will ya, gawds sake, and its not the be all and end all of life to be looked at with pure love....... it would just be nice to experience it once before I die lol...... just like it would be nice to do a bungee jump or a hot air balloon ride :).... and me, well I open a little more each month..... fanks matie for your kind words.... now stop lol.......xxxxxxxx

~(((((jen))))))~ well, I would like to think I make a good matie, I'll ask me other maties today...

Ya know, the maties that spent all day yesterday talking in whispers and doing sign language at me cos they know me hearing has gone dodgy with ends of this cold..... bloody maties :).....xxx

~(((dr.john)))~ :) well only 4 of the kids were actually mine :)..... but I would of dearly loved to of had 7 or 8 kids of me own.....xxx

~(((JBelle))))~ I do know if she is alive then she will turn up again one day....... we all spent the most amazing summer one year at her mum and dads Enid Blyton house in Devon that is perched on the cliffs.... those memories will also last a lifetime, such fun times.....

having to google 'cosmic depository' cos it sounds like a clearing out of ones bowels LOL.....

I was probably the only person that didnt judge her on what she did..... ya, see, she deep down knew she couldnt cope with raising her kids alone, so she did what she thought best, so how can anyone judge her for that.....but they all know that my door is always open to them, always.... xxxxxxx

~(((ol' lady)))~ yep being mad at times can be 'different' believe me :) most think Im mad.....

I need to say something...... the word 'mad' as in 'mad Moira' aint a slant on her mental health, its a pure term of endearment... cos she was well funny and crazy.... so please, I hope no one thought I was being disrespectful, cos I wasnt.....

I love having mad maties.... cos we are all a little crazy at times, only I aint been properly labeled as yet LOL.......xxxxxx

~((((Bugs))))~not really straglers.... just those that need an outstretched hand :)....

Dont get me wrong..... anyone mess with me, me lads or me maties and one will see a side of me that would turn ya pubes grey and fall out LOL :).......xxx

~((((Lynn))))~ If she is alive, I know that she will be ok, she knows without all the responsibilities of life that she stables out and lives on a level plain.....its just some cope with shit a bit better then others, it doesnt make anyone less important :)....... shit, she is probably have a bloody whale of a time, LOL she did ask me to go with her, she begged me to drop me lads off at their fathers and bugger off for a life for me..... thats the only bit she didnt understand........ raising my lads WAS/IS the life for me..... its where I want and need to be - does that make sense?.......xxxxxx

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((catch)))~ bitch lol, ya snuck in whilst I was typing..... :) - ok bitch said to a matie is a term of endearment here LOL..... phew, getting out of that one :)...... well, I can only be me, warts and all.... people know not to shit on me and I will be ya matie for life..... :) well for a bag of donuts and a tin of fizzy lol.....

I popped over last night and was very moved, as I was with queenies award :)....... I'll suss and sort over the next couple of days.... I feel honoured, especially as Im so new at this blobbing malarkie LOL.........xxxxxxx

Mom not Mum said...

It is a wonderful and rare thing to have friends like that. Friends that you know if the world was crumbling around you they would be there to help pick up the pieces - or to just throw the rocks around.

Queenie said...

Ok you hard bitch,(don't make me laugh), there is an apology for Janet on my blog.
I love mad and eccentric friends, maybe cos I'm slightly mad and eccentric, who else would put duck when they wanted to say chicken.
Well enough folks have taken the wee-wee out of me, so I hope she has forgiven me?

Akelamalu said...

You know the true meaning of friendship, because you are a true friend.

cookieboy said...

mel - boy, you are a beautiful person (don't worry, i won't tell and ruin your rep lol) and you have such a WONDERFUL way with words. The person you are shines out of everything that you write...I'm proud you led me to your blog - I enjoy reading every story! The "gloomies" were NEVER gloomy when you were in there!

(((((((mel))))))) xoxoxo
love ya cutie!

gazey said...

(((( Mel ))))
I have not been able to post here for some time now....I hope this works...anyway, I love you!! what a dear and special friend you are to so many.... we are all blessed, just by knowing you.
Love,
Patti


* p.s....can I still be your kid? *
lol

gazey said...

oh my!!!!

...wiping crumbs from my chin.... ((((cookieboy )))))

nice 2 c u here, my sweet friend
:-)

buffalodickdy said...

You have a heart of gold. We all seem to have one friend that society would brand a failure. We know they are failing, but believe with a little help, time, and disapline they will get better. Darn few ever do.

Melody Ann said...

Mel mel mel. love ya blob- love the way kids can fall in love with each other so innocently and perfectly- love the way old friends are always old friends.

Hope I have someone like you I can turn to if I ever need a surrogate mother, friend or therapist!

toadman said...

Mel, I always get to your blob in the mornings (my time, that is..), and there's usually so many other comments that express the sentiments I would like to express about your posts, that I just sit back and enjoy it all...this post is no exception.

You are an amazing lady. Keep it up.

the psycho therapist said...

I am late once more but I am here.

she completely lost the plot of life and all the wonders it still had in its hands for her

Just. fucking. perfect.

Marmy, we both know everything is connected and all that happens is a result of this. We both have the ability to understand ("see", think "signs"). This post has me by the throat and will not let go. Yes, the happenings of these past few days have been *right on schedule*...when are they not, really...and I trusted you would "learn" and would be "shown" that which was "ready".

Heart to heart, matie.

(exhale)


--

Lynda said...

I always think of you as hard on the outside, but soft and chewy in the center. ;)

That's a wonderful story. It probably is good Moira wasn't just like you. You may not have gotten along so well. :D

MarmiteToasty said...

CRIPES - Where ave you lot come from whilst Ive been busy..... jebus.... I honestly didnt think anyone would comment on this one LMFAO.......

~(((momNmum)))~ I would like to think I make a good compassionate unjudgemental matie..... :) - just dont shit on me and all will be fine LOL........xxxx

~((((queenie))~ lol@hard bitch.... fank you for restoring me reputation lol - I aint had a proper chance to get over to you today..... but I will, and I had a word with janet not 3 minutes ago, before I snuggled her into her hay bed.... she said, she will think on it LMFAO.....xxxxxx

~(((ake)))~ fank you :).... I would like to think I was.... I will have to ask me maties in the morning the same question lol.....xxxx

~(((((cookieboy)))))~ oh you smush you, you with ya softie words LOL...and I am sooooo glad you came to me blob :) - maybe I will pop into the gloomies just to annoy ya LMFAO... fanks matie for your kind words..... now stop LOL....MMmm ya said 'love ya cutie' lol that means you will do anything for me cos it works both way :).....xxxxxx

~(((((((((Gazey)))))))))~ I had just booked me flight to come and hunt you down..... gawds sake :).... and I hope you know that I love you :) - and hush with the blessed..... Im just a rough ole bird :)......xxxxxxx and oye... no waving at the commenters lol

~(((buffalodickdy)))~ well dont know about gold - Im just me...... and yep, we hope and wish that a 'different' matie finds peace at least.... sometimes, that to, is just to much to wish for......xxx

~(((melody ann)))~ still find that funny to type me own name LMFAO....:) a surrogate mum aye? just dont ask for all those years of pocket money LOL.... a friend, yes.... a therapist, I DONT think so...... they be clever special people.......xxxxxx

~(((Toadie)))~ I only put this up late last night lol and was surprised this morning to find any posts....... :) - I never ever know what I will blob about, until I sit at the keyboard....... and not amazing, please, I so aint, Toadie, Im just me, full of twaddle that waffles on way to long lol.......xxxxxxxx

~(((((((((((((Wendy)))))))))))~ you are NEVER to late.... again I only put this up late last night.....

I do not know where that little snippet came from, it just flowed off me fingers.....

*This post has me by the throat and will not let go* - explain, is this bad????

Im scared ya know.....all this connection thing, grabs one by the short and curlies and it clings on..... and it begins to breathe and take life....... maybe I need to carry me a gun :)....xxxxxxxxxx

~(((Lynda)))~ yep thats me :) soft and chewy in the centre LOL....... oh me and mad moira had many a run in.... but maties can do that :)......xxxxxxx

Bugwit said...

Hm...I must have run afoul of you somewhere previously...
I was wondering what had happened to me.

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((Bugs))))~ ok, I know Im tired and still have 9 hours working day ahead, but, I have no idea what your little comment means?...... so..... bloody well explain will ya....... gawds sake....

x

The Woman said...

Now that is friendship! :o)

I guess I admire her courage to admit that she didn't or couldn't be a full time mom. I imagine it would have been more confusing to the kids to try to stay with her...

OrdinaryShark said...

It is wonderful that you are her rock and her net.

Jump to the Left said...

"...lost the plot of life..."

I love the way you said that, how you expressed such complicated, textured thoughts and emotions. Life. Love. I love the way your sharing of all this reflects that which is you, much like that lovely body of water in pixie's photo might.

Your perspective is beautiful.

xo

fatty said...

i have a moira.. mine is jojo.
it's an indescribable relationship isn't it..
and it's so very rare..

beautiful memories mel..

eddie said...

My friend you are truely a blessed person, the life's you have touched will always be so much more than they were, wished i lived over there so that i could get to know you, thanks...

the psycho therapist said...

Marmy,
It's not you, I keep telling you, it's not you.


---

InlandEmpireGirl said...

I agree with the comment you made. I think she will show up again. Each of us needs a friend that loves us unconditionally. You are that friend to her. She will always carry that with her.

jolie-jordan said...

You are a softie and I bet your "Mad" friends and her family will always be glad they have you. I for one think that if everyone coud open their hearts for others the world would be without all the wars and we'd all have more joy. Thanks for doing what you do to make this world a better place. You are a wonderful example for ua all.
xxxJolie

Sally Lomax said...

What an amazing story. Do you ever see the kids now?

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((the woman))))~ yeah, to be honest, she did what was best for the kids, their father was/is not a bad man, he is actually a good dad in many ways..... he is a deputy head of a school and was lumped with 7 kids to raise lol that will learn him for shagging someone else whilst still married LOL.....xxxxx

~((((((((Sharkie)))))))))~ short and sweet LOL...... and this aint no seaside ya know, so whats with the rocks and net ;)....xxxxxx

~(((((jumper)))))))~ gulp.... goodness..... ya know, I dont know how to write proper, I dont do all the posh posts..... I can only be me, and write whats inside me head.. and be the person I am..... fank you.....*choking up with your comment...xxxxxxxx

~((((((fatty))))))~ then love to your jojo.....yeah, and Im sure somewhere along the line, there will be more memories....even though sometimes I knew I carried the weight and all her problems and she often just sat back and let me take it all on..... Im still here if she ever turns up again.....

Actually, that day, when she was sitting in me kitchen, having made herself a sarnie from me fridge and a cuppa tea..... the first thing she said after 2 years was..... I'll bung the kettle back on shall I :)........xxxx

~(((((((eddie))))))))~ blessed be the pure in heart :) LMFAO ok that even made me laff cos I dont do god, so where the fuck did I drag that up from?....... eddie, I wish you lived here to, then you could mend our bloody mini moto that no one can seem to fathom out..... fank you ;).........xxxx

~(((((((((((Wendy))))))))))))~ I know, I do know, I think anyways.......xxxxxxxxxxxx

~(((((InlandEmpireGirl)))))~ :) yeah she usually turns up when she wants something LMFAO......but I know what you mean....xxxxx

~(((jolie-jordan))))~ now listen ear :), Im 'well ard' and dont let anyone convince you otherwise LOL..... Im tough though, Ive had to be, and people know where I stand here irl, and they also know NOT to shit on me, or else...ya see, I bid me time and then when a shithead least expects it.... then BAM..... LOL.. but your right... a little bit of understanding wouldnt go amiss with some people...... and oh hush with your other kind words..... *putting on a well tough face' lol......xxxx

~(((sally lomax)))~ welcome to the serious hour :)..... in answer to your question.... I see Aiden and Connor sometimes when Im over the way where they live, and my Ben and Tom see them out clubbing in town, and they always talk about old stuff.... I think maybe its a comfort for them..... I saw Ewen about 12 months ago but aint seen Bebhinn since mad Moira was here..... but they all know my door is and will always be open to them all.......

And, hey, scroll back and read some of the other stuff, me posts aint all deep and serious ya know :)......xxxxxx

Jennifer said...

Now, in my humble opinion, every single one of those kids look at you like Moira's girl was looking at your son! I know its not the same and I know you're going to hate for me saying this BUT YOU ARE MUSHY!!! LOL
You got more love in one pinky than I got in my whole body, whether its mushy or not!

Kati said...

Gosh. What wonderful pictures of all your kids. And I too think that the first pic is just fabulous, the way Bebhinn is looking at your son.

You are such a special person to take in an additional 4 children, no matter how close, without balking at how hard it would be. I'm sure those children will always remember how you love them as though they were yours, and I'll bet that they will look you up, sooner or later, to reconnect on their own, whether or not their mom is a part of it. My prayers that your friend Moira gets the help she needs & reclaims her life in a way that she (and her children & friends) can be happy with.

Bugwit said...

"anyone mess with me, me lads or me maties and one will see a side of me that would turn ya pubes grey and fall out..."

Are you trying to get me to publicly admit to the condition of my pubic fuzz?

Pink said...

Toasty,

What a lovely thing you did for both your Matie and her kids. Do you ever get to see the kids?

I'm sure that having you as a friend has made a difference in her life and ability to cope. She will always remember you, too.
xx
pinks

Side Note said...

The world could use a few more people like you, Mel.

Interplanet Janet said...

Marmie,

You're just so damned beautiful. You are the definition of what a hero is.

Love,

Janet

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((jennifer)))~ is that like a tin of MUSHY peas LOL..... do you even have them over there? :)...... I AINT MUSHY and I only use me pinkie when drinking tea from a bonechina cup :) lol...xxxx

~(((((kati))))~ the photos are quite a few years old now...but the photo of Jacob and Bebhinn I so love.....so innocient.....no clue as to what was to come to their lives..... and all the kids know me door is always open, and they also know not to knock but just to come around the back.....

I hope that me matie at least finds peace.... and realises that often as not, it is ourselves that hold the key to our own happieness in life...... sometimes ya just gotta know which way the key turns....xxxxx

~(((Bugs)))~ Im just saying, I aint as soft as I might come across on here LOL..... I have a very stubborn fight for whats right side to me......and god help anyone that crosses the line :) - its not that I bare grudges, cos you can see that I dont, I find peace, but with certain things, I just bid me time...... and wait..... and suss out a suitable 'return' LOL..... be it spleen kidneys legs or whatever LOL.....we be like the mafia now me lads are older and one nod from mama and someone is going DOWN lmfao....hehehehehe xxx

~((((pink)))))~ me lads see Aiden and Connor the older lads and my Sam would see Ewen when his school played Ewen's school at Rugby Tournaments.... but I do know that they will turn up one day....with, do you remembers....and if Moira is alive then she will be sitting here one day when I come in from school....... well, unless I move to the states or something, lol...xxxx

~(((((((((((SideNote)))))))))~ you my dear man are to kind..... but fanks xxxxxx

~(((interplanet Janet)))))~ oh hush will ya, anyone would of done the same in my position......

And does your words mean that I get to wear me pants on the outside of me trousers and have a flappy cape? does it? aye? aye? :).........xxxxxx

YOU MATES HAVE BEEN WAY TO KIND WITH YOUR WORDS, COS I KNOW THAT ANYONE OF YOU WOULD OF DONE THE SAME IN THE GIVEN CIRCUMSTANCES....... :)......xxxxxx

Turnbaby said...

What a poignant post. Well done sugar

Interplanet Janet said...

(((Marmie))),

"And does your words mean that I get to wear me pants on the outside of me trousers and have a flappy cape? does it? aye? aye?"

I absolutely think you should do that - and I think you should have someone take a bunch of pictures of it and post them here for all of us to see... ROTFL :) :) :)

MarmiteToasty said...

~(((turnbaby)))~ See I do have a serious side :)......xxx

~(((interplant Janet))))~ borrowing old Mr Footes baggy Y-Fronts and climbing into me hero gear LMFAO........ now I might just have to do as you requested LOL...... you daft cow lMFAO.......xxxxx

Mr. Fabulous said...

Every day, in every way, you amaze me, my dear.

MarmiteToasty said...

~((((((MrFab)))))))~ gulp, oh hush, you will ruin me ard reputation ;) - just think of the stories I can not tell on here..... love ya xxxxx