Sometimes I Worry About My Sanity........

Ok........... usual laid back Saturday here.......got up to a pile of dishes to be dishwasher stacked..... asked the usual question to me lads 'which bit of someone stack the dishwasher, dont anyone get' ...... ok, Im on strike this morning..... so unless SOMEONE ANYONE but me loads the dishes then when all dishes/pots/pans/utensils in this house have been used to eat off of Im gonna bin the lot and dish ya dinner up off the floor..... :) there that got them moving :) - Jebus Im heartless sometimes, boys aint suppose to do anything right? THINK A BLOODY GAIN...... :).......

Right, here comes the 'your mental Mel bit' - I had to go to the reptile shop to get some dead frozen mice, and a box of live crickets and on the way back pick up my Sam who had stayed over at a 'house party' at his maties house (God help the parents when they come home)....... so there I am, driving along, when I suddenly think........shit why did I drive this way? why didnt I drive the back lanes way? AND THEN I SAW IT......... its a sign....... holy moly.......... ITS A BLEEDIN SIGN I tells ya....... there WAS afterall a reason as to why me brain, me soul, me very core took me the long way round.............

It was there, chained to a tree outside of someones house........ shining....... red and chrome...... with MY JACOBS name on it......... ITS A SIGN........sigh.......




Ok, let me explain....... Last year my Jacob was looking at a bike on the internet, it was a Stilletto Giant Chopper Style bike.....he looked longingly at this bike for days and days and talked about it with such lust..... BUT Jacob being Jacob would never of said 'mum can I have'.... he aint that sort of lad..... and he knew for a start that the bike was £350 ($700) which as bikes go is sort of expensive.......

But at christmas cos he needed a new bike for a bit of freedom and cos his BMX was well knackered that he had had 3 years previous, I bought him a lovely mountain bike with loads of them gear things :) ........ it was quite expensive but I got it in the sale for $400 so it was well a bargain, and the freedom its given him and me for that matter (cos less lifts to give) has been great........

So....... back earlier......... Driving down Sunnymead Drive, the long way round to pick up my Sam, and not knowing why I would of driven that way in the first place....... I saw this bike chained up to a tree outside of someones house with a FOR SALE sign on it....... my heart started to pound - OMG omg it was the red Stilletto Giant bike that Jacob has lusted for last year......... my head said drive on BUT my heart and soul said, just stop and have a butchers......... so after picking Sam up, 10 dead frozen white mice and a box of live crickets.... I drove back the way I had come, hoping in my heart of hearts that the bike was still there........

As we drive along the road I spot it on the next bend and I slam on the brakes lol my Sam almost shot through the windscreen lol........ and I just sit there in me car with Sam saying..... mum, what the hell ya doing......... so I says........ Sam, LOOK AT THAT, JUST LOOK AT THAT MUVVER........ I say to him, get out and have a proper look at it and go knock on the door of that house and see what they want for it........ mum, he says, it looks brand new and they are £350 ($700) so it aint gonna be cheap...... GET OUT THE BLEEDIN CAR AND GO ASK........ my heart pounding.......... my Jacob would die to get his hands on this bike.......... it had his name on it......... it was a sign that I went the wrong way....... it was meant to be...........

So, with that this huge scarey bloke comes out of the garden towards us........ hello, I says...... was looking at the bike........ oh he says, its almost new, we bought it a few months ago and its been ridden only probably 3 times and me kid dont like it........... so in a quiet voice I say........ how much was you looking for to get for it then...... so the bloke says, well make me an offer, you do know they are about 350 quid thats what we paid for it just after christmas.......... omg omg there is no way he would accept what I had in my head for it......... so jokingly I says........ I'll give you 50 quid ($100).... this HUGE bloke did the loudest belly laff I have ever heard....... your aving a laff right? he said.......... me with nervious laff.... yeah of course I was *stupid girlie giggle*........ what did you actually really want I asked again.... A SENSIBLE OFFER he boomed......

To be honest at this point I was a little affeared of this huge bloke and in my head was devising a plan of attack and how to take the muvver down to ground level if needs must LMFAO.........

With that he smiled the most lovely smile and started to laff........... look he said.... we really want rid so be sensible and just say what you want to pay......... so again I jokingly say....... 100 quid ($200) and it was a joke cos after all they are expensive and it was as new........... 'DONE' he said........ oh I said 'done' :) mega chufted....

I said I didnt have a 100 quid on me obviously, so he asked if I could leave a deposit and come back with the rest............. ha....

So I says....... a deposit...... ok well, I aint got no money on me but a couple of quid, but I can either leave you with my Sam *pointing at Sam* as a deposit until I get back....... or 10 dead white frozen mice..... or a box of 20 live crickets........

Cripes, the bloke almost fell on the floor, he creased up and held his sides...... 'the funny thing is' he said while laffing real loud 'is that YOUR SERIOUS' lol....... so we just shook hands and I said I would be back within half hour with the dosh to pick it up :)........

So now its sitting in old Mr Footes garage under an old duvet cover :)....... waiting for Jacobs Birthday on 10 June ....... SORTED......... well bloody sorted....... I know one young lad that is gonna be beaming from ear to bloody ear........and the thing is it aint a kids bike as such its HUGE......

check it out - http://www.rutlandcycling.com/ProductDetails/mcs/productID/5236

My Jacob loves bikes and he bought a bike last year off of ebay a greenmachine....... which is pretty cool..... so now with this other bike come his birthday he will have quite a collection..... now he just needs a penny farthing lol...... oye Shark, how about it? :) jokin..



It was meant to be......... and ya know what........ cos there is no way my lad would of asked for a bike so expensive........ IT WAS MEANT TO BE....... what a bargain...

Enuff Twaddle of a Saturday..... x

HUGE PS........ what I forgot to add ........ after putting the seats down in me car to fit the bike in and lobbing all the baby seats and booster seats on top, we are driving home when my Sam shouts STOP STOP STOP....... so again I slam on the brakes, thinking with me head in the clouds I had maybe run someone or something over..... we are stopped in the middle of a side road and Im thinking whatever Ive run over aint moving or making a sound........... BLOODY HELL MUM look at that, and as I look where he is pointing in someones drive, there is a bird........ not just any old bloody bird, but what looked like a guinea fowl thing........ could this possibly be a friend for Janet......... mum, lets get out and catch it...... I laffed and said you ave to be kidding right, nope he says...... so I move the car to the kerb and we get out, only armed with a teatowel that I found in the car that had been used to wipe up baby sick lol...... the plan was to corner the guinea fowl and lob the teatowel on its head and pick it up :) ---- easy right? ---- NO IT WAS NOT..... chased the bleedin bird around someones front garden and over their flower beds for nearly 10 minutes - well he did the chasing cos of me knee and I did the arm waving and hobbling and screaming lol - when it shot down their side alley and into their back garden, as we peered through the back gate it flapped over their back fence into the field behind....... dam... dam...... then the door of the house whose drive we was standing in and whose garden we had just ran all over, opened his side door and told us nicely to get out of his garden........ actually he said - GET OUT OF ME FUCKING GARDEN YOU IDIOTS BEFORE I CALL THE POLICE........ hahahahaha..... we made a quick getaway..... minus the guinea fowl.......... PRICELESS.......

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